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cataryna

What would entice you to attend a party?

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Hello all of you sexy people,

 

We own a group in New Orleans and hold on-premise parties. There is another on-premise club in the area that is open several days a week, whereas we only have parties once a month. Competition in the area is small, but we're finding that because the other club is more established people are hesitant about going somewhere new. We believe that our venue is more friendly and less pressure to play, but still hot as hell. We have an indoor heated pool and two hot-tubs, while the other club does not. The other club has more play areas than us. We both have rooms available to rent. We offer a full buffet at our parties, while the other club does not offer one to the scale that ours is. We offer door prizes, free entrances, gift certificates to local restaurants, games and other prizes while the other club does not. While we've had decent turnouts we would love to have more people show up.

 

We have definitely noticed a decline in attendance at all swinger events in the area since Katrina and are hoping that this is a temporary thing and that people will eventually come back to play. We're afraid that if we don't have more people showing up we may be forced to close shop.

 

So we're asking for help here...What are some of the things that would attract you to a certain party?

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Hi cataryna,

 

Good luck with your business! I hope you have much success!

 

What are some of the things that would attract you to a certain party?

 

I liked what you described regarding the buffet, games, indoor heated pool and hot tubs, door prizes & gift certificates, etc. Sounds like fun.

 

I would also be looking for:

 

Membership-only (this screens out people just coming in to stare, and a lot of the married cheaters). A members-only club would take note of driver's licenses, etc. There is an annual membership fee + a small fee to enter each party. You said that you have "free entrances": what does this mean? I'd rather pay for the sake of security than deal with the free crowd.

 

Security on staff, bags checked at entrance, no cameras or cell-phones allowed.

 

Clean towels provided (a nice touch).

 

Lockers available.

 

A good dance floor with good music.

 

Plenty of tables/chairs around (some don't have nearly enough).

 

At least a couple of bartenders.

 

Non-smoking, at least in the main areas of the club.

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Hi cataryna,

 

Tybee made some great suggestions!

 

Feel free to send us a Personal Message with the name of your club. We get down to New Orleans once every couple of years and would love to check out your club.

 

For us,

 

- The Hot Tub and pool sound great!

 

- Like Tybee said, the dance floor is a big consideration for us. We love to dance.

 

- We also like clubs that have swings and/or a Sybian.

 

- Be open (hours of operation) as late as possible.

 

Best of luck to you! Hope this was helpful.

 

John

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Thanks for the response Tybee

 

To answer your questions

 

1. Membership only--While we do not ask our members to pay a membership fee, all people who attend must RSVP on either our yahoo group or on SLS and we don't allow walk ins unless we know them. We do allow a few single males, 4 only, all of whom have to have 2 SLS certifications, which we verify through contacting the certs and screening them etc.

 

2. Free entrances means that we give away free entrances for future parties every once in a while as a door prize, they are non-transferable.

 

3. The security staff is pretty much us as we're constantly working our way throughout the guests making sure they're okay. I try to stop and talk to at least everyone.

 

4. Because of the pool there are towels available...and all of the rooms have their own towels.

 

5. We don't have a dance floor. Our parties are held in the large pool room of the B&B, there's plenty of room to dance if people wish to dance though, a large bar area, plenty of seating areas.

 

6. We have a very competent bartender.

 

7. There is no smoking in the rooms, but there is in the large pool room where the party is held.

 

We are not to the scale of the other club, it's much larger and has more of a nightclub feel to it, whereas ours has more of a house party feel to it considering that the majority of the party takes place in the very large pool house, with rooms set aside for play.

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As one that has been holding and promoting parties for many years I would suggest working hard on the Promotion area of your parties.

 

You sound like you have a good thing going and I have been to NO many times and know the other place you are talking about.

 

I spoke with friends in NO that have been around the Lifestyle for way to many years and they have never heard of your parties.

 

You need to get the word out more. Get a real Internet site and even a yahoo group to go with it. NO people are very active in Yahoo but to get the out of town people you need a real site. Many tourists want to see something that makes you look legit.

 

Also, you do not appear to be listed in the Club Listings here. That is a start, there is a lot of swingers on this web site. :EG:

 

You might always want to join NASCA. http://www.nasca.com They don't really do much for you but there is a lot of traffic on their web site by people looking for clubs all over the country. That has been a good outlet for us over the years.

 

Good luck to you!

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Thanks for the response John and VegasLee.

 

John, our hours are longer than the other club, we begin at 8pm and go pretty much until the last person leaves. We don't really have a "closing" time. Usually most everyone is gone by 4p.m.

 

VegasLee

 

The reason they haven't heard about it is because it was under another name before being run by another couple. Southern Escapades, itself, is a new name and started being used in January. I'm surprised that your friends have never heard of The Dive Inn though. I thought everyone in the lifestyle in New Orleans knew about The Dive Inn is the only clothing optional licensed B & B in New Orleans and is where our parties are held. We do have a website and a yahoo group. If you click on my profile both here and on SLS you'll find the link for it. As for the club listing here, I've only been a member here for a few days and submitted the club listing when I signed up. I'm guessing they have not listed it yet. We are listed on multiple sites and linked on many yahoo groups. I have looked at the NACSA site and actually it helped me when I was just beginning to swing. We are looking into becoming listed there as well.

 

I guess the main thing is I just don't understand why we're not having a bigger response. I see and hear all the discord and disappointment with the other clubs in our area, so I don't get why people wouldn't want to try someplace new.

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My first suggestion would go along with Lee's regarding the web site. I would suggest paying Godaddy their $4.95 a month to get rid of their free hosting banner, it would give you a much more professional feel than it does now as a free site.

 

I don't know if it would work for you to not be, but we don't attend clubs that require an RSVP. Like a lot of people, we have very busy lives, we usually decide to go to a club less than an hour or so before we get there, so RSVP isn't an option. If the competing club requires RSVP also it might not be as much of a problem, but if they don't that might be a large reason for the low attendance.

 

The biggest thing if we are considering a club though, is do they have good music and a dance floor. One of our local clubs has a hot tub, actual beds to play on, private play areas, and is much more up-scale than the other two clubs in town. The other two clubs have neither hot tubs nor beds and only have public play rooms, but they do have a dance floor which the first one does not. The clubs with a dance floor are by far our preferred clubs and judging by the size of their parties, most others feel the same way. While the first club has an area where you can dance if you want to, it just isn't the same as a real dance floor and nobody ever dances there. The problem is that after you spend a few minutes in the hot tub you are pretty much done, their is just nothing else to do except wait around for your turn at the pool table. Even though a lot of folks don't like to dance it has one big advantage over any other activity your club may offer, it encourages interaction between guests. Some might argue that you go to the club for sex, not dancing. That argument falls apart though when you consider that very few couples go to a club and hook up with someone for sex every time they go, in fact, in my experience most couples don't even hook up successfully half the time. So unless you give those people something to do besides standing around being a wallflower, they might come a few times but eventually will opt for the other club that has dancing no matter how nice your club is or how good the food.

 

Good luck.

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Sorry, i had not checked your profile. I just asked around with some friends if they knew of a place like you had described without giving them a name and they said no. Had not heard of it. Most of them are not into the "nudist" thing. Most places that is much different. Nudists do not tend to like swingers much. We helped fun a nudist place along with the swingers parties at a different location and the nudists ripped us up on their message boards because we are swingers. :surrender

 

NASCA is a good way to go. It is cheap to join then they will list you.

 

We found years ago, we never talk about "other" clubs, good or bad. You will find that someone will be unhappy with any club no matter how great it is and some will love some places that you would not let you do go to. Just the way it is. We never compare. Always sell on your own merits no matter what.

 

We manage one of the largest, oldest and busiest swing parties in the county yet you will find negative posts on the net about the place. Not many but you will find them. Just the way it is. Not all places are for everyone. There is even another place in town that we suggest to some people once we talk to them and can feel that our party is NOT for them. The other place has called us and Thanked us for sending so many people to them. It was people we knew would not be happy with us so why not guide them the right direction. You will not want everyone at your party. :)

 

You sound like you have a good thing going. I believe you just need to keep getting the word our there. It takes many, many years before a place does well and you get a lot of people for each party. If you see you are not getting a lot of the locals returning then you will need to look at what you doing because then you have a problem if you can not retain them.

 

You are also going to find that every four to five years you will have a 50% to 75% turn over in your crowd of regulars. People move, drop out of the lifestyle, divorce, etc. That is not something you can control but it does happen. Half of our crowd is regulars and half is tourists and we have seen that turn over many times in 25 years.

 

Good luck to you.

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For us it would be entertainment. Something unique that other clubs don’t have.

That is why I go to Scores over any other strip club in Las Vegas, they have stage acts such as contortionist, acrobats etc…

The last couple times I went to a swingers club was because one place offered a stand up comedian and the second place had a magician.

It gave us a chance to sit with other couples, chat and laugh. What a great Ice Breaker. I know this is not for everyone but it sure was fun.

Hugs and Hissessss,

Maria

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2. Free entrances means that we give away free entrances for future parties every once in a while as a door prize, they are non-transferable.

 

That sounds like a cool prize. :)

 

3. The security staff is pretty much us as we're constantly working our way throughout the guests making sure they're okay. I try to stop and talk to at least everyone.

 

That sounds like very good hostessing, but not really like security. There is nobody who minds the door the whole time? Checking ID's, ages, checking to make sure the only people coming in are those who are supposed to be there? If somebody gets out of hand, is there somebody who can ask them to leave, and enforce it?

 

5. We don't have a dance floor. Our parties are held in the large pool room of the B&B, there's plenty of room to dance if people wish to dance though, a large bar area, plenty of seating areas.

 

7. There is no smoking in the rooms, but there is in the large pool room where the party is held.

 

Do they really dance there? I was thinking the same thing that Goodtimes said, that if there's not a dance floor, people usually won't dance even if they want to.

 

We are non-smokers, and since there is only one room to socialize in and it's the one room where smoking is allowed, that means that non-smokers must be inhaling smoke for hours if they want to be social and meet people. We might give your club a try if we were locals, but we'd go in knowing that we might have to leave early if it's that smoky. But, this is us. Perhaps there are many more smokers than non-smokers at your party and this wouldn't affect your overhead that much.

 

We are not to the scale of the other club, it's much larger and has more of a nightclub feel to it, whereas ours has more of a house party feel to it considering that the majority of the party takes place in the very large pool house, with rooms set aside for play.

 

Do people rent their own rooms at that B&B for the night?

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Maria, THanks for the suggestion. I have been thinking about hiring a burlesque dancer to see how i goes over with our group.

 

 

That sounds like very good hostessing, but not really like security. There is nobody who minds the door the whole time? Checking ID's, ages, checking to make sure the only people coming in are those who are supposed to be there? If somebody gets out of hand, is there somebody who can ask them to leave, and enforce it?

 

Yes, there's always someone at the door, whether it be me, Scott or a friend that helps me out. We have found that anyone who is going to show up is usually there by 11 pm and yes there's one of us doing all of those things. We have never had anything happen...but if it were, we're perfectly capable of taking care of anything that could come up.

 

Do they really dance there? I was thinking the same thing that Goodtimes said, that if there's not a dance floor, people usually won't dance even if they want to.

 

No they don't...maybe one or two couples at any given time...but most just dance where they're standing.

 

We are non-smokers, and since there is only one room to socialize in and it's the one room where smoking is allowed, that means that non-smokers must be inhaling smoke for hours if they want to be social and meet people. We might give your club a try if we were locals, but we'd go in knowing that we might have to leave early if it's that smoky. But, this is us. Perhaps there are many more smokers than non-smokers at your party and this wouldn't affect your overhead that much.

 

I guess it's about 50/50. The pool room is VERY large...envision a room the size of a small banquet hall with a ceiling 2.5 to 3 stories tall. Smoke is not a problem or at least I've heard no complaints about it being a problem.

 

Do people rent their own rooms at that B&B for the night?

 

Yes.

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The pool room is VERY large...envision a room the size of a small banquet hall with a ceiling 2.5 to 3 stories tall. Smoke is not a problem or at least I've heard no complaints about it being a problem.

 

That does sound very big and very well ventilated! :)

 

It's nice that people can rent their own B&B room on the premises. Not everybody wants to do group or public activities. Your set-up makes it very nice for more private moments.

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I have been DJing at an area club and have had quite a few people comment they keep coming back for the good music. I chalk it up to variety. Many clubs play primarily one genre. Same as swingers come in all ages, shapes and sizes; the music needs to be a mix of many styles. Something for everyone.

 

Mr.PL

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"I don't know if it would work for you to not be, but we don't attend clubs that require an RSVP. Like a lot of people, we have very busy lives, we usually decide to go to a club less than an hour or so before we get there, so RSVP isn't an option. If the competing club requires RSVP also it might not be as much of a problem, but if they don't that might be a large reason for the low attendance. " ...goodtimes

.........

 

I agree. We haven't been to a club because of the distance from our home to any club...but when we travel, and we do a lot, we have talked about attending a club we've heard about, only to find out we needed to RSVP. That isn't usually an option for us as when it's just the two of us, we usually don't know where we'll end up that night, or what we'll feel like doing until a few hours before going out. It's hard for us to plan things, also, so being able to go to a club spur of the moment would be great for us.

 

Not sure if this would work for you. Does the other club require an RSVP? If they do...what about having one night where RSVPs aren't required...and advertise that walk ins are welcome for this particular date and see if that improves anything. I guess I'm not very knowledgable in this area...but just a few thoughts on what WE would like.

 

Good luck and I wish you great success in your business!

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Since you are in a great tourist hotspot I agree with a few previous posts, advertisement is the key, nationally as well as locally. When we travel we check Nasca and google a city to see what clubs are there. In fact, we are planning on hitting your town this spring. RSVP is not a problem, but make sure to accommodate out of towners, have some sort of special deal for people that will only be there for a week or less. Personally I think your sitting on a gold mine, work it properly and you should end up with a great place.

 

Good Luck

Mr. Lol

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You have been given a lot of really good advice here. One thing that I can add is if you are dealing with a competitor you may be able to cater to a different group that doesn’t feel welcome there. A new club has been started in my area and they have done an excellent job of packing the place out every month. They are even using the same location as their competitor that also meets once a month. The competitor tries to focus on a diverse group. This new club is after the older people. They have a lot of food and the dance music is all slow dancing with a focus on socialization. The wife and I don’t fit into this group but I talked to the owner and he was blunt enough to tell me that this group is where the easy money is. He said that once he got it big enough he might start one for the younger crowd. BTW, he spends a lot of time on SLS sending out personal invitations to people that he thinks would enjoy his club. If he can convince one new couple to come they will bring all their friends.

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hey catryna do yall own the Dive inn in new orleans.... I just went to the web site it looks like a nice place, in fact we are trying to arrange to come to new orleans this fri just as 1 night get away, but it has a 2 night min. it looks like with the right people it would be a lot of fun, its not very often yuu can find a clothing optional place not worring about the public and without going to jamaica or something

 

airbrushman

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heres an idea how about set up a party for people like us and nubies ....kinda "break the ice party" with a few veterians to help eaz the way. like I said we would like the games (kinda anxious to try the dvd intense game) but not sure on the full swap but maybe the soft play thing.I think new orleans would be a great place, and by the web site the Dive inn looks like a good place to have it.

any input...whacha think cataryna

 

airbrushman

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Dont compete, join them get to know who goes where and how often, not sure of restrictions but look into advertizement in local alternative mag and dont chinch quarter to half page ad, hold specialty events ,Costume , Pimp and Hoe contests etc,furry is growing by leaps and bounds. make the atmosphere single friendly offer free condiments, specialty condoms, oils and such. dress code is needed but a tie and jacket is outrageous. find a nice medium. by no means do not turn away just politely inform.

 

What kind of music is the other guys playing, high tempo is cool at first but if i have to ask "What?" 4 times it a deal breaker. open more regularly even if no shows in the beginning of course this is costly and will put you in the hole quicker but if you have no business that is inevitable anyway. Most comercial operations start from strong private groups, possibly downsize untill it seems feasable.

 

would tagging cars at other locations with info on your new club hours and specials be over the line, how far are you willing to go?

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      I knew I wouldn’t last long because I had almost cum multiple times just watching her. With some of the crowd still watching I got undressed, and slid my wet with pre-cum cock into my wife’s cum-loaded pussy. I fucked her until she started cumming. Her cunt convulsed so hard that it squeezed my cock and made me start to cum. I came in her pussy, mixing my cum with my wife’s new fuck buddies cum. I pulled my cock out and watched it all slowly slide down her ass. She got up and went over to our young fuck buddy and she gave him a long passionate kiss and said thank you for such a great time. He gave her one last little finger fucking and handed her a card of his if we were ever in the area again.
       
      He left after he got dressed and we got cleaned up and went out to the main room. I had multiple people including women and even the bartender say that my wife was one of the women they would like to fuck if they ever got a chance after seeing her in action. I guess I’m the lucky one here.
       
      Later that night when we were driving to our resort, she slipped her hand down pants and put her fingers in her pussy. She brought them out and rubbed them on my face. She smiled and said we gotta do this again sometime as we pulled into the parking lot to call it a night.
       
      And what a night it was.
    • By SPaige24
      My husband and I have been together for almost 10 years. I have always been bi- curious, but kept it as secret until the last month. Little did I know that he had a small feeling (thanks to a few drunk nights with my friend). Our marriage is very strong, and we are very opened with each other. I told him that I wanted to have a have sexual encounter with another female. He is on board, and we even talked about a MFM threesome as well.
       
      Here is my issue... How do I find someone? That friend is no longer a friend, I can't do dating apps because of my job, and I personally don't want someone we know. I have looked into Swinger Clubs, and I realize that finding a bisexual/lesbian female who is single is hard. We are opened to a couple if need be. I just want my husband there and or involved.
       
      My question is... What is it like going to a swingers club? Will there be people our age (27-30), are "predators" real, and how do I find a club? We are located in Washington, PA.
    • By AdamGunn2
      It was a fairly typical night at D.J.s Island, an early autumn evening. Mary and I hadn’t set anything up in advance, we’d decided to go almost at the last moment. From the second we entered the door our radar was beaming across the club, searching for a couple that might be searching for what we were also interested in - an enjoyable tryst.
       
      Mary took a few minutes to change into what she called a ‘trolling outfit.’ As I remember, that night it was a black babydoll with a loose bodice, thong, low heels. Many men admired her legs as I checked the forty or so women, many as scantily clad as my wife. None of our regular playmates seemed to be in attendance that evening, but we had our customs, we weren’t concerned. Perhaps an hour and a half later, I sat at a table next to the dance floor, Mary was on her feet, on the parquet, moving her body, seeing if anyone would move in. A slow sequence of men approached her, danced with her. Some would take liberties such as moving their hands under her garment, feeling the small of her back, perhaps place their palm on the roundness of her ass.
       
      I’d seen this many times before, I waited for one of two reactions.
       
      The first was that she’d spin away from the man; it signified she wasn’t interested in what he had to offer.
       
      The second was that she’d get closer, I’d watch her whisper in his ear. I knew the question, “Where’s your wife?” Some of them would shake their heads, they were attending as one of the few single men the club allowed, and when they received Mary’s response, they’d move away - that’s not what we were looking for at the moment.
       
      But the man might indicate where his wife was dancing a few feet away. When this kind of thing happened, Mary would glance to me and give our special signal - she’d put one hand on the back of her head, one on her stomach. When I got the cue, I’d come out, we’d dance as a foursome.
       
      As I approached, a man grasped the elbow of a tall attractive lady who was more modestly dressed, at least for the club. There was no conversation on the dance floor, the heavy volume of music and the thumping of the bass wouldn’t allow for speech. But I could tell the woman was interested in me, the four of us paired off and I often found myself facing this vixen. It was obvious they were as interested in us as I was in them, I could tell by the way Mary was rubbing against the man that she felt the same.
       
      After a couple of songs, Mary led the way off the floor, holding his hand, leading us off into a corner away from the speakers. As we sat, the man said, “I’m Ed, this is my wife, Marilyn.”
       
      Marilyn and I softly shook hands, I believe she raised the hem of her skirt to give me a view of her upper thighs. Ed had no problem seeing Mary’s legs, or where they met - she was sitting so that the babydoll was gathered to her side, leaning forward so her globes were exposed to his view.
       
      “Do you come here often?” Ed asked.
       
      “Every few weeks,” I responded, “you?”
       
      “This is our first time here.” Mary gave him a look that asked for further info. “We’re just starting this,” he admitted.
       
      Marilyn picked it up. “We’ve only had one time with a couple of friends. We liked it, heard about this place, decided to see if we could get into more trouble.”
       
      “Trouble’s our middle name,” I joked.
       
      Our conversation continued, where do you live, what movies have you seen lately, etc. It was a screen, of course, we were all calculating if the four of us would be pleasurable bedmates. I paid my attention to Marilyn, my wife had told me numerous times not to worry about her, she can take care of herself. My hand found Marilyn’s knee, she smiled at me, encouraged me to reach a tad higher. We bent towards each other, our mouths met.
       
      Marilyn opened her lips to me, the kiss was ardent, her mouth moist. She licked at my upper lip, her hand fondled the back of my neck. Our tongues clashed, promising cupidity, mimicking what I presumed our bodies might be doing in a few scant moments.
       
      We broke for a moment, Marilyn invited, “Would you guys want to go to one of the rooms?”
       
      I, of course, was all for it, but then I heard Mary. “Uh, not right now. But thanks.”
       
      We’ve always had the guideline that if one person doesn’t want to do something, she speaks for both of us. Regretfully, I pecked at Marilyn’s lips a last time, we stood, went separate ways.
       
      “You’re not upset, are you?” Mary asked me.
       
      “Of course not, not at all. You’re not in the mood?”
       
      “Oh, I’m in the mood all right, just not with Ed.”
       
      “Something wrong with him?” I asked.
       
      “I tried to get him interested,” Mary revealed, “but his kiss was a little cold, indifferent. I put my hand on his leg, he was too busy watching you and Marilyn, he never responded. My guess is that if we went into a room, he’d be watching you two, I’m not even sure he’d get hard for me.” It was a reasonable thought, it had happened to us a couple times before. “Hope you don’t mind, bet she’d have been a firecracker.”
       
      “Maybe. But you’re a firecracker too.”
       
      We headed back to the dance floor, in search of another couple.
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