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My Maiden Solo Voyage

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The Fuse

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I don't have any real reason to post this, except that I was thinking about it...

 

Last night Mr. Fuse and I had planned to go to a house party. My main hope in going was to play with the male half of a couple we know. Mr. Fuse is not a match with his wife, so under our current "rules", the only way I could hope to play with him was at a house party where people were mixing it up. The guy and I had kind of made a date to be together at this party, and I was really looking forward to it, hoping it would happen. (I know that's a bad idea, but I did it anyway.)

 

Well, yesterday Mr. Fuse said he was starting to feel like he either had allergies or was coming down with a cold. By the evening, he had a headache. When he gets a headache he is pretty much "out" as far as interacting with anyone, including me. This happens every so often and spoils whatever plans we have made, whether social or not.

 

In this case, he said he was fine if I went by myself, for which I was grateful. So, off I went... with the understanding that I was only to play with the guy in question, unless there was someone else there we already knew and both approved of. I was really happy my husband was comfortable enough to let me go to the party by myself. First of all, it meant we are evolving further past our "everything must be fair and we must always be together" phase. Second of all, I was really horny for the guy I'd made the plans with :D. We had been wanting to get together for a while, and now here was our chance.

 

Some folks around here know that I have sometimes felt a bit held back by my sweetheart's shyness and his tendency to depend on me in social situations. Not that I ever wanted to be alone, but often I have wished he would take more responsibility for himself, not only socially, but in making opportunities for play.

 

Well, here I was all on my own, and suddenly it was weird. I didn't have him to go to when I wasn't engaged in a conversation with someone. I don't have any problem just talking to whomever is near me, but... it was still a bit strange. I felt a bit insecure without him there. I wondered whether people would think I was cheating on him. Our host, whom I'd just met that night, forgot I was married and started referring to me as single.

 

It had its upside though. While my 'date' and I were playing, I didn't have to worry about whether my husband was feeling abandoned. And my playmate and I danced a lot together in between sessions, sort of part of the sexy buildup... boy that was nice... and I didn't have to worry about my husband fending for himself socially while we were dancing. That part was a relief. But overall, I would have liked it better if he had been there.

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Glad you shared what was on your mind. JoAnn and I have both had "dates" with one lifestyle acquaintance or another. And we feel OK about becoming separated from each other at a house party. In either of these situations we do not really feel disconnected.

 

We both know that we would probably feel disconnected and awkward going alone to a house party. I would not go alone to a house party. People simply frown on married men doing this even if they are already familiar with the couple. Can't say, however, that JoAnn would not go alone.

 

I guess what I'm trying to say is I feel a little better knowing that JoAnn and I are not alone feeling the comfort or discomfort of this kind of situation.

 

~Michael

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Yep, it almost seems kinda pointless without the wife there. We've played alone and its been fun but its not the kind of experience we really want to get out of it.

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Great post Fuse. With the first few sentences I wasn't sure what direction the story would go....

 

Thank you for sharing this.

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Thanks, everyone, for the comments.

 

Turns out one of the other couples at the party is a new possibility for Mr. Fuse and me. Since we are "not meeting new couples" right now, this is a big bonus. I had sent them a friendly email after the party, not expecting anything to come of it. To my surprise, now we have a real dialogue going. We've already spent some time getting acquainted as a foursome in a group outing in a vanilla bar. Now, we may see them again two-on-two. The lady is just Mr. Fuse's type. He was instantly captivated. I like the guy, too, though he's the type I build up an affinity for rather than a right-away-slam-dunk.

 

So, you just never know... give, and you might receive.

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I too wondered where this was going when I first started reading. I was quite satisfied that in the end, you were able to connect and play with your friend. In contrast, my wife had expressed a feeling of being unfair in some of our endeavours, when she got one up on me. I assured her that she was so far off the mark, fair wasn't an issue, if she had fun, it was fair. Period. And even further, my greatest pleasure was in seeing, or even just hearing, of her's.

 

And you still had his concerns and feelings right there with you. Nice, very nice.

 

Great post.

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