Women explore more than men?

[BillyandDebbie 301]

Debbie was invited with me to meet three couples at a house dinner party. Two of the couples were already friends, the others were very new to the lifestyle. 
Our play is limited starting with real friends who introduced us to playing and a few others we met over the last few years. 
My observation, men play with women, women play with both. I am comfortable being naked with men and women, I just don’t have and desire to touch, kiss or have sexual contact with another man. No attempts by the other men we met. Conversely every woman including Debbie has gone all the way. I watched Debbie the first time with our friend. She hesitated in most things she did, kissing, getting undressed and the oral and regular sex she had with our friend. The big hesitation came when her girlfriend guided her to touch and then do oral to her. Later Deb and I discussed her feelings. 
At our latest meeting one woman was doing this for the first time while the rest of us became voyeurs. It made me wonder how women handle doing this the first time and why every woman we met has done this. Is it expected in swinging for women to play with the other women? What do women think that first time? Deb said she didn’t think, she did that first time. She had a more difficult time with a woman she met the next time. She told me it’s easier with a woman I was with first. 

[AdamGunn2 393]

With 15 years as swingers, my wife never sought out girl/girl play.  A few - very few! - times a woman would approach her and Mary would let her kiss or perform oral on her. But she never ate a woman out, or started a F/F situation. Many times she would tell the other woman she wasn't interested, one time when the woman wouldn't back away Mary got a little aggressive with her.  It never hurt our swinger encounters.

 

The rule of swinging is the same as that for drinking wine:

    If you don't like what you're drinking, don't drink it.

    If you like what you're drinking, drink more of it.

[Numex 2,409]

We've never encountered this situation. Daniela has been with girls since she was a girl and first became sexually active. All of the women that we have played with since becoming a couple have been bi to some degree, like being eaten out by a woman but not eating other women.

[cplnluv1 871]

I am not the best one to answer, we searched for bicurious women, women who wanted to try something new. A few of the men were curious too, something we had no interest in. 

[ROCKlandCpl 451]

I explored more. During the lockdown we talked about what are we going to do being together 24/7. I can’t remember what brought up swinging it was Rocky started searching swinger sites I think. He found a couple where the woman was bi and asked me if I could do it. 
What I remember was sex with no kissing because of Covid. Rocky and I were excited to do this, secretly I was scared like hell. Looking back I don’t know how I did it but I am happy I did. Why not? 

[couplers 4,614]

On 10/27/2024 at 8:13 AM, BillyandDebbie said:

My observation, men play with women, women play with both.

That the way it just seems to be.

 

On 10/27/2024 at 8:13 AM, BillyandDebbie said:

The big hesitation came when her girlfriend guided her to touch and then do oral to her.

I thought I was totally straight, but what flipped the switch for me was watching my husband David having sex with Clair, one of the few in our early days who let me watch her with David.  I vividly remember still my feelings after he ejaculated in her and seeing his cum in her pussy, my urge to kiss her pussy and get it out of her with my mouth. 

 

Clair started out totally Lesbian before she became bi, so she was up for it.  I was eager, but needed a few lessons before knowing how to be on the giving end of cunnilingus. 

[Numex 2,409]

I'm neither the jealous or cuckold type when Daniela is with another man, whether I'm there or not, but it does gives me some primal, emotional reactions, as does my play with other women. When Daniela has sex with another woman, however, it is a big nothing to me, like her masturbating. Some sexual kick but no real emotions. That's why I don't even consider it when assessing our "firsts" in the lifestyle. I think that this is true for most men, even vanilla guys. Girl play many be arousing, but has zero emotion associated with it.

[couplers 4,614]

On 11/3/2024 at 11:32 AM, Numex said:

When Daniela has sex with another woman, however, it is a big nothing to me, like her masturbating.

I understand your point, but among the women in our poly family, the bond among us women is tighter than with the men, especially since we've had children.  

[Numex 2,409]

On 11/7/2024 at 6:22 AM, couplers said:

the bond among us women is tighter than with the men, especially since we've had children.

Yeah, the women in our closed sex group all trust each other to watch their kids.

[Bob E 11]

I don't think that is true.  My wife, (she passed away), and I were in swinging for 3 years. 

She loved sex with other men with me watching and helping.  She also loved helping me with other women.

But she wasn't open to "exploring", where I was.  (still am)

We loved eating each other after sex with other couples.

But I wanted to explore more sex. 

She would not suck a guy off if I was there.  And I wanted to watch, then kiss her with her mouth full.

I wanted to feel her pussy while she was having sex with another guy, and her feel my cock with another woman.

 

I still want to Explore !  But haven't found a woman that is open to swinging.

And yes, I am Bi-Curious.

[Bob E 11]

On 10/31/2024 at 6:47 AM, couplers said:

That the way it just seems to be.

 

I thought I was totally straight, but what flipped the switch for me was watching my husband David having sex with Clair, one of the few in our early days who let me watch her with David.  I vividly remember still my feelings after he ejaculated in her and seeing his cum in her pussy, my urge to kiss her pussy and get it out of her with my mouth. 

 

Clair started out totally Lesbian before she became bi, so she was up for it.  I was eager, but needed a few lessons before knowing how to be on the giving end of cunnilingus. 

 

[Bob E 11]

Why does it have to be that way ?

If women can suck cocks and eat pussy, why can't men ?

Watching my wife was such a turn on, I would have sucked a cock.

I would suck other guys cum from her pussy, sucking a cock wouldn't be much different.

[AdamGunn2 393]

Bob, I can understand that you'd like to swing with another woman. Are you dating? If so, then you know the trepidation that comes with asking a woman, "Are you interested in sex with others." Since we in ENM are just a fraction of the population, just bumping into such a woman is way against the odds.

 

And being a single man is no picnic. You've got a leg up, I think, in that you'd be empathetic to what the other woman is thinking. But you'd still got to find such a woman (or a couple,) and get through the competition.

 

Would it be possible for you to look up the partners of your past, explain that your wife is no longer with you, and ask if they have any contacts that might want to meet you? You might also wind up getting invited into threesomes, or house parties or such where you can meet eligible women.

 

Good luck.

[couplers 4,614]

27 minutes ago, Bob E said:

Why does it have to be that way ?

I don't know, but that seems to be the way it is.

[Bob E 11]

1 hour ago, AdamGunn2 said:

Bob, I can understand that you'd like to swing with another woman. Are you dating? If so, then you know the trepidation that comes with asking a woman, "Are you interested in sex with others." Since we in ENM are just a fraction of the population, just bumping into such a woman is way against the odds.

 

And being a single man is no picnic. You've got a leg up, I think, in that you'd be empathetic to what the other woman is thinking. But you'd still got to find such a woman (or a couple,) and get through the competition.

 

Would it be possible for you to look up the partners of your past, explain that your wife is no longer with you, and ask if they have any contacts that might want to meet you? You might also wind up getting invited into threesomes, or house parties or such where you can meet eligible women.

 

Good luck.

 

[Bob E 11]

No way to find past partners.  It was in Tenn & Ohio.

I'm in Iowa now -- Quad Cities.

And being male ---- well.   Age too.

But the sex drive is strong.