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The Click... when it works, and when it doesn't
We met and played with two couples over the course of the summer, and it just illustrates that when things are right- Wow! and not.. meh.
We had some health issues and so were on the bench from May to August, but two new couples got in touch with us through SLS (in itself, a miracle- hardly ever happens) and really wanted to meet us, so we had the dinner & drinks routine with both. The first couple were nice enough, we had dinner twice over the summer, made it clear to us they wanted to be good friends, and we played with them finally in August. They are nice folks, but there were a series of small irritations in ordinary socializing that started to add up. And the actual playtime- well, I have no memories at all of it. So, nothing horribly negative, but nothing thrilling either. He kept trying to text me before and after our playdate, and I didn't completely blow him off, but I am not a texter, and certainly not a sexter, and it started to irritate me because when I get texts I feel pressured to respond, but I really don't have the time for that, and it took him too long to figure that out. So, nice folks, but the click is just not there.
The second couple- oh my! Two weeks later, they came and spent the night, and it was wow. Witty, charming, and the sex- yeah. I remember that night.
The wow couple has kept in touch with us, but been too busy to meet, while the meh couple has had more time on their hands. It looks like we're going to be able to manage an MFM this weekend with Mr Wow, which is going to be very nice, and an FMF with Mrs Wow has also been suggested, as their schedules right now make it difficult for all 4 to get together. This makes us very happy. (oh, and texting with Mr Wow not so much of a chore)
The meh couple would like to see us again, too. Mr Meh has been texting PB, starting to ask what they've done wrong that we haven't played again. This despite the fact that we have 2 adult sons moved back in temporarily, PB had the cold from hell for about a month, I've been insanely busy with work and have also had other obligations on weekends. And they know all this. If we have a house party I'd be happy to invite them, but a double date isn't that tempting, and life is too short to fuck out of politeness. And PB keeps reminding me that Mrs Meh is really bi, and would probably like more interaction, but I'm really not attracted to her. Mrs Wow? Oh yeah, I'll do her, although I'm more bi-comfortable than bi-furious.
The take-away from all this? I guess it's that after 6 years of swinging, I'm not interested in ok- it's got to be great. Sadly, sometimes you don't figure out the difference until after playing, and then sometimes the other side has too many expectations. I know we held our breath so to speak after the Wows to see if they'd stay in touch, because we are always aware of the possibility that we'll be the Mehs for someone else. That's life.
In September we also had the pleasure of attending a house party held by old friends of 6 years, and I got to reconnect with one of my favorite partners that I hadn't played with for far too long. When it's great, it's the best, and I'm not willing to settle.
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