Those few rare moments in life that we all come across from time to time. You know the kind i'm talking about? The ones that come form out of nowhere and deal you one of those life altering moments. We have all had them at certain times in our lives, the one that you never forget where you were at the moment. Needless to say, if you can't tell one of those moments happened this past weekend.

The weekend started out great, i mean it could not have been any better than it was. So let me set the scene for you. Some of you know that Kitten and I are involved in a poly relationship with Gator and Vol. We have been "seeing each other for a little over a year now, and just like any other relationship we have had our ups and downs (mostly up's). Now Gator and Vols youngest son has not understood the relationship we have and has been very outspoken about the relationship. That fact alone has made it rough at times on all of us. However that is another blog all together. However over the past several weeks there has been kind of a "warming up" so to speak with gator and vols youngest, and things have gone very well.

Our two younger sons have been very open to the relationship and wish us all nothing but the best. Wow...our two younger sons... 20 and 18. that does make me feel old sometimes, however not as old as Gator i think. Ok, I joke. the joke is that I (Tech) am the youngest of our happy little extended family (36). Anyway, our two younger sons have been around pretty much since the start of our relationship and they get along great with Gator and Vol. Almost to the point of an actual Son and Parent relationship. which as you can guess after having the problems in the past with Gator and Vol's youngest is a bit of a relief. Our oldest son is 21 and in the Air Force and stationed in England right now. He came home on a 30 day leave last month and needless to say after not seeing the boy for two years he was a welcome sight to both mom and dad. During this time we planned on telling him about Gator and Vol and how they fit into our lives and the extent of the relationship with them. Needless to say Gator and Vol were a little nervous about the whole thing. So we all meet for dinner and everything goes smooth Our oldest likes Gator and Vol and think they are "cool, for old people" haha.

So this past weekend was our sons last weekend home. He was to depart at 3p.m. going back to England. The problem was both Kitten nor I could miss work. So who steps in and asks if they could take him to the airport?

Thats right. Gator does.

So this past weekend being Gators long weekend (he works shift work) He and Vol come up to spend the weekend with us. Now, a few weekends ago Gator had to work, Kitten had to take our 2nd son to get an i.d. card (his D.L. has been suspended, long story but funny non the less.) so having to have a "father/son" conversation with my dad we all sit down and decide that it might be a good idea if Vol comes along with me. So off we go. Now before you get to far ahead of yourself this was not a "coming out" conversation with my dad. He and mom divorced a few years ago and it was mor of a "how ya doing" conversation. anyway, I got sidetracked but it was a little background info for ya.

So that brings us to this weekend. Oldest son's last weekend home before he heads back to England and then for a six month deployment to Iraq. Well he had seen everybody that he wanted to except for Kittens mom and dad. So they get up bright and early Sunday morning and Kitten, Gator and #1 Son head to go see his grandfather (Kittens dad). Both Vol and I were planning on going but both of us have been a little under the weather the last few days, so we stayed home. So, after getting everybody up and dressed and our of the house to go do whatever they have to do, Vol and I are looking at an empty house, which doesn't happen very often. So being a tad bit under the weather but otherwise feeling pretty good we do exactly what any other normal, rationale sexually active adults would do. Thats right, we jumped right back into bed and....went to sleep. YES SLEEP!! I mean what could have been better? Friday night our three boys and two of their friends and Gator and Vol and their youngest son all got together and went bowling. Saturday we all sat around laughing and cutting up and doing something. Now, Sunday the last bit of clothes for our oldest were packed and he, Gator and Kitten are going to see Kittens dad and Vol and I have time for nothing but some peace and quite and some sleep. Whats better...not much.

Talk about the quite before the storm. I'm talking an F-5 tornado, a class five hurricane and the four horsemen riding at full gallop and just running you right over. Never in my life have I went from total euphoria to total nothingness. I get a call from Kitten Sunday afternoon on their way back from seeing her dad telling me that her mom has passed. Now, I'm not talking about something that you knew was coming like Cancer or something like that. This was an out of the blue, one minute here the next gone type of thing. Apparently and from the best guess from the investigator and coroner they place the time of death Wed. Feb 27 around 12p.m. central. She wasn't found until Sunday morning.

So, as you can guess the phrase "mondays SUCK" took on a whole new meaning for us that day. So Kitten and I meet her sister at the funeral home monday morning to finalize her mothers last wishes then go to her mothers house and try to get a few things in order. She did have a will, she did make final arrangements well in advance of her death so there was not a whole lot to do. So we all agree to meet at the attorney's office at 3:30 that afternoon to go over the will and find out what options we had for everything. Needless to say after we got back to my mom's house we were beat. We had an early supper then an early bedtime.

Now, needless to say Gator and Vol were going to make it to the service and had decided to come in tuesday night instead of trying to play "beat the clock" for the funeral Service Wednesday afternoon. To our surprise though Vol didn't go to work Tuesday and she and Gator headed out and made it to moms house by 6p.m. also needless to say Kitten was very happy to see them pull into the driveway. Now to let everyone know my mom and sister both know about our relationship and very supportive of it. however, they haven't actually seen a lot of affection displayed so i'm not sure of the reaction we would get if say i walked up and gave Vol a kiss in front of mom.

So later that night me and my "full steam ahead" attitude kind of takes over. Mom and Sis was asking where everybody was going to sleep so i told both of them..."mom, sis is gonna sleep with you, oldest son is taking lil sis's room, sons #2 and #3 are gonna sleep in my old room and Gator, Vol, Kitten and I are blowing up the air mattress and sleeping in the living room." Now this is a mom who would not let me and Kitten sleep in the same room when we were not married and she stayed the night with me. Her reaction to all of this...."ok, no problem". So we get all the beds set up and i'm talking with mom and Lil Sis over something and Kitten Gator and Vol lay down to go to sleep. So after 15 minutes i go to the living room and see Gator laying beside Vol. I tell Gator if he wants to sleep next to Kitten I don't have a problem with it. Now the look of shock on his face was priceless at that time. I can tell the thought ging through his mind was "not at your moms house..." so i tell him it's ok, let me worry about mom and if she freaks out or not. I know after thinking about Kitten all day and the hurt she was going through he would really like to hold her while she sleeps. besides, Gator is a bit better with the emotional stuff than I am. So after a little reasoning and persuasion Gator rolls over and pulls kitten up next to him.

Now, the next morning was going to be odd to say the least. I knew it, heck Vol, and Gator knew it. After all as a parent you walk out and see another man laying in bed beside your daughter in law of 13 years isn't something that happens everyday. and on top of that your son is laying next to and holding onto a woman that is not his wife of 13 years. So, what was the first question out of moms mouth...? "what do ya'll want for breakfast?" No bullshiting guys, she was totally freaking cool with the whole thing.

The other TOTALLY FREAKING COOL thing was the fact that Gator and Vol were there to help in a time of need that nobody ever wants to have to help a loved one through. Not saying that nobody would want to help their loved one at this time. but I am sure i speak for alot of people when I say "I don't want to ever see someone I love, hurt as bad as my wife does right now". I can't imagine the hurt she feels right now, even worse this is something i can't even come close to making her feel less hurt about. I can't say "babe, I'm sorry" and make it subside. I can't take her to a movie and make it subside. No amount of kind words or gifts or "talking it out" will make this go away for her.