Who would you least want to run into at a swingers club?

[Southern Lady 18]

We live in the same town as my Mother and not that my mother would be in a swingers club, but some of her friend might. Who would you hate to run into in a swingers club?

[ALilOEverything 901]

I know I wouldn't run into my mom, maybe my dad when he was alive. I wouldn't want to run into any of their friends though. Running into a co-worker would be cool, we would have something in common and something to talk about But then again I'm always optimistic. I'm going to take my sister to one as soon as our schedules mesh, she wants to try out the scene as a single female, we'll see what happens with that. Who I wouldn't want to run into is patients I've taken care of in the past. That's my fear right there. Maybe that's why we've opted to drive 4 hours the last couple times.

[oncewere 84]

Once we drove over an hour and a half to a party in another town and met our Pastor and Sunday school teacher there... They always drove that far so as not to meet anyone they knew. Surprise! I wrote the story up for our newsletter. If anyone is interested and I can find it, I'll scan it in and post it

[CowboynVixen 16]

We panicked at the thought of running in to family and acquaintances when we first started swinging too, but finally meeting some eased all the issue.

 

We met my wife's female cousin in a unisex change room in a club in Washington. We were both hundreds of miles from family.

 

There was a lot of nervous giggling through dinner, then we went on with life knowing that our secret would automatically be kept from conservative family members as we came to the conclusion we were all in the same boat.

 

Who was going to go back home and tell the family who we found in a swingers club?

 

We still giggle when we meet, and agree, family reunions will never be the same.

 

We have also run into professional acquaintances and the only result was a deeper connection with that person, whether we were a mach or not.

 

We have heard horror stories of workplace outs, but only where there was improper workplace connections already in play, such as a husband and wife introducing one of his subordinates to the lifestyle, then having her go sideways at work and accuse him of sexual impropriety at work.

 

Unfortunately, this does not need to be proven to cost a job.

[Vespertine 31]

I wouldn't mind running into anyone that you have listed as poll options. My parents do not know that we swing, but my family is very open-minded and I can say absolutely it wouldn't be a big deal. Now that doesn't mean I would like to keep company with my parents in an environment like that, but I digress.....

 

The only people I'd feel uncomfortable seeing in a swing environment would be anyone affiliated with my chidren. I wouldn't want to see their ball coaches, teachers, friend's parents, etc.... Or especially THEM (when they're older)!

[biblonde 22]

I don't worry to much about family..most of mine live far away and his wouldn't go there..lol.. My co-workers I wouldn't worry to much about either although I would prefer most I work with dont know about our choices. His co-workers wouldn't be good. Then again they are there for the same reason we are but I worry that some would use it as blackmail against my hubby in the future and with his job that could do lots of damage. I agree with vespertine though anyone that is affiliated with my boys I wouldn't ever want to run into..lol.

[curiouscpl0105k 16]

Yep, I'd have to say #1 would be the parents (more power to them if they want to play but EEWWW!)

 

And then would come siblings and any other family members...again, it's their thing for sure and I wouldn't be freaked out by the fact that they were swingers...it's just something about family members and seeing everything out in the open unexpectedly!

 

Depending on one's line of work. co-workers could be a concern....but I really think that once something like that is out, it can't really be bad b/c BOTH of the people are there for the same reason in the end!

[energizerbunny 24]

I did run into some acquaintances, sorta kinda (not really)...and they were the last people I'd want to see - but for different reasons!

 

 

I ran across their ad on AFF. It was quite creepy for me, since they are the two most ravenously conservative people I know. They both had been in the seminary/convent, and met shortly after having a change of heart -- and have since left the Catholic church because it wasn't conservative enough! ha!

 

Anyway...he has few hygiene skills to speak of, and I shudder at the thought of them. Hate to be so blunt, but truthfully they're the only people I would say such things about. Seeing their ad made me cringe. Ew!

 

Now I'll know to avoid any clubs that might be near my hometown if we choose to go to them in the future, for fear of running into them! Ack! I would RATHER see my parents there than these two!

[intuition897 2,179]

Tough one. We'd hate to run into any of them. Running into family is just... gross, and running into your coworker or boss can potentially have some serious repercussions, but at least, unlike your neighbour, you don't have to live next door to them. I'd worry that they'd get the idea that, just because of the proximity, there might be some interest. Or that just because they now know us as 'one of their kind' suddenly we're all best friends or something, always dropping by unannounced, making thinly veiled 'inside jokes' in the presence of our other neighbours. Hey, we're unashamed of what we do, but whether or not we 'out' ourselves is something we'd like to maintain control of, TYVM. It's one of the reasons we tend to NOT swing locally.

[FlyBiNiter 16]

Well, mine isn't one of the choices.... I'd hate to run into my ex-husband. Gross... can't stand him !! As it turns out, that's why we don't go to the club anymore. He IS a member, so for me the possibility is very strong that we would encounter him there. Yuck. I only found out he was a member because I saw his ad on the club's website. Haven't been back since, although I have kept our membership up to date just in case he ever falls off the planet.

[xxoticangel 99]

Both of us have run into coworkers at swing clubs. Mine (male) was getting a blow job from his wife in the couples area when we walked in. Nothing was ever said about it. Her's was in a crowd standing watching while she and another girl were doing a public show. My former supervisor, still works at the same place, has an ad on SLS.

 

Our opinion is if we see someone at a swing club we are all there for the same reason and they don't want anyone to know any more than we do.

[VegasLee 1,486]

We are very open about our lifestyle so we don't worry about running into anyone but we have had two funny experiences with people at the club we host at.

 

Two different times our oldest daughters (in their twenties) have shown up at the club when we where there. They both know that we are swingers and they know that we host at this club but they thought they where showing up on nights that we where not there.

 

Each time we spotted them before they saw us and we just sat at our table waiting to see what they would do. Once they noticed us they would avoid us for about a hour, them staying in area's of the club that we where not in. Finally they would come over to our table because they knew we had seen them.

 

The funny part would be that after they left our table we would get guys/couples coming up to us asking us if we knew "the hot girl" that was at our table. The best part was the reaction on their faces when we told them it was our DAUGHTER!

 

I am glad that we have a great relationship with our kids though and that they can come talk to us about things.

[bear_n_bunny 43]

I think the only real problem we might have in meeting someone we know at a party would be if it were a parent. However, this is not very likely...

 

It so happens that I did have something like this happen a time or two. First time was at the second party I ever attended (this was with my first swing partner, an ex-fiancee, not Bunny). Before we left, my swing partner asked me "What if we meet someone we know?" I replied "It's not very likely, and besides, what can they say? "What are you doing here?"".

 

Anyway, we get to the party, and not ten minutes after we arrive, another couple shows up, and damned if my ex did know her, and in fact had had lunch with her just a couple of days before (they were both members of a group that had absolutely nothing to do with swinging in any way). Needless to say, all were suprised, albeit pleasantly, and we ended up having many pleasant interludes with that couple.

 

So if it's an acquaintance, friend, co-worker or whatever, it's not really a concern with us. Again, what can they say?...

 

-- Bear

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

None of the above. If they are there, they are there for the same reason I am. If it was a parent.... 1. I know there's no way in hell that my mom would show up at one... and 2. If I were in the same town with my dad and ran into him at one, I would leave just as I would if I ran into him anywhere.

 

Anyone else and I would greet them and treat them as I would any other time. I just don't get what there is to fear in those situations.

[bill&sabrina 22]

I am only speaking for myself (Bill), but none of the scenarios would bother me. I would leave an event if I saw my father at a swing function. I am like Julie though, and leave every event I run into my father. I share Julie's attitude, and just can't see why people are scared of seeing someone they know swinging. Why is it that when sex is brought into the mix, we are suddenly uncomfortable around comfortable people.

[invisibletouch 15]

For us it would be our son & daughter in law!! Now that would be a disaster!!

[nusofties 52]

Any family members would be disastrous. Other friends, acquaintances, professional contacts, the cashier at the supermarket would be OK unless they wear the "lifestyle" on their sleeves and aren't discreet about seeing us. Question: has anyone ever been "outed" by formerswingers who have "reformed", in an attempt tosaveyou?

[De and Ci 19]

A lot of paranoia being expressed here. What if you ran into a family member, co-worker or parent? Are you going to start screaming and run out of the club like your ass is on fire? I ran into one of our company's executives at a swinger's club. He saw me first, approached me, greeted me and shook my hand. I was a little suprised to see him, but he said "hey, what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas". No big deal, Later in the evening, He and his wife came and sat at our table for awhile. I know if I ran into someone I knew and they started acting all freaky-I would be very irritated! Again, remind yourself that they are most likely there for the same reasons as you.

[inbeachcouple 15]

Parents? Co-workers? BAH !!!! By far the last person you'd want to run into would be a grandparent. Awwww, can't even believe I let the image into my head. Okay, time to go throw up........(GP's are in thier 90's)

 

I know, like Julie said, they are there for the same reason, but the last thing I want/need to see is mine/wife's grandparents half naked, or being explicitly sexual.

[BiloxiCouple 695]

We have run into several people we know in a swingers club. The fun part is the look on their face when they realize they know someone! Especially if it is their first time. We always take them to the side and let them know we would never let anyone know at work or wherever that they were there.

 

I have taken my mother-in-law when she came into town to the local club. She doesn't swing, but she is a cool mother-in-law.

 

At my birthday party (March 9th this year) I invite almost everyone at my work to come. They know where it's held at. Last year we had 35 people from my work. This year expecting even more.

[WvCpl4Fun05 15]

I think running into friends of parents or friends of close relatives would kill the moment for me. We all know we are there for the same reason but still... haha

 

We are very conservative on what we do. Some family knows that we are in lifestyle and some of our close friends but NOT THE PARENTS haha, And plus I couldn't even imagine some of my parent's friends umm EEEWWW NOOO haha

[rounder 17]

I find it interesting that (according to the poll), more people are uncomfortable with the thought of running into a co-worker than with a brother or sister. Guess I shouldn't be...we have to interact with fellow workers on a daily basis...and some of them might not be as close-mouthed as a sibling. Not interested in family members myself (although I did get to sleep in the same bed with a female first cousin when I was 11 years old & she was 12..."spooned" with her and rubbed her belly but stopped short of exploring upstairs or downstairs...although I got the distinct impression that she wouldn't mind), but probably that's because I had no sisters & only the 1 female cousin. I do enjoy reading fictional incest stories and have enjoyed reading some of the "close encounters" among siblings posted on this site (usually same-room/same car/in-the-dark encounters but not together). However, I would have to think that there must be a few swingers who--if the situation was right & they had a close relationship with their sibling--would actually participate in and even enjoy a swap involving their brother or sister.

 

As I said, I am not attracted to brother (ugh!) or sister-in-law although when I was a teen I was attracted to my future wife's older sister...and I do have a grown niece in her late 30's who is really hot...and who gives long, lingering, close hugs...damn her eyes for being such a tease! I also wonder if any women here are attracted to their fathers-in-law and fantasize about them. Or if any men here would permit an encounter between their wife and father...especially if father was divorced or widower?

 

Sorry...this probably has little to do with the topic at hand...and most swingers are most likely turned off by the idea of incest (and those few who aren't probably aren't telling!). Guess I'm just a deviant for vicariously enjoying the prospect of consensual encounters between adult relatives.

 

And I do agree...sexual relations between close relatives WOULD have the potential for making holiday dinners awkward.

 

BTW...current fantasy involves a single (divorced & not looking for remarriage)coworker who is close friends with both me and my wife...we often do things together (traveling to cultural events, concerts, hiking, etc.) and she sometimes stays overnight at our house...she is very comfortable giving/receiving backrubs, touching, etc. with both of us...and we often joke about sharing a bed.

[PlayM8s 15]

While at a swing club a few years ago, ran into neighbors who live 4 houses away. Just so happened to have swung with them that very night. Regularly see them around town, in the supermarket, gas station and walking their dog. We laugh at ourselves knowing that we know what they look like naked! We exchange friendly hello's and such. Small world!!

 

No harm in running into neighbors!

[wiscpl 22]

Interestingly enough we found out her cousin swings through this board back when Julie had swingers ads on this site. We didn't go any further of course but we do exchange the occasional looks that say we know what you're doing.

 

We don't attend clubs very often but if we did run into a co-worker or a neighbor we wouldn't find ourselves heading to highlands. The are obviouesly there for the same reasons as we are. Circumstance would determine whether we played with them or not.

[lauragirlchat 16]

We are very open about our lifestyle so we don't worry about running into anyone but we have had two funny experiences with people at the club we host at.

 

Two different times our oldest daughters (in their twenties) have shown up at the club when we where there. They both know that we are swingers and they know that we host at this club but they thought they where showing up on nights that we where not there.

 

Each time we spotted them before they saw us and we just sat at our table waiting to see what they would do. Once they noticed us they would avoid us for about a hour, them staying in area's of the club that we where not in. Finally they would come over to our table because they knew we had seen them.

 

The funny part would be that after they left our table we would get guys/couples coming up to us asking us if we knew "the hot girl" that was at our table. The best part was the reaction on their faces when we told them it was our DAUGHTER!

 

 

How would you feel about people coming over to your table and talking about how much they had enjoyed fucking "the hot girl", or of women saying they enjoyed a 69 with "the hot girl". Or a man saying "the hot girl" loves anal, have you had her.

 

I think that is why meeting family at a swinger event is fraught. People talk openly about sex, and some of the conversations you had that night (without you knowing) must have concerned your daughter.

[ShellyM 0]

You know, I thought of this before we went to a club last Sat. Not that I would run into family, because we live about 30 miles from the club. But that I would run into fellow co-workers lol, because Austin is a big city. It didn't matter to me though....if they are in the club in the first place (and the cover for clubs in Austin are like $50 per couple) they must want to be there, and are at least curious about the lifestyle...so its no big deal. I think that at least 80% of married couples are at least curious, but too scared or embarassed to say they are curious.

[flkeyscouple 21]

I, much more than my husband, was raised in a very religious, conservative home. I would never run into my parents or my siblings - they would never be there, although I don't think they'd be too terribly surprised that I - the black sheep of the family - would be there. Not happy, but not surprised. However, running into friends of my folks or friends of my siblings would be very uncomfortable for me. I know the 'if they are there it must be because they swing too' but that doesn't make me any more comfortable.

 

Because of this 'fear' on my part, we do not attend swingers clubs anywhere near our parents/siblings homes.

 

But, because of the same 'fear', I am always worried about running into coworkers too. So no swing clubs or home parties in our home area either!

 

I know - suck it up and deal with it - I keep telling myself that, but it doesn't do any good! I was raised WAY TOO conservatively and it just hasn't worn off completely yet!

 

Sarah

[sunrise_sunset 16]

I ran into a co-worker at the second swinger party we ever went to. We just laughed it off, our little secret......

 

Ms. Sun

[curiousagain 326]

I ran into the parents of one of my Children's friends at a group meet and greet one time. They seemed pretty uncomfortable at first but soon realized I didn't have a problem so they didn't either. They don't play with SM but when I see them out they give me a "knowing grin" now. At another, I saw a couple that the man and I knew through business and he seemed very uncomfortable with it while his wife didn't have a problem.

 

Personally, if I run into someone I know at a meet and greet or social, club, whatever I wouldn't mind, since they are there for the same reason. It's the ad site I am on that worries me a little as you don't have to be in the lifestyle to go there and look at photos and where I work would not be tolerant at all as evidenced by past history.

[2inthemood 15]

As told in other posts co-workers would be the problem for us, that could not be a good career move for her and for me i just need to keep life and work completely separate in order to survive without stressing myself and the people around me (even two cellphones numbers, one for work and one for the rest and the work one is off out of work hours).

 

The rest of the people wouldn't be a big deal since if they are there they can understand it.

[SandB 15]

We look at it this way, whomever we run into at a swingers event is there for the same reasons we are - to have fun. I have run into many people I work with and only one had a problem. It seems he was embarrassed to be seen by me (but not my partner) in the skimpy bathing suit he was wearing and did not want to be seen having sex with anyone. Now granted he was in his mid 20's and still rather shy about the lifestyle I can only assume either he has improved in his attitude or is no longer in the lifestyle. I am not interested in seeing either my parents or the parents of my friends at a club or house party.

[Tia Vampire 167]

Our children. Even though our children know that we swing, we would not want them to see just how freaky mommy and step- dad really are.

[roadkingklp 15]

We certainly understand no parents or their friends. My ex was involved in one particular group session at a swing club, she was into the scene and did not know she was with who she was finishing a B.J. on. It was a guy she worked with and did not like. she told me she liked his equipment and load, but he was a real jerk in the office, especially since his wife did not know he was at a swing club and not on a Government TDY trip. That was the Cottage, and from that time on she paid full attention to the players in the sessions.

[Chitowndk4u 32]

I wouldn't want to run into co-workers or parents, siblings I wouldn't care about too much.

[HappyCpl 89]

An old flame or -ex.....

[EroticImaginati 16]

I (Mr. Erotic) has to say any member of our family would probably make us a little uncomfortable... not because of what they may see or finding out about us, but we wouldn't want to see my 60 year old Uncle Larry getting it on.

 

As far as the others go, we have actually taken coworkers, neighbors, and family friends with us to clubs. What is the point of having hot friends if you can't have some fun with them?

[celtic239 297]

I just recently told a swinger friend that the reason we don't play locally isn't because we might run into someone we know and like but rather people we know and don't like. I guess that's why I voted siblings - they could ruin a wet dream.

[junglecouple 127]

At The Jungle, we used to have an odd situation. Mr. and Mrs. "X" came, were fun, and informed us that their DAUGHTER was planning on attending in the near future. Well... that near future arrived and lo and behold, the Daughter was a FOX!!! Pretty young compared to the regulars, but more mature than most of them. They (she and her parents) made it a point (by pre-arrangement) to never come to the same party.. She said.. "well, that would just be weird!!"

 

Turned out she was 20ish.. spoke 5 languages, rode motorcycles, and had been a world traveler pretty much since birth, so was very mature for her age. I asked if it wasn't uncomfortable being at a party where the average age was twice hers and her response was: "I find most people my age are boring and self absorbed"...go figger!!!

 

Also, many many folks came here from out of town.. during discussions the same, recurrent thought, came up. Folks from the local area went to Dallas, San Antonio, Houston because they were concerned about running into folks they knew if they partied in the home town...

The irony is that by going "out of town" they had a bigger chance of running into acquaintances then if they just came here. It was not uncommon for out of towner's to run into folks they knew because they also, were concerned that going locally, they would meet someone they knew. So... it seems the best thing for all of them was to party locally.

[Tina and Bob 236]

We wouldn't want to run into family friends or folks we have strictly a business relationship with.

[dpbklyn 9]

For us, it would be our son. Our son would be horrified, daughter not so sure.

[todesireu 16]

Top of the list is ex-wife. After that any other family members.

[billanderin 18]

I would say - my parents. My husband would not have a problem with it but I would feel weird about it. We did attend one party where one of our daughters and son in law were there. Awkward at first but we all had a good laugh and we all enjoyed the party.

Erin

[km34 672]

I would always warn my sister and bro in law when we would be going to the club so that they wouldn't choose that night to go. As far as I know, they still haven't put in an appearance, but I did NOT want to risk the awkwardness - particularly for my sister who is rather shy. I wouldn't be upset if we would have seen them, though, I think it would have been hilarious.

 

Top of my list, though, would be my parents. For sure. Or hubby's parents who I could actually see going.

[latin2012 22]

Anyone I work with. A few times I have run into a doppelganger of a co worker and I feel like my heart is stuck in my throat.

[cupl4fun 361]

I think in general we might take a different view toward this than most as we would either choose neighbor or co-worker. Initially the thought of seeing your parents or other family members in a swing club might sound a little freaky, but for us it would mean that we were right and they were wrong. We could never pass up an opportunity to say "told ya so!" LOL After the initial "told ya so" moment we would probably honestly be excited to see some of our family members shedding their religious dogmas (no euphemism intended, we wouldn't want to actually "see" them do anything ) With neighbors or co-workers though, we have found that people who know we swing tend to think we fuck everybody and so they think they are gonna "get some". The potential for a weird dynamic with a neighbor, or co-worker whom we were not attracted to at all is way scarier to us.

[CentTex77 104]

I actually ran into a married couple who were both co-workers at a club once. I was at the club with a long term FWB that I used to play with. I wanted to party with the other couple because the woman was (and still is) incredibly attractive. Unfortunately my FWB was kind of nervous about new people (she wasn't a swinger per se, just an open minded friend and this was her first club experience) and it turned out that the other husband didn't want to share her with me. I don't know if he thought it would make work awkward or what but it never happened. Sad thing is that I had another chance to hook up with this lady after she divorced her husband and we'd both left the company at which we were co-workers. But my wife had dropped out of swinging at that time and I didn't want to make things strange at home by playing on my own.

[prairieshadows 95]

For us it would be fellow workers. We'd feel really uncomfortable about it. As far as parents and siblings go, we know they are not in the lifestyle, and parents friends....Bryan's mom passsed away last year, but their friends are older and most likely not in the lifestyle. And Alicia's mom's friends...probably not as well.

[beardedone 50]

Would not be concerned about a co-worker. *They* are there, too, so who are they gonna tell?

 

My actual least desire would be to see an -ex!

[Sensualbicouple 122]

We actually ran into one of my ex boyfriends at a club....I was awkward as hell. We all kept our distance that night. :-)

[lizard-lix 32]

A bunch folks in the office are 'out' to each other (we are incredibly lucky, 4 pervs in an office of just over 20, and a few more who are vanilla but cool with us). We have even met up at the fetish night at the cub, so with them it is a good thing. We haven't played and not sure if we ever might, but they are great friends and tons of fun to be with..

 

OTOH, one other coworkers who was part of this bunch, would probably motivate me to call it a night. When that person's position got elevated, the rest of us got 'left behind.' The awkwardness would just ruin it for us.

 

Anyone else? Who cares? If they are there for the same reason we are, neither can rat out the other without outing themselves as well, so live and let live. (That said we live a 1000+ miles from any relatives, Lizardess would rather die than have any of her family know about our kinks, I'd tell them just to get it out and over with).