Just thought that I would post this up to help some of the newer people to see where some of us experienced swingers are coming from and where we have been.

If anyone tells you that they have never had an issue in their relationship while swinging they are full of shit, I’m not saying that everyone has had a big issue but all of us who are in this as a couple have had bumps in the road.

We have had several minor bumps and 2 major hills to overcome. The bumps are just that, bumps, nothing that threatened our fun but nonetheless we had to deal with them. Dealing with the issues that come up in a calm rational way for us at least, is the best way, if either of us feels things are off track we will stop play if we are playing, if we at a party we will pull the other aside to discuss whatever it is that is bothering us.

One of the small bumps was at our first party, the Mrs. Was still lactating and needed to pump her breasts, we hadn’t thought this out, it was too cold to for her to go to the car, so we asked one of the host couples if she could use the hospitality suit. This would have been a fine solution if I had gone with her, but instead I decided to stay at the party and have fun. She went with the male of the host couple and did her thing but she was very uncomfortable being alone with a man she just met, who spent the entire 20 minutes staring at her boobs and distracting her by asking her questions

Another bump was the Mrs. Not communicating to me that she found a certain male unattractive and went through with playtime anyway. After the fact she told me about it and we talked it out and somewhat changed our rules to better accommodate communication.

The biggest bump we had to deal with was too many rules, it wasn’t only our potential playmates that had issues keeping track of them but we did as well.

The first hill we had to overcome was at our third party. The Mrs. Decided that it was okay to have sex with a man that I didn’t not only not know, but contrary to our rules, which was at that time we both play or no one plays. Once again we were able to talk it out and see where things went wrong. We changed that rule for hospitality suites, in that situation it is just too difficult to keep track of what the other is doing, so from then on we were able to play if we found someone interesting.

The next big hill I put squarely on my shoulders. We had started hosting our own events by this time and it just so happened that a party fell on my birthday. During the party several of the women decided that I needed a very special present and they kidnaped me and took me to one of their rooms and gave me a five woman massage and blow job. So I was guilty of leaving the party without telling the Mrs. Once again we were able to talk things out and figure out what the underlying issue was. She wasn’t mad because I had playtime without her or so much leaving without telling her but the fact that I wasn’t there to fulfill my duties as host, leaving her with the work of two.

The moral of this is that even if you run into bumps and hills, open honest communication, listening and hearing what your SO has to say, taking into account their feelings and not being defensive are the keys to long term success in swinging as a couple.

Putting your Significant Other first in all things is the true key to happy swinging!