I'm in a private group on Facebook for folks with dirty minds. I suspect some folks might be in the lifestyle, but there are definitely some that aren't. Either way, today's conversation was about things we've stopped doing that we shouldn't have. It was based on a list in this months "Cosmo" magazine.

Of course, several of the things listed are things I still do, like: Running around naked just because; Playing Spin the Bottle; Always having a crush (celebrity or otherwise); Dressing festively for holidays. One of the items listed was random hookups.

Being the wiseacre, I replied, "Random as in, "What's his name again?" I was accused of bedpost notching, and because it's de rigueur for this group, I replied, "Well, where else am I supposed to anchor the restraints?"

One gentleman replied that it's a thankless job, but it has to be done. I suggested that perhaps he could star in one of those "Real Men of Genius" commercials for Budweiser. That, of course, set off a flash of inspiration, so I wrote one of my own:

Today we salute you, Mr. Bedpost Notch. You're not good enough for more than a one-night-stand, or for the ladies to remember your name. But you have the panache to pick up a girl who's had one too many cosmos, and give her a night to remember . . . almost. So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, because without you, those girls wouldn't have anything to 'fess up to in Truth or Dare.

=)