Pet Peeves in Swinger Personal Ads

[The Fuse 1,012]

So true.

 

We recently took down pics and made our faces private. It wasn't because of his job, but our jobs. We weren't as cautious at first, but I've recently felt the need.

 

xoxo, N (N is she and S is he)

 

So now that your faces are private (so are ours), do you still have public pictures up that show prospective playmates what body types they are dealing with, for both of you?

 

I forgot to mention another thing about the profile from two posts ago (with no pictures of him, but her pictures pretty much identified her in a vanilla way). The profile's handle was composed of their two first names.

 

And they are not posting an anonymous picture of him because of his job?

 

Give me a break!

[PB&J 1,086]

How about this, on the subject of peeves, not pics- couple on a Canadian site we're on- saying they've just moved in June and want hep[sic] breaking in their hot tub- fair enough, except they've had the identical ad for a full year since LAST June, and they "updated" their ad the other day and didn't even bother to correct the spelling error.

[Babysteps 63]

Ok, here's my pet peeve. Now I know why we're all here, and what our motivations are, and that the "end result" we're all in search of IS of an adult nature.......BUT......is it really necessary to spell out IN SUCH A GRAPHIC MANNER, the types of activities sought, descriptions of body parts, etc. Maybe I'm wrong, and it's a GOOD thing to be so specific, but to me, it sometimes comes off in bad taste.

[bellsandwhistle 15]

So now that your faces are private (so are ours), do you still have public pictures up that show prospective playmates what body types they are dealing with, for both of you?

 

I forgot to mention another thing about the profile from two posts ago (with no pictures of him, but her pictures pretty much identified her in a vanilla way). The profile's handle was composed of their two first names.

 

And they are not posting an anonymous picture of him because of his job?

 

Give me a break!

 

I took some pics of myself to display and he's got to get on that. If a couple would like to see more pics, we'll gladly attach some to an email.

 

As for pet peeves, I'm sure it's been mentioned a lot, but pure genital shots are a major turnoff.

[NCfuncouple98 367]

I took some pics of myself to display and he's got to get on that. If a couple would like to see more pics, we'll gladly attach some to an email.

 

 

FYI - A lot of folks will not exchange pics through email - we are one of those couples. We'll open private pics on the sites, but we do not even send face pics through regular email, and I know many feel the same way.

 

We figure we pay to be a member of 3 sites, and we have plenty of pics to share, public or private. Too much implication to send them through email, even regular face pictures - read about the family where their pictures were found on an ad in Czech? Taken off of facebook!

 

We had some emails with a couple the other night who have NO pics on Swing Lifestyle except one in her bikini top. They wanted to meet up with as at the club and asked "how will we know who you are?" My response: I would happily open our private pictures, however, since you have no pictures to open in return, our names are "XXXX", I guess you'll have to track us down.

[bellsandwhistle 15]

FYI - A lot of folks will not exchange pics through email - we are one of those couples. We'll open private pics on the sites, but we do not even send face pics through regular email, and I know many feel the same way.

 

We figure we pay to be a member of 3 sites, and we have plenty of pics to share, public or private. Too much implication to send them through email, even regular face pictures - read about the family where their pictures were found on an ad in Czech? Taken off of facebook!

 

We had some emails with a couple the other night who have NO pics on Swing Lifestyle except one in her bikini top. They wanted to meet up with as at the club and asked "how will we know who you are?" My response: I would happily open our private pictures, however, since you have no pictures to open in return, our names are "XXXX", I guess you'll have to track us down.

 

Perhaps "gladly" was the wrong word choice.

 

We don't mind attaching our face/full profile pics (the un-nekkid ones) to emails, if we're both comfortable.

 

We're cautious, but feel that you have to give a little to get a little....or maybe a lot. Being more of an exhibitionist, I enjoy having some sexy shots on AFF and other sites.

 

We never meet anyone alone and I'm sure we have public pics floating around from various vanilla social activities. It's not as though we lend our address out or our place of employment.

 

ETA - No pics through our joint email, but through AFF we will attach more. Just wanted to clarify that fact.

[Guest CnD4evr]

our pet peeve is only having pics of the lady half of a couple. It bugs us when they are listed as a couple and only one is shown. Either the guy is dog ugly or something seriously wrong with the profile. I am sure this has been noted before but we just had to mention it.

[The Fuse 1,012]

our pet peeve is only having pics of the lady half of a couple. It bugs us when they are listed as a couple and only one is shown. Either the guy is dog ugly or something seriously wrong with the profile. I am sure this has been noted before but we just had to mention it.

Yes, this has been mentioned before, and by me more than my fair share . It is a big pet peeve of mine.

 

I just have to say, I have been surprised how many times the "hidden" male half is attractive. Mostly we find out by meeting the couple at a party or meet and greet, then looking at their profile later and seeing only pictures of the lady. So, there is hope for some of those couples.

[ALilOEverything 901]

It's a pet peeve when couples make completely new profiles to make the necessary changes to make themselves appear more favorable. I believe they do this because of all the people who have blocked them... it gives them a fresh start but it feels like they are hiding something to me. This is one example why I have a problem with this:

 

Last week we were contacted by a couple who had a huge age difference (17 years) where the female half wasn't even drinking age. Well I see they just made a new profile and is now she has suddenly aged 3 years and is old enough to drink (obviously the same couple). It's already a pet peeve when people lie about their age but this is even worse. People need to be making an informed decision when it comes to drinking with minors and it doesn't let unsuspecting people to chose not to.

 

I'm sure there are valid reasons for making a whole new profile, but chances are we'll shy away.

[TheLorax 173]

LOL! You noticed that too? I wonder how many people don't realize that Swing Lifestyle doesn't update your ages automatically. You've been a member for 6 years, and you're still 22 - that's a good trick...

 

All of our info is current. I don't like to be misled, so I try to stay up to date on our profile so I'm not misleading anyone else. Heck, I was proud of getting back down to 175lbs, and couldn't wait to change that stat!

 

Ah, so what does the group think about posting the age and weight you look? For example, I look ten years younger than I am. I also look about thirty pounds lighter than I am because I'm dense (and not just in the head!).

Jen looks like she's twenty pounds lighter than she is (strong girl

 

I have mixed feelings about not being completely up front about those stats. On the one hand if someone posts that they are 40 and they look 60, I feel deceived. If they post that they are 40, look 35 and are actually 45, I don't really care that much. On the other hand, we're just looking for friends and playmates, not life partners, so I accept that there will be a lot of things that I don't know about the other people, and things I don't plan on telling them either. On the third hand, if you never tell, and look and act your age and weight, what's the difference?

 

I'll also echo the previous multiple sentiments about poor spelling and grammar. A major turn-off. An occasional mistake sure, but not so many that it's distracting. I see too much text-speak and I don't even try to decipher it.

[The Fuse 1,012]

Ah, so what does the group think about posting the age and weight you look? For example, I look ten years younger than I am. I also look about thirty pounds lighter than I am because I'm dense (and not just in the head!).

Jen looks like she's twenty pounds lighter than she is (strong girl

 

I have mixed feelings about not being completely up front about those stats. On the one hand if someone posts that they are 40 and they look 60, I feel deceived. If they post that they are 40, look 35 and are actually 45, I don't really care that much. On the other hand, we're just looking for friends and playmates, not life partners, so I accept that there will be a lot of things that I don't know about the other people, and things I don't plan on telling them either. On the third hand, if you never tell, and look and act your age and weight, what's the difference?

The problem is that many, many people are under the impression that they look younger and like they weigh less than they actually are and do.

 

Most of those people are mistaken. I know several of them. They are really convinced that they still look like their decade-old pictures, and that they look slimmer than the scale indicates.

 

Once in a while you get someone who looks younger than they are. But the ones who say so the loudest, are usually full of it. I don't want to set aside a night to meet them, when I could have been doing something else.

 

Especially in the case where Mr. Fuse and I have made plans with someone we think we'll be attracted to, and they walk in and are clearly older, heavier, and shorter than they said. I am annoyed because they got me there under false pretenses.

 

To claim you look thirty pounds lighter than you are, and that a woman looks twenty pounds lighter, is pretty tough to believe in most cases. Maybe in your case it is true. The odds are against you.

 

I would really rather see someone's real age and weight on their profile, to know they are not telling a big lie. If you really look younger and thinner, your pictures will clear that up! Believe me, people look at your pictures before they look at your stats. Make sure your profile says clearly when your pictures were taken, especially if you think there is a big difference in how you look and how you "should" look based on your age and weight. Better yet, meet people at meet and greets and let them be surprised if they find out your real stats later.

 

Sorry for my sour tone, but I've really heard the same line so many times. It usually comes out the mouth of someone who is clearly not seeing the same thing the rest of us are.

[Rackir 159]

Ah, so what does the group think about posting the age and weight you look? For example, I look ten years younger than I am. I also look about thirty pounds lighter than I am because I'm dense (and not just in the head!).

Jen looks like she's twenty pounds lighter than she is (strong girl

I have mixed feelings about not being completely up front about those stats. On the one hand if someone posts that they are 40 and they look 60, I feel deceived. If they post that they are 40, look 35 and are actually 45, I don't really care that much. On the other hand, we're just looking for friends and playmates, not life partners, so I accept that there will be a lot of things that I don't know about the other people, and things I don't plan on telling them either. On the third hand, if you never tell, and look and act your age and weight, what's the difference?

I'll also echo the previous multiple sentiments about poor spelling and grammar. A major turn-off. An occasional mistake sure, but not so many that it's distracting. I see too much text-speak and I don't even try to decipher it.

 

Gotta agree with Fuse here. Tell the truth in your stats and let your pics show the evidence. We all wear our weight and age in different ways, but we all wear them nonetheless. Be real in your stats, it may slightly reduce the number of contacts you make, but it will make those contacts you do make that much more pleasant (imagine how happy they'll be when they see that you are much slimmer and younger looking than they expected!).

[The Fuse 1,012]

Ah, so what does the group think about posting the age and weight you look?

How about when someone looks older than they are? How many of us see ourselves that way? There are some people who do... but would they own it?

 

Are they supposed to post their age as 55 when they are only 48? I doubt anyone would actually do that, even if they thought they looked older. The truth is on their side; why would they handicap themselves? Nope, nope...

[TheLorax 173]

The problem is that many, many people are under the impression that they look younger and like they weigh less than they actually are and do.

 

Most of those people are mistaken. I know several of them. They are really convinced that they still look like their decade-old pictures, and that they look slimmer than the scale indicates.

 

Very true. I don't look anything like my ten year old picture, but whenever I've told people how old I am I get disbelief. Whenever I've asked those people to guess my age it invariably comes in 6-7 years low and the response is usually somewhere along the lines of "well, you act much older than that, so I guessed high." Jen and Liz usually have fun asking people that question. Same with how much I weigh (usually the surprise there comes from a hug or a wrestling match (the fun kind).

 

The reason I asked is not that I really have any investment in my actual age or weight, I'm very comfortable with who I am. At a young age I took on adult responsibility and grew up early, but my genetics are such that most people in my family live a long time and age well. I ask because I am surprised at how *old* some people look who are my age. I take care of myself, I exercise, don't smoke or drink, and wear sunscreen religiously. I've watched my close friends over the years and some of them age rapidly, and some of them never seem to age. The last person I played with outside of my partners was 15 years my senior and looked my age. Both of my partners are younger than I am, 12 years in Jen's case, but people assume all the time we're similar age.

 

So, sure, when stats posted don't match the image it's a problem. But I've actually had the reverse problem of being accused of being too young for some people, people who were looking for people "their age" when I was in fact the same age as they were. Hence my question.

 

Really though, I'm not into collecting, so the people I/we play with will be friends anyway, I was just curious to see what people here thought.

[good times 991]

Ah, so what does the group think about posting the age and weight you look?

I can't really ad much to what Fuse said above except to say that I personally find my interest in someone peeks quickly when their pictures indicate they look real good for the age or weight they posted. On the other hand, it is an immediate turn-off if they look ten years older or 20 pounds heavier than they claim to be.

 

As far as people guessing you are younger than you look goes, reducing the age you think someone is by 6-10 years when you guess their age is basic "age guessing 101", isn't it? So if people are guessing my age or weight low by 6-10 years or 10-20 pounds, it is no surprise to me, and would tend to indicate to me that I look pretty much like what I am. It has been my experience that while a lot of folks think they look younger or look like they weigh less than they do, very few actually do, especially once they lose their clothes.

[NCfuncouple98 367]

We had some issues a while back with someone NOT posting their real age & weight and actually questioned it. She claimed to be my height (5'1", and 140 pounds (25 pounds lighter than me)). Ummm, the pictures did not show anything close, so I actually asked if the pictures were current. I got "no, I've lost weight since then". Ok, well if I lost a lot of weight I would be quick to post new pictures. In conversation, not just for that fact, it just wasn't a match.

 

Saw her at our local club. The pictures didn't lie, the weight in the profile did. Yes we carry weight differently but trust me on this one, it wasn't possible.

 

My point? We honestly stopped looking at weight on profiles not long after this, and a post I had about it on here. We go for the pictures, period. Age and weight aren't the deal breaker. It starts with the pictures.

 

So be honest in the profile, and post your sexiest, best-face pictures. Those are what count anyway.

 

Mrs NC

[Chicup 41]

It has been my experience that while a lot of folks think they look younger or look like they weigh less than they do, very few actually do, especially once they lose their clothes.

 

exactly.

 

I've been told just how young I look to the point it actually hurts me in what I do. Guys barely older than I am think I'm just a new kid on the block its almost amusing.

 

I also know that I hide being fat better than a lot of people. I tend to evenly distribute it, so my gut doesn't get all that big. In clothes most of it is hidden, though people do notice when I've lost.

 

Take off the clothes though and I still have grey in my chest hair and when I had the weight it showed. Hell it was seeing a video of myself in only shorts a few months back that made me decide it was time to loose the weight.

 

Really though no one should lie about their age or weight, its just idiotic, they will be caught, and end up looking like a complete tool.

 

We have only recently been relooking at couples on SLS. Its been 4 years, long enough that our ages make me chuckle a bit as our profile is currently blank except for out old height/weight/ages. Of course we had to look up people we met to see if they were still around. An astounding number were still using the same photos, which were not new when we met them the first time.

 

Really I wish I knew what people were thinking in this regard.

[TheLorax 173]

I'll agree that the written stats are mostly useless, but a fair number of people look at the stats over the pictures, and a fair number of people look at the pictures over the stats. I've discussed lying on stats and people seemed to be pretty much against that.

 

What about lying with pictures? And I'm not talking about old pics or photoshopped pics. What about someone who knows that a particular camera angle pretty much hides that which may be unattractive about them? Or they dress in such a fashion that it conceals them in such a way that someone seeing them naked would most likely be turned off. What about makeup?

 

Obviously we all want to present ourselves in the best way possible, the way that puts us in the best light. The strongest arguments in opposition to fudging your age and weight stats was that it was misrepresentation, but is a current picture that is taken in such a manner to present the subject in the maximum positive light different? How?

 

That last question is one I think about as I do a lot of photography. I can make an unattractive subject very attractive, and I can make the most subjectively attractive model unattractive, it's part of my skill. In the end, does it really make that much difference in how your ad physically portrays you? To the folks who say yes, how do you respond to the fact that we each interpret what we see based on our experiences. I may present a picture of myself and stats that indicate I'm a stunningly attractive, well shaped person. If, when you meet me, and your perception of me is very close to how I portrayed myself in an ad, or better, even if it's not scientifically accurate, what's the problem?

 

(and, just because there are those who will think this is all about my egotism, it's not. I'm not stunningly attractive and I'm not as shallow as all that, these are just questions this discussion stimulated for me)

[The Fuse 1,012]

What about lying with pictures? And I'm not talking about old pics or photoshopped pics. What about someone who knows that a particular camera angle pretty much hides that which may be unattractive about them?

 

My opinion is that if your pictures are recent and not photoshopped, then they are not lying. BUT, "not lying" is not the standard we are shooting for here. We are shooting for showing ourselves the way our bodies look if we met in person and spent some time together, hopefully in an enticing way. There is nothing wrong with wanting to show your best attributes and minimize the worst ones. My main picture has me turned to the side, which is a flattering angle for most ladies. But other pictures show me and Mr. Fuse from different angles, and full-body shots that don't hide major body parts.

 

An example of how "not lying" can still not help a couple: if I look at a profile and see six pictures of breasts that are very voluptuous and nothing else, I am assuming the woman is fat. She's not lying, but she's not doing herself any favors. If I see only a picture of the guy from the chest up, again I am assuming he is fat. If he is wearing a baseball cap in every picture, I am assuming he is bald.

 

On the other hand, it's not like I'm going to post a picture that draws the eye where I don't want it to go. Our Swing Lifestyle pictures show our whole bodies, but if there is one that is more flattering, I'll post it over one that is less flattering. This is all common sense stuff and no lying about it.

 

Or they dress in such a fashion that it conceals them in such a way that someone seeing them naked would most likely be turned off. What about makeup?

 

Obviously we all want to present ourselves in the best way possible, the way that puts us in the best light. The strongest arguments in opposition to fudging your age and weight stats was that it was misrepresentation, but is a current picture that is taken in such a manner to present the subject in the maximum positive light different? How?

 

If a guy is wearing baggy clothes or standing behind his wife in every picture, I am assuming he's hiding a big belly. I see lots of profiles where the guy is always behind the woman. It's not misrepresentation, but again... I am more likely to assume he's not showing it because it's not attractive. At least if we meet, I don't have reason to think they are lying, though I might be disappointed. That's the difference with plain old deception (putting the wrong age or weight) and just not showing some weak points, which might be a bummer but at least isn't insulting to me.

 

Nothing wrong with wearing makeup either. I wear makeup when we go out, so I have it on in our pictures. One of our private pictures shows me in stage makeup, but the rest are in "normal going out" makeup or even less. I actually am not sure I should have the one in stage makeup on the page, because it doesn't show me as I'd look if you met me... false eyelashes do a lot for a girl.

[TheLorax 173]

Thanks for the thoughtful reply, The Fuse.

 

I think that for me a lot of attraction is simply things that are impossible to describe or picture (as it is for a lot of people I am sure). I don't know if it is an artifact of many years on the net or I've just gotten older and more cynical. The things I pay attention to most are the text and how well they express themselves. Sure, pictures and descriptions play some role in it for me, but that's mostly for broad ranges rather than specifics. I'm going to buck the (admittedly) short trend in this post. If there's stats that they post that aren't 100% accurate, it doesn't bother me at all unless they are so out of whack with reality that it reinforces the other cues I get from meeting people that they aren't who or what they are trying to present themselves as. I think my base assumption is that they are either wishful thinking (a human enough fault), or they are trying to portray themselves as they would be perceived in person. If it's the first, I'll balance it out with other qualities the people might have. If it's the latter then as long as it's inline with what I see, I really don't care if their age or weight is a few years off. If it's just a troll looking to waste everyone's time then that'll be pretty obvious.

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

Ah, so what does the group think about posting the age and weight you look? For example, I look ten years younger than I am. I also look about thirty pounds lighter than I am because I'm dense (and not just in the head!).

Jen looks like she's twenty pounds lighter than she is (strong girl

 

 

I pretty much agree with what everyone has said... be honest. But if you think you look younger/thinner whatever then feel free to post that you are 60 but most people think you are 40 (if that's the case). Or if she weighs 150 but wears a size 6 then post that. Things like that help clarify what you look like when there's not a picture to go by. But, just posting a different age as your age because you think you look younger (or people tell you you do) isn't a good idea. Put the real thing in the stats then use the profile areas to expand.

[PB&J 1,086]

Here's some input on the age thing. We met a couple at the club last weekend. I'd chatted online with him and he seemed pretty cool, although obviously I wasn't going to make any decisions until we met, and it wasn't a date at the club, just an opportunity to say hi. Now, on their profile his age was well within a decade of mine, and I'm not averse to playing that high up. Some of my best "friends" fall close to if not more than 10 years older than me! However, either this man is really old for his age, or he made a substantial misrepresentation in his profile, and honestly, it's the misrepresentation more than the actual age which really turned me off. Hell, maybe he really feels that he does look that young- but really, honesty IS the best policy with potential playmates.

[SaSsyNsWeEt 41]

I have a few "profile pet peeves" too, however, most have already been touched on. Personally I HATE profiles that are covered in smiley faces, I think it to be very immature!

[MN Tom 251]

Horrible spelling is definitely one for us. It's fine if someone messes up grammar a little bit, but failing miserably at spelling really turns us off.

 

We dad someone like that reply to us today. He spelled every third word incorrectly, and I really struggled to send a reply for the wife since she just couldn't do it.

 

 

Another big pet peeve is when we contact a single male (yeah!) and he responds really lamely or not at all (even though he's online daily and we see him in chat or other areas). Then, a few weeks later, we see him in chat or some other active spot, and he proceeds to spam us with mail or requests to meet up like no time has passed.

 

That is just a huge turn off, it's like why couldn't you at least reply back to us a while ago. We have it obviously labeled in our profile that we have kids and have to schedule. We figure that he was "busy" at the time we contacted him and now he's not, and drop him from consideration at that point. Pretty much we feel that he failed to consider us at first, or just figured we would wait for him since he's soooo great and all (haha).

[EroticImaginati 16]

Our pet peeve is when people type up a profile in "Text-ese". Using "ur" for your, "g2b" for got to be, etc seems to make it more difficult to read. Also, the "Explain this later" answer to questions shows us they are either too lazy to fill out their profile or that they don't know what they are looking for yet (which, to us, screams "AVOID!!").

[Dancing2Some 57]

We dislike very sparse profiles. It's ok to have a short profile as long as it has some real content, but the profiles that have two or three sentences per category, we tend to breeze by. We just feel that your profile should represent who you are, and if it lacks any kind of creativity, intrigue or entertainment value, then for us it would probably make for a less than exciting first meeting. Usually these profiles announce themselves with the same tired, or long expired tagline too. Our profile is a little wordy, but we try and keep it somewhat fun spirited and entertaining Ages? We think they should honestly represent reality. The same with weights, though in all honesty we can understand why some leave the weights blank. In our cases, we removed weight a couple of months ago when we both decided to undergo some lifestyle changes (no, not this lifestyle). It's true, we let life's comforts sneak up on us the past few years. It just didn't make sense to have to keep changing these numbers every few weeks as we shed a little extra weight. We just figure that we have plenty of pics and are always adding more, and since we don't use the websites to arrange blind dates anymore, but rather find others that attend the same lifestyle bar and swinger events that we do, it was somewhat a mute point.

[losAmantes 318]

There's a lot of good info on this thread, very helpful for anyone with a profile online. We've been free members on Swing Lifestyle, paid members, and finally, lifetime members. We've gone from not accepting certs, to accepting them. Our profile has evolved to match how we search and screen other profiles. We keep our ages accurate and our pics are updated regularly, most being less than three months old. We would rather be brutally honest than trick people into meeting, hoping they won't notice inaccuracies (much better they be pleasantly surprised!). Our favorite pet peeve is profiles with yellowed pics that were obviously taken with a kodak instamatic in the '70's, complete with vintage hairstyles and clothes, LOL! Certs are important to us when we're screening profiles. Certs give us insight into if we'd be compatible based on past playmates. Certs also tell us you're real, especially if we know some of them. We're pretty good at spotting bogus certs and weeding out certs from M&G's. We've found that most swingers won't put their reputations on the line to cert couples that don't match their profile descriptions. When we see profiles that have been up for several years with no certs, we usually pass them by, big red flag for us. That being said, we'd love to hear from those that don't accept certs, just in case we're missing something.

[djjwp 129]

We prefer someone who is a decent wordsmith but know in this day brb, lol, and lofrof rule now.

[prairieshadows 95]

How many of you are offended by misspelled words? ABSOLUTELY!!! We know people make spelling errors, and not all use spell check, but if most of the add is misspelled words, it says something to us about the people who posted the ad.

 

Or words used out of context? There again, a bit of a red flag to us.

 

Or by "text style" wording (not to be confused with textile... refer to previous question)? Yes, especially if it's hard to read.

 

Do you prefer words to be spelled out? YES!! Don't mind some short hand with some words, but sometimes you just have a hard time reading it.

[celtic239 297]

Weight "0" pounds = WTF

[StewartP 171]

People who describe themselves as "beginners" when they've been subscribed to a site for over 2 years, and still have no profile photo.

 

Profiles that are single female but from the description you find out it is actually a couple and now you have no info on the man at all.

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

If I see one more "smokin hot bod" or profile that actually says they are "Ken & Barbie" I might scream. I'm glad that you have self-esteem, everyone should but a little humility also goes a long way. I'd much rather seem a profile with pictures that I think are SMOKIN HOT where they describe themselves as "average". To me that just screams that they really are smokin hot in looks and personality (and yes those profiles do exist, about as often as the ones who describe themselves as "smokin hot".)

[Playhardharder 15]

Most but not all have been listed but wanted to add my thoughts - long time lurker decided it is time to get in the game and share.

 

Spelling - not a deal breaker to have a few mistakes or typos but having a profile that looks like it was written by a 10 year old is a sure No.

No pics at all - we only have 1 public pic but it's honest and represents very well - and we certainly open face pics to those we email.

Out of date tag lines - 'Looking for fun on New Years Eve' in July - and online in July

27 pictures of ankles

 

Thanks - I feel better

 

(male half)

[PB&J 1,086]

We just said thanks but no thanks to a local couple around our age. At first I thought what the hell, why not, then looked again at the ad.

 

First, it was on a site which requires you to rate your attractiveness. We rate ourselves as average, because hey, we're not about to toot our own horn, and we figure we'll let people make up their own minds. This couple listed themselves as "Very good-looking". Now, that is red flag, especially when by looking at their face pics, we can see that although they are just fine, they are, in fact, average. This hits the wrong note for me.

 

Next, their ad and their note to us were both full of careless grammar/spelling errors. They had been on the site for months, so had every opportunity to go in and polish it up (heck, I never hit the "post" button for an ad until I have read it over. and over. and over.) I care about putting my best foot forward in my writing, and this just bothered the heck out of me.

 

Lastly, they had felt it necessary to include in their photo album multiple pictures of their BIG boat. Not in the water. Not a shot of them aboard looking happy and socializing, half-nekkid, etc, etc. No, multiple pictures of BIG BOAT on custom trailer looking as BIG as possible.

 

So we said no to a drinks date. We may have been missing out on an AMAZING couple, who knows? But our time out is rare enough that we need to make decisions based on what we see online- and those three things just weren't doing it for us.

[shrevecouple 252]

All the people 50+ "We look younger than our age" (hint...to those of us 20 years younger 99% of the time...yes...you look your age)

[Chicup 41]

Just saw this today.

 

"We are a little larger than average" - Her stats 5'8", 300 lbs., his just slightly better.

 

I just wonder what they think "large" is then.

[angelkin 1,326]

Wow...just wow.

[LFM2 1,482]

They should have left the word "little" out of the description.

[wdm_emm 15]

Our biggest pet peeve is folks who have no pics, insisting on getting face pics or they will not reply. WTF?? You can't see them, but they want to see you first? Frak that. We just pass them by.

[cplnuswing 4,712]

I try to not be too much the grammar cop, but then there is one like this. Can't you put at least SOME effort into it?

 

We Are Looking For:

"looking for another couple or group that is willig to help expand our sexuall experience"

 

Description :

"were oth white americans very athletic and very sexually active"

 

Our fantasies and/or real experiences:

"being in a room with nothing but beautiful wemon with just me and my girl"

 

What else we'd like to say, do, see, hear about and/or learn:

[Chicup 41]

Ugh its 2012 and a new couple STILL used their wedding picture as their main and only picture. Every damn PHONE has a digital camera and you use a wedding picture (and not even a closeup, hard to see them) as your profile picture?

[divenaked 325]

Just gave up on reading a profile on SLS. Local couple, may even run into them at a social someday. After getting about halfway through the "What We Are Looking For" heading, I decided to count the number of lines written: 66. I did not bother with even counting into the "Description" section, or beyond. Really????

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

Just gave up on reading a profile on SLS. Local couple, may even run into them at a social someday. After getting about halfway through the "What We Are Looking For" heading, I decided to count the number of lines written: 66. I did not bother with even counting into the "Description" section, or beyond. Really????

 

Was it ours? Ours is pretty long... at least I think that till I go read some of the others.

[divenaked 325]

Was it ours? Ours is pretty long... at least I think that till I go read some of the others.

 

I've read your profile before. This one just went on and on and on.....

[FunnyBright 15]

My biggest peeve is getting no responses back. Are you a respectful enthusiast or not? Show respect to your fellow hobbyist and be courteous. It's OK to reject someone based on a photo. We can handle that...

[Hippiegirlie 276]

Spelling, grammar and text lingo has to be my biggest peeve. If you can't take the time to use spellcheck, why would I expect you to take the time to be a good partner? The second (and I don't know if this is because I'm single or it’s universal) is those who claim to be open and not looking for a relationship, but after one or two encounters it becomes obvious that they are. I could go off on a whole other topic about how people claim to want NSA or FWB and, in reality, just can't do it... but that would turn in to a rant and I just don't want to go there.

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

we are new to the whole deal but are wide open and ready to go.

but you've had this profile since 2008!

[Chicup 41]

My biggest peeve is getting no responses back. Are you a respectful enthusiast or not? show respect to your fellow hobbyist and be courteous. It's OK to reject someone based on a photo. We can handle that...

 

Unless the reason to not play is obvious and not a physical attraction thing, we learned that rejecting someone based on looks (which is obvious at times) will get you hate mail quite often.

[Guest satelng]

We don't like when people say that they are drug free and then say that they are into 420.

[junglecouple 127]

that's just a sign of the coming times. It wasn't all that long ago that alcohol was illegal, (and still is in many counties here). I'd much rather be in the company of someone high on pot than on alcohol. And I don't remember anytime in my life, seeing a belligerent person due to 420. Would you feel the same way in Colorado or Washington..? Is it the drug, or the law that bothers you... We don't see anyone that smokes cigarettes, but that's just personal choice... Drink too much... there's the door. I think 420 is neither wrong, nor bothersome, unlike many of the other available legal vices.