Handling male orgasm?

[josiefun 15]

My husband and I recently attended a swing club. We were wondering what the etiquette is regarding male ejaculation in a group setting. Is the guy expected to ask his partner where/how she'd like him to finish? Obviously, if he's wearing a condom, there's no question where it will end up, but what about when playing or having oral sex with multiple participants and there's no real "talking" going on?

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

I would say definately ask first, not in regards to cumming in general but in regards to where. Some women are very adament about certain things.

 

Some will want it down their throats, others will want it all over their face, others won't want it anywhere near them, so it's best to ask before you come.

 

Personally, I always enjoy hearing a guy say "I'm about to come, where do you want it?"

[Regularguy 17]

Here is the problem with the overall premise of this; It ASSUMEs that a guy's come is some type of offensive fluid where women need to be WARNED about it.

 

If a woman has that type of attitude then I won't have anything to do with her-there are too many women available who love everything about a guy then to have to waste time dealing with an offensive anti-male attitude.

 

Can you imagine if we dictated to a women where we wanted her lubrication to end up in case we didn't want it in our mouths or on our dicks? In fairness, over a longer period of time, women secrete an equal amount of fluid, the difference is, us guys aren't phobic about it and we don't engage in long conversations attempting to change the taste via dietary suggestions.

 

This reply is generically posted and not in specific reference to any post here or person by the way. Most people here are pretty interesting ; )

 

My experience at swing clubs is women are usually there because they love everything about guys in the first place, so so far I haven't run into this at all, they have just swallowed it down eagerly or had me come in them.

[Mariposa_y_Oso 15]

No offense, RegularGuy, but your reply is a bit arrogant, if not downright misogynistic...

 

 

//Here is the problem with the overall premise of this; It ASSUMEs that a guy's come is some type of offensive fluid where women need to be WARNED about it.\\

 

I think the smart play here is to assume that semen is potentially dangerous, especially in a group setting as josiefun mentioned, where there is a good possibility of contact with complete strangers. That aside, everyone is entitled to their own preferences and opinions.

 

There is one couple that we play with on a fairly regular basis where the wife just doesn't like cum - even her husband's. I don't take this personally, I respect this and try to be considerate towards her wishes. My wife, on the other hand, enjoys cum and if we know a couple really well, has no problem with swallowing. Everyone is different.

 

I have a question to pose to you, if I may... Let's say you are playing with another couple. She is on her back, he is having sex with her, and you are playing with her breasts. As he's about to cum, he decides to pull out and cum on her belly. While he's pulling out, you notice the movement and turn your head in that direction and receive a couple of shots to the face. Would that bother you? It shouldn't because it's not an offensive fluid, right?

 

I'll admit that I pose this question blindly and it may be moot. Perhaps you're bi and would rather take him in your mouth as he cums and swallow his load yourself. Not my thing, but to each his own. If I were in a similar situation, I assure you that I'd be heading to the restroom for a little old-fashioned soap-and-water action myself.

 

 

 

To address the original post...personally, I tend to be rather vocal when I'm cumming, so there is plenty of warning/opportunity for the woman to tell me where she wants it. Mari tells me she can tell when a man is about to cum when she's giving oral, so even if he doesn't say anything, she's able to point the gun where she wants it to go...

 

Cheers!

~Mike

[OhioCouple 41]

I am one of those females that DO NOT like to swallow cum or have it on my face. I do love having it shoot on my belly or my breasts as much as I love the internal feeling.

 

When giving a blow job, I can tell just before a man is ready to cum as their testicals tighten up. (At least that is my experience) When I feel that start to happen I will finish it off in steady strokes aimed at where I want it. I also do not take for granted anything. I will let any partners know before hand that it is off limits. Period.

 

It is not that I dislike the taste of semen, but the thickness of it just gags me. I can't handle that.

 

As a bisexual woman, I have no problem taking a woman to the ultimate and lapping it up. Of all the female cum I have experienced none have compared to the thickness of a males. On another note though, If my one of the males has cum into the woman, I can handle the semen then as it tends to lose it thickness and is then enjoyable. The women have no complaints about this and the men aren't exactly being dissatisfied either! Usually they are rock hard and ready to roll again!

 

Lori

[Regularguy 17]

Mike, no, my post took those with misandristic views and the double standard to task. Defending one's gender and exposing a double standard is hardly mysogynistic or arrogant. One thing nice about being a respectable, popular nice guy with manners is I don't have to tolerate anti-male behavior to just get laid.

 

Mike wrote; "I think the smart play here is to assume that semen is potentially dangerous"

 

Mike, I am sorry, but that is a misandristic way to think. While I want people to feel comfortable with their decisions, know that i feel more comfortable not being around people who are male-phobic. Why is not a women's lubrication not also something to assume is "dangerous"

 

"I have a question to pose to you, if I may... Let's say you are playing with another couple. She is on her back, he is having sex with her, and you are playing with her breasts. As he's about to cum, he decides to pull out and cum on her belly. While he's pulling out, you notice the movement and turn your head in that direction and receive a couple of shots to the face. Would that bother you? It shouldn't because it's not an offensive fluid, right?"

 

What is interesting about your scenario Mike is you didn't set up a heterosexual scenario. I regularly go down on women full of my come, I kiss women who have my come in their mouths, etc. I have also licked women's clits while there guys are inside of them and coming. My post was about me refusing to be with misandristic women who don't like results of male pleasure, and the double standard of body fluid, but instead you made a male on male scenario. A more parallel scenario is if a women could squirt all her lubrication at once, would you ask her to 'warn" you or spit it out"? The answer would be no. Or maybe once a women starts lubricating, would I move my tongue away so as not to taste the fluid? Again, no. Would i ask questions like" is there something a woman can eat that would change the taste of her pussy juice"? Again, no.

 

"I'll admit that I pose this question blindly and it may be moot. Perhaps you're bi and would rather take him in your mouth as he cums and swallow his load yourself. Not my thing, but to each his own. If I were in a similar situation, I assure you that I'd be heading to the restroom for a little old-fashioned soap-and-water action myself. "

 

Mike, that was a disingenuous ad homineum attack.....is your position and ideas so indefensible you must insinuate your debate opposition must be some cum swallowing bisexual? We would have all laughed in debate competitions in high school had you stated such because tactically everyone would have know it is the equivalent of throwing in the towel. I am quite produly heterosexual by choice, buy I don't fear dicks and come. As a matter of fact, I have my very own dick I take with me everywhere I go.

 

I think that the results of me pleasuring the opposite sex isn't something to be phobic about, and I wanted to point out the double standard.

[Flori_DAMAN 26]

Pardon me?

 

".We would have all laughed in debate competitions in high school had you stated such because tactically everyone would have know it is the equivalent of throwing in the towel.

 

High school debate class? Is this a debatable issue? Are we all gonna get our own lockers?

 

Is ejaculating on a female now considered a human right?

 

I open doors for ladies, stand up when they enter a room, take my hat off and put my shirt on when dining with them, and never ejaculate on them unless they have expressed a desire for me too do so.

 

I am polite and respectful of females not because of a sublimal desire to lay every one of them I meet, but because it is the way my mother taught me to be. Now don't you go debatin my momma! Of course mother never actually gave me rules about where to squirt my jism, but I would certainly feel a bit presumptious to assume I could squirt it on anyone's hair, her face, her tits, or even her best sofa without at least asking.

 

Comparing semen to females lubrication in this context is ludicrous at best. Do you really believe what you are saying? Millions of men actually prefer not to engage in oral sex because they just don't like the idea of lapping bodily fluids. Especially if the female is very sexually active.

 

Extending your argument to its logical conclusion men should have no choice either. If any female that you are having sex with wants you to eat her then its your duty. cmon.

 

You suggest that you are defending the entire male gender.

 

Maybe you really think you are, but you certainly don't represent the entire gender, at least not the human species.

 

One other thing that kinda bugs me.

 

Regularguy "My post was about me refusing to be with misandristic women who don't like results of male pleasure, ...."

 

Call me dumb but I had to look up misyngistic.....

 

Here is what I found at merriam's, Greek misogynia, from misein to hate + gynE woman -- Date: circa 1656

: a hatred of women

 

 

So you don't like misandristic women? I'm just confused I guess....John.

[sportync 20]

This seems to me a case of taking a simple question and complicating the hell out of it. Nowhere in the original post was there anything written that would make one feel that this post assumes that male ejaculate is offensive. They were just asking a question regarding etiquette, and it seemed to me a very reasonable question. How that ever got you talking about high-school debate class and male homosexuality is beyond me. You're with someone you really don't know and you are about to come with a stranger in a strange environment. Yes, I think it would be polite to ask, not because male ejaculate is offensive, but because some people might prefer it on their breasts or in their mouth instead of in their pussy. It's all about fantasy fulfillment, and everyone's is different. It might be her fantasy to have you pull out and come in her husband's mouth, but you'll never know if you don't ask! So it just seems the polite thing to do to tell them and let them decide. It could make for smoother sailing the next time and could very well insure that there might just be a next time.Sportync

[Regularguy 17]

I don't think a woman should have to ask a guy if it is ok for her to lubricate into his mouth during oral sex, which is a perfectly natural physiological response to a guy going down on a girl, and I don't think a guy should have to ask if it is ok for him to have a perfectly natural physiological reaction by coming when a woman is going down on him. I would expect a guy to finish her proper, and I would expect a woman to do the same. Is it a requirement? No. I had the same situation happen to me once. The girl pulled her mouth off me just as I was about to come. Ruined my climax. Then I went down on her...and just as she was about to come, I stopped licking her clit and rubbed it instead with a finger. She yelled at me that I ruined her climax. i told her i was just like her, I don't want people to climax while my mouth was on them durin goral sex, I told her I thought she could relate. She was fuming as I laughed, walked out the front door and told her to go buy a vibrator and never call me again. There are too many women who like giving oral sex the right way, and too many guys who love to go down on their woman, for people to settle for someone who isn't a as pleasing of a lover as possible.

 

I will continue to equate a guy coming with a woman coming, as both are excreting body fluids, the delivery is just timed different. OhioCouple, I beleieve in fair play, so the times I have run into guys who liked to receive oral sex from a woman and not give it, I strongly let them know what I thought of that. I cannot believe there actually are guys that do not like to give a woman pleasure with their mouths and tongues. It drives women nuts, and what guy who isn't good lover would pass up on such a chance to so please his partner?!

[Greg & Sheryl 369]

While you, regularguy, certainly have the right to choose your sexual partners based on their acceptance of your semen, it must be pointed out that your treatment of the lady in your story was quite cruel. As disappointing as it may of been to have your climax ruined when she took her mouth off of you, she didn't do that with punitive intent. You, on the other hand, ruined her climax deliberately and proceeded to make sarcastic remarks before walking out on her. We won't go as far as to label your behavior mysogynistic, but we will call it rude.

 

As active swingers, we're sure most of us have been in a situation where we discovered that our playmate for the evening isn't the lover we hoped he/she would be. To denigrate that person before the sheets are even dry doesn't do anything but hurt the feelings of others and create enemies for yourself. You described yourself as a "respectable, popular nice guy with manners," regularguy, but you certainly don't come across as being that way in your story.

 

A better way to handle this situation would have been to say nothing, but decline to play with her again if she ever makes another offer. Better yet, why not discuss a lady's semen preferences with her before you end up in the sack?

[Greg & Sheryl 369]

While you, regularguy, certainly have the right to choose your sexual partners based on their acceptance of your semen, it must be pointed out that your treatment of the lady in your story was quite cruel. As disappointing as it may of been to have your climax ruined when she took her mouth off of you, she didn't do that with punitive intent. You, on the other hand, ruined her climax deliberately and proceeded to make sarcastic remarks before walking out on her. We won't go as far as to label your behavior mysogynistic, but we will call it rude.

 

As active swingers, we're sure most of us have been in a situation where we discovered that our playmate for the evening isn't the lover we hoped he/she would be. To denigrate that person before the sheets are even dry doesn't do anything but hurt the feelings of others and create enemies for yourself. You described yourself as a "respectable, popular nice guy with manners," regularguy, but you certainly don't come across as being that way in your story.

 

A better way to handle this situation would have been to say nothing, but decline to play with her again if she ever makes another offer. Better yet, why not discuss a lady's semen preferences with her before you end up in the sack?

[youngish56 15]

regularguy and others-

 

I'm sure I'm not the only one to have needed dictionary assistance to even start understanding your posts. Once I understood the textbook meaning of three of the mystery words, only then could I reread your text to understand its content.

 

Sorry to be pill - or is that a pharmaceutical capsulation.haha

[Regularguy 17]

Greg and Sheryl,

 

Interesting how you leap to the defense of a women who screws up a guys climax, but then when he does to her exactly the same thing, you call him rude.

 

This is another typical example of boorish behavior by women being excused and even affirmatively defended and when a guy does the same thing he is called rude and misogynist which if radical feminist lexicon to be hurled at your political enemies (males). Since it is quite clear I don't tolerate such behavior beaue I am not a wimp, it is apparent that guys who don't are to be attacked because guys need to be kept in a place where they accept crappy behavior by women and anything less, they are to be personally denigrated just as you did to me.

 

Your response bolsters my contention once again.

 

Youngish56, if you need a dictionary to understand my posts, at least you finally end up understanding them......that is better than I do about my posts,

 

As to my vocabulary (if only I proof-typed my posts!), I have been told by some it is vast. I have been told by others it is not vast at all. I think I am safe to assume I am right in the middle-- I am half-vast.

 

[Greg & Sheryl 369]

"Interesting how you leap to the defense of a women who screws up a guys climax, but then when he does to her exactly the same thing, you call him rude. "

 

Perhaps you skimmed over the part where we wrote, "When she took her mouth off of you, she didn't do that with punitive intent." That was the distinction we were making. We were deliberately trying to avoid making this a male/female issue, even going as far as saying, "We won't go as far as to label your behavior mysogynistic." Perhaps you skimmed over that statement as well.

 

This isn't an issue about female behavior versus male behavior. This is simply an issue of common courtesy. In the story you relayed to us, we feel you failed to exhibit any courtesy, even though courtesy is something you regard as one of your virtues.

 

We believe our basic disagreement lies in your assertion that any woman who doesn't "love everything about a guy" is somehow "anti-male." We fail to see that connection. We feel that an aversion to semen is a mere personal preference that needs to be respected.

[youngish56 15]

Regularguy-

 

You post an interesting dichotomy of humility and arrogance. None have personally attacked you as yet. Keep up the interesting posts. Your challenges bring out interesting responses.

 

I learned "dichotomy" in a marketing class plus 30 years ago.

 

My other 3 or more syllable words are "deviate' and "degenerate". Please confine your future posts to one or two syllables except when using these words. haha

 

Pere Noel.

[Regularguy 17]

Youngish56, the scary thing is I write exactly the same way I speak!...minus the typos of course! hehe....

 

I remember listening a few times to William F Buckley. Talk about a vocabulary! But I admire that type of education and don't think it is something to be hidden. I do public speaking and have been told several times that I speak above the level of the group and to tone it down to their level. I refuse. I would rather treat everyone as educated and intelligent as I am (or am not, lol) I have always admired intelligence manifested however. Whether it be the spatial skills men are superior at, the language and human relational skills women excel at, or whatever. Public speaking is difficult too, but not half as difficult as trying to speak while delivering that Black Baptist Revival thing like TJ Jakes does. Man, that takes some talent!

 

I still reject the entire title of this thread as anti-male because if a thread was made on what the polite thing should be on how to handle female orgasm, i.e her lubrication, it would be labeled as misogynistic, but then someone here went so far as to state that semen should be treated as dangerous and should come with a "warning". However the thread seems to be degenerating into inferences of which I am probably guilty of too and into less then courteous stuff so rather then perpetually rebutting as a form of chess-like reparte' which I am sure isn't entertaining for anyone, I will respectfully bow out of this negativity as I have said my peace. I would rather focus on pleasure!

[youngish56 15]

regularguy-

 

I think you stepped on your dick again with the suggestion that a pretentious vocabulary is the result of education and intelligence.

 

I believe that many feel, as I do, that an impressive vocabulary is commonly, not always, the result of the speakers fixation with impressing his listeners with his vocabulary. Nothing more.

 

Looking forward to kicking another topic with you.

 

Joyous Noel

[Greg & Sheryl 369]

We regret that you have decided to bow out of the debate, regularguy, because we were actually enjoying the exchange. You are one of only two members of this board (Julie being the other) for whom we check the "Search for all posts by this user" link because we enjoy reading your opinions even if we don't always agree with them. We hope you didn't take personal offense to any of our opinions. We will respectfully withhold any comment on your last statement, and we will look forward to discussing other topics in the future.

[vorphlak 15]

if i was a girl...i would not wanna throat full of goo....it is not malephobia it is like trying to swallow 4 tablespoons of cottagecheese with a touch of urine for flava!

and as far as the comment towards women only bein' there cuz' men are soooo cool---WHAT A CROCK! if anything it's the otherway around buddy...and yes you are *V E R Y* arrogant. i think alot of guys would agree that your not only off but rude and what seems to be sexist! you need to find enlightenment. it makes life almost beautiful...try yoga or tai chi.

[ATAK 15]

Why is not a women's lubrication not also something to assume is "dangerous"

 

The answer to this question is simple. A man cannot become empregnated by a woman's lubrication, yet a woman can become empregnated by a man's ejaculate. Therefore I think it's safe to say that becoming pregnant is a "danger" if it is unplanned. Hence, making the semen "dangerous". This is already assuming you've gotten past the STD conversations and are confident in everyone's safety.

 

As far as for oral sex, I would not assume to cum in a woman's mouth any sooner than I would assume she likes to eat oysters, or squid. Some people hate oysters(I am one), however I love squid! The point being that it IS a matter of personal taste (no pun intended) and should not be seen as a gender specific obligation because you think it's the way it should be...

I think we should all have governmentally subsidized health care, but it ain't that way is it? Just because I want it that way, or think it should be that way doesn't make it that way.

 

There are too many women who like giving oral sex the right way, and too many guys who love to go down on their woman, for people to settle for someone who isn't a as pleasing of a lover as possible.

 

Is the right way, your way? Have a bit of tolerance for some of the rest of us few million people on the planet.

 

I find that your views are not as mysogynistic as they are chauvinistic.

 

chauvinism >noun 1 exaggerated or aggressive patriotism. 2 excessive or prejudiced support for one's own cause, group, or sex.

 

While I found this thread entertaining, I also find it disheartening to think that there are people out there that are truly this closed-minded about something so deeply personal to us all. (Not trying to start a flame war)

 

Everyone was raised by different parents, with a different set of moral and ethical standards. With a varying range of incomes and influences, it's hard to categorize one train of thought to be the standard for us all. We are a diverse group of people within the lifestyle, who happen to share a common interest. What works for some does not work for others. It is this difference that makes the experience richer. If you knew that every woman wanted it that same way every single time, then after the first time, there'd be no thrill, no unknown to excite the imagination.

 

To answer the original topic, I always ask, either before we start, or when I feel climax is eminent, unless I'm wearing a rubber and am already inside her.

[mdcouple26 15]

This shocks me, to hear of this behavior .

 

Thank goodness I have yet to meet another man with the opinion that it is his God-given right to cum anywhere he pleases! I enjoy oral sex as much as the next person, but would never go so far as to belittle a sexual partner if he/she chose not to. I may choose to not play with the individual again, but that is my choice. Refuse to grant an orgasm?? NEVER!

 

That said, I DO very much enjoy swallowing cum, or feeling it on my face or body. I consider it the icing on the cake, so to speak. However, I always respect others' preferences and limits. ALWAYS. I view this as the golden rule of swinging.

[Chrissylababe 15]

Well, I have read several of the postings on this subject and would have to side with the ASK group. I think that it shows respect for the partner. It also may be a turn on for the partner to have you cum in a certain location. Some love to see it on their belly, others prefer it inside, while others would enjoy swallowing the fruits of your efforts.

I also read in one posting (tongue in cheek) regarding mfm and one man getting the others cum on him. I guess I am fortunate in this area as it would not bother me in the least. In fact I may (depending on the females desire) even take it in my mouth. I have been with a few couples where the female really enjoyed watching me do that. For me it was no different than any other act in an attempt to please and be pleased.

Enjoy and be safe.

Chrissy

yes I'm a part time cd:kiss:

[Jeok 3]

To Regularguy. You're a Capital "J" Jerk. Cum IS Dangerous, nowadays, and moreso with guys like you. Your attitude is why AIDS, Herpes, and all other STDs are such a problem in all society. ALSO, You don't seem to give a damn about getting the women it sounds as though you "FUCK," pregnant. Would you care and be responsible for any bastards you spawn? I apologize to everyone else for being rude and crude, but my late wife and I ran into a creep like this. Beware Ladies and Couples...The beast is among you, here. This guy probably hates women and only considers them Cum Recepticals. So, not caring to be as Politically Correct as others, I'll have my say as he's promoted his paternal, Chavinistic opinion. Jeok

[StacyCat 30]

Etiquette is to ask. If you are of the persuasion of "RegularGuy" and require all access to ones body to be ejaculated onto, then that really needs to be negotiated up front.

 

I do not swallow cum, it makes my throat sore and my stomach sick. And, the vast majority of the guys that I play with will stop me when I get close, or ask me at the beginning.

 

Oh, and, semen can be dangerous. I do not let guys cum in or on my pussy or asshole area, simply from the STD risk.

[spectraschain 21]

I have said my peace

Piece, I believe, Webster...

[havefuninsun 122]

"RegularGuy" hasn't commented in 3-5 years (I looked earlier; can't remember if it was 2003 or 2005). Why in the hell was this revived?

 

Gesh.

[spectraschain 21]

Why in the hell was this revived?

Jeok just remembered what he wanted to say....

[spectraschain 21]

Oh....great fun. This guy's been dead for years, but check all posts by....

Word.

[kimnbob 15]

Just a couple of things here. In defense of regguy, it has been my experience that if you are performing oral on a woman and she enjoys oral orgasms, there is no way you can stop before she cums without being a jerk, even if you tell her you don't want to.

 

And if a woman stops before I cum, even if she lets me know, I don't get as much satisfaction as I would if she had finished, and I am always a little disappointed.

 

As far as STDs, women can spread em just as easily as men. As far as the pregnancy thing, I thought we were talkin about oral sex.

[wakej 21]

I guess this shows you should be careful of whom you pair up with. You might end up with someone who is vindictive because they didn't get what they want or think they are owed. That's pretty scary. I'm kind of taken back by "regularguy's" seemingly self centered attitude. Good sex for me is making the woman feel good.

[Lawguy 15]

Well, despite the attacks against him (and his use of words which I don't really think are in the dictionary ), Regularguy is spot on. On the basis of pure logic, he is right--I've read the varied responses and they don't seem to answer him.

 

Now, it's not that I ever plan to adopt Regularguy's "procedures" during sex, but logically he has a valid point. For some of the others who responded: come on folks--debate the guy, but don't use epithets and get personal--it just shows that you have run out of arguments.

 

My .02

 

Lawguy

[magnum 78]

My husband and I recently attended a swing club. We were wondering what the etiquette is regarding male ejaculation in a group setting. Is the guy expected to ask his partner where/how she'd like him to finish? Obviously, if he's wearing a condom, there's no question where it will end up, but what about when playing or having oral sex with multiple participants and there's no real "talking" going on?

 

For me, it depends who I am playing with. If I know them couple/woman/wife we usually know what the routine is; one couple In play with, I now she likes to swallow, so I cum in her mouths LOVE IT! another woman, likes me/us to cum on her face and tits, more fun!

[havefuninsun 122]

come on folks--debate the guy

 

How can we debate a guy who hasn't been online for 3-5 YEARS?!?

 

Are we going to revive the debate? If so, revive it, but leave him out of it ... start your own debate.

[spectraschain 21]

I told you he's dead....as in dead.

[tribbles 490]

So all males who swing must have total control over their orgasms and ejaculations? No one ever has one sneak up and grab them and it happens?

 

Oh and all the squirting chicks outta start asking....one surprised the male here by just squirting down his throat and I've seen others spray it on people walking in the play area who had no clue and were not part of the play.

 

Women, you better KNOW when an O will be a squirting one and ask before you squirt if it's ok and aim the stuff too. Yep, what holds for men, is true for us too.

 

 

(I am only playing with people who are happy with fluids. The rest need not apply). facelick

[spectraschain 21]

one surprised the male here by just squirting down his throat

Yep. Had that happen during an ill-timed inhale.

[couplewanting50 65]

Recently I had the marvelous opportunity of entering a sexy little woman as we were playing. She got me very close to orgasm, and I was doing what I needed to in order to avoid coming.

 

This thread got me to thinking about all of that, and the general subject. First, I would not have ejaculated in her without asking. Having said that, it would be nice [not required, just nice] if a woman would say something about her preference.

 

It was obvious to her, I am sure, that I was close. I think had she said that she wanted me to come in her, that would have been it for me, and I would have lost it. As it was, we played a bit more and then I withdrew, as I like not coming.

[Cpl2share 147]

Gotta jump on this: Lubricant is to facilitate the entrance of an item into the vagina. It is not a voluntary or stoppable reaction. Ejaculate (male) can be stopped, and is the culmination of the act. Therefore: In our opinion: There is a major difference between the two fluids. Additionally: A man can not go down on a woman without getting vaginal fluid on him (unless he is really bad LOL) yet a woman is providing a lubricant (saliva) to make the feelings of a blow job more intense. We do not consider ejaculate to be a reward to the woman (unless she requests it) but a reward to the man BY the woman. Therefor: If you do not want vaginal juices on your face, don't eat out. If a woman does not want ejaculate in her mouth or anywhere else for that matter, don't put it there.

[magnum 78]

Recently I had the marvelous opportunity of entering a sexy little woman as we were playing. She got me very close to orgasm, and I was doing what I needed to in order to avoid coming.

 

This thread got me to thinking about all of that, and the general subject. First, I would not have ejaculated in her without asking. Having said that, it would be nice [not required, just nice] if a woman would say something about her preference.

 

It was obvious to her, I am sure, that I was close. I think had she said that she wanted me to come in her, that would have been it for me, and I would have lost it. As it was, we played a bit more and then I withdrew, as I like not coming.

 

I anounce that I am getting ready to cum and just ask..."Where do you want me to cum?"...The woman will let you know...Ideally she would say cum in her mouth, I love that, but I also enjoying cumming were ever she wants it...

[The Fuse 1,012]

This is a really interesting thread. Even the conflict had a lot of interesting points to it.

 

If I'm giving a blow job, I appreciate being asked but don't get huffy if the guy doesn't ask. I'm one of those women who like it no matter where it goes. Oh, one exception... don't like it on my face. That seems a bit degrading to me. So I guess I have to take it back.

 

If I didn't want it in my mouth, or if I had some other strong preference, I think I would speak up before it was too late. That's actually my only real point here... if the woman has a preference, then she should speak up instead of waiting to be asked. However, if the guy asks, I would consider that good manners.

[Lawguy 15]

How can we debate a guy who hasn't been online for 3-5 YEARS?!?

 

Are we going to revive the debate? If so, revive it, but leave him out of it ... start your own debate.

 

Dead is only a state of mind. Wait! You're serious? Haha, sorry, really I am. I guess I didn't pay enough attention and when it showed up on the recent posts section, I just thought that it was . . . um, recent.

 

Lawguy.

[curiouscpl0416 15]

Sprout here,

 

I have moments when I am perfectly happy to swallow cum, but those moments are very rare. I have an extremely strong gag reflex and simply cannot handle doing so on a regular basis. Deep throating.... same thing.

 

I have to be in what I call my "zone" to be able to turn my reflex off. That said, I have no issue with a man cumming on my breasts, stomach, face (so long as I know it's coming, pardon the pun, as I am not fond of being shot in the eye, yes I have had that happen), or anywhere else, if he so desires.

 

If I am giving a blow job and the man is about to cum, and I remove my mouth, I am more than willing to do whatever else is necessary to bring him back to orgasm, up to and including licking around and tongue diving into his ass.

 

On the flip side of the coin.... if I am being eaten out, or otherwise pleasured, and the man chooses to stop just before I climax, though it may be the cause of a brief moment of frustration (and I have been known to cuss my husband out severely for doing so, :throwafit but in a playful manner) it is also, for me, the promise of a stronger and much more intense orgasm later.

 

I have had a tubal ligation, therefore pregnancy is not a concern for me, however, the ONLY person who is going to have intercourse with me without using a condom, is my husband, and the ONLY person he is going to have intercourse with, without using a condom, is me. I know he is clean, he knows I am clean, but we wouldn't presume to expect anyone else to blindly trust our word for that, just as we would not blindly trust anyone else if they told us that they were clean. That's just, pure and simple, common sense.

 

My personal opinion, it's just common courtesy to ask. Communication beforehand is key.... and that goes for both men AND women.