Would you perform a sexual activity just to please your partner?

[exhibi 15]

I dated a woman that wanted to watch me give another guy a BJ, not my thing, we met half way and I let another guy give me one.. I'd do it again.

[I'm his 15]

It would depend on the act itself. I do want to please him, but, I have limitations!

[I'm her's 15]

I don't think I could do something just to please her, though I would be able to find excitement in anything she wanted. When she gets excited I want to reflect that back to her.

[Swamprat 42]

I believe the we trust each other enough to be able to share fantasies with each other knowing each others limits. I would do anything that SHAMROCK would ask of me knowing that she would never exceed my limits.

[Guest az40scpl]

Wife and I already had this discussion...she knows that anything she wants to ask I will at least give it my best effort to make it happen.

[Guest Trellken]

My girl and I met online and talked a LOT about sex long before we actually met in person (I think that's one major benefit to a relationship like ours that started online - we talked and got to know each other for hours and hours long before ever actually getting physical). In those discussions, we talked a lot about our boundaries and what we do/don't have interests in.

 

We share most of the same rules:

 

The boundary that I made clear was that I don't want other men involved. I'm all for sharing her with women, even if that means me just watching while she plays with another woman.

 

There is one gray area that we've discussed a little and is still up for debate. While she's never expressed interest in playing with another man herself (and knows that I would not approve of that), she has said that she finds the thought of seeing another man giving me head and/or me returning the favor to be an incredible turn on. I'm still not sure where I stand on that one. On the one hand, I'm not gay and wouldn't even consider myself bi. On the other, I'm not repulsed by the idea and if it would really excite her I might agree to try it once (though I might need a couple of drinks first).

 

Other than that, we've been willing to look into and explore most things. She had always been very curious about being bound and spanked and dominated, but had never felt safe enough to try it. I made her feel safe and comfortable to start exploring it and she has loved it. We are both into voyeurism and exhibitionism so we've been to a swingers club twice to start exploring that (fucking on a bed poolside with people around also fucking and/or watching was pretty damned hot). She also did some light play with women on both of our visits.

 

The central theme of all the rules and limitations we have is that we'll try anything that excites each other so long as it doesn't make the other one overly uncomfortable or jealous. No matter how exciting something might be for me, if I can see she isn't enjoying it then it just isn't going to be enjoyable for me either. I think the same is true in return.

[AZCouple 99]

I would do just about anything for my wife. It is an absolute turn on for me to see her turned on.

[couplers 4,652]

Hello, Petra reporting. Yes, and I have. My current boyfriend, who was the one to take my virginity, shortly thereafter wanted to put his dick in my bum. I said OK, but was quite nervous. He was slow and gentle, but it was uncomfortable and a little painful the first time. We still do anal and it doesn't make me nervous anymore or hurt at all, but it also doesn't make me cum. I do, however, enjoy dp with bf and hubby and that always makes me cum.

 

Hubby has never asked for anything. He asks me what I want to do or makes suggestions, which is the way it should be. I would do pretty much anything for them or for Clair, even if I didn't think I would enjoy it the first time because they would never do anything to hurt me in any way and if they think they want it that's good enough for me.

[lotsoffun201 175]

Interesting responses to this thread. I (the Mr) was involved in the lifestyle for many years with the ex. I thought we had done just about everything we could. When I met the Mrs (online btw on a non lifestyle site) I told her about what we had done previously. She was never involved in anything like it, nor would have ever considered it.

 

Turns out she is actually the kinkier one of us since she and her ex had experimented and enjoyed things I would have never imagined. Never the less, she has enticed me to try some things which at first I thought I wouldn't enjoy, but actually do.

 

I on the other hand introduced her to the lifestyle (since she wanted to experiment with it and I never pushed the issue) so I guess one good turn deserves another.

[essexcouple 15]

Depends what it was, but I've done things for DH that don't do much for me, and vice-versa. It's all about give and take. I love to please him sometimes, so its a turn on seeing him horny, without me having to climax or want to do something that much myself.

[SsHubby 56]

We decided early that we would not do anything that we both weren't 100% onboard with. We can speak desires but we agree to accept "no" as a final answer.

[ClosetSwinger 112]

I have some limits but for the most part I would try JUST ABOUT anything if I thought it might fulfill a fantasy of my husbands.

[outofbounds 48]

Nothing turns me on like turning him on, even more so shocking him by how turned on he may be. I love an audience. I would do anything to please him as long as it was him asking honestly because he really wanted it, not just to make me do something or to punish me.

[Miss Sunshine 29]

If he asked I would do it as I know he would do for me as well.

[Coupleerotic22 1,419]

We know each other pretty well. We know each others "hell yeah" zone, comfort zone, "curious" zone and "hell no" zones pretty well. If we don't know, we ask. Things shift into and out of those zones at times as well. In fact I know of a few things that, depending on her mood, can be a hell no one week and a hell yeah another week. My zones are a little more constant.

 

I don't ask her do do anything in the her "hell no" zone. If she were doing something that was only for me, she got nothing out of it at all, then I would not enjoy it either. In fact I would feel bad. I know she feels the same.

 

I also do not do things that she would be uncomfortable with. For example, if she decided she did not want me to do anal with another woman, I wouldn't. It is just that simple.

 

To answer the question: She would not ask me to do anything I did not want to do. If it was in my "hell no" zone, I would not volunteer to do it, and most likely decline if asked.

[MN Tom 251]

We know each other pretty well and wouldn't even ask to do something that we know the other has no desire for whatsoever.

 

Anything else is an option though, and usually the first time we ask is in a fantasy type of discussion just between the two of us. We share fantasies and dreams and desires quite frequently, so that if one of those situations ever comes up, then we can spot it and let the other know or enjoy.

 

Likewise, we discuss some things that we do not like, and if those happen, we just say "to each their own" and move on.

 

For both of us it's not pleasing to the other if they aren't enjoying it too. So asking my wife to do something she doesn't want to do wouldn't be a benefit to me. Having someone else do it would be the option if it's something I really want to see.

[tdurden 15]

I would perform a sexual activity to please my partner, but only if I am getting something out of it as well. There is no point doing it unless 'both' parties are enjoying it.

[sunbuckus 3,567]

For myself, I would try some stuff if it only pleased Mr. Sunbuckus but not myself. I don't see either of us interested in the usual off-limit stuff.

 

But like the one Julie put forth...gangbang with midgets, I would have to pass unless I was blindfolded and didn't know any better. Or asking for me to play with a Hugh Hefner type guy.

 

As for pain stuff...it would really depend on my mood, the trust level between myself and the other playing, and the safety word rule that we can stop if it's too much.

 

Maybe we should make a thread about oddball play situations that repulse us and if we would do it for our partner's pleasure!

[prairieshadows 95]

I know for us, Alicia does something for me now and then that I know she doesn't like, and that's giving me blow jobs.

 

Early on in our relationship, she didn't have a problem with giving them, but I expected her to do it all the time, and it ruined it for her.

 

She still gives them (and very well I might add), but not as frequent as she used to.

 

Now as much as I do enjoy them, I've had no complaints really about not getting them as often.

 

I think when it comes to sexual activities that couples engage in, it should be something that both are willing to explore.

 

An example that I know led to a couple we know getting divorced, they swapped with another couple because he wanted to. She went along with it to make him happy, and it really tore her up. (We did not swing with this couple.) But she basically felt that she wasn't enough for him, that's why he wanted to try swinging.

 

It's a big reason why when we talk with couples who are thinking about trying swinging, that they make sure it's something that they BOTH want to do, not just one or the other. It has to be a decision they make together, because there are so many emotions involved.

 

Anyways, that's my take on it.

[Cancuple-he 37]

Hmmm, I think I would do pretty much anything to satisfy Mrs. Cancuple's sexual desires.

 

(The rewards are far reaching and returned on an exponential level! )

[blknplumpnurse 17]

In the past I have, and right now I've put my foot down. If you aren't willing to fulfill MY fantasy, I'm not going to entertain yours

[curiosity2kinky 19]

I would give another guy oral and might swallow if she desired. Nothing more.

[jim101 19]

I am pretty open to just about anything she would like to try except anything that causes actual harm to her or myself. I also am not bi curious, so that is a no for me too.

[intuition897 2,179]

I would probably try most things Mr. intuition suggested at least once - to give it a fair shot, because you never know what might turn your crank. Then again, if it's something I know for certain would never turn me on, and in fact turns me off quite a bit, I would have to decline. Happily, that's sort of what swinging is for: getting it on with all kinds of other people with varied sexual talents and interests.

[Guest]

I never thought I would but I read a book once, Anne Rice’s Sleep Beauty Trilogy. In it, after the prince awakens Beauty, he takes her off to his Kingdom but trains her to be his sex slave. Part of this training, she had to do various sexual things such as stand naked while men touched her. The book so turned me on that I told hubby, then BF, that I wanted to be similarly trained.

 

So, summarizing quickly, we started small but I found doing each such thing more exciting than the last and now, yes, gladly perform whatever activity he asks.

[Shore2Please 612]

I would say that everything I did for the first time was more to please my partner. I am sure I did things because I wanted to do it. The guy was more sexually satisfied than I was. I took me quite awhile to finally be satisfied myself. I have no regrets about my experimenting when I was younger

[scots 33]

i WOULDN'T SUCK A GUYS COCK.

 

Don't knock it until you try it.

[couplers 4,652]

Alura said:

Neither of us would ever do S&M, bondage, water sports, etc.

 

In our poly family we are the same, except Lora and I pee on each other sometimes when no one else is around.

 

Lora and I have a weird relationship. We are lovers, but also rivals unlike the relationship between any other two in the family.

 

When we're alone and have the time and are in the mood where one of us will start with a taunt, if the other responds, we fight. We insult each other and hit and pull hair, we scream.

 

One of us will get the other to submit, it's about 50/50, and pee on her in the shower or bathtub. Then we shower together, kiss and have sex.

 

Since one of the things we fight about is who David loves more and who is better for him, we once tried having a fighting encounter with him there.

 

It did increase the intensity for both of us (as Lora and I discussed calmly later), but David found it disturbing. So we just do it by ourselves now (and answer the question later, "How did you get that bruise?").

[padoc 1,703]

disturbing is a good word.

[couplers 4,652]

padoc said:

disturbing is a good word.

 

Sometimes I think about it and try to rationalize. There has been no other S&M stuff in any of my relationships.

 

I've told the story here in the past about the unusal circumstances of Lora joining our poly family: Lora was engaged to David and broke up with him because of her family pressures; she's black while David is white and her family wanted her to marry a black man.

 

Subsequently the poly stuff started when David and I married while I kept my boyfriend. I loosened up later and let David play with other women (and I started to explore my lesbian side), and we both fell in love with Clair who joined our family, making four. 

 

ThenI befriended Lora, meeting her at the gym and knowing she was David's ex-fiancee. She didn't hesitate accepting my proposals to reacquaint herself with David, with the bonus for me that she was agressively interested in lesbian play.

 

She had a boyfriend at the time, Walter, who she told what she was doing with us. He was open-minded about Lora not being monogamous, liked being invited to play with the rest of us, watching Lora in action and getting to screw two other women.

 

It was so good that Lora and Walter got married (with her family's approval of a professional black man), and they continued to play with us. Lora told me that she thought she had navigated it all perfectly, married a great guy and still had a relationship with David.

 

As time went on she found herself wanting David more, wanting to live with him.

 

Then Clair accidently got pregnant by David and I had a child "pot luck" with both David and my boyfriend (turned out to be David's as well).

 

Lora at this point decided she wanted what she wanted, divorced Walter and moved in with us. Unlike Clair, with whom both Lora and I have a mutually deferential relationship, Lora sometimes would challenge and denigrate me. She let me know that David wanted to marry her first, said I was a whore for fucking my boyfriend and Walter, a spineless bitch for letting Clair and later her have David's child.

 

I'm not one to run from a threat, challenge or insult, so I gave it back as good as Lora gave, at first starting verbally and over time escalating to physical fighting and peeing. But all the while we are always passionate lovers, not like the others where it can sometimes be just knocking out a couple of orgasms. (I shouldn't complain.)

 

It is twisted I know, but I love that woman, and in real life she is my advocate and supporter. And those nights when She and I sleep with David, thinking about the next time I get her alone...

[Butchj 65]

I have always been in female dominant relationships we have always mutually agreed that we would never force each other to do anything that was not safe or hurt each other or someone else.

 

My wife now has forbidden me to do some of the things I’ve done in the past mostly out of safety reasons.

 

We couldn’t compromise our careers doing some things sexually that would cost dearly. We have to keep a monogamous cover protecting both of us. Yet there are things that we have done behind closed doors together that I never thought I would ever do.

 

My wife is really good at calling all the shots and is definitely a cock tease and someone who has total control over my sexuality.

[Guest]

I would and I have. Turning him on, turns me on. Being told “what I have to do” is also a turn on for me so it all works.

[Judy39 145]

I would. Then again none of my long-term partners ever pushed me to do something truly weird and very far out of my comfort zone, so it's based on that reality.

 

But if I do something to please my partner and don't enjoy it myself enough to want to do it again, then that's that. It won't happen second time.

[adamgunn 1,460]

If I was asked to do something, I'd think about it for a moment. If it grossed me out (and I'm a pretty tolerant person) I'd probably say, "What about . . ."

 

Like many others, if it didn't gross me out, I'd try it. If I didn't like what I was doing, I'd stop.

 

Hey, it's MY body . . .

[let's do it again 414]

I have a partner that likes to strap on a cock and fuck my ass so I will do about anything but have my limits. BDSM I am not really into,  but will do, I guess scat play is a definite no. I have plenty of kinks, analingus and piss play so I am pretty much into anything.