itsmrcurious 24 Posted April 14 Hello again. Looking for a bit of advice from you fine people. We've been in the lifestyle for about 10 years, exploring lots of different scenarios in order to find our perfect matches. Dates, parties, clubs, resort takeovers. Mrs Curious is a great people picker and enjoys the spontaneous, social setting. In respect for the sisterhood, she mostly likes to make sure she is connected to the lady even though she isn't really bi. She just wants to make sure there is no confusion over intentions. Because she has such good taste in women, I almost always have a great time - I've had a lot of amazing experiences and connections. The trouble is, she rarely finds that spark sexually with the husband. Often it's physical, sometimes it's mental, almost never is there a real connection. Sometimes she will sleep with the guy because she is having fun in the moment but often feels a bit regretful the following day. We've done single guy stuff occasionally which seems to work OK, but again, she also likes having girls around (plus likes to see me have fun). She's wondering why there is so rarely a mind blowing experience for her? Why are there so often great girls with less great men? How do we find her a truly great time......? Any sharing of experiences or advice warmly welcome x Quote Share this post Link to post
couplers 4,564 Posted April 14 (edited) I really don’t have an answer to your conundrum, but an observation. 1 hour ago, itsmrcurious said: she mostly likes to make sure she is connected to the lady even though she isn't really bi. 1 hour ago, itsmrcurious said: Why are there so often great girls with less great men? It is because women are generally more socially skilled, empathetic, understanding, have better grooming, communicate better, I could go on and on. Which is why I'm glad I have a Lesbian side and two other women in our poly family, not just for sex and companionship, but also to run the household and raise the children. But I/we still love our men and need dick. Women just have to accept that men are lower human life forms in many ways. The path to take is for your wife to first concentrate on finding a couple where the man is a good fit for her, then you just go with the wife of the other couple. Men are far less picky when it comes to having sex. Good luck, and please let me know how it goes. Edited April 14 by couplers Quote Share this post Link to post
AdamGunn2 371 Posted April 14 4 hours ago, itsmrcurious said: We've been in the lifestyle for about 10 years, exploring lots of different scenarios in order to find our perfect matches. Dates, parties, clubs, resort takeovers. As you well know, having been there for a long time, the LifeStyle goes in cycles. They are impacted not only by exterior factors (people available to swing with, Covid, etc.) but also by personal factors. Has your wife gone through life changes lately? Has she had a favorite lover who backed out for some reason? Or a hundred other factors. Take stock, find out what (if anything) has changed, and then change yourselves to compensate. Or, just wait for the merry-go-round to turn again . . . Best of luck. Quote Share this post Link to post
itsmrcurious 24 Posted April 15 10 hours ago, couplers said: I really don’t have an answer to your conundrum, but an observation. It is because women are generally more socially skilled, empathetic, understanding, have better grooming, communicate better, I could go on and on. Which is why I'm glad I have a Lesbian side and two other women in our poly family, not just for sex and companionship, but also to run the household and raise the children. But I/we still love our men and need dick. Women just have to accept that men are lower human life forms in many ways. The path to take is for your wife to first concentrate on finding a couple where the man is a good fit for her, then you just go with the wife of the other couple. Men are far less picky when it comes to having sex. Good luck, and please let me know how it goes. Mrs. Curious likes this comment and that has given us pause for reflection. Thank you for taking the time. Apparently I (Mr.) am more fussy and less willing to take one for the team, so she feels that she has to (although I have repeatedly said that I am OK not to play and on one specific occasion I didn't play and she did with 3 guys ++ we have also had a couple of MFM's). I'm now actively looking for younger hotter guys without particularly thinking about the lady - we'll see where we end up. Much appreciate your feedback here. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post
itsmrcurious 24 Posted April 15 11 hours ago, AdamGunn2 said: As you well know, having been there for a long time, the LifeStyle goes in cycles. They are impacted not only by exterior factors (people available to swing with, Covid, etc.) but also by personal factors. Has your wife gone through life changes lately? Has she had a favorite lover who backed out for some reason? Or a hundred other factors. Take stock, find out what (if anything) has changed, and then change yourselves to compensate. Or, just wait for the merry-go-round to turn again . . . Best of luck. This is also a good point - she turned 50 last year and is still in the evil clutches of menopause - both things have affected her moods / confidence - she's used to being the most desired in any room that she enters and it's hard for her to adjust to the (perceived in her head - she is still highly desired) change. Thank you also for taking the time to respond! 2 Quote Share this post Link to post