Mrs. CXXC and I will be taking a vacation in a few weeks. While we are away, family members will be coming to Savannah and staying in our home for our time away providing them with a rather inexpensive vacation for themselves. To this, I can only say, "MUST BE NICE!" However, the facts that they get to stay in a tourist location for free, drink my booze, eat my food, sleep in my bed etc... are not the main issues. The main issue is securing the home from Vanilla prying eyes.

When the visitor looks about, these are the things they are most likely (and do) notice and on occasion, mention.

Beds in virtually every room of the house

Blankets and pillows nearly every room

TV’s with DVD players in nearly every room

Fully stocked bar with stemware for 12 (You name the glass and we have it)

Hand sanitizer on the night stands and end tables

Tissue boxes on the night stands and end tables

Boxes of mints and many breath strips stocked in the cupboards

Hand held shower heads in each bathroom

Fruits, veggies and various finger foods stocked in the fridge

Huge Bath sheets, extra plush towels and an excessive number of bed linens for each bed

6 bath robes

An 8 person hot tub

At least one case of 16oz bottled water at any given time

5 pounds of coffee and a Bunn-o-matic coffee maker (Makes a pot in 3 minutes. I LOVE THAT SUCKER)

Beds in virtually every room? I mention to the enquiring mind that we have lots of guests and they understand. I dismiss any thoughts of the “Kinky” nature of having an 8 person hot tub by informing them that I got it for a song. Hand held shower heads are quite common and go unnoticed. TV’s with DVD players in all rooms are the norm these days, providing there are no porno movies playing or in them at the time of the visit. Sensual foods in the fridge and a fully stocked bar are over looked after our schedule and entertainment practices are mentioned. Most people know that I am a little germ-phobic so the hand sanitizer is easy to explain. Everyone knows I love coffee and that when we have guests, they drink it as well….

Now, I am certain everyone reading this will agree, no unusual conclusions could be drawn form visiting my home.

The big issue is the Adult DVD collection and assorted Adult paraphernalia.

Just what do you do with all of your stuff when you have company? People snoop! This is a fact of life. We keep everything out of harms way by storing it in our master suite and bath but while we are away, the mice will look for the “Cheese” so to speak.

We have decided that the best course of action is to take everything that could “out” us and pack it in a trunk with a lock. This truck will be stored in my Utility shed with various items stacked on it. It should look like just another box of tools among the many I have.

So now, we are going through the process of making sure NO Adult movies are in the DVD players. We are gathering up all the Adult toys, lubes, condoms, restraints, love whips, blind folds, or other Adult utilities and placing them in the trunk. We are taking ANY and all club wear or lingerie that Mrs. CXXC would wear and storing that there as well. All the Lifestyle associated Shirts, shorts etc.. are bundled in as well. I even gave a moments thought about replacing the hand held shower heads with your standard ones. That was silly.

I know that people will look in cupboards, cabinets, closets, drawers, computers (Very locked down with guest accounts available if they wish to use them) under beds, bathroom cabinets and the like. It is our nature to snoop!

Once we return and everyone is finished with spring break, we can pull the trunk out and go back to our normal existence. BUT What a drag!

The other option is to leave everything where it is and let them all think we are a couple Pervs. HA HA HA HA! Nahhh….. That would just bite us in the rear in time. SIGH! Looks like I have to finish packing. UGH!