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Special K

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socolais

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So, we've been playing the Karezza game for about four months now and have refined a few of our earlier observations.

 

Think of the continuum between sexual satisfaction and sexual frustration much like the number line we all learned in grade school. Frustration, would be the negative numbers and satisfaction the positive. We each have a range of preferred locations along this line. A fulfilling and exciting sexual encounter is likely to put us higher on the scale of satisfaction. Any particular sexual event is quite likely to be more satisfying to one person than another. Frustration events are also likely to be evaluated at different points along the line by each participant. The sad part is, a satisfying event for one person may invoke frustration in another. We each have our own individual "balance point" and are typically motivated to preserve a positive slant in our sexual behavior. When we feel the onset of frustration (or an undesirable backslide in that direction), we are motivated to seek out sexual interaction we expect to be rewarding and satisfying. The real trick is maintaining a healthy positive balance for both partners in the relationship.

 

Karezza has a unique way of satisfying that keeps us closer to our balance point and therefore "needing" more frequent encounters to preserve our positive balance. In our early experiments with Karezza, that balance was fun simply because it kept us "hungry" for the next playtime. A constant state of hunger looses its novelty fairly quickly and the perception of frequent "sexual need" is quite less than satisfying. Practicing pure Karezza is like "edging" on the frustration boundary. The occasional orgasms are ferociously intense and explosively satisfying, but they violate the purity of Karezza and have a negative influence toward the dreaded state of habituation.

 

We're searching for the balance point that keeps us both smiling with orgasmic bliss and enthusiastically wanting the next soulfully satisfying cuddle. Throw the occasional sex party into that mix and we hope for a blue ribbon recipe for the sexual side of happiness. We still like the non-goal oriented aspect of Karezza for routine penetrative cuddles while we acknowledge our need for special orgasms. The negative aspect of the orgasms are balanced by the adventurous sex party.

 

We both feel Karezza has made us better lovers by promoting attention toward simple pleasures and decreasing attention toward orgasms. Our lovemaking is now much more playful and sensual.

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I would be skeptical of any formal Karezza training, but I guess somebody out there conducts organized workshops. A couple hours following Google will be enough to understand the basics sufficient to make a decision to pursue it or not. I believe full understanding can't be had until it is experienced - too many subtle nuances that may be unique to individuals. I encourage everyone with the curiosity to give it a try. The worst case is that you loose a month's worth of orgasms. The up side is new skills in the bedroom. It takes a commitment from both spouses to really give it a fair evaluation.

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Interesting . . . sounds like something worth looking into . . . Glad you've found it to be a positive experience.

 

=)

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Karezza offers an opportunity to counteract the effects of sexual habituation (the gradual loss of that honeymoon feeling). Swinging also has a reputation for busting habituation (novel sex partners invoke a dose of New Relationship Energy). It was the effect on habituation that got us interested in Karezza because we had slowed down in our sex party activities and felt the onset of habituation.

 

So, yes, our observation is that Karezza works. We think the effect also compliments swinging in a very fun way. I also think experienced swingers have a head start in practicing Karezza because of exposure to the periodic impulses of NRE.

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Hmm . . . Mr. Sweet is away for a bit, but this may be something to try--after that "welcome home" Dopamine fix, lol.

 

=)

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