Ok.. Now if you have been following parts 1& 1a, and then part 2, you know that, it our firm belief that sharing fantasies and talking about them is the greatest ally you have in moving things from fantasy to reality.

This brings us to a issue that most every person on the planet runs into at some point, if they are involved in the lifestyle or not..

Personal issues or Hang Ups..

Now I am going to be a bit controversial here, and use the idea put forth in the first blog, that, for the most part, its us guys that put the idea to our lovely partners, spouse or girlfriend that gets the topic of swinging to the for front.

I can tell you, regardless of the beauty, or the size, a woman will still have some sort of personal pet peeve or issue regarding their looks .. And considering that fact that this involves getting naked with other people, often somewhat strangers, this can be compounded.

Now then, lets be honest about a few facts, usually when we are dating the compliments on looks come fast and furious from our lips, to their ears.. Since we are being honest, while I am sure the words I LOVE YOU are SAID a number of times, when was the last time you told her she looked good, hell when was the last time you told her she looked sexy? When was the last time you caught her in her bra and panties, and told her hot she looked, or better yet, showed her !

Confidence in ones self is the best way to combat these issues and the people that we love get armed for this combat by US. If they KNOW they look great, then its not an issue. Its by hearing it constantly, and being honest with them, that builds the confidence.

I have heard from so many people just getting started how, they are worried about looks.. And to be frank and honest, wanna know a real secret?

Take a trip to ANY store or mall on a Saturday. Observe the people walking the mall, down thru the aisles. Does anyone stand out? Maybe, but they are everyday people.. These people look the same as the people that your local club has for clientele.. Just like the people SHOPPING, the people SWINGING look like EVERYONE ELSE.

A old joke used to be around that

I wouldn’t be a member of a club that had people like me as a member..

But that’s the honest truth, Its not just the beautiful people but EVERYONE..

Gentlemen come in all shapes and sizes as well as cock sizes.. And women are the same.. All shapes and sizes.. Boobs in sizes from the 26a cups to the 60EEE cups.. From the twiggy types, to the Big Beautiful Women ( Swinger Termz: BBW) and trust me, there are just as many Men lusting after ALL these types as there are Women.

Whats a bigger issue, is the fact that almost every person we know that is in the lifestyle, is worried about one thing more important than looks..

Discretion

Way back in the 80’s another old phrase was used a lot, and it holds true for this lifestyle..

What you see here, what you hear here, what you DO here, let it stay here

But that’s a topic for another chapter..

Ok, time for another example..

Rich and his wife, Lauren, are just getting into the lifestyle, and after much discussion, they decide to go to a meet and greet held at a local watering hole Friday night. From Monday thru til Friday, Lauren was freaking out over what she would look like, what she would wear, and more importantly, what she didn’t tell Rich, would anyone ELSE find her attractive.. She chooses three outfit’s a day, and by the end of the week still has no clue as to what to wear.. Friday morning she makes up an excuse and ducks out of work early, and goes to the local mall, and buys a new outfit..

Friday evening comes and they head out, because the meet and greet is held at a regular bar, they arrive and walk in.. and the first problem arises, SURPRISE, it’s a bar full of people, all dressed like people out on a Friday nite.. Rich orders a few drinks and Lauren is having severe nerves, questioning everything from her dress, to where are these people..

Then almost by chance she overhears a conversation between two women in the restroom, discussing the events of last weekend, and what brought Lauren out of her trance was.. And Jimmy shaves the hair off his.. .. She pushed her nerves aside and asked, Umm, are you here for the meet and greet.. And almost as fast as she said it, she regretted it, fearing they might not be.. They both broke into a big smile and introduced themselves.. They led Lauren out to the end of the place where a group of people, like everyone else in the place was hanging out and having a great time.. The two women set off introducing her, as she was trying to get Rich’s attention..

By the end of the night, they had made a dozen new friends, been offered a dozen email addresses, and twice that in telephone numbers.. The ride home was more discussing the conversations and the new people they had met than anything else..

Now, while Lauren was nervous about a Vanilla meet and greet, its really no different than any other activity.. Just the degree, or pace at which things happen.

On premises clubs, or house parties are a dimension to themselves, but again, its everyday people. The reason I say a dimension unto themselves is because its completely normal to see people in all manner of dress, and undress there.. Hell, the first house party we went to, we were greeted by the hostess, in a pair of black panties and a white dress shirt, hanging wife open. Now that having been said, remember each place has their own rules, and you can expect various stages of undress. Some may not allow it in public, and others could care less.

Most of these places have all sorts of people show up, from those that jump in right away, to people who come week after week, and never get naked. Others who go, and never play with anyone else, but love it when people watch them..

Again, these people are the same as everyone else.. From the lovely, to the normal.. From the firm and fit to the round and curvy... to the soft and fluffy..

But the biggest thing that anyone needs to understand when getting involved, is that, if at any time, from the first meeting right up to the final seconds before actual intercourse, its perfectly fine to say STOP.. Or NO..

No means NO , and Never needs to be explained.. Its also, perfectly fine, if someone doesnt float your boat to say no thank you.. With the number of people involved, its YOUR choice, who and when you play..

So, lets sum up.. The only issue anyone SHOULD have is about what they are comfortable WITH, not what they look like. People are people.. It doesn’t matter if they are super models, or every day folks.. People in this lifestyle come in all shapes and sizes..

And remember beauty is in the eye of the beholder, not the mirror that you judge YOURSELF in.