Swingers Wedding

[intuition897 2,179]

It's obvious to me that swingers as a group tend to take their marriages very seriously. It's something we work hard at and are very proud of. Some people collect stamps, work hard at it, and are rightfully proud of their collection. A swinger's hobby is his or her marriage.

 

Being only 19 at the time, I barely remember my wedding vows. I know that I meant them, but I don't think I could recite them word for word. Since those early years Mr. intuition and I have redefined our marriage and remade it over into our OWN creation, not just the cookie-cutter traditional marriage that's neatly packaged and just like everyone else's. While traditional wedding vows are beautiful when the speaker means them, I've always hated conformity "just because" it's expected. A few people mentioned in a post earlier today their wedding day, their vows and their experiences...

 

I am curious: Did you have a traditional wedding? An 'alternative' wedding more suited to swingers? Did you write your own vows? Did you do something really bizarre or unique for wedding day? Or did you renew your vows to better suit your 'new' marriage? If you could rewrite your vows now, what would you say (no holds barred)? If you could redo your wedding, what would you do differently? These are just some questions to get you started. I'm very interested in hearing back from everyone.

[DBL D 120]

Looking back on it (and I sorta felt this way at the time) I wish we'd left out the part about "forsaking all others", but you are right, time goes by and as long as you and your SO agree on what is important to YOU then I say it's cool.

 

Male D

[oncewere 84]

The most unique swingers wedding I remember was at our club chapter in Florida in the early 1980s. There were a dozen or two people there. The men wore black ties (only) and the women wore flowered hats and gloves (only). The bride did wear a veil. At the end of the ceremony the person conducting said "You may now fuck the bride" and they consumated the marriage right there. Then for the receiving line all the guests got to screw the bride or the groom briefly before it turned into an orgy. They had a more traditional wedding for the family a few days later but the ceremony at the club is what everyone remembered. My wife and I wrote it up for the club newsletter.

[Alura 2,774]

What a hoot, Oncewere!

 

We thought our wedding was unique, but we can't compete with that one!

 

We wrote our own vows and did leave out "forsaking all others." The only person who noted its absence was Mrs. Alura's mother.

 

We rented a suite in the Camelot hotel, which was one of the castle turrets. It was three-level, the bedroom at the top. The middle level was a bar and the lower level a dance floor.

 

Mr. Alura is 5'3" and Mrs. Alura is 5'9". Since we first met we've kissed while Mr. stood on the stairstep above. We descended the stairway from the sleeping loft, kissing on each step, since there was no aisle to walk down.

 

We knelt facing each other on a flokati rug we'd gotten in Greece, exchanged our vows and gave each other gold hearts to wear on chains around our necks. (We couldn't afford rings.) The guests stood around us in a circle holding hands and participating in the ceremony. They, in unison, pronounced us man and wife. Unfortunately, they were not swingers, although that may not have been true of the "minister."

 

Later, we made love on the wedding altar. It was Valentine's Day.

 

Alura

[Chris&Suzanne 204]

We were married at Hedonism II in Jamaica. We wore clothes, and so did our guests, but because it was outside, many of the paser-byers we nakied.

[Greg & Sheryl 368]

Although it didn't break out into an orgy, we had an all-swingers wedding a couple of years ago. It was a small gathering at home with three couples and one single female as our guests (no family attended). The champlain who performed the ceremony was the only non-swinger in attendence! The basic theme of our vows was how we each considered the other to be our best friend. That theme is still valid, today.

[Vespertine 31]

The basic theme of our vows was how we each considered the other to be our best friend. That theme is still valid, today.

That's the best kind of marriage to have.

 

I always get the warm n' fuzzies when I read your posts. Just looking at the pic of you two makes me smile. You both truly look very happy.

[Greg & Sheryl 368]

That's the best kind of marriage to have.

 

I always get the warm n' fuzzies when I read your posts. Just looking at the pic of you two makes me smile. You both truly look very happy.

 

It's so sweet of you to say that! Thank you very much!

[EvilMJ 65]

We didn't have a 'swingers wedding' but it was pretty different than what my family is used to. We had it in the back yard, everyone was expected to be VERY causal (my brother in law was in jean shorts) and we had a open bar the whole time.

 

The minister (on his own, thinking he was being funny) added in that I was single during hunting seasonl..... maybe that's what started it all....that's it the minister made me do it!!!

 

 

 

Wait..I also have two photos of my neighbour and my brother in law wearing table clothes as togas. In one of them she has her hand on his crotch and they were kissing....Hell maybe it was a swingers wedding after all

[Vespertine 31]

Wait..I also have two photos of my neighbour and my brother in law wearing table clothes as togas. In one of them she has her hand on his crotch and they were kissing....Hell maybe it was a swingers wedding after all

Well, whatever kind of wedding it was, it certainly sounds like it was fun!

[northindycpl 32]

We had a fantastic wedding, but like you I was so young, that I do not think I understood the magnatude of my vows. I also didn't understand that my actual life would be so different than what I pictured on that day. I have often thought about doing it again. And I am not sure what I would do differently, other than spending money on ourselves, instead of a big ta-do. I think now, I would have rather take all the thousands spent, and celebrated us, and only us.

 

With vows that represent who we are.... Stuff like Do you promise to love your wife when she is hesterical about a bad dream? And.... Do you promise to love your husband after the 4000th time the socks are on the floor?

 

It would be great!

[TNT 1,155]

OH MY GOODNESS...LMFAOOOOO I just blew coke out my nose.

 

Teresa

[intuition897 2,179]

Mr. and I had a very small-town-old-fashioned wedding, where some of the gifts were contributions to the wedding itself (like my Aunt making wine for the dinner, a friend doing our flowers and another friend offering her services as a professional caterer). It was very sweet, but it was something that was a creation FOR us by our community. The vows and ceremony were by the book, as is prescribed by a strict Anglican upbringing.

 

I've dreamed of winning the lottery and flying our family and close friends (vanilla and swinger alike) to some lovely tropical paradise where we can renew our vows at sunset on the beach, with our feet in the sand, flowers on our heads, and lit by the glow of torches. White cotton would be the dress code. Our vows would be pure and simple, promising to one another in the presence of our loved ones and God, that we will always do everything in our power to be a blessing on one another, and never a hindrance. To always tell the truth, even when it's hard to do. To do the right thing, no matter what. To always put one another's happiness before our own. To love selflessly. To give of ourselves and our time generously. To cherish each other, and recognize that every moment we have together is a gift, not a right, and not a burden. And promise to respect ourselves enough to give each other the occasional 'kick in the ass' as necessary (figure of speech!) if one of us oversteps his or her bounds. This kick in the ass also applies to the deterrence of self-defeating or self-destructive behaviour. If I see my husband doing something obviously bad for him or for us, it's my responsibility to speak up and stop him.

 

There are so many things we've learned on the way. I'm sure there were a few people who said we'd never make it. Wasn't it obvious? Marrying so young, pregnant, etc. Yet here we are. I actually feel sorry for a lot of married people out there now (not wanting to sound arrogant or condescending...). I've fantasized about renewing our vows for a long time now, because I want to do something significant to show Mr. just how I feel about him. And I also want to show our family and friends just how our relationship has evolved. I really want my Mom to know that I've found true love (Yeah, I'm a hopeless romantic)

[DBL D 120]

Not so sure, Ves... but it had potential there for a moment!

 

Male D

[intuition897 2,179]

OMG!!! LMAO! That last post popped up while I was composing my latest "novel". Great for a swingers wedding indeed. Now, of course it depends on who reads that sign. For those of us in the know, it still holds true, but for ENTIRELY different reasons. My Mom, however, would solemnly nod and say, "Yup, that's so true!" (I think she was brought up in perhaps a more sheltered social circle).

[Vespertine 31]

There are so many things we've learned on the way. I'm sure there were a few people who said we'd never make it. Wasn't it obvious? Marrying so young, pregnant, etc. Yet here we are. I actually feel sorry for a lot of married people out there now (not wanting to sound arrogant or condescending...).

We feek the same way about our marriage.

[looking2swing 17]

I think that it would be great to have a swinger wedding. We had a shotgun wedding with no one there except for our best friends. It was small but sweet. But it would to be married wearing nothing but a veil, save some money!

[NekkidHedonists 15]

Hubby and I had a plain ol' boring wedding... 150 closest family members and friends ("welcome to our wedding.... and you are????") .... So we decided that it's time to do it for real. We can't wait to renew our vows at Hedo on our 5 yr anniversary this June! This time we're writing our own vows and celebrating nekkid in a hot tub.

[NotsoNew 17]

When we got married we were not swingers. But we did have kind of an unusual wedding - we got married in a bar. Guests were standing around with drinks in hand while we exchanged our 5 minute of vows. I found the minister in the yellow pages.

 

What I loved about our wedding is that it was so low key. My dress cost $50.00 that I found on a sales rack in a regular store, my brother cooked our food and we had a cheesecake wedding cake, everyone was very relaxed and a good time was had by all.

 

We are planning on renewing our vows in Dec 05 at Hedo II with a bunch of great friends.

[ALilOEverything 901]

We had a traditional wedding, much to my dismay. It was important to my husband though so I went with it but it always felt so generic. I wanted to get married in the campground where we met and I didn't want a religious ceremony. I later found out he just wanted to please his parents and that is now something we both regret. Our marriage now has nothing to do with pleasing our parents, we are about what we want for our marriage.I would love to renew our vows with new ones that is more tailored to our marriage. We've talked about renewing them when we hit the 10 year mark (2.5 years to go) but that almost feels to soon now. It seems like it's always redefining itself as we develop and mature and gain more life experiences together.

[intuition897 2,179]

I would love to renew our vows with new ones that is more tailored to our marriage. We've talked about renewing them when we hit the 10 year mark (2.5 years to go) but that almost feels to soon now. It seems like it's always redefining itself as we develop and mature and gain more life experiences together.

 

Dito to that! Although our marriage underwent a dramatic change a couple of years ago; we'd been coasting along 'settling' for things rather than making our marriage into the thing we wanted it to be. When things finally came to a boiling point, we decided rather than going our separate ways, we would turn our relationship around. We really did love one another...a lot!...but until then we really had no idea how to show it. It's so wonderful when you finally 'find' one another.

[xxoticangel 99]

We married on a Saturday evening. Our original intent was to leave the reception around 9:30 and go to a local swingers club, consumate our marriage in front of 100 or so witnesses then party the night away and catch the 7 am flight to Hedo. Our plans went south when the reception was "crashed" by invited but unexpected members of my swat team. We ended up drinking and till 4 am then being poured into a cab for the ride to the airport. I still think the idea or "You may now fuck the bride" is awesome and the receiving line would be something else altogether.

[JakenReenie 17]

OK, Reenie and I claim to be the latest authorities on this subject cuz we just got married last month, after 16 years of being together.

 

It wasn't a swingers' wedding although 3 swinging couples were there, and a new recruit was found ....... and therein lies the tale.....

 

We did a sit down dinner for 50 people in a nicely restored old inn in town here. One of our swinging couples was seated at a table with a single woman who is more of an acquainance than a really close friend and how she even came to be at our wedding is a tale in itself. In any case, she asked Bob how he and his wife knew us. Bob muttered something about meeting though mutual acquaintances years ago. She kind of pressed him on it and eventually he, being under the influence of one too many Manhattans, just blabbed the whole story. Not only was she fascinated with the whole concept, she wants to be invited to our next party.

 

I was horrified when I heard what happened, not only because he told her everything but my sister was sitting at the same table, and I've known since we were kids what big ears she has and what a busybody gossip she is. There's not a doubt in my mind that my entire family now knows of our "other" life. But at 53 years old, I'm really not going to get too excited about it. I'm going to save that excitement for the new addition to our group.