Thinking I want MFM...How do I ask?

[LikeMinds321 1,527]

...Out of the blue while we are enjoying our dinner with our kids, I say I'll give you 2 hours to go out and find a man to bring home. Her eyes lite up and she could barely sit still as we discussed it further. After dinner we came home. She put the lttle one to bed and started preping for her evening.

 

She has been gone 1 hour and things are looking good per a cell phone conversation we had a few minutes ago. She said many guys looked very interested in her.

 

Mr.

How did you and your wife decide to approach this second venture differently from the first?

 

Did you set up some guidelines, discuss safety issues?

 

How did things go last night?

 

LM

[aahours1 16]

You will never know, unless you ask. Your husband had already set the meeting up and you had a great time. Now you want to explore further. He already knows your husband is alright with it. So go ahead and let it fall as it may. You may be surprised.

[jamther 15]

How did you and your wife decide to approach this second venture differently from the first?

 

Did you set up some guidelines, discuss safety issues?

 

How did things go last night?

 

LM

 

Hi guys...It's the Mrs. here.....

 

Regarding last night....boy oh boy.....

 

At dinner hubby could tell that I was feeling really frisky and I had told him so. All day I was just really looking forward to the kids bedtime....So that was when he told me to go out and "find someone". In all honesty, I knew that wasn't going to happen. I was not comfortable bringing a stranger home.....ewwwww. It's just not safe and a bad idea all together. "He" should be someone that we both meet and get to know.

 

So, I just used this for our benefit. I walked into three different bars...by myself, which just about gave me an anxiety attack, as if I owned the places. I felt good, I knew I looked good and I wanted to exude an aura of confidence. This worked...I saw the "boys" eyeing me up and it excited me even more. I eyed them right back and didn't look away until they did. I never stayed long enough to really have to "beat" anyone back and always walked out with a crowd as to never be alone.

 

I was on my way home by 10:30pm, having phone sex with hubby the entire way. I barely got into the garage before our clothes were off. That was proceeded by the most intense love making session I think we ever had. My body did things I never knew it could.

 

So in effect, being desired after all these years of being a homebodied mommy has completely brought our level of sex to an all time high. And we are looking forward to continuing to raise the stakes.

 

As far as my MFM, I have no doubt it will happen, just need a little more time and it needs to be a joint effort. Don't get me wrong, if I had run into my "fling" last night....(the one who blew us off last Friday for the MFM), I would have asked him again to come home. But it's only because I already know him and am comfortable with him. Everyone deserves a second chance.

 

So although I think hubby was initially a little disappointed when I let him know I was heading home alone, his mood was brought UP again with the mind-blowing attention I shared with him.....

 

This is really great.....we are really great and are so excited with this new spark. It's almost so good, I'm nervous for a black cloud. Always a little pessimism to bring things back to the ground.

 

Staying in tonight though......I'm not sure we can sustain this level of sex....it's EXHAUSTINGLY awesome!

[Vjklander 138]

Well, if you get called to Washington to testify before Congress, give us a call.

[ShellyM 0]

Hi guys...It's the Mrs. here.....

 

Regarding last night....boy oh boy.....

 

At dinner hubby could tell that I was feeling really frisky and I had told him so. All day I was just really looking forward to the kids bedtime....So that was when he told me to go out and "find someone". In all honesty, I knew that wasn't going to happen. I was not comfortable bringing a stranger home.....ewwwww. It's just not safe and a bad idea all together. "He" should be someone that we both meet and get to know.

 

So, I just used this for our benefit. I walked into three different bars...by myself, which just about gave me an anxiety attack, as if I owned the places. I felt good, I knew I looked good and I wanted to exude an aura of confidence. This worked...I saw the "boys" eyeing me up and it excited me even more. I eyed them right back and didn't look away until they did. I never stayed long enough to really have to "beat" anyone back and always walked out with a crowd as to never be alone.

 

I was on my way home by 10:30pm, having phone sex with hubby the entire way. I barely got into the garage before our clothes were off. That was proceeded by the most intense love making session I think we ever had. My body did things I never knew it could.

 

So in effect, being desired after all these years of being a homebodied mommy has completely brought our level of sex to an all time high. And we are looking forward to continuing to raise the stakes.

 

As far as my MFM, I have no doubt it will happen, just need a little more time and it needs to be a joint effort. Don't get me wrong, if I had run into my "fling" last night....(the one who blew us off last Friday for the MFM), I would have asked him again to come home. But it's only because I already know him and am comfortable with him. Everyone deserves a second chance.

 

So although I think hubby was initially a little disappointed when I let him know I was heading home alone, his mood was brought UP again with the mind-blowing attention I shared with him.....

 

This is really great.....we are really great and are so excited with this new spark. It's almost so good, I'm nervous for a black cloud. Always a little pessimism to bring things back to the ground.

 

Staying in tonight though......I'm not sure we can sustain this level of sex....it's EXHAUSTINGLY awesome!

 

Awesome!!!!

[sweet_tna 680]

Hi guys...It's the Mrs. here.....

 

Regarding last night....boy oh boy.....

 

At dinner hubby could tell that I was feeling really frisky and I had told him so. All day I was just really looking forward to the kids bedtime....So that was when he told me to go out and "find someone". In all honesty, I knew that wasn't going to happen. I was not comfortable bringing a stranger home.....ewwwww. It's just not safe and a bad idea all together. "He" should be someone that we both meet and get to know.

 

So, I just used this for our benefit. I walked into three different bars...by myself, which just about gave me an anxiety attack, as if I owned the places. I felt good, I knew I looked good and I wanted to exude an aura of confidence. This worked...I saw the "boys" eyeing me up and it excited me even more. I eyed them right back and didn't look away until they did. I never stayed long enough to really have to "beat" anyone back and always walked out with a crowd as to never be alone.

 

I was on my way home by 10:30pm, having phone sex with hubby the entire way. I barely got into the garage before our clothes were off. That was proceeded by the most intense love making session I think we ever had. My body did things I never knew it could.

 

So in effect, being desired after all these years of being a homebodied mommy has completely brought our level of sex to an all time high. And we are looking forward to continuing to raise the stakes.

 

As far as my MFM, I have no doubt it will happen, just need a little more time and it needs to be a joint effort. Don't get me wrong, if I had run into my "fling" last night....(the one who blew us off last Friday for the MFM), I would have asked him again to come home. But it's only because I already know him and am comfortable with him. Everyone deserves a second chance.

 

So although I think hubby was initially a little disappointed when I let him know I was heading home alone, his mood was brought UP again with the mind-blowing attention I shared with him.....

 

This is really great.....we are really great and are so excited with this new spark. It's almost so good, I'm nervous for a black cloud. Always a little pessimism to bring things back to the ground.

 

Staying in tonight though......I'm not sure we can sustain this level of sex....it's EXHAUSTINGLY awesome!

 

You GO girl!

 

=)

[jamther 15]

It certainly was awesome and it's all I find myself thinking about! I even forgot to put the laundry soap in the washer and ran the cycle with the water only. I couldn't understand why the baby's bibs were still all crusty!!!

 

Looking really forward to the next time. Hubby and I are like teenagers again. Trying to steal minutes and hide to make out with reckless abandom!!! Only this time it's our kids we are hiding from...not our parents!

 

It's really nice to feel good.

[purpletiger 25]

It certainly was awesome and it's all I find myself thinking about! I even forgot to put the laundry soap in the washer and ran the cycle with the water only. I couldn't understand why the baby's bibs were still all crusty!!!

 

Looking really forward to the next time. Hubby and I are like teenagers again. Trying to steal minutes and hide to make out with reckless abandom!!! Only this time it's our kids we are hiding from...not our parents!

 

It's really nice to feel good.

 

Now that's exactly how it should be.

 

The reason we like swinging is because it lights the spark in our sex life:facelick:

 

Good Luck and have fun!!

[safireblues 106]

This thread is really great, I saw lots of my own fears and insecurities after my own recent experiences here, and how I beat myself up instead of moving on. The hard thing is there is no manual for how to do this, just like with anything else with dating or whatever, you are flying blind. I'm thankful there are people here that will listen and give honest opinions. It's a great resource.

[jamther 15]

Hi All....

 

I know this thread has been played out for a long time but we have an update. Hubby and I went out last night as "strangers"......He wanted to see me in action with other men (flirting, dancing) and I of course wanted to see "HIM". "HIM" being the man that I was given permission to see and fuck on a Saturday morning and the "HIM" who turned us down for a MFM at my horror and disappointment.

 

Well, I called "HIM" at around 9:00 pm to tell him I was out and wanted to see him. He was feeling under the weather for a but agreed to meet me anyway at the local club. He called me to tell me he was on his way and I instructed him that after his initial appearance and said his hello's (we live in a small town), I would meet him at his car so I could blow him. He was obviously game. And this suggestion was from Hubby. He wanted to get this guy all horned up so we could approach him again. The only stipulation was that I not let "HIM" finish....no cum. We wanted to save that for later.

 

"He" walked in just as planned and it was instant wet panties.....within 15 minutes we were back at his car. Blow job under way I took it very slow and teasing....all the while gearing up to tell him hubby was just inside the bar waiting for us. Needless to say, he was quite taken aback and I let him know that I completely understoood.....He was basically blind-sided and that wasn't nice. And he was literally fearful of a "Passion's Crime"...his words.

 

To make a long story short at this point, my husband very nicely approached him after we made our way separately back inside and asked him to go outside to discuss this. Our "man" very nicely obliged. As they walked by me, my husband murmured me to "Stay put!"....that was a turn on in itself.....the whole control thing really gets me going.

 

After 15 life-long minutes, they both came back in smiling and laughing. Hubby walked over to me and whispered "Meet your new "Fuck-buddy".....OMG,OMG,OMG.....I was speechless.

 

So we spent the next 1 1/2 hours talking, laughing and drinking. We talked about how this is sparking our marriage and he said he was more then happy to play our "Dr. Phil".....it was really great. Although we never ended up together as he was really under the weather, he told us he would call today at 2 pm to plan to come over tonight. All day I was on the verge of puking....so worried about the rejection of no phone call. But as he promised, my cell phone rang at 2 pm exactly. He was still pretty sick and said he would call later to set this up if he started to feel better after taking some meds. And that is where it stands. It's 5:45 and I'm just waiting to hear something.

 

This is truly surreal.....and last night is a complete blur. Standing in between my husband and fantasy fuck was WAY more then I could handle. It snowed here last night but at no point was I cold.....I was sweating bullets all night. My palms were slippery...and I couldn't get to sleep at all. It could have been that hubby and I went at it for two hours upon our return home or it could have been that I could have kept going for two more. Either way.....the baby had me up at his usual 6:30 am.....so it was a very early reality check.......

 

So we're just waiting......MFM here we come. I will make you all proud.

[jamther 15]

Oh yeah.....I forgot to mention.....Hubby was very impressed with my choice of a "friend". Well-spoken, handsome, smart, clean and very open and understanding. Did he really expect any different??? I picked him to marry after all...my taste has standards!!!

 

And it's now 6:30 and I'm still waiting......even if it doesn't happen tonight, at least we get a good nights sleep after a great lay with each other. And the knowledge that this will almost definately happen.

 

Updates to follow...............

[JDApopka 54]

any more updates on this.

[ShellyM 0]

Go on girl, with your BAD self!!

[jamther 15]

And to think I didn't post anymore thinking this was old news!!! How exciting to have a following.....!

 

So....where were we???......Well, we never ended up hearing from our "man" on that fateful Saturday night. Which in all honesty was fine with us. We were so tired from the night before that we were in bed and asleep by nine. And the fact that he called at 2 o'clock as promised was all I needed.

 

So fast forward to Wednesday night (Thanksgiving Eve). We plan to go out as ourselves....husband and wife. I was really needing to just be the trophy wife for the night. I was not in the "gaming" mood. Anyhow, we ended up with 4 other couples planning to meet us also. All friends of ours so it was great. We danced, drank, and had an awesome time. Hubby was very turned on by my dancing and the fact that I had many "admirers" sharing my dance space......hmmm....it was great. I LOVED flirting around with these "boys" and then looking over my shoulder to see Hubby completely in awe. I was his and he was loving this.....it was a HUGE turn-on!

 

So....in between songs, hubby whispered "Go to the car and call "him"". I was totally against this due to the fact that we were with other people and I was not expecting to play....but that didn't last long. Once I get the "itch" implanted in my head, it doesn't take long for me to have to "scratch" it.

 

So, inconspicuously, I headed to our car to make the call. Unfortunately I got his voicemail twice. Oh-well.....for all I knew he could have been out of town for the holiday. No skin off our backs, we were still having a blast. But admittedly so, I was watching the door everytime it opened. A girl has to have a goal.......

 

So we enjoyed the rest of the night. I was eating up the attention......

 

Interrupt for a little relevant background on me, we have had three children in six years. That also includes two miscarriages. So with basic math, I have been pregnant and/or breastfeeding FOREVER in seems. To top it off, all this baby making had left me 35 lbs heavier then I had ever been. Over the last few months, I have shed that 35 lbs plus some and am back into my pre-marriage body. I know this sounds strange to mention but I wanted you all to understand the big deal this attention is. I was always able to "catch an eye". But obviously, my "Mommy" status put that on the back burner. To now have it back again is fabulous! It has done wonders for my confidence. And for my sex-drive.

 

Ok.....my soap box is done......anyway, hubby and I leave that bar and head to another for a night cap (I was DD by the way, I had like 1/2 a beer all night) and can anyone guess what happens??!?!? Yup......HE'S there. We spotted his car in the parking lot and OMG....I was instantly 4000 degrees. Do we go in? Should just I go in? Should I call him again? Should we just leave????? We decide I will go in alone and I will call Hubby when I feel it out. So I walk in and see him. He's chatting and doesn't notice me. I sit across the bar, watching him and waiting for him to catch me watching him. He does and I think he smiled but I really couldn't see. He was under a really bright ceiling light.

 

But......he was with someone. A very pretty lady in which I recognized as the girl he had described to me as his on again/off again girlfriend. As soon as I realized this, I knew that I had to back off. The "game" couldn't continue in this circumstance. And I have to admit, I felt really awkward. And I assume he did also. We said hello, he introduced me to his friends and we had some small talk. I called Hubby, let him know that it wasn't a good time to "play" and he came in to meet me. He had a beer while we sat across the bar from our guy.

 

I haven't contacted him since. I'm not even sure what I would say. It may not even have been awkward for him. I have a HUGE tendency of over thinking things. Any advice? I'm confident this chapter will provoke some postings and I look forward to it. And I know that this whole "girlfriend" development will raise the red flags.......I'm prepared. But be easy, I cry easy.

[jamther 15]

Shelly!!!....Thanks for the encouragement!!! You are such a blast!