Not cumming during play time

[lost_j1 5]

May sound a little odd, but I am going to ask it anyways. I know and I am bad about this that I am a giver during sex. I love to please the women at all cost. Need it be from oral, fingers, penis, vaginal, anal, I love to have the women enjoy them selves. I have yet since cum from any other women then my wife during play. Last weekend we went to a house party and fucked off and on with several friends for like 7 hours and never had the urge. I finally jerked off before bed just so I could get some good sleep. I love playing with the women and wow what a party it was. I just wanted to know how common this is with everyone else? I believe that the lifestyle is not always about how you finish , but the erotic ride along the way... I have read before that this is common with some people, but ya never know to ya ask right? Maybe it's just after 16 years of marraige that we know how to push each others buttons. But how common is it with everyone else? Thanks for any replies..

 

 

 

JAY!!!

[couple4fun2821 15]

Yea, I read that and thought I wrote it. LOL... That is pretty much the exact same as me... Common? no idea but I dont mind it.. I always end you with my wife or jerking off at the end of play to cum. I guess if I put the effort into it I could cum with one of the playmates, but that, to me, isn't why I am there.

[lost_j1 5]

Shit you have the same answer as me... I read it again said that's what I would have replied with.. I guess it does happen more often... Thanks for the relpy..

 

JAY!!!

[WesternSwing 504]

I know of several husbands who don't cum with Mrs. WS or take a long time to cum with her, but cum rather quickly with their own wife. I think nerves can get the better of you, especially in an atmosphere like swinging which is supposed to be a no-no.

 

Mr. WS

[TXCPL1137 15]

I do delay cumming at a party. For me cumming is the end of feelings for a while. Most men have a errection, then when they ejaculate, it goes away.

 

To delay orgasim keeps the action going longer.

 

Now 7 hours is a bit much. Tell the room how you delay that long?

 

As for anal, that is a death wish. More disease has passed around from anal than any other sexual forum. To be blunt, I do not want my wife sucking something that has been in a rectum.

 

We do not play with people who are anal outside their marriage. Maybe this can be a post. TXcpl1137

[sexcupid 809]

Speaking for my experience...I am usually the one not cumming during play time. My SO is usually a tough nut to crack anyway (it generally takes him a while to get there when we are having sex)...eh, not too much of a pun intended there.

 

I mean, things are feeling really good...but of the few swaps we've done, I've had one orgasm from a play partner (and I'll say it was very good facelick ). We're going to a party this weekend...I'll see if my luck improves...lol

 

Maria

[havefuninsun 122]

I would feel like I didn't do it for the guy if he didn't cum. So then, I wouldn't be pleased --

[oddcouple 17]

Dito Havefuninsun thank you. I would not enjoy myself if I my male partner didn't cum. As for Mr. Odd, he holds out quite a while......but 7 hours? .

We don't do parties, just select friends and aren't into it for marathon sex. We like it fast and hard!

[Chicup 42]

I love pleasing my female partners, but part of it for both of us would be ending it properly

 

If I had to jack off after 7 hours of play, I'd be rather annoyed.

[Tia Vampire 167]

We have it in our profile, that we do not like sloppy seconds and we would not do it to our play partner either. During full swap, we don't mind trying a little of this and a little of that, but when it is time to finish, we rather do it with each other. We save our orgasms for each other. They are not something we share with our playmates. Plus we both aim to please too. Without an orgasm, makes for more play time.

[lost_j1 5]

Thanks for all the input from everyone. When I say 7 hours it breaks down to this. First hour was a six people orgy, then took like a 30 minute relax and skinny dip. The next half hour we had sex in the pool between the same group. So that accounts for the first 2 hours** Then we went back the room for 1 and half of another group orgy. Then after that I was with another women by myself in the room for 30 minutes.**2+1.5+.5=4 hours** Then we all headed to the pool to cool off. So another 1 hour in the pool passing each other around with the rest of party. **5 hours** Then we the group of 6 went back to the room for another 1 hour and had our third orgy passing the three women between us 3 guys. **6 hours** After that our group broke up because it was like 2:00 in the morning. So then I went back down to the pool and found a couple for a threesome. My wife went to bed and told me it was fine that I went down to the pool. So I played with this couple for about hour. Hence 7 hours of play with like 7 different women multiple of times. Yes, there were like 5-10 minute breaks as we walked from the pool back to the room. But, at the last threesome and I still have not came. So I just jerked off and went to bed. Like I said it was a blast. About 25 couples were at this party. Thanks again for all the replies..

 

JAY!!!

[Chicup 42]

We have it in our profile, that we do not like sloppy seconds and we would not do it to our play partner either. During full swap, we don't mind trying a little of this and a little of that, but when it is time to finish, we rather do it with each other. We save our orgasms for each other. They are not something we share with our playmates. Plus we both aim to please too. Without an orgasm, makes for more play time.

 

I'm one of those men who is rather annoyed with himself if he can't get the woman off.

 

'No stop, I don't want to O with anyone besides my man.' would be a big turn off.

[good times 991]

with Chicup, if a woman told me I couldn't have an orgasm with her, I would pass. I have to say that when I am having sex with someone, my ultimate goal is for both of us to have an orgasm, if that isn't in the game plan then I don't see the point in having sex in the first place. To me that would be like going to Disneyland and not going on any rides.

 

As to the OP's original question, I have in the past played so long that I just didn't have the energy to reach an orgasm, after that time I made a vow to myself never to do that again. While I would somewhat agree that the lifestyle isn't all about how you finish, if I don't finish, for whatever reason, I am going to be disappointed.

[Tia Vampire 167]

It's not that we don't want to. Neither of us can get to that point with other people. I've tried stimulating myself, have him talk to me, or just going with the flow, but nothing works. So we just save them for each other. Sometime after being with a couple, we end up going back into the room with each other to get to that sweet point of ecstasy.

[tribbles 490]

To me that would be like going to Disneyland and not going on any rides.

 

 

I've been really close to that. But then I've been to Disneyland many times. Just going to walk around and look at people, rides, decorations and the atomsphere can be a blast. Gee, we have done that at swing clubs and had fun that way too.

 

Every party is different. Some, one or both of us cum at, sometimes we neither one do. Sometimes we do it at home after and sometimes we don't. It's pretty easy to ask "did you want to cum?" if we didn't at the party. A "no, tomorrow. Wanna sleep now" is an acceptable answer too. So is masturbating if needed to go to sleep.

[Chicup 42]

Not to call you out but....

 

We have it in our profile, that we do not like sloppy seconds and we would not do it to our play partner either. During full swap, we don't mind trying a little of this and a little of that, but when it is time to finish, we rather do it with each other. We save our orgasms for each other. They are not something we share with our playmates. Plus we both aim to please too. Without an orgasm, makes for more play time.

 

vrs....

 

 

It's not that we don't want to. Neither of us can get to that point with other people. I've tried stimulating myself, have him talk to me, or just going with the flow, but nothing works. So we just save them for each other. Sometime after being with a couple, we end up going back into the room with each other to get to that sweet point of ecstasy.

 

Now I can understand a woman having a hard time orgasming with someone else for a lot of reasons. Some women require years of 'study' to get off properly. As for the male though, not so much. I've had occasions where I've had a hard time finishing due to condoms or what not, but guys are pretty basic in their orgasms. There aren't any books I'm aware of on how to make a man cum, once you mastered one penis you have mastered them all so to speak.

 

So is your first post the correct version or the second one. I know this seems confrontational because I'm calling you out so to speak but its your business on how you swing, so I don't think of you less if you decide not to 'share' that part. Generally we see very eye to eye on things and if you were closer and my wife wasn't an old 33 year old ( ) I'd have asked a while ago if you wanted to get together

 

Edit: I'd add I posted this while putting off going down to hit the weight bench....sigh.....off I go.

[Tia Vampire 167]

Yes, I see where it looks like I changed the story, but things happen in phases. I just said what I ment and not what I ment to say. When we first started exchanging partner, I noticed that i could not cum with someone else and one of our rules is that safe sex is a must. My fiance does have a hard time getting to that point because of condoms, but we prefer to keep the condoms on. So that is why we ended up having to save them for each other. Not because it was a choice of our. Circumstances just made it that way.

[bethncole 49]

I have a similiar "problem". When I jerk off ( by myself ) I have a hard time cumming if I'm thinking about someone else besides my wife. But when I think of her ( with another guy of course ) - I cum almost right away.

[nice_cpl_n_bama 24]

Hello All,

I'm really hard to get off. I often play with 4 or 5 different women during a party. I'm difficult to get off with intercourse and almost impossible with oral. Only 2 women besides my wife have ever managed to get me off orally and they had coaching from Laurie. She can make me pop anytime she wants but it's a long road for anybody else.

I usually end up playing several times with several different ladies before it catches up with me. It makes for a great party

[yourbitterpill 34]

I find that I can have a few orgasms w/o having to cum. Which can sometimes be quite funny because it seems a lot of women don't know that men are also capable of having orgasms w/o cumming.

 

The first few times we play with a new couple, I usually don't cum at all, and that can be caused be several factors - usually its nerves or the different sensation. Mrs. Pill is very tight too so if the other girl is a little more "loose" than her, that can as make it more difficult to cum.

 

No worries though. If the other couple asks, I'll explain and assure them I'm having fun. Like everything else, it comes down to communication.

[n2ez 18]

Have always been that way! can last for hours and can't seem to cumm if my partner has not had a least one "O" (prefer multi!! ) lol

with the Wifey it doesn't go for long for before I cumm, have alwasy been this way, can remember the first Woman I was with, (late starter 21) lol she didn't belive I was a virgin because I could not cumm, just fucked her for hours...

[WHFTG 15]

I have a different issue. I tend to come quickly the first time. I say the first time as I have had nights where I have come 5 times, obviously with a little down time in between. The quick one bothers me sometimes, but I have heard from a number of women that getting banged for 30 minutes is no fun either. So the question is, is it better to come multiple times during the evening even though one of them may be a quick-one or last all night long with one good cum at the end?

[MrsPandMe 150]

I generally don't, but I make it a point if I get to the point of where it might happen to ask if this is something she (the lady I'm with) wants. We're still pretty new to the game, so nerves I think might play a little bit of a part in my ability to hold off, but I think careful attention to your personal cues and being able to understand very well the "steps" to your orgasm can help you stave it off. Of course, I'm just speaking of myself.. Every man is different.

 

And whoever mentioned that "you've figured one penis out, you've figured them all out", that's crap. It's a penis, not a power tool. The basic anatomy is there, but every man's O is as complex as the man they're attached to! Remember, those nerve endings run somewhere!

 

Mr. P