Pregnant from swinging. What would you do?

[goindown692010 15]

Don't know if this one was brought up on here but here goes...

 

We fully swapped with our best friends...great time. But about 3 weeks later my best friend's woman ended up pregnant (forgot her pill)... it was a horrible experience for my fiance because there was about a 50-80% chance that child was mine.

 

My friend's woman ended the pregnancy, but I want to know how would you here handle the situation?

 

This really put a halt on any swinging activities for a few months because my fiance was really upset...and also any chances of swapping with them again if you can imagine.

 

Anyhow...this was a couple years ago so it is past...but I figured that I would share that here to see if anyone else has had that experience or something similar?

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

This topic has come up many times on the board, usually brought up by trolls (people trying to start drama) which is probably why your question here got well... ignored. You can view quite a few of the past threads on this question by searching the tag Pregnancy. If you read through those past threads you'll get a pretty good idea of why this thread probably got ignored by most (based on the direction that those others went).

 

That said, I do think this is a good hypothetical that people need to think through. Unfortunately, I think in the end it is something that most won't think about until they are forced to (by being put in the situation).

[WesternSwing 504]

It is a situation Mrs. WS and I have had to really think about in the past year because I got the Big-V about eight months ago and she quit taking The Pill. So she is very, very careful with condoms because she is fertile. She has stated, and we have decided that if she did get pregnant we would not keep it and we'd quietly have an abortion.* This is not something we'd want to have to explain to our older two kids who know I'm not capable of having more kids.

 

Mr. WS

 

* For the record, Mrs. WS and I have always been Pro-Choice, though we have both felt that abortion wasn't for us. My first wife had one when we were still dating when 20 and 18, and it was not something I'd want to go through again. It didn't really effect me then, but when our first child (planned this time) was born 6 years later it all hit me like a speeding truck. So this is not a decision we've come to without a great amount of soul-searching together.

[goindown692010 15]

it was really hard to deal with...my fiance and my buddies girl are best friends also so it made it really really weird all around...we are all still best friends to this day and are probably even closer now...

 

well thanks for the replys here..i just wanted to make other ppl aware that this situation is a defenant possiblility in this lifestyle.

 

and just think about the situation and how you may handle it so if it does happen to you your already preprared

 

thank you

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

I think for many it's a situation that is just so scary they don't want to think about it. It's one of those "it won't happen to me" things. If it hasn't happened to them or to someone they know then people tend to look at it almost as an "urban legend" type thing. It can happen and it is something to think about.

 

I posted a question a while back asking if this happened to you, would you even want to know if the baby was yours or a swing partner's.

[djjwp 129]

I have had a vasectomy so my partners would be safe but the wife is not on the pill. Our solution is to watch dates and look for V safe couples as well. We are pro-life so if she did get PG, we paint a room pink or blue and move on. I was raised by my step father so to me it would be no big deal.

[tankman101 15]

50-80% chance that child was mine.

 

Forgive, but I'm puzzled with that percentage chance. How do you arrive at 50 -80%???

[DiscreetDesires 32]

This particular topic is what brought hubby and myself to learn about this site and was glad to have found a home here where no question was "too taboo" to ask.

 

We had posed the question on one of the sites that we are members of, and the question didn't go so well. (No one wants to think about it)

I searched the internet in regards to that, and it led me here.

 

We approach each and every aspect of the lifestyle with each other and talk throughly about things that could happen before they ever become a possibility.

Hubby is V-safe, while I am still very fertile.. so it's a definite possibility with us. Neither of us would want to raise another man's baby while bringing drama into our personal lives with our family because he has had a vasectomy.

 

When we are closer to reaching a full swap status, I am sure that we will discuss this further, but for now it has been left in the file cabinet.

We know that we have a few possibilities being (all including condom usage): (a) Only playing with couples where the man is V safe, (b) not playing during my highest level of fertility, © If anything is suspected.. using a morning after pill, (d) finding a BC pill that would work for me, and (e) getting sterilized myself.

 

Neither of us feels right about going the abortion route. While it may be a good option for others, it would not be for us.

[DiscreetDesires 32]

Thank you!

I'd rather think about them beforehand, than to worry about it afterwards!

[xxxboxy 139]

Pretty much the same situation as Mrs.xxxboxy and I are in, she's on BC but we couple that with condoms and being aware of timing.