Wow, this is so true. There is a lot of energy invested in swinging, and part of it is emotional. It is different than other hobbies because it involves validation and/or rejection on a sexual level as well as a social one. Remember the anguish from high school? It's a little like that, and I would never go back there. Ugh.

I am the one who does all the searching, all the emailing, etc. in our "hunt". Sometimes I think Mr. Fuse doesn't appreciate it very much. I wish I could get him to understand about the emotional energy part of it. But the reason I'm doing it and not him, is because it comes more naturally to me. He wouldn't have it in him to expend this kind of energy, so he doesn't understand what it takes. He has a hard enough time getting it through his head that sometimes people shouldn't be taken at face value and that just because they like you, it doesn't mean you don't have to try. It's that emotional energy thing.

Yes, it's worth it to continue. Just think of the fun we get to have, as a reward for all of our work.

We've been dealing with this a lot around here as well. It is hard when things are tough, when parties don't go quite like you'd hoped, or miscommunication happens and you can't help but wonder "is it really all worth the trouble?". I don't know how many different things within swinging that at some point we've been like "this just isn't worth it... let's not do that anymore" then after we think about it we decide maybe it is worth it and maybe we will give THAT just one more try and see how it goes.

ExploringRM

Is it truly worth it? One has to question, why we do it all? Plan weeks in advance (Months for some), built up the expectations (Sometimes we are let down), buy new outfits, spend hours conversing with the potential playmates, spend the wee hours of the night acting like college kids, the hang overs, the exhaustion, the rug burns..... The list goes on.....

Again, that burning question, "Is it worth it?"

When Mrs. CXXC and I look back at the events we have attended or the couples we have enjoyed together or separately, we sit back, look to the sky and smile with a resounding YES!

Ms. Fuse

I too take the roll of "Researcher". Mrs. CXXC gives the final approval, yet I dont believe she is aware of the investment of time and effort it takes to rifle through the E-mails, profiles, PM's and various chat request (Not to mention the picture requests) that come in regularly.

As for the emotional side of the lifestyle, the heart is just as important as the mind and the libido. If you are not emotionally invested (At least while engaged) I think you may as well just go sit in the corner and please yourself. Now, What fun is that?

Not just looking at it from the point of, Is the sexual satisfaction worth it? When I look back at the woman I was before we started swinging to the woman I am today. Hell yes it was worth every bit of time, energy, effort and money. Plus the bonus of a lot of fun walking down this road on a journey of a lifetime together. I have become a better person, a self confident, opinionated, gutsy, sexually liberated, strong vibrant women. Instead of a sexually immature, low self esteem, lacking confidence, and very petty jealous women. I have grown up in a way that I never expected and I really like who I am now. Hubby loves me even more.

Yes, yes. There have been times when my wife and I have felt a need to rest as a result of our weekend of recreation. But I'll tell you something. If I ever begin to have thoughts that I need to go to the office on Monday to have a break from weekend partying, I will abandon the lifestyle immediately.

I agree about the emotions and general effort. Sometimes we're wrung out at the end of the night at a club, even if we haven't played.

However, as a play friend said in bed one night: these are the moments we'll remember when we're old!