Full Swap: What is it?

[LikeMinds321 1,527]

I have always thought full swap meant having intercourse with the people you swing with.

 

Mr LM told me he thought it included giving/or receiving oral with your playmates.

 

What is the definition of full swap?

 

[Denver2some 15]

We agree with you Mrs. LM. If it stops short of intercourse it's still soft swap to us, not full.

[hytril 15]

From everything I have read and been told full swap is switching partners for intercourse. Now to me oral sex right now seem to be a grey area to me. I don't know if it falls into full or partial. Could some of the more experienced people please clear up that issue for me?

[EvilMJ 65]

My own opinion is that full swap is switching partners for intercourse. Everything else is soft swap. I would be interested to see how others feel on this one.

[hotblonde47 22]

Yep, I'm going with the full exchange of partners.

[biblonde 22]

I feel soft swap is oral..kissing...touching...any of those but doesn't have to be all. Full swap is oral and intercourse. Fulling doing everything with the other partner.

[akamgaxoxo 25]

I was pretty sure I understood the definition to be that you were swapping partners for intercourse....and the rest seemed to me to be soft swap.

[Guest Pinmonkey]

I was under the impression that full swap was any touching save kissing and hugging. While soft swap was basically same room sex. We watch you, you watch us. We all get off and giggle over ice cream after.

 

But then I think oral sex is in the same category as intercourse.

[fun_pairTX 26]

I consulted our "book" of definitions (Gave Mrs Fun my opinion and she ok'ed it LOL). Full swap in our book is changing partners for intercourse, anything else falls under soft swinging to us and the few friends I polled.

[hytril 15]

I hate to get into semantics but, If it would seem to me that oral sex falls under the umbrella of sex. If Hard swap is sex with someone that is not your partner then it would seem to me that oral sex would be hard swap. After all the mere phrase is 'oral sex' has the word sex in it. It just seems like there is a grey line here with everyone's definitions on where oral sex should fall. In the end I guess as long as everyone is ok with whats going on it does not matter.

[Guest Mr&Mrs-naughty]

I think there needs to be another term for the middle between soft & full swap. There is too big of a leap from soft swap to full swap.

 

How about mild swap?

 

Soft swap could be anything short of oral sex and intercourse.

 

Mild swap could be everything up to & including oral sex but no intercourse.

 

Full swap could be everything up to & including intercourse and beyond.

 

Sound dumb?

[biblonde 22]

sounds good to me!!!!

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

Typically Soft-Swap is anything short of Intercourse, so I would say that Full-swap is Intercourse.

[sepacouple 15]

Of course if you read the polls they have done with teenagers that are sexually active they say that oral sex is no big deal and definitely not on the same level as intercourse.

 

And then there is our ex-president and his views on what oral sex is and isn't.

 

As for us, I would have to say that while oral sex is significant we would still label it as soft-swap.

 

Just our 2 cents too.

[fun_pairTX 26]

Have spoken to a few more friends and the unanimous decision was that full swap is intercourse with the partner of another, it is like the being pregnant analogy , either you are or you ain't.

[ALilOEverything 901]

To us full swap includes intercourse and soft is anything but. But knowing others could feel that oral is full and not soft shows how important communication is so we don't cross someone's boundaries.

[EvilMJ 65]

To us full swap includes intercourse and soft is anything but. But knowing others could feel that oral is full and not soft shows how important communication is so we don't cross someone's boundaries.

 

That's an awesome point!

[Alura 2,774]

Full swap definitely includes intercourse with the playmates, and oral sex, and petting, and kissing, and... Oh, my! Yes! That's it! UmmHmm! Yep! Yep! Yep!

 

We haven't experienced "Soft Swap" so we don't know what that is...

[good times 991]

Alura said:

Full swap definitely includes intercourse with the playmates, and oral sex, and petting, and kissing, and... Oh, my! Yes! That's it! UmmHmm! Yep! Yep! Yep!

 

We haven't experienced "Soft Swap" so we don't know what that is...

 

Ditto that, except that we have done soft swap before, in fact, soft swap with friends is what got us interested in swinging.

 

It wasn't long until we decided soft swap wasn't that fun unless it is immediately followed by full swap.

[LikeMinds321 1,527]

It wasn't long until we decided soft swap wasn't that fun unless it is immediately followed by full swap.

Here! Here!

 

After swinging only twice we have decided that we would not seek out couples who limited their play to soft swap only.

 

We like intercourse with our playmates.

[Russ 15]

I was under the impression that "full swap" can only be between two couples as opposed to excluding one of the players, another definition I heard refereed to "anything goes" and even another couple implied it refereed to the swapping of body fluids.

 

So "partial swap" implies there are 'restrictions' as to who, where, how.

 

As for 'soft swinging' I always thought it refers to just 'no swap' in the same room...you can watch us and we watch you. I also once heard there was an 'bad' definition for 'soft swinging' where a couple comes to a party just to be a tease, flirt with everyone but then leaves and goes home to party alone...after getting all excited.

[Bu&Sandra 15]

Have to agree that full swap is intercourse, anything else is just a soft swap or as I call it, foreplay.

[jim-n-nicole 15]

Being a car guy, I can't help but point out that in automotive circles "full swap" means replacing the motor, transmission and ECU (electronic control unit) in your car. This usually is done to get better performance from your ride.

 

But now you've got me wondering about the guy who came up with the name "Dodge Dart Swinger" in the late 1960s, early 1970s...maybe the Swinger was created when Dodge did a "full swap" on a regular Dodge Dart!!

[Mistral Wind 54]

I think there needs to be another term for the middle between soft & full swap. There is to big of a leap from soft swap to full swap.

 

How about mild swap?

 

Soft swap could be anything short of oral sex and intercourse.

 

Mild swap could be everything up to & including oral sex but no intercourse.

 

Full swap could be everything up to & including intercourse and beyond.

 

Sound dumb?

 

You got it right Babe! Mild Swap...we like the sound of that. We both agree you have an exact description!

[Chemistry_0518 20]

Rereading the posts brings a question to mind that I had always wondered about.

 

When a single female posts a profile indicating that she is looking for a M-F couple for SOFT SWAP, what exactly does she mean?

[tazzie_n_truck 17]

To us Full Swap would be if we are with another couple and Tazzie is with the husband of the other couple and Truck is with the wife, and when we swap we have sexual intercourse. Not just oral sex.

[Pioneer Swinger 16]

For Angie and I:

 

Full Swap -The husband (or other male(s)) ejaculate inside of Angie. And, I ejaculate inside of their wife/girlfriend. "Ejaculate" in this case means leaving semen inside of the woman.

 

Hope this helps.

[LikeMinds321 1,527]

For Angie and I:

 

Full Swap -The husband (or other male(s)) ejaculate inside of Angie. And, I ejaculate inside of their wife/girlfriend. "Ejaculate" in this case means leaving semen inside of the woman.

 

Hope this helps

I think this is a very important point to make. Thanks.

 

I recently had the experience of my partner not finishing with me - he moved to his wife to finish (one of their rules I wasn't made aware of ahead of time). The play was not as enjoyable because of this.

 

I like it when my partner ejaculates in my mouth or on my body, or in my vagina (using a condom). I realized that ejaculation IS the key word, in my view, of what defines full swap for me.

[2jersey 16]

For Angie and I:

 

Full Swap -The husband (or other male(s)) ejaculate inside of Angie. And, I ejaculate inside of their wife/girlfriend. "Ejaculate" in this case means leaving semen inside of the woman.

 

Hope this helps.

 

We choose to think that 'penetration' (rather than internal ejaculation) is the key aspect which defines full swap. To us, the term 'full' is virtually interchangeable with the word 'intercourse' - and the word 'swap' indicates there is an exchange of partners for sexual activity. In a full swap, an exchange of semen is probably very typical, but not necessary.

[LikeMinds321 1,527]

But how about this scenario.

 

The other woman brings your man to completion with a blow job while you have nearly brought her husband to completion through intercourse, only for him to stop and whisper in your ear that she only allows him to come with her. He leaves you, pulls off the condom, penetrates his wife, and within a minute comes in her.

 

She has just had two men come with her, and you are left without the experience of a man coming in or on you.

 

I hadn't expected this because they didn't share their 'rule' beforehand.

 

Even if they had shared this rule with us beforehand, I think the timing and switching would be so difficult that the play would be less natural and smooth flowing.

 

This is a scenario I hadn't thought about until it happened.

[Chicup 41]

LikeMinds321 said:

But how about this scenario.

 

The other woman brings your man to completion with a blow job while you have nearly brought her husband to completion through intercourse, only for him to stop and whisper in your ear that she only allows him to come with her. He leaves you, pulls off the condom, penetrates his wife, and within a minute comes in her.

 

She has just had two men come with her, and you are left without the experience of a man coming in or on you.

 

I hadn't expected this because they didn't share their 'rule' beforehand.

 

Even if they had shared this rule with us beforehand, I think the timing and switching would be so difficult that the play would be less natural and smooth flowing.

 

This is a scenario I hadn't thought about until it happened.

 

I'd say it is still full swap, just very rude.

 

" she only allows him to come with her."

 

Stuff like this is why we are shying away from newbie couples. I don't view us as sex freaks, but when we decided to do this we decided to do it. Rules were basic, we were soft swap first (all but penetration) but we didn't play little insecurity games. We keep hoping one will be like us, but I swear they want us to romance them

 

Edit: But I do see your point, and the more I think about it, I think you might be correct. Full swap is the whole deal, not just sticking it in.

[2jersey 16]

LikeMinds321 said:

But how about this scenario.

 

The other woman brings your man to completion with a blow job while you have nearly brought her husband to completion through intercourse, only for him to stop and whisper in your ear that she only allows him to come with her. He leaves you, pulls off the condom, penetrates his wife, and within a minute comes in her.

 

She has just had two men come with her, and you are left without the experience of a man coming in or on you.

 

I hadn't expected this because they didn't share their 'rule' beforehand.

 

Even if they had shared this rule with us beforehand, I think the timing and switching would be so difficult that the play would be less natural and smooth flowing.

 

This is a scenario I hadn't thought about until it happened.

 

The scenario which you described has been referred to in the past as a 3/4 swap: She wants to be with others but isn't ready for him to be It is not full swap because one of the swaps was for oral sex only (no intercourse).

 

Your situation has an added twist, of course, because one of the males finished with his own partner. We may get out voted here, but we still believe intercourse occurred. It is doubtful that anyone would argue that a full swap requires that each female have an orgasm with the opposing male - we don't think the standard should be any different for male orgasms.

 

The penis went into the vagina, there was movement of the hips causing friction and (presumably) sexual pleasure. We believe this qualifies as intercourse.

 

More important than the semantics: We agree, LM - an odd rule (such as man only finishes with his wife) should be disclosed beforehand. The last minute whisper in the ear was very bad form - we certainly understand your disappointment.

[Chicup 41]

2jersey said:

We may get out voted here, but we still believe intercourse occurred. It is doubtful that anyone would argue that a full swap requires that each female have an orgasm with the opposing male - we don't think the standard should be any different for male orgasms.

 

The penis went into the vagina, there was movement of the hips causing friction and (presumably) sexual pleasure. We believe this qualifies as intercourse.

 

More important than the semantics: We agree, LM - an odd rule (such as man only finishes with his wife) should be disclosed beforehand. The last minute whisper in the ear was very bad form - we certainly understand your disappointment.

 

I think the issue might be the term full that is the issue. Full to me here would imply you do everything you would having 'normal' sex to its messy conclusion. I know that the standard definition closer to yours, but LM's incident shows that a key aspect (at least to her and other females I would assume) has been withheld, so it wasn't 'full'. I know I'm cleaving rabbits here, but we have nothing to do this Saturday

[2jersey 16]

I think the issue might be the term full that is the issue. Full to me here would imply you do everything you would having 'normal' sex to its messy conclusion. I know that the standard definition closer to yours, but LM's incident shows that a key aspect (at least to her and other females I would assume) has been withheld, so it wasn't 'full'. I know I'm cleaving rabbits here, but we have nothing to do this Saturday

 

So, what term can we use to describe the situation being referenced? Soft Swap?

 

Yes, I got screwed for an hour and had five orgasms - but it was a soft swap because the male didn't cum inside me?

[appleblossoms20 16]

You know it seems like it just boils down to communication. This is why we like a getting to know you phase first. I have found in some cases people have not updated their profiles...you meet and then you assume....they assume....no assumptions can be made. I know it takes some of the "fun" out of it initially but the experience should be pleasurable for all involved or why do it.

[Chicup 41]

So, what term can we use to describe the situation being referenced? Soft Swap?

 

Yes, I got screwed for an hour and had five orgasms - but it was a soft swap because the male didn't cum inside me?

 

Cloitus interuptus

 

Being a man I don't 'get' the whole guy cumming issue, but I've known a lot of women who view it as a great disappointment if he doesn't 'cum for her'.

 

If we were a couple who had that rule, I would most likely still call ourselves 'full swap' though I'd explain the rule afterwords. I think the only debate here is the limit of the label vs. the great variations in sexual play.

 

At least it is more clear with the full swap label then the soft swap one which can mean everything from as little as 'you can touch my boobies through my bra' to everything under the sun but penetration.

[AshNFiona 15]

When we have full swap, it means I and other wife can do whatever we like, and Fiona and the other guy can do what they want to do. Each person gives his/her partner full freedom. If the other wife tells me her hubby doesn't allow this or that, then that's not a full swap. I love to see a guy cum inside Fiona.

[2jersey 16]

...If we were a couple who had that rule, I would most likely still call ourselves 'full swap' though I'd explain the rule afterwords....

 

Chicup, we know this is not your rule we are talking about - but we assume/hope you would communicate the rule 'beforehand', rather than 'afterwards'. This way the couple you are with could decide if your rule is a deal breaker (in which case - "let's not play at all"), or they could, at least, adjust their mindset/expectations in a way that nobody would be left in a disappointed/violated state.

[2jersey 16]

When we have full swap, it means I and other wife can do whatever we like, and Fiona and the other guy can do what they want to do. Each person gives his/her partner full freedom. If the other wife tells me her hubby doesn't allow this or that, then that's not a fulll swap. I love to see a guy cum inside Fiona.

 

Your preference for 'completed' intercourse is valid and normal. Our female could probably adjust to the idea that the other couple had a rule against their male cumming inside her.

 

To turn the tables a bit (and beat a dying horse) - our male would be disappointed if the female would not allow him to cum in her - but he is always happy to rejoin his spouse for the conclusion. (Although this is in no way, shape or form, one of our objectives/rules.)

 

To this point:

When we have full swap, it means I and other wife can do whatever we like, and Fiona and the other guy can do what they want to do.

 

We disagree. "Doing whatever you want', is not the definition of full swap. There are activities, aside from intercourse, that are off limits to many full swap couples.

[Chicup 41]

Chicup, we know this is not your rule we are talking about - but we assume/hope you would communicate the rule 'beforehand', rather than 'afterwards'. This way the couple you are with could decide if your rule is a deal breaker (in which case - "let's not play at all"), or they could, at least, adjust their mindset/expectations in a way that nobody would be left in a disappointed/violated state.

 

I meant it in terms of after we called ourselves full swap not after we played. I was going to edit that but caught it too late

[Alura 2,774]

Quote

 

Like Minds wrote:

 

The other woman brings your man to completion with a blow job while you have nearly brought her husband to completion through intercourse, only for him to stop and whisper in your ear that she only allows him to come with her. He leaves you, pulls off the codom, penetrates his wife, and within a minute comes in her.

 

 

Although we have not played, I've met the lovely Mrs. Like Minds a couple of times and gotten to know her and her exceptional husband.

 

I gotta say, if she had "nearly brought [me] to completion" through intercourse, there ain't no way in Hell I'd have my mind on anything other than HER! It's a damned good thing Mrs. Alura never asked such a requirement of me, 'cause I'd never be able to do it!

 

I can understand how Mrs. Like Minds might be hurt, even insulted. If I had a playmate ready to climax and she said, "Whoa, Cowboy! I have to finish my orgasm with my husband!" she'd never feel me inside her again!

 

I never thought about it before, but I guess "full swap" to us means Mrs. Alura receiving the other man's ejaculate in her mouth or pussy and the other wife similarly receiving mine, simply because that's the way we've always done it. As Mrs. Alura once said, "When I allow a man's cock into my mouth or pussy, I expect, even hope, to drink or receive his come. If I had a problem with that, his dick would definitely not be in there."

 

But keep in mind that we've only had sex with five couples in twenty-five years of playing, and all of them had little or no sexual experience outside their marriages. That might change if we played with couples with more experience who presented a danger of STDs.

 

Shaking my head in wonder.

[Sweet_Candy 54]

Let me get my flame suit on . . . ok I'm ready.

 

Soft swap is everything but intercourse.

 

Full swap includes intercourse with or without ejaculation. Full swap starts soft but it's known from the start the "intent" is to have intercourse with the other partner. Things can happen to delay or stop the progression to intercourse, isn’t that why all parties have veto power? Full swap for us implies the other couple have worked thru the insecurity issues and shares our “intent” to share fully with each other.

[LikeMinds321 1,527]

Alura said:

 

I can understand how Mrs. Like Minds might be hurt, even insulted. If I had a playmate ready to climax and she said, "Whoa, Cowboy! I have to finish my orgasm with my husband!" she'd never feel me inside her again!

 

Shaking my head in wonder.

Mr Alura, I'm so glad you brought this up. I had thought about this situation in reverse - as you've mentioned here - after typing out my reply yesterday.

 

I would think most men would have a similar reaction to yours.

 

What a let down for a man, who has given pleasure to a woman, and observed her rise to near climax, only for her to stop in the midst and tell you she needs to leave you and move to her husband because she is allowed to achieve orgasm with him only.

[WesternSwing 504]

We're in the camp of "yes it was a full swap, but he was really rude". The fact is there was intercourse, in our minds making it "full swap". What if like 2jersey says he pounded away for a half hour giving you multiple orgasms but he never came at all? Would it still be full swap?

 

This has happened with one of my wife's favorite partners, he can screw and screw an screw and never cum, but Mrs. WS can have orgasm after orgasm with him. Sometimes he will finish with his wife. We consider this "full swap".

 

Okay, another scenario. How about if he came and you never did? Is this still full swap?

[2jersey 16]

Okay, another scenario. How about if he came and you never did? Is this still full swap?

 

WS, This is the same question we alluded to earlier in this thread, when we said:

It is doubtful that anyone would argue that a full swap requires that each female have an orgasm with the opposing male - we don't think the standard should be any different for male orgasms.

 

Our answer is: It is full swap if there is exchange of partners for intercourse - orgasms are not required - and the same standard should apply for male and female orgasms.

[LikeMinds321 1,527]

WesternSwing said:

What if like 2jersey says he pounded away for a half hour giving you multiple orgasms but he never came at all? Would it still be full swap?

 

This has happened with one of my wife's favorite partners, he can screw and screw an screw and never cum, but Mrs. WS can have orgasm after orgasm with him. Sometimes he will finish with his wife. We consider this "full swap".

 

Okay, another scenario. How about if he came and you never did? Is this still full swap?

I think what you are pointing out - as I understand it - is whether a man or woman is capable of coming with their partner during intercourse. Some aren't for various reasons: anxiety with a new partner is one, and often for men, the condom takes away his sensitivity which I think is even a more prevalent reason for a man not achieving orgasm.

 

I have no problem with this and it has happened. Even when I climax during these times I know he is allowed to do so as well, should he be able to achieve it.

 

My specific scenario for discussion is when my partner isn't allowed to come with me - even though he is capable of it and is near reaching orgasm, only to have to leave me to finish in his spouse because that is the only way she wants it.

 

What I discovered is that I feel shortchanged when she doesn't have the same 'no come' rule with my husband; it's okay for Mr LM to come with her, but her husband isn't allowed to come with me.

 

I'm not getting Full Swap in this situation. Restraint is in place and it's only on me, not on the other three people.

 

I could have the attitude that if my partner makes me come, that's all I care about, but I too want to have the pleasure - and freedom - of bringing him as well. That's a powerfully erotic moment for me.

 

Let me ask you women: What if you were just about to orgasm with your partner and had to stop at the brink because you weren't allowed to orgasm with him, how would you feel if your husband didn't allow this experience?

 

I'm trying to look at this from all points of view. As I said in an earlier post, this experience with this couple was a first for us. I'm not upset by it, or upset at the couple. I'm glad it happened in a way because it's given me more information to assist us with swinging and will help us avoid this situation in the future.

 

Full Swap can be defined in different ways, what is most important is that both couples are using the same definition when they play.

[Alura 2,774]

Quote

 

Like Minds wrote:

 

Full Swap can be defined in different ways, what is most important is that both couples are using the same definition when they play.

 

 

I think the critical point here is good communication with the couples with whom we play. It's important that any restrictions be discussed beforehand. I know it's difficult to remember to talk about all issues when your minds are on getting the couple in bed, but if a couple has any hard and fast rules, their playmates need to be informed.

[WesternSwing 504]

2jersey said:

WS, This is the same question we alluded to earlier in this thread

Yes, I know, however it hadn't been answered and therefore I felt is was worth reemphasizing... But thanks for not missing the opportunity to set me straight. Surrender

 

LikeMinds321 said:

I think what you are pointing out - as I understand it - is whether a man or woman is capable of coming with their partner during intercourse. Some aren't for various reasons: anxiety with a new partner is one, and often for men, the condom takes away his sensitivity which I think is even a more prevalent reason for a man not achieving orgasm.

 

I have no problem with this and it has happened. Even when I climax during these times I know he is allowed to do so as well, should he be able to achieve it.

 

My specific scenario for discussion is when my partner isn't allowed to come with me - even though he is capable of it and is near reaching orgasm, only to have to leave me to finish in his spouse because that is the only way she wants it.

 

What I discovered is that I feel shortchanged when she doesn't have the same 'no come' rule with my husband; it's okay for Mr LM to come with her, but her husband isn't allowed to come with me.

 

I'm not getting Full Swap in this situation. Restraint is in place and it's only on me, not on the other three people.

I wholeheartedly agree. And I guess that is where I was going with my post which I had to cut short and not explain myself well enough. The point is, it's not whether or not an orgasm occurs, but like in your situation where the opportunity was never there for him. You were short changed. I guess technically you could say that in this experience it was not "full swap", at least not on his and your behalf.

 

We also would pass on playing with people again, who needs that ego bash?

[Tybee Swing 286]

I have always thought full swap meant having intercourse with the people you swing with.

 

Mr LM told me he thought it included giving/or receiving oral with your playmates.

 

What is the definition of full swap?

 

Our definition is very simple. If someone else's penis enters me, and if my husband's penis enters someone else, we're having intercourse with others and we're full-swapping. We think that oral sex with others is soft swing, which we enjoy, too. I go down on women as well - and I feel the bi play is also soft swing.

 

Where the men cum or don't cum - we don't care, as long as everyone's having a great time. We definitely don't believe it's not full swap until there's cum (we believe it's about the penetration and action). In the play sessions we've had, it can go really long, lots of switching back and forth every which way, lots of positions. Hubby and I and the other couple have sex with our own as well as the other. Who knows where hubby's penis will be when he cums? It's all good. Besides, he tends to cum twice in many play sessions, sometimes even more. Last time we played, the other hubby came twice too, once in his wife and once in me (with condom).

 

We haven't run across a couple yet with that rule of "he can only cum in his wife", but if we did, I doubt we would want to play with them.