nicerrtxcple 13 Posted December 17, 2007 ok we are a large couple,who are over weight but we are working on it. but it is hard to even thing about trying this when you don't have the perfect body like most have on the sites.I mean i don't know what to do or to try? Quote Share this post Link to post
ncmd_couple 597 Posted December 17, 2007 TxCple, Everyone has their issues. And weight can be a big one for some people, from both sides of the equation. But there are a lot of men and women who find a big beautiful woman very attractive. I would rather be with a BBW with a great personality than a model type who has the personality of a fence post. I fully understand this as I was a 335 and have worked down to 215, which is pretty good for a guy approaching 50 and 6 feet tall. My sexy better half is a BBW. And we have had a lot of fun swinging. So don't sweat it. Your love for each other and a touch of confidence that you are who you are and make the best of it will go a long way! S 1 Quote Share this post Link to post
ShellyM 0 Posted December 17, 2007 First off NCMD, congrats to you! Go on with yourself! I know first hand just how difficult it can be. RR, just relax. Its often said: There truly is someone for everyone in this lifestyle. "Thin" in itself is relative. I have friends who yell at me and tell me to stop losing weight because I'm getting too thin; then I have another friend who only plays with ladies who are size 4-6 because he likes very petite ladies. Jay is an ass man and LOVES women who have lots of junk in their trunk! He loves a big booty more than Sir Mix a Lot lol. To him its all about her confidence. On Sat. we played with a couple and the wife is BBW. But man does she WORK IT. That woman struts her stuff; and out of all of the ladies there (and there were a few that were HWP) she is the one he liked alot. She was hot. So you are absolutely welcome in the lifestyle. Don't take anything personally. Just because one couple may not be attracted I guarantee you there are 5 that WILL be attracted. Just be confident and you will do fantastic!!! Quote Share this post Link to post
incognito 15 Posted December 18, 2007 One of the best partners I (the male) have had was a BBW. As Shelly put it, this girl knew how to work it and knew how to please a man. She rocked. Now when I see a BBW, I often think to myself...mmm, I'll bet she's a wildcat... Sure, some people will pass because of your size, but there are plenty who will see you for what you can bring to the experience. Quote Share this post Link to post
sexcupid 809 Posted December 18, 2007 You may not have as many problems as you think...we've seen all sizes at the few clubs we've gone to. And I'm certainly not as small as I used to be, but it's a work in progress (definitely most would consider me a BBW...I just think I have my moments of hotness ). On a side note, I clicked on your profile link. You may want to fill it in a little more completely, spell check, and most importantly: post a picture. We would not pass on your profile because of your size, but would for lack of a picture and lack of information. Good luck and have fun! Maria Quote Share this post Link to post
ShellyM 0 Posted December 18, 2007 You may not have as many problems as you think...we've seen all sizes at the few clubs we've gone to. And I'm certainly not as small as I used to be, but it's a work in progress (definitely most would consider me a BBW...I just think I have my moments of hotness ). Girl, please! I just perved your profile (again, ahem lol) and omg...I had to double take your hubby. I swear he looks JUST like a doctor here in san marcos lol. Its true though. If you love yourself others will get that vibe and you'll do great; and hey, if someone is snotty to you than you simply move on! Shelly Quote Share this post Link to post
sexcupid 809 Posted December 18, 2007 Girl, please! I just perved your profile (again, ahem lol) and omg...I had to double take your hubby. I swear he looks JUST like a doctor here in san marcos lol. Its true though. If you love yourself others will get that vibe and you'll do great; and hey, if someone is snotty to you than you simply move on! Shelly I have perved yours a few times as well...lol...hot pics all around...and Jay with the goatee...*swoons* Have to agree with the last statement....OP confidence is contagious. Maria Quote Share this post Link to post
nicerrtxcple 13 Posted December 18, 2007 thanks everyone for the nice words.and i just wanted to let everyone i have updated my profile with pics. Quote Share this post Link to post
MRnMSbhaven 45 Posted December 18, 2007 it is hard to even thing about trying this when you don't have the perfect body like most have on the sites. Perfect body Where'd you find one of those? Where can I get one? Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and no one is more critical of it than the one whose body it happens to be. Ms B Quote Share this post Link to post
ShellyM 0 Posted December 18, 2007 Perfect body Where'd you find one of those? Where can I get one? Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and no one is more critical of it than the one whose body it happens to be. Ms B No joke, there IS no perfect body. You do the best with what you've got and love that person in the mirror. Quote Share this post Link to post
safireblues 106 Posted December 19, 2007 I messed around with a larger woman in the last year (and I'm not skinny myself, size 10-14 based on cut), but she was significantly larger than anyone I'd been with before, and she was so hot and sexy in her own skin. Which is what's most important to me, ultimately. Quote Share this post Link to post
sweet_tna 680 Posted December 19, 2007 Nicerrtxcpl, I can assure you that there is someone for everyone! My honey and I aren't exactly supermodel material either. He's a "chubby hubby", and I'm a size 12 with plenty of junk in my trunk. But for us, a great personality goes a long way. So come on in, the water's fine! =) Quote Share this post Link to post
ShellyM 0 Posted December 19, 2007 So come on in, the water's fine! =) Mmmmm, save us a spot! Quote Share this post Link to post
sweet_tna 680 Posted December 19, 2007 Mmmmm, save us a spot! Anytime . . . =) Quote Share this post Link to post
des1re06 200 Posted December 19, 2007 We definately prefer women with curves. No offense intended to the skinny ladies, as you are beautiful too. So have fun and don't worry. You'll be the hit of the party as long as you're smiling and personable. I was an 18-20 just 3 years ago, and had to lose weight for health reasons, but I always felt sexy (thanks to hubby's encouragement). Enjoy! Mrs. D Quote Share this post Link to post
iapr 24 Posted December 23, 2007 but it is hard to even thing about trying this when you don't have the perfect body like most have on the sites. What sites are you refering to???? Commercial Porn sites? They don't count as they are not swingers. Swingers are real people and real people have bumps, bulges, love handles, beer guts, moles zits and blemishes, bald spots, receding hairlines, stretch marks and so on and so on and so on. The best thing to do to put your mind at ease is to go to a lifestyle club and just look around. You will see all types of bodies and all types of people. Yes there will be some hard body model material folks and there will be some that barely fit through the door and there will be a whole bunch that fall somewhere in between those two extremes. Now I am not going to insult your inteligence by blowing sunshine up your butt and tell you that appearances are not important or that people will only judge you by your personality. Appearance and presentation IS very important but cleanliness, meticulus grooming and nice appropriate dress will go a long long ways and that is something that is within everyone's reach. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post
funfun31 25 Posted December 24, 2007 Hey. I fully understand your soncerns. One thing you'll find is that there are a whole range of ages, shapes, and sizes in the lifestyle (just go to any lifestyle club for proof). When we got into the lifestyle in January of this year, I was a bit overweight (225 lbs, 38 inch waist...now about 195lbs with a 34 inch waist...the lifestyle gave me extra reasons to work on getting in shape, since I always want to make sure the lady I am playing with is having at least as good a time as my wife, since many of our partners have been younger than us) and my wife (who is 5'1") was close to 250 lbs (that since has come down to about 225). When we got into this, my wife had a lot of concerns "Who would want ME?" Once we started meeting people, we found that we NEVER had problems finding lots of sexy, sexy people to play with. Sexy is all about attitude and how you handle yourself. It does not have a weight, size, or age limit. It's all about little things like confidence, personality, grooming, the ability to engage others, and a good sense of humor. Sometimes, it's just the expression on your face or the way you carry yourself. Using that criteria, I can confidently say that when the wife and I go to our favorite club, we feel like two of the sexiest people in there... and it must show, because we are never wanting for attention. Keep the right attitude, be honest about who you are and what you want out of this, and everything else will take care of itself. Lots of luck and happy hunting! 1 Quote Share this post Link to post
JasonHauck30 13 Posted December 24, 2007 As long as a couple is open-minded...their body-type is unimportant. Sophie & I are into people who like to roleplay & we look for mentally adventurous friends than "chiseled" ones. Quote Share this post Link to post
JustAskJulie 2,595 Posted December 26, 2007 Most swinging couples DO NOT have perfect bodies. I've yet to visit a club or spend an hour looking through ads without seeing that it's pretty evenly split. The important thing is going to be self-esteem. If you go into it with the attitude that no one will like you because you are overweight, that will come through in your attitude whether it's online in your ad or in person at a club and you'll likely end up alone. You obviously (or at least hopefully) find each other attractive so remember that. If you find each other attractive then other people have reason to find you attractive too. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post
Texasfuncouple 69 Posted December 27, 2007 Nicertxcple, You have several great things going for you! The lifestyle is made up big and small, red, yellow, black, and blue. At this moment you are someone's fantasy, and you don't know it yet. Once you get out there and start enjoying yourself and you realize people find you attractive it really builds your confidence. Since entering the lifestyle my wife has gone from relatively shy to bold and sexy, and all it took was her hearing how sexy she was from someone other than me. On the flip side, nothing has given both of us more inspiration to get in shape than being in the lifestyle. It is a win/win situation!!! Take care and enjoy! Texasfun 1 Quote Share this post Link to post
BradAndJanet 70 Posted December 29, 2007 Nicertxcple, You have several great things going for you! The lifestyle is made up big and small, red, yellow, black, and blue. At this moment you are someone's fantasy, and you don't know it yet. Once you get out there and start enjoying yourself and you realize people find you attractive it really builds your confidence. Since entering the lifestyle my wife has gone from relatively shy to bold and sexy, and all it took was her hearing how sexy she was from someone other than me. On the flip side, nothing has given both of us more inspiration to get in shape than being in the lifestyle. It is a win/win situation!!! Take care and enjoy! Texasfun Don't forget purple... Good post. -B Quote Share this post Link to post
Texasfuncouple 69 Posted December 31, 2007 Thanks B, This post actually inspired me to write a post on our blog about it. If anyone's interested its here: http://www.gentlenibbles.com/2007/12/26/large-and-in-charge-a-heavier-look-at-swinging/ ~Texasfun Quote Share this post Link to post
nicerrtxcple 13 Posted January 10, 2008 just wanted to say thanks to everyone who we have talked too,and it has made it alot easier for us to get into the swing of things.we have meet a lot of cool people off of here and have learned a bunch from everyone on here.we will be lifers of this board from now on. Quote Share this post Link to post