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Clubs...

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exploringRM

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In a recent blog I posted how we have really come to like house parties. This past weekend a party we had planned to attend was canceled so we decided to head out to a swing club.

 

We've not been to a club, since May I think and then we met friends for fun and frolic. This weekend we went without any meeting with another couple setup. It just reinforced my opinion on how much fun house parties are.

 

It's so much easier to talk to people..you are sort of thrown together and have to talk. And when it comes to play time, odds are there's someone there for us. The club makes it seem all too hard to find (and talk to) play partners.

 

We did run into a couple we knew and hung out with them. They are only looking for a f-f encounter with no m-f interaction so really not for us. But my wife and her did play a bit in the hot tub, which was fun to watch and fun for my wife.

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Clubs for us has turned us into poser attractors. We can find every attractive non-swinging couple and waste an entire evening talking to them before they make that clear.

 

I would think it was just us but we found many of them followed the same pattern with others too.

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We've done that a few times, spent too much time before finding out what the other couple is there for. The couple mentioned in my first post in this blog; when we first met them we spent a lot of time talking before we found out they were looking for female encounters only. I guess that sort of worked out a little for our recent encounter with them, but not our main interest. But we've even encountered that issue at a house party, spending time with a couple that was no interested in sex with others, just same room sort of thing.

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Whether at a house party, club, online or meet and greet, if we are interested in a couple, I always ask what they are looking for, and before spending a large chunk of time talking to them. If we're not looking for the same things, then we can either still hang out with them or, if we are feeling more "goal oriented", we can move on. But at least we know what's possible, and what's not. As earlier commenters have noted, it's especially important in a club. You meet someone, you like them... but people are looking for a myriad of things. Best to tell them you think they're hot... and ask them "what are you into"?

 

Even when meeting from an online profile, where people have described in writing what they are looking for, it is important since people often either hold back or simply don't update.

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