I have a lot of mixed opinions on the porn industry nowadays.  I do think that it's a good thing that there is more homemade porn that people can put out because they enjoy it.  And they also have the ability to make themselves stars and money through channels like OnlyFans and live webcams.  I feel like this has also made porn and sex more accepted and less shameful.

Having said all of that, I feel it has also killed the mainstream business of porn.  I can't imagine how these companies can make the same money off of big porn stars when there is just so much free and competitive content out there now.

I think another downside is that the content has gotten so extreme that it has desensitized some people, especially younger people.  We see this all the time.  We've played with guys of all different ages and the younger ones are rougher and kinkier and I think a lot of it is due to the porn today.  And I am not talking about the rape scenes on something like Kink that OP referred to.  If the parties all consent and there are the proper precautions in place including safe words/ actions, other men and women on set to make sure everything is proper and not boundaries are crossed, etc., then I'm actually perfectly fine with it.  It's more of the amateur porn today where women are unknowingly getting themselves into abusive scenes without proper precautions.  Facial Abuse falls into this category.  All the younger guys are very familiar with their work and many have cited specific scenes of stuff they saw and want to do. 

Overall, things like facefucking, anal, pissing, and overall rough sex acts whether spanking, slapping, spitting, hair pulling, etc. just seem to be more commonplace in both porn and real life.  I also think there is much more emphasis on humiliation in porn which has also carried over into real life.  Most of the time it is humiliating the woman, however there has also been an uptick in male humiliation from cuckold scenarios.

I am not judging these acts themselves.  Hell, my GF LOVES being dominated and humiliated in bed.  I mean, she complains when a guy isn't rough with her.  But I always thought of her as in the minority, whereas in porn it almost seems to be the majority now.  Just because my GF likes it doesn't mean the majority of women want a guy to ram their cocks down their throats until they puke.  But its become a more and more common theme in porn and I think that is translating to real life sex too.

On 4/16/2024 at 1:29 AM, Juan234 said:

You have a lot of details to share.  One woman’s normal is a man’s fantasy.  Please do not spare the details!

I've spoken in my above posts.  What more would you like to know? 

And yes, it's become normal (but never boring) for me and the others in my poly family.  

12 hours ago, bbarnsworth said:

she presumes that opening the marriage will automatically induce additional stress. 

Agreed.  In our poly family, our experience is that having other intimate relationships besides a single spouse reduces stress considerably. 

12 hours ago, bbarnsworth said:

she presumes that opening up a marriage will likely lead to ending it,

For the above reason, I don't think that is the case.

If the husband is prepared to accept the potential for sexual inequality, then give it a try. You can always turn back (yet could you ?)

I knew one couple where the husband fared better with new partners, yet that was because she wasn't trying too much. It worked for them.

Now, for us, we had started Swinging and had been enjoying things. Yet, sex is very powerful and you cannot treat it lightly. So, we were openly discussing our Swing partners and he got a bit jealous. He couldn't help himself and said something really stupid.  He said,"It's not like you can just walk out of the apartment , meet some guy and fuck ?!" Are you nodding your head that that was pretty foolish ?

I stormed out of the apartment, went to an elite bar, a guy chatted me up, I explained that I was married and wanted a vengeance fucking. A man of his word, we went to a boutique hotel nearby and he truly fucked me into next week and more.

I went home, walked in and Alex knew right away that I was disheveled, had had it really put to me and was smiling like he had rarely seen.

He never spoke to me that way again. 

With respect to my fellow forum members, I'm going to have to disagree that Amy's response is very thoughtful.

My reasons are threefold; one she presumes that a married couple with kids can't engage in this lifestyle. That's utterly false. Two, she presumes that opening the marriage will automatically induce additional stress. Three, she presumes that opening up a marriage will likely lead to ending it, yet doesn't back it up with any supporting evidence. She just presumes it will likely end the marriage. So, the short form is "It's ok to try it if you like stress, don't have kids, and want to end your marriage. Go for it!"

Sorry, I'm not on board. I find her response judgmental, cynical, and deeply critical.