Remembering to be discreet in non-swinger groups

[TNT 1,155]

This past weekend my husband and I attended his annual company Christmas party. After the offical party, a group of us went to a local bar/dance club. While there, hubby and I found it increasingly difficult to remember that we were NOT at a social or swingers club. It had been years since we had been "out on the town" with people who were not in the lifestyle and we seem to have forgotten how to act around "normal" people, lol.

 

We would be dancing and would have to remember not to let our hands wander to places they should not go in a public place, or sitting at the table and talking and have to bite our tongues to keep from saying things we should not say. You know, all those things that are quite acceptable at a social/swingers club.

 

To make it worse, out of the four couples and one single male we were with, all were very attractive and would have been great fun to have really partied with (if you know what I mean, lol). Ted and I were constantly looking at each other throughout the night and busting out laughing because we each knew exactly what the other was thinking.

 

So the question is...Does anyone else have the mildly amusing problem of remembering, in a social situation with non-swingers, that not everyone is in the wonderful world of swinging and that you should act accordingly around them?

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

Almost always. Most of our friends and even some of our family know about our lifestyle and what I do for a living. But when we are around those that don't it does gets very difficult. Leaves little to talk about unless you start making things up.

[danc694u 19]

We catch ourselves like this sometimes. It gets even more amusing when you make an off-hand remark. And we're the only ones that get it.

 

Most of our "straight" friends have learned not to bring up sex with us present. LOL

[walrus0115 15]

Yea, we just got back from Hedo II two weeks ago. When in our local pub last weekend we had mucho trouble censoring ourselves after a full fledged week of debauchery. We had a few friends actually tell us to calm ourselves for fear of us just stripping down and going at it right there.

 

We even made up a new code word. Well, we have our regular code words for when a situation is going to far or too fast (rarely used). So last weekend we made a new code word for when the company is just utterly boring and too prudish.

[Stratecpl 19]

LOL...YES! I have that problem often at the gym especially. When a hunky guy is next to me on a machine or something...it's very hard for me to NOT come on to him like I would a man at a party or social...LOL

 

Ron has this one guy who works out with him sometimes and the last few days this guy who is single, has been complaining about "Not getting any" for a long time...haha Ron has to bite his lip constantly to keep from blurting out.."Well hell come on home with me and Connie'll fix you right up! LOL

[TNT 1,155]

Thanks for the feedback all, I can cancel our therapy session now, LOL. Don't you just love this board and the lifestyle?

[jimcat 15]

Originally posted by TNT:

hubby and I found it increasingly difficult to remember that we were NOT at a social or swingers club.

 

My wife and I had a similiar situation at a Christmas party with non-swingers this weekend. I actually get somewhat bored that we can't get "crazy" as we do at the local swingers club. A conversation started on "most unusual place for sex". I wasn't about to say "in front of 50 people in a group room". Each couple thought their story was wild - if only they knew!

[danc694u 19]

Originally posted by jimcat:

A conversation started on "most unusual place for sex" . I wasn't about to say "in front of 50 people in a group room

 

LMAO... That's why our non-swinging friends never ask to play "Truth or Dare" with us present. They thought it would be cool as hell, the first time :p

 

The games loses all its fun, when you put swingers with non-swingers. But now that we've converted some of them, it might be better now.

[youngswingers 15]

At our favorite local off-premises club Jello shots provide a fun opportunity to lick or be licked. Damned if Pavlov wasn't a genious, because when someone brought out jello shots at a recent non-swinging party we got a little crazy.

[stucazzu 15]

I don't want to seem naive but how will jello shots contribute to licking and being licked? My wife and I were in a dance bar recently and they offered jello shots. It was the first time and we thought it strange. Please tell us. The other people's behavior did not indicate anything different from our behavior. Please give us the low-down.

[youngswingers 15]

At this particular off-premises club jello shots mean ladies getting on the bar and having jello licked off of their breasts. You can imagine that this is a great ice breaker and prelude for fun!

[SnittyKitty 16]

Let me tell you what's fun: To talk about the lifestyle in such a way, you're telling the truth, but nobody believes for a second the stories they think you're making up!

 

We've become really good friends with one couple, and we can talk about anything with them, and I love that aspect of this, but wow, what an adjustment you have to make when you're socializing with your everyday friends.

 

We'd kill to tell her sister & her husband what we do, just to witness the shock, that priceless look on their face. They have told us a zillion times, we don't fit the swinging lifestyle, and it isn't us!

 

And oh how many times can we tell those stories about couples who swear up and down we're a pair of old prudes!

[Alura 2,774]

Several years ago, while resting from the first round with a playful couple we'd just met, I learned that he happened to be the cousin of my snooty, prudish bitch of a supervisor at work.

 

The temptation to go up to her and say, "Hey, Patty Jo, I fucked your cousin's brains out last night! And my husband's magic tongue had his wife climbing the walls!" was almost irresistable.

 

The feeling, "I know something you don't know, Hee, Hee, Hee!" adds a lot to the intigue of intermarital sex, doesn't it?

 

Smiles,

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

Thought this might be a fun topic to bump back up and see if anyone has any interesting/funny stories of times they have forgotten whose presence they were in and said something that perhaps wasn't quite appropriate considering the company.

[OhioCouple 40]

I have to share this.

 

Yesterday we attended a wedding of one of my husband's lifelong friend's daughter. There were approximately 250 in attendance from all around the country, of which we knew about a dozen of them. Of course we all got a little tipsy at the reception which ended at 10:30.

 

We were invited to go to a hospitality room hosted by Gene's friend of which we did attend as did many others that we did not know. Most everyone went and changed into more comfortable clothing before attending. Two of the women (probably 60 maybe even 70 for one of them ) decided to get real comfortable and came in their "sleeping attire" . The ladies feeling somewhat embarassed were joking that they thought it was a pajama party and wonder where everyone else's night clothes were. My husband not thinking speaks up and says "Our evening attire doesn't require a pajama party, we usually just get naked." OMGoodness, I thought I was going to "FAINT" !!! His comment brought out a huge amount of laughter. A laughter that carried on through the brunch this morning in which people were constantly asking us where our pajama parties are.

 

I'm laughing now, but I wasn't at the time and my hubby is thoroughly embarrassed. Never let a man have three scotch and sodas in a mainstream environment if he is a swinger, another lesson learned....

[teknurse 18]

Well, the wife and I are very new to the lifestyle, but we've already run into this. The first time we went out after attending on on-premises swing club, we both kept looking at each other and laughing. The people we were out with are friends we've been out with countless times before, and I think before the evening was over, all of them had commented that something was 'different' about us. They really found it puzzling when the wife and I would sit and point out ppl dancing for each other. Usually women that either one or the other of us might be interested in.

[Roxysbayou 20]

We have experienced the same sort of feelings, lol. We have even established signals to each other to say, Hey check her out? or Do you think they swing?

 

One thing that I have encountered since posting my pictures all over the internet...lol. Is that now I keep getting stopped at the grocery store or where ever by men who swear they know me from somewhere. LOL...they always ask what high school I attended. When I tell them that I just moved here from 1200 miles a way, they get this look on their face. And I am thinking to myself...I know where you've been on the internet...LOL.

[cplnuswing 4,713]

So the question is...Does anyone else have the mildly amusing problem of remembering, in a social situation with non-swingers, that not everyone is in the wonderful world of swinging and that you should act accordingly around them?

It's been known to happen Since we started swinging, we have to watch ourselves to not be too frisky with each other when having vanilla friends over for pool parties or whatever. There's been a few times I can think of when the drinks were flowing that things maybe got a little out of hand.

 

We've also had parties with both swinging and nonswinging friends. Those times everyone was really careful to keep the physical stuff and innuendo in check, but I think when you are swinging friends, it is almost impossible for it not to show that the level of friendship there is coming from somewhere different even if there is nothing physical at all going on.

[Alura 2,774]

Mrs. Alura and I hosted two parties a year to which we invited swinger friends and vanillas. We never had any trouble with discretion. I remember one incident, though, during which Mrs. Playmate was introduced to Mrs. Evangelical, a neighbor who lived two doors down. Mrs. Evangelical asked "How did y'all meet?"

 

"I don't remember..." said Mrs. Playmate.

 

"Mr. Alura and Mr. Playmate met in a bookstore," Mrs. Alura informed her. [True, an adult book store. We were checking our the Swingers Bulletin Board. Pat pointed out a 3X5 card and said "This is ours." I pointed to ours.]

 

"Oh, I remember!" said Mrs. Playmate. "They were both looking for something for their wives." [True. We were hoping to find another man to fuck our wifes. It was good luck that each of us had a wife who was anxious to make that happen.]

 

"They had coffee together and decided to take their wives out for dinner," said Laura. [True. After dinner we swapped.]

 

"We've been friends ever since," said Mrs. Playmate [True. And swapping about once a month.]