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Yep, intimidating. Not to ME, mind you, but to a lot of straight girls. Contrary to popular belief amongst males, not all girls are bi or bi-curious. Sorry guys. A lot of straight women I know are afraid of swing clubs because of the high interest in FF action. They worry because they think it'll be expected of them. I've never seen a girl get pressured into a girl on girl session at a club, but I do know girls that kinda said they were bi because of peer pressure.

 

If a girl is totally straight, that's fine with me. I hope that no woman is afraid of admitting she is not into other women for fear of being looked down upon. Be honest and truthful, for here is a man who would have sex with you ANYWAY! jk.

 

But seriously, you know what I mean. I hate to think that some women have to lie and feel intimidated because of the bi thing and should see that there are just as many women who are straight and happy that way.

 

That's all I have to say about that.

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That's an interesting view...I never thought that a bi woman would seem intimidating. I guess I always pictured the intimidation and pressure coming from those men who want to see FF action at any cost. I'm not really one who believes that you can "make" someone bi, F or M. Yes, there are different categories or levels of bisexuality, but if one fits into one of those categories, then he/she is to some extent bi. Those people who you speak of sound like straight women being forced to do things against their will, which should never ever happen. I'm looking forward to hearing other views on this topic and learning a little.

 

Mr. Funk

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That's an interesting view... I guess I always pictured the intimidation and pressure coming from those men who want to see FF action at any cost.

 

Mr. Funk, I was all set to wholeheartedly agree with you, but after I thought a minute, I think both of you are correct. If I were a straight woman, I probably would feel pressure from guys (and not necessarily from Drew) in a club situation, but from the woman as well. We've not been to a club before, but we have gone to a social or two and the tendency is to assume that all the women are bi. And, it's not just an assumption that guys make. As a matter of fact, I'm guilty of that kind of thought process too. When looking at possible playmates, I always consider the woman first and whether I'd like to play with her--when she very well may not want to play with me. :sad:

 

It certainly is something to think about....

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As a straight female, yes, it IS intimidating! Just looking through profiles, I was surprised at all the bi or bi curious females out there. Thank goodness it looks like most of them don't mind playing with non-bi females. :)

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As a bi fem....I always error on the side of caution and assume that the women are straight....if they aren't....that's just a bonus. We've done FMF's where the other fem isn't bi....never had any problems. We have a rule....I get taken care of first. he he he.

 

-Keira

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As a straight girl I also find bi-women intimidating because I have met many that are very pushy and/or don't ask first. I had a woman drop to her knees, lift my skirt and stick her face in my pussy while I was in the middle of the bar talking with a group of people. Needless to say when I thumped her in the head she went away. I have also had women grab at my tits while playing with my husband or another man in the play room. So I am always on guard when women approach me.

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This is one speed bump we have hit upon a couple of times. About the third time it sank in....aboutten years ago. Her: we can, "but I ain't havin' sex with no woman", :nono: not that I was expecting her to, but she just put it in my face. Trust me, she is STRIGHT! :lol: Just like me! :D

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Red, being completely straight, was concerned before we started swinging, that she would get hit on a lot by bi women. It hasn't actually happened at all, much to her relief. I reckon she gives off "I'm straight so don't even go there" vibes :)

 

No doubt there are couples who wouldn't want to play with us because Red is straight, but it's never been a big deal and we have played with couples with bi females who have been happy to leave that out when with us.

 

CB

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I think this is really good for us "bi" gals to know so we can set any girls mind at ease ahead of time that we would never want anyone to do anything they didn't want to. And speaking for myself, I would never feel disappointed or let down by it. While I enjoy the hell out of it, it's not something I need or miss if it doesn't happen.

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mrs good times said:
As a straight girl I also find bi-women intimidating because I have met many that are very pushy and/or don't ask first. I had a woman drop to her knees, lift my skirt and stick her face in my pussy while I was in the middle of the bar talking with a group of people. Needless to say when I thumped her in the head she went away. I have also had women grab at my tits while playing with my husband or another man in the play room. So I am always on guard when women approach me.

 

 

Mrs. GT...that was just soooo WRONG. A woman is not above the same rules that a man is...you always ask before touching.

 

When dealing with any woman in a swinging atmosphere I always ask...Are you bi? If they say no then I don't go there. If they say yes, then I ask how bi? What are your comfort levels?

 

I never want to do anything to anyone that would make them feel uncomfortable.

 

Teresa

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Mrs. GT...that was just soooo WRONG. A woman is not above the same rules that a man is...you always ask before touching.

Dito

 

I would have done more than thump her, Mrs. GT.

 

I'd never touch ANYONE without asking them first, be it man or woman.

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"Mrs. GT...that was just soooo WRONG. A woman is not above the same rules that a man is...you always ask before touching"

 

I don't know about that! When we first starting going to the clubs, we were surprised at the amount of FF play. In fact some bi women are very pushy, I remember a woman lifted my wife's shirt up and started grabbing her boobs, when my wife backed off, she said something like "Come on.. I know you like it", luckily my wife is easy going and doesn't "freak out" easily, but still she didn't like it. She has become more tolerant now and sometimes lets other women play with her but she still doesn't do the "all girl dance thing".

 

From what I've seen, the women are much more pushy than the guys, of course if guys acted like that they would be kicked out in short order.

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Ultimately what makes a club great are it's members. They are there to have fun. But without respect and some degree of restraint, things can go downhill very easily. The aggressive path is not to take in a swingers club. I've never seen a really bad situation, mostly just ones where the husband/boyfriend is being pushy and the girlfriend/wife leaves.

 

My main point was that straight women should not be looked down on, try to be changed, or forced into an uncomfortable situation. I just thought it might be nice to point out to straight women that they are NOT alone out there. And, to not be afraid to admit they don't like other girls and they deserve the same respect from other women as they do from men.

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Well, here's an added twist to this thread...I am bisexual as many of you know..however, even us bi girls don't like it when a woman or man for that matter we are not interested in becomes a little too pushy.

 

My hunny and I went to a club awhile back and this woman would NOT get the clue...luckily I found her through the club's forums and set her straight about asking before she touches.

 

Long story as short as possible. I was getting freaky with another lady and was on top of her when that particular lady, unbeknownst to me, took it upon herself to come lick my ass. I didn't know until afterwards and didn't see her anymore at the club...so when I wrote her I expressed my irritation and she apologized and said she has learned something from the experience and that is to ask before doing anything...well???? Duh!! :lol:

 

So, even us bi girls don't like pushy ladies!! ;)

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sensuality said:
that particular lady, unbeknownst to me, took it upon herself to come lick my ass.

 

Don't you just HATE when that happens? I'll tell you, the manager of Shop-Rite had a thing or two to say to me when that happened there the other day!

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Ok then-m, a twist on the question here. In most casese when no means no--and a no is not taken--the person who repeatedly does not respond to the no is generally escorted to the curb (An act that I have seen done twice--not to me--but I have seen it done!!)

 

Now I am not saying I want this treatment to be given to any ladies by any means at all, far from it. But, should these ladies who don't take a no get the same and equal treatment?

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CLITFRIEND said:
should these ladies who don't take a no get the same and equal treatment?

 

Yes, they should... no question about that. I had a guy touch me inappropriately at a club, after I said no and he was outta there fairly quickly afterwards. If a woman did to me what he did I would expect her to be gone just as fast.

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so to you str8 ladies...

 

during FMF, do you object if the F wants to go down on you completly expecting nothing in return?

 

Just to give you a different sensation than your SO?

 

I'd hate to become one of the pushy people....

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I don't know about intimidating, but I can see it being a concern for totally straight women in the lifestyle.

 

The reason we got into swinging was so Mrs. WS could explore her bi side, so we seek out couples in which the F is truly bi or at least VERY bi-curious. But if we were to meet a couple with the F not being bi-courious or bi, and we clicked well with them, we wouldn't pass them over just because of that.

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CLITFRIEND said:
should these ladies who don't take a no get the same and equal treatment?

 

Absolutely, but I've never seen it happen. Clubs want women so I think they are more lenient when it comes to the rules.

 

Purple said:

during FMF, do you object if the F wants to go down on you completly expecting nothing in return?

 

As a straight female FMF doesn't interest me in the least so I've never been in that situation however I have been asked this by couples with a bi-female and my answer is still no. Although I am straight I have allowed a touch or a kiss from another female if I am totally comfortable with her and she fully understands my boundries. It is the ones that assume every female is bi that piss me off.

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so to you str8 ladies...

 

during FMF, do you object if the F wants to go down on you completly expecting nothing in return?

 

Just to give you a different sensation than your SO?

 

I'd hate to become one of the pushy people....

 

Yes, I would object. Thats why boundaries are set ahead of time...I think if a woman tried to do that to me, it would ruin the whole experience of the night for me, honestly. A touch here and there, maybe, anything more, :nono: .

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