Would you perform a sexual activity just to please your partner?

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

Ok, this came up in another topic, so I thought I'd post a poll here and ask.

 

If your partner asked you to do something because it would turn them on to see it, would you do it just for them? Even if it was something that you had no interest in or that perhaps even repulsed you?

 

For instance, if you are straight would you engage in bisexual activities to please your partner (because they wanted to see it)?

 

This can apply to anything not just bisexual activities, the one example John used was having his wife get gangbanged by a group of midgets so that he could watch.

 

Vote in the poll then tell us how far you would be willing to go JUST to please your partner.

[sinc 15]

I'm not so much what I wouldn't do but when. I'm pretty open but I have be able to enjoy and be into what we are doing or forget it .If I have to do it without feeling comfortable then I wont do it. It may sound selfish but I wouldn't expect anyone else to do something for me if they didn't feel comfortable. Sex is for enjoyment why make it work.

I don't think I'm open enough to try any animal. Ill stick with humans.

[TeamSoBe 36]

I'll do pretty much anything that doesn't leave anybody injured if my wife wants me to. It doesn't matter a lot to me if I enjoy the specific activity, if she's getting something out of it then I'm enjoying providing fun for her.

[Alura 2,774]

I think I can safely say that I would do anything Mrs. Alura asked of me. That's because she knows me well enough to know what to ask. I would never submit to anal but she would never ask it of me because she would have no interest in seeing it herself.

 

Mr. Alura

 

I agree with my husband on this. Neither of us would ever do S&M, bondage, water sports, etc. We tried anal once early in our relationship but neither of us liked it so we never did it again. We tried unsuccessfully tried a dp once and I'd like to try that again but so would he.

 

Mrs. Alura

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

Quote

Originally posted by Alura

I agree with my husband on this. Neither of us would ever do S&M, bondage, water sports, etc. We tried anal once early in our relationship but neither of us liked it so we never did it again. We tried unsuccessfully tried a dp once and I'd like to try that again but so would he.

 

Just curious are you doing double vaginal penetration then? Since you said you didn't like anal?

[Alura 2,774]

We think we didn't like anal because we couldn't kiss and Mrs. Alura felt like she needed to shit. We didn't hate it, we'd just rather do other things. She'd like to have another go at dp with anal/vaginal penetration and Mr. Alura is happy to help. We may never do that again once we've tried it. On the other hand, who knows?

[dragonfly_nc 16]

Hmm..well I would be willing to "try" most anything (minus pain or water sports) to satisfy my partner. However if it was something I just wasn't into I wouldn't continue it, just to satisfy him.

[RnKin Fla 15]

We have a friend who is a bi-male. He likes R. I have a fantasy of watching R get a blowjob from another guy. R is not willing (but I keep bugging him about it).

 

In light of all this, it would not be fair of me to say I would not do certain things to please my partner. I do have some limits, however.

 

No scat. Ick. No bestiality. Double Ick.

 

The thing is, there is not much I won't try. I think the above is pretty much my list of things that are off-limits. And since the above two also turn R off, I doubt there is any danger of him asking me to engage in them.

 

But, to answer the question that was posed. Yes, I'd try nearly anything I haven't tried before if R wanted me to. Of course, then I'd expect him to indulge my fantasy as well.

 

I know that R would never EVER try being on the receiving end of anal sex. I have begged and pleaded with him to let me use my strap-on, told him I'd be gentle , you know all those things guys say when trying to get a virgin into bed...and he adamantly refuses.

 

So, I guess some fantasies will remain just that.

 

There may be hope for the BJ fantasy however.

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

Quote

Originally posted by Alura

We think we didn't like anal because we couldn't kiss and Mrs. Alura felt like she needed to shit. We didn't hate it, we'd just rather do other things. She'd like to have another go at dp with anal/vaginal penetration and Mr. Alura is happy to help. We may never do that again once we've tried it. On the other hand, who knows?

 

I can't help you on the feeling like you have to shit bit, but on the odd occasions that we have anal sex, I prefer a position where I am sitting on top of him and riding him. This allows me to control how deep how fast and also still gives us access to kiss, allow him to play with my breasts more easily and it allows me easier access to my clit (without having to hold myself up on one arm).

[FTnPV 15]

My wife has been so fantastic to me that I'd do almost anything she asked. The only thing that is definitely off limits is my backdoor. Even if it were something that doesn't trip my trigger, I'd do it if she enjoyed it. That would probably get me going because I love seeing her enjoy herself!

[bimrdcpl 15]

We as a couple are willing to try just about anything for each other, but we also have a pact together that if one of us did not enjoy it fully then we will not do it again. That way we can move on to the next thing. And I have to admit there isn't to much we wont do.

 

That's what works for us.

[sportync 20]

The responses I've read don't really surprise me, coming from the open-minded, trusting and loving people who frequent this site.

 

My wife made me an offer recently that I found rather intriguing.

 

Although she thoroughly enjoys taking me orally during foreplay, she thought that I might enjoy the experience of being deep-throated and swallowed at least once in my life.

 

She has a couple of friends that are somewhat gifted in this particular ability, and she asked me if I would want to have one of them give me a treat, since this is something that she can't do herself.

 

After further discussion, she told me that these girls don't really get any sexual pleasure from the act themselves, it's more of a joy of accomplishment and the ability to do something which other's can't that they enjoy.

 

That pretty much gave me my answer. If both parties aren't really into the sex act, then it's time to change the act or change the partner.

 

Now, my fantasy would be to have my wife sitting on my face while the other girl was working her magic, but my wife doesn't really wish to be involved. So, I can happily do without this particular treat.

 

Now if I knew that the other girl would have a multiple orgasm while performing her magic, I might reconsider. That doesn't seem to be the case, though, so I think I'll pass.

[Vjklander 138]

About the only thing I would 100% not do is being restrained myself. Anything else I would at least think about.

[txbev71 15]

No I don't think I would do something that I wasn't interested in just to please the hubby. Because if I'm not into it then it is normally not any fun.

 

Besides, there isn't a whole lot right now that I won't do. Don't think he's ever come up with anything that didn't intrigue my interest.

[omneesx 15]

We responded no.

 

In a given circumstance, part of our pleasure is granted from knowing that the other partner is being pleased. To willfully submit one partner to an act that they have explicitly stated a negative toward sounds a bit like like S/M to us. We're not into S/M right now so we don't dabble in that area.

 

When trying something new, we always ask to make sure everyone agrees. To say we have limitations should be understood by all.

 

Sometimes we enjoy having our limits tested. Sometimes we don't.

 

We'll get there sooner or later.

[kpennink 15]

Well, I'm one of the "anything" answers. I guess the key was that the question was not "Would you do perform a sexual activity just to please someone?," it was "Would you do perform a sexual activity just to please your partner?" We know one another's limits, and trust each other to respect them. Is that splitting hairs too much?

 

All of the above can, however, make it even more of a treat when one of us volunteers to something out of the ordinary, because he/she thinks the other will like it.

 

PS: I do reserve the right to change my answer if I see the Mrs. coming at me with a 15" strap-on and hot branding iron!

[Cr8tivecpl 15]

Aside from the usual... and me with another man there isn't much that I wouldn't try. I'm pretty open to anything but hardcore BDSM, anything that would be degrading to myself or someone else and my hand goes over my ass if there is a fleshy appendage coming at me...other than that I am good to go.

[tazzie_n_truck 17]

Well for Truck he would do about anything but have sex with another guy.

 

Tazzie about anything but anal, no watersports or anything extremely kinky.

[couplefromma 15]

We would do almost anything to please the other and have gone there a couple of times. We also know where our limitations are and because we love each other and communicate not performing those acts is okay on both sides. It usually helps that what turns Mr. Couple off also turns off Mrs. Couple

[akamgaxoxo 25]

I said no, that I would not go ahead and do things just to satisfy my spouse. I think the both of us know our bounderies fairly well, and I have yet to have him ask me to do something sexually that we both aren't interested in.

[leftcoastcouple 32]

I can honestly say that there's nothing I can think of that I wouldn't do if it would get Mrs. LC going. I'm fairly safe in saying that, because her tastes are fairly vanilla, but even if they weren't, I'd answer the same.

 

Now if only she'd say the same (though she's pretty darn close!) ...

[eric1 15]

Yes, up for anything, tho' I'm the more adventurous one in in theory she surprises me often in practice! and I love her.

[DBL D 120]

I wouldn't do anything I didn't want to do, and wouldn't expect Fem D to feel pressured either.

 

On the other hand, there's not much I would say "no" to. facelick

 

There are those things that you may end up doing with a partner that isn't your SO's cup of tea, that way you are able to fulfill your own fantasies.

 

Male D

[Purple 15]

I think I read more into the question - I took it to mean "If your partner asked, and it had not been on your fantasy list, would you do it anyway, just to make them happy?" -- not to mean "would you do something you'd previously said no to, just bacause your partner begged you to?"

 

I said I have limits... however, I'm not sure other than extreme pain what those limits are. I always reserve the right to say "NO" so I could not answer with the first response.

[HotMoCpl 20]

I believe I can answer honestly for both of us. As long as it does not have anything to do with gay or bisexual acts, bd/sm, scat, weirdos and repulsive stuff..... yeah, anything.

[MrSnozzberryBlu 15]

I would do anything my wife wanted to do...not because she has me by the short hairs...but because I believe that pleasing her is one of the best ways to show your love for her. Luckily, she's not into anything I would ever want to do.

[adventureUS2 25]

I have been know to do somethings I wouldn't normally do in the intrest of gettting my wife off.

 

I don't really consider my self bi. (My wife calls me a situational bi sexual.)How ever my wife loves to watch two men play together. The fact that I can do something that gets her goat is a turn on for me. I have been know to recieve oral sex from another man in order to satisfy my wifes fantacy. I really enjoyed the reaction from her and the women from the other couple.

 

Now I am not so sure I would ever be able to return the favor, to the other man. And I really don't think I could do anything more then oral with another man. If my wife ever wanted me to do more I am not sure how far I would be willing to go.

[ALilOEverything 901]

Unless there was something that really bothered me or disgusted me I would give it a try.

 

I used to say I would try anything twice. The first time to see what it's all about and the second time because I'm never completely relaxed the first time. But I won't continue to do anything if I didn't like it.

 

I would never want him to do anything that bothered him or disgusted him but I would like him to try things even though he thinks it wouldn't be a huge turn on for him.

 

He's often finds he enjoys things even though he didn't think he would before.

[reguyngirlky 15]

We are in agreement in our desires so there aren't any "do it for me" type of things. I don't know if this makes us unique or just in touch with each other. We have discussed just about every interest we have as individuals and as a couple and tend to honestly agree on things. We discuss just about everything that comes to mind sexually and otherwise. Communication is always key to us.

[DBL D 120]

OK, well, maybe here's an example. Kissing!

 

After 25 plus years with each other we find that while we do French Kiss each other and enjoy it

we may not do it as much as when we are with one of our partners. Is one of us going to get upset

about too much kissing? Not likely.

 

Same thing applies to other things you may wish to do as well. Let's say you two have just been diving into each other and skipping alot of foreplay and then when you have a "date" you find that more oral is involved. Are we gonna get upset about that? Not likely.

 

Throughout the evening there should be plenty of time set aside for everyone to get their fill and not feel that something was left undone or unsaid even if it's in code to each other. Flexibility is the key and being comfy enough with one another to allow that there will be those times that come along where things happen.

 

Like I said there isn't much we'd say "NO" to.

[Zoe&Wash 93]

Thanks Julie - this question now has us surfing the extreme bondage sites. I didn't know there was so much that could be done with gas masks . . .

 

She is attempting to show me how far she wouldn't ask me to go . . . .

 

My short answer - I'd do whatever she wants b/c I trust her not to reach for the gas masks.

 

 

Having just been handed the keyboard for my own explanation - I dated a man who was into some serious b&d for a brief while. There were things I wouldn't even consider with him. Not a lack of trust, just a serious turn-off. I know my husband wouldn't ask certain things of me, but we're just starting to get into serious discussions about fantasies, so who knows? Guess it's strictly my exposure to truly weird stuff!

[ranchcouple3 15]

I(male) would try almost anything if the wife thought she would enjoy it. I have always done my best to help her get the most out of life. The hardest part is getting her to say anything about what she might like.

[Spoomonkey 421]

JustAskJulie said:

If your partner asked you to do something because it would turn them on to see it, would you do it just for them?

 

I would definitely have limits. For one - I wouldn't do something that I felt would have a negative impact on our relationship. For example, if it is something that would (knowing her and knowing myself) arouse jealousy, it wouldn't be worth it.

 

JustAskJulie said:

Even if it was something that you had no interest in or that perhaps even repulsed you? For instance, if you are straight would you engage in bisexual activities to please your partner (because they wanted to see it)?

 

If asked, I would simply assure my wife that this would not be very hot... I mean - I could probably get through the act, but the eroticism of the whole thing would really be blunted by the crying and gagging involved...

 

We have a simple rule - if both of us aren't into it, we aren't going to do it. I love watching Mrs Spoo when she is enjoying herself. But watching her do something she isn't enjoying, just so I can see it... I'd feel pretty miserable about that and we'd both end up not enjoying it.

 

That may mean that we are limited to the activities that we are on the same page about - but we are pretty much always on the same page. So it works well.

[Livin24nic8 15]

I think I would be down for just about everything as long as it's safe.

 

About the other man thing though, I have been in MFMs and I enjoy that due to the fact that the girl is getting off so much. However there is no sexual activity between me and the other guy.

[djjwp 129]

He: I'm a plug, not a socket if ya catch my drift. Beyond that, play ball!

 

She: Also the same but reverse! She likes the boys.

[good times 991]

If your partner asked you to do something because it would turn them on to see it, would you do it just for them? Even if it was something that you had no interest in or that perhaps even repulsed you?

We have discussed this before and decided that no we wouldn't do it. The reasons a pretty much the same as Spoomonkey gave.

 

 

For instance, if you are straight would you engage in bisexual activities to please your partner (because they wanted to see it)?

This is a good example because Mrs. GT is not Bi and while I'm not really into the girl/girl thing either, if I was, I just don't think it would be exciting for me if I new she was doing it just because I wanted her to.

[WesternSwing 504]

I think first off that we would never ask each other to do something that we knew the other didn't want to do just to satisfy ourself. But Mrs. WS has done things that we first said we'd only do with each other because I asked her to it with someone else because I wanted to see it. So she wasn't against doing it in the first place at all. Those are just bridges we've crossed and then erased them from our "rules" list. ?

[oddcouple2841 16]

My boyfriend and I are open to almost anything, so I would do something to make him happy and vica versa. There are certain things he wants to try and there are certain things I want to try. If we don't like it, we won't do it and we'll put it in on our "won't do" list.

[telly2 15]

I'm not really into other woman but for him i have played a bit for his viewing plessure. I will admit over time I have gotten a feel for it, and am more willing to try different things.

[Guest MrsVan]

This is an interesting question...However, I would have to say that I would do almost anything for MrVan. He knows my limits and what I would be willing to do, however we are in the lifestyle to please each other and if there is something that I can do that would make things more exciting and interesting, you bet I would do it.

 

MrVan has done so many things for me and to be able to fulfill his fantasies would make happy.

[sweet_tna 680]

I voted that I wouldn't doing anything for Mr. Sweet that I'm not interested in doing myself. Maybe that's selfish of me, but here's the thing. I do enough non-sexual things for Mr. Sweet that I don't necessarily enjoy (like watching hockey or sitting through the NFL draft) because it makes him happy. But sex is a whole 'nother ballgame. We each want to please and see our partner be pleased--that's a huge part of the turn on for us, with swinging or "just us" sex. So why in the world would I want him to do something that isn't going to excite/please him (or he ask that of me)?

 

Specifically regarding bi play, I only do that because it interests me. Yes, it turns Mr. Sweet on like crazy, but if I weren't enjoying it, then it would do nothing for him.

[celtic239 297]

I voted just about anything, with limits. I can only think of two things (1) S&M - there is no way I'm going to let someone tie me up and beat the shit out of me and (2) no male on male action.

[cupl4fun 361]

I think I would try most anything once. I might even try being with a guy once if she Really wanted me to, but then again maybe not. It doesn't appeal to me at all. I wouldn't force myself to do anything and I wouldn't ask her to do anything she didn't want to at least try. Oh yeah and no S&M for either of us.

[ktimephoenix 156]

I'm willing to try pretty much anything twice, so if Mrs P has an idea, it's generally explored.

 

I'm not Bisexual, and i would not have sex with a man just to fulfill Mrs P's fantasy. i wouldn't be adverse to finding two bisexual men to pleasure Mrs P so she could live out that fantasy (if that was her thing).

 

I am uncomfortable most of the time with Anal play. not mentally uncomfortable, but physically, it usually is uncomfortable, if not painful for me. there have been the odd occasion when it's felt great, but i wouldn't push my luck by letting Mrs P fuck me with a toy up there... again, if she wants to incorporate a guy into our swing life that is into that, then i have no qualms, but i personally cannot let her physically play that fantasy out on me.

 

The third thing that I draw the line at is anything illegal.

[ktimephoenix 156]

(1) S&M - there is no way I'm going to let someone tie me up and beat the shit out of me and

 

That's more Bondage and disipline from my understanding. S&M is more like torture, nipple clamps, pain etc. How about tying someone else up and whipping them? BDSM is like swinging. there are 100's of different aspects to it and ways to do it, so i personally wouldn't discount the entire "lifestyle" based on 1 stereotype... after all, they may have plenty to teach me

[JustMrJ 178]

I will have to vote with the minority on this. I would not expect her and I would not be expected to 'go through with something' I wasn't really comfortable with just to make her fantasy come true.

 

She and I have discussions about our fantasies and we know what each of us will and won't do right now.

 

If another woman wants to do something with me that my wife is uncomfortable with and it's a fantasy of mine, she's alright with that. And... vice-versa.

 

This rolls back around to that wonderful tool... communication.

[Tia Vampire 167]

Yes, I would do it for my SO. He would like to see me with another woman. I'm alright with it as long as I get to pick her out and she knows and understands that I have limits. I am not willing to eat another woman out or any kind of grinding genital together. Now that is something I will not do for him no matter what.

[lnk4u2 15]

K here I'm not sure if I would or not. If it is something that I have any interest in at all I might but if there is no interest at all I probably wouldn't. Since we have been married almost 25 years and know each other very well, tell each other our fantasies and have the same feelings about what we don't like to do it wouldn't be a problem.

[partyof2ormore 62]

I guess I would have to play it by ear, but about the only thing I WOULDN'T do for my wife is bi-play with another man.

 

I get turned on by seeing her get turned on. So if she is enjoying herself, I'm most likely going to enjoy it too.

[GerdOEvert 51]

There are different things to do in different places.

 

For instance, bi guy on guy is frowned on in the clubs, in my experience.

 

But at home or in a motel room, it is just acceptible.

 

I have both had oral sex with a guy with my wife and his girlfriend present, and given oral sex. Actually rather sexy to take a stiff cock and try to make it cumm.

 

If there were not an AIDS Scare, and has been for 20 years, I would like to try beingu buttfucked and having a load of cum deposited, just to see what it feels like.

 

Tried anal penetration once, and It just did not work. Too tight.