About to give up

[Fullsackforever 0]

So i am 43 from the North East and after going through a terrible narcissistic relationship that broke me and made lose all my confidence i find myself single. I have no intention of a future relationship im happy to stay on my own. However i have always been adventurous and wanted to explore and tie that in with my adhd which causes hyperarousal i was looking at swinging as a way to move forward and having fun. I was hoping to try groups clubs and whatever may come at me. So i signed up to fabswingers and long story short i have got nowhere. I got close to a bi mmf but the husband didnt like that i was 8 inches. Does anyone have any advice or do i just accept celibacy?

[hunterdonNJcpl 1,479]

My advice is to keep on trying.  Learn and improve as you go.  Lots of couples play with single males.  I'm pretty sure every couple we know enjoys a single male sometimes, and you will see some single guys in the LS get a lot of action.  They understand what works and what doesn't.  Reach out to one of those guys with a ton of certs and learn from them.

Here's one tip: Your 8 inch cock will def work in your favor, but don't make it the main focal point of your profile, and never initiate a conversation with a dick pic.

[Fullsackforever 0]

Just now, hunterdonNJcpl said:

My advice is to keep on trying.  Learn and improve as you go.  Lots of couples play with single males.  I'm pretty sure every couple we know enjoys a single male sometimes, and you will see some single guys in the LS get a lot of action.  They understand what works and what doesn't.  Reach out to one of those guys with a ton of certs and learn from them.

Here's one tip: Your 8 inch cock will def work in your favor, but don't make it the main focal point of your profile, and never initiate a conversation with a dick pic.

Yeah ive tried allsorts with my profile it seems if your new you just dont get a look in thanks for your reply really appreciated

[hunterdonNJcpl 1,479]

i think adopting a positive mental attitude goes a long way.

[Fullsackforever 0]

I did at first but its been a long time trying now

[Numex 2,494]

I think that there would be plenty of women around your age who would be interested in a relationship, sexual and otherwise. 

Importantly, be in good shape and have good grooming and dress.

 

[oldswinger64 126]

I would also suggest, and this may sound odd, that you put less emphasis on sex.  To many women, all men have penises, but it is the personality behind the penis that makes a difference. 

[Numex 2,494]

3 hours ago, oldswinger64 said:

To many women, all men have penises, but it is the personality behind the penis that makes a difference. 

Very, very true.  

[TnA83 328]

Someone said recently that by the time a girl sees your package, she's already decided to fuck you.  What I mean by that is that charm and personality go a lot further than your anatomy. 

[Fullsackforever 0]

People i know comment on my personality that its my best quality, easy to talk to, good sense of humour and someone people like being around. I dont even get the chance to have a conversation. Im based in the UK and im surprised to be honest how hard it is as everyone had to have started somewhere in the lifestyle but dont seem welcoming and friendly to newbies.

[Fullsackforever 0]

i did a while ago get to try a mmf with a bi male but it ended with me being attacked by the male

[hunterdonNJcpl 1,479]

A lot of couples are hostile toward single men and there is good reason for it.  Every couple on this forum has at least one single male horror story.

 

So you're going to get distrust,  hostility and even hate from some couples - and that comes more from their former experiences than anything to do with you.  It's normal, and to be successful you have to have thick skin not be deterred.

 

But you also have to not be the kind of single male that has created all that stigma.

 

If you do this right you will find success.  Look at some of the other single male profiles.  Most get nada yet some guys are crushing it.

[Fullsackforever 0]

Think im going to have to maybe get the nerve up and try a club

[Fullsackforever 0]

Would like to thank everyone for commenting, i tried for advice on fabswingers and its just impossible

[Baconheads 455]

9 minutes ago, Fullsackforever said:

Think im going to have to maybe get the nerve up and try a club

I'm surprised that you haven't tried a swingers club. Playing as a single, that's the first place I tried, with decent success I might add. You mentioned getting the nerve up, girls especially can smell desperation or nervousness a mile away.  Just chill.  Many guys will agree with me that you won't get to play until you don't care whether you do or not.

[TnA83 328]

When elk hunting, go where the elk are!  If you are looking for swinger couples, go where swinger couples have been known to frequent. The ones more serious in finding another couple or especially a solo male are likely to be found at a swinger club. Online hook up websites are fine, but they are hit and miss at best. When the people are right in front of you,  you know they are for real. Your task is not to be the most charming guy on earth, just the most charming guy there that night. Don't forget to make points with the husband as he could be the gatekeeper. 

[TnA83 328]

On 1/7/2025 at 8:17 AM, Fullsackforever said:

i did a while ago get to try a mmf with a bi male but it ended with me being attacked by the male

What did you mean by attacked? Belligerently or sexually attacked? Some couples swing to fill the needs of the bisexual partner and you need to decide for yourself if that's cool or not.