Ignoring someone, who is hurting, is wrong.

First, congratulations on the 25 years.

Second, if you treat each and every moment, regardless of how good, or how bad, it might be, with Gator, as a gift, you're doing it right, and will have no regrets.

As for the problems with the poly, you can't live Kittens life for her, she needs to decide if both her relationship with Tech, and with you and Gator, are worth making the effort to keep it going. While, I'll admit, I've not followed your postings thoroughly, and you don't know me from Francis Johnson of Darwin, Minnesota; it sounds like, from your side of it, that Kitten may have reached a decision.

So yes, step back from the poly, and take Gator somewhere exotic for a week or two, or even just somewhere you've never been. Maybe go somewhere quiet, and laid back, where the only horns you hear are the ferry boats coming in. (yes, I'm about to play travel agent ) https://www.mackinacisland.org/

Either way, go and LIVE with Gator, enjoy what you're doing, enjoy what he's doing, enjoy where you are, even if it's just sitting around the house for a week being lazy.

Jason

I'm sorry that your poly relationship is on hold. I've been there. One of the four of us just had too many issues. Like you, we are still in touch, and there is still love there, but we will never go back to being a foursome. Mr. Fuse was very very patient , loving and tolerant with me when I was crying every day over another man. I wish I had as much tolerance as he does, when he still seems to hope at times.

Please take care of Gator and also take care of yourself. You know you can count on each other. Like our grandmothers always said, health is paramount. With it, anything is possible; without it, so much is out of reach. Congratulations on your anniversary. I wish you many happy returns.

Yes, take care of Gator and celebrate life.

~M

Life and love are precious and fragile, and sometimes they're overwhelmingly complex. I wish you the best.

Gator isn't up to a trip yet but we'll look at your suggestion when he is. And I'm more than happy to spend any kind of time with him. Once again, these two things going on in our life have only made he and I closer.

I'm sad to not be seeing Tech and sad that Gator isn't having as fulfilling a life as that is possible. He's very happy with me, have no doubt about that. But, it's sad to know someone isn't willing to make the effort to even make herself happy. We are sad that what amounts to our best friends are going through such a rough time. Tech and Gator will be in more contact than anyone as they are truly close friends without the quad relationship being involved. We aren't dwelling on that and have not completely given up hope that things will work.

Everyone here is so nice. Just as they've been from the first day we found this place.

Mrs. CXXC and I wish Gator a speedy recovery. We hope that you are both able to fully enjoy every second.

{Hugs}

Trixie

Our best wishes to all of you, especially Gator for a full recovery.

I don't find your thoughts confusing and actually never have. If anything, insperational....

Its not always the rules we play by in life. Sometimes its faith in each other.

(More Hugs)

I'd missed hearing from you. I am so glad to hear that Gator is recovery. That must have been incredibly frightening. And then your quad on possible permanent hiatus must be incredibly sad, frustrating, angering, and every other emotion you could tack on to this sentencee. I'm so sorry about all of it. It must have been, and likely remains to some extent, a very stressful time.

I don't have anything worthwhile to say, other than thank you for posting. I hope Gator's recovery continues to go well, and here's to 25 more years...