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What are the most important things you have learned during swinging?

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sexycouple1

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A while ago I asked a certain person who had been in the swinging lifestyle what they had learned over the years.

 

I expected to receive a few words of wisdom from their many encounters and experiences but alas the other only thing that person had to say was a flat resounding "Nothing"

 

Well we have been in it for only a year and it has been a roller coaster ride the whole time.

 

I have learned many things. I have grown closer to my wife because of the things I have learned and I think changed for the better for it.

 

Looking back I don't think I liked myself in the beginning when we started this swinging thing. I acted more for myself and was a little selfish at times during this whole process. But I learned to listen better and communicate better with my wife than we had in years, if ever.

 

I have learned to trust her better and she has learned to trust me better as well. That new found trust has led to a much deeper relationship and love than we actually had before this lifestyle started.

 

Swinging I found starts first with you and your spouse not the "others" . Nothing else matters in the big picture of things. I make sure my wife is happy and she makes sure I am happy and we go from there to make every other decision regarding swinging.:cool:

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This sounds like it could be a fun topic. For us, swinging made a big change in the way we communicate with each other. We found a new level of interaction and new ways to express our love for each other. We both know, with complete certainty that there's nothing the world can throw at us that would break us apart like we see happen with too many friends and neighbors. We enjoy the excitement leading up to a sex party and we appreciate the confidence and trust in each other while we're actively involved with someone new at the party.

 

But, I think the most important thing we've learned through swinging is the enhanced respect and appreciation we have for each other. There's not another soul on the face of this planet that I would rather share my life with. I think I'm the luckiest man in the world.

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I have to second the ultimate affirmation of your own spouse. Swinging has been great fun, but it wouldn't have been so without my best friend to share the experiences with. Communication improvement? Absolutely. Self-knowledge, yes. All that and a bag of chips, to share with my hubby at the end of the day.

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My take on this question probably fits my personality, is my first thoughts were the negatives not the positives.

 

We have had plenty of positive things we have learned in swinging. But in a way those seem almost mundane.

 

The things we have learned that first came to mind while reading the title of this blog were things like.

 

  • Trust absolutely no one online to be who they say they are.
     
  • Realize couples lie together as surely as any single will lie to you to get in your pants.
     
  • Know that everyone has a different definition of recent especially when it comes to pictures.
     
  • If they say they have never done this before they're still a good chance they have done this before.
     
  • Always get money for the hotel room prior to play.
     
  • Never invite them over to your home based only on their online profile.

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All I needed to know about life I learned in swinging:

 

1) Respect yourself, your spouse/SO, and others you meet.

2) No means no

3) Play nicely and share your toys. ;)

4) COMMUNICATION is everything!

5) Don’t be afraid to look silly and have some FUN!

6) Be yourself.

 

 

=)

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Trust your instincts. They are usually right, and if you ignore them, you'll realize your mistake at some point.

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YOU GOT IT RIGHT PB&J above

 

So Many times I would not trust my wife's instincts or intuition on people we would meet or situations we would be in. I usually thought of it as her just being nervous about the situation.

 

She proved right so man times I dont even question her any more. Now I've come more attuned to the"flags" and can better read between the lines on a couples profile on what they really meant or what they want or how they react to certain things we say in person.

 

Basically dont go through the meet & greets, the dates, the parties, or the sex with others with blinders on.(thinking sex , sex ,sex all the time) Think before you act and sometimes even while your acting. Have fun but dont be stupid at the expense of yourself or your spouse.:cool:

Edited by sexycouple1

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