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The Glorified Thank You Note
Its funny how I will write a blog a couple weeks in advance and come to find someone has posted the same topic on the discussion boards just before my posting date! Well, forgive the redundancy. I figure this may be a different take on the topic and perhaps will generate some interesting feedback.
About three years ago, I started to look into the numerous sites devoted to the Lifestyle. I am certain you are well aware of the fact that there are a GREAT number of them. The number grows each month. Each site claims to be the largest, most exciting and the best. They also claim to have the hottest and sexiest members. Some sites even guarantee that you will get laid!
Many, if not all offer a free trial membership. The most limiting aspect of these trial memberships are the ability to view photos along with limited contact ability. Some sites even turn off the free trial after a certain period of time. Unfortunately, I have discovered that the only real use of a free membership is to see just how many members they have in the viewers area.
One function that most sites share is the ability to certify other members. I feel this is a VERY important feature. With the certifications, you know they are, pretty much, a real couple within the lifestyle. Sure, one can create bogus accounts and make up certifications for themselves. By and large, the certifications are real and the recipient is as well. You also can gage the kind of couples/individuals that the certified couples/individual are engaged with. If one puts forth a bit of effort, one can gain quite a bit of information from drawing a comparison from the certificates and the profile of the certified.
Mrs. CXXC and I use the certificates as a baseline. Sure, it is easy to just take them at face value. That is not what we do. We look at the similarities between them. I generally pick them apart by categories.
1. Personality
2. Sexuality
3. Comfort
The Certification should cover each of these items very quickly and easily. HOWEVER, may people don’t go into such great detail. They simply tell the reader that they had a great time “Meeting” this couple/individual and cannot wait for another meeting. These certifications lack in so much information.
I have a habit of being rather long winded in my certification. I feel I am justified in this as the certified deserve to be praised for being such wonderful people. If they are not wonderful, well, I simply do not write certifications for them. Fortunately, We have not experienced many of the “Not Great” couples/individuals.
We have also discovered an interesting thought process in the lifestyle regarding certificates. Some people will not approach others without having been certified. I can understand some of the reasoning behind this. No certificates may mean that the people are new and new people may not be secure. The non-certified may also be HORRIBLE within the aspects and activities of the Lifestyle. And others may even be fake. Not wanting to waste time on fakes, lets just keep with the certified. And so on!
Mrs. CXXC and I have received some truly great certificates from our playmates. I often sit back and ponder what they saw in us. I also down play my talents and personality so I often feel like they are exaggerating in their claims or recount. I am, in no way saying that they are telling falsehoods. They experienced what they experienced. In their telling, we were, to them, those things. Who and what we are to them is a matter of opinion. To some, we are hot and sexy. To others, we may not be. It is in the eyes of the ….. Well you get my point.
We re-read them from time to time and recall the events with great fondness. Those first times with these individuals are always fresh in our minds. Certificates help us remember the activities clearly!
We don’t always receive certificates tho! Some people simply do not write them. They still enjoy our time together and schedule future dates and such. They just don’t wish to write about it. We are not going to prod or beg them to do so. That is not who or what we are. It is nice to receive them but not at all necessary. The fact that I will write the certifications shortly after the people leave is not expected in return! We have Lifestyle friends with whom we have partied that have yet to write one for us. We partied with them MONTHS ago! Do we really care if they do write them? No. It is just a little something we enjoy, like a thank you card.
So, what do you think? Are Certifications an important part of the lifestyle sites? Do you write certifications for your playmates? Do you expect your playmates to write them for you? What negative aspects can you see in writing certificates?
I guess when you think about it, it is one of the last holdouts of etiquette. Remember your mother forcing you to sit at the kitchen table and write Auntie or Uncle a thank you note for the wonderful Birthday Sweater? How about the thank you cards you sent out for the gifts you received at your wedding? Did you write thank-you notes to your interviewers after you were seen for that job? Certificates are not only a way of letting others know the people are real, they are a reflex from our past. They are the glorified Thank You Note.
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