Single Girl Profiles

[lovelygirl2 39]

First off, we're not one of those couples who's sole purpose is to find a single girl. If one fell into our lap, we wouldn't turn it down, but we don't go looking.

 

But I have read a few single girl profiles lately that have me scratching my head. (and I know they are real people because of certs that I know the source)

 

One today went on and on about how she likes to be the center of attention and that she usually is because she is sooooo hot. Another one stated flat out - I'm the single girl, I get to make the rules. Another one said - it's about my pleasure, not yours.

 

Does this turn anyone else off? I wouldn't play with one of these girls if you paid me. Do people really fall for that BS?

 

My personal opinion is that these types are the ones paid by certain Meet&Greet promotors to fluff... but I'm not positive.

[VegasLee 1,486]

We would have no interest in anyone that made those type of statements, single women, men or couples. There are some of each that do make those type of statements.

 

People tend to forget that most of the time the attraction is attitude, not looks.

 

I am sure there are some out there that would go along though just to get to the "unicorn."

[cocpl2007 170]

Generally speaking we've discovered it takes a very big head to support a unicorn!

[LFM2 1,482]

Dave and I have also read some statements like that in profiles.

 

Like VegasLee said, it is the attitude that attracts us.

 

We've crossed them off our possibilities list.

[Pensacolapair 394]

Does this turn anyone else off?

 

On a list of sought-after/fantasized activities within the Lifestyle, we suspect that FMF is probably rather high up there

 

Having said that, we never realized it was such a big deal until we began seeking out and meeting other couples for play. It just turned out that our first few encounters as a couple in the Lifestyle (many moons ago) were all with single females. Looking back on it, we pretty much attribute our 'luck' in that regards to our former occupations, which exposed us to quite a few 'unconventional' people in circumstances suprisingly amenable to sexy fun. Having 'come up' in the Lifestyle from there, we tend to have a different attitude towards single women as playmates... we're not going to treat single women any different than we do anyone else we might meet - nor do we expect them to conduct themselves differently from anyone else.

 

As an observation, we have noticed that over the last few years single women in the Lifestyle are starting to develop a similar negative reputation to that held by many couples towards single men in the Lifestyle...for a lot of the same reasons! People tend to do what they can get away with. Unfortunatly, some people will accept poor behavior in order to recognize a fantasy...and others are more than willing to take advantage of that.

[lovelygirl2 39]

I agree with Lee that this comes in all forms - I've seen some couples as well that have some pretty bold statements in their profiles. It just seems more prevalent with single females - and I think they get away with it more because they are so sought after. I just can't believe anyone could have that inflated of an opinion about themself.

 

My hubby and I also tend to subscribe to the belief that these types are probably not very good in bed anyway. Their over-inflated egos lead them to believe that just being HOT is all they need to bring to the table - the pleasing is up to the person who is honored enough to be with them. Not either of our idea of a good time

 

The opposite holds true as well - I don't want a single guy who is just going to worry about me without any respect to his own pleasure. A good play session is about the give and take, the mutual pleasure - the sitting back at the end and going - DAMN that was fun

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

A lot of the site (some more than others) have what they call "angels" which are basically fake profiles set up to make it look like they have more of whatever. Single females are the most common (AFF is notorious for this). Somehow I doubt tho that those profiles for single females would sound that way. I think (and from some personal experience with some single women) that those profiles are REAL single females. And yes those profile would be a turn off to me whether it was in the profile of a SF, couple or SM. I don't want anyone who feels they are doing ME a favor by showing up, nor do I want to feel like I'm doing THEM a favor by showing up. I would hope it would be mutual fun for all of us.

[arvcpl 16]

If they are so hot why are they single in the first place?

Most of the single fems I have encountered in the real world at clubs and parties etc would be considered mediocre at best in the vanilla world. A lot are downright not attractive at all and are probably invisable in the vanilla world but yet get dozens of hits a day on their profile and have couples and single guys falling all over themselves at lifetyle events. Many probably are after the attention and even with over the top comments like that they probably still get tons of responses and lots of attention and strokes. Some of them are probably popular for the fist time in their lives.

I know i am making a pretty bold stab at the sacred cow but just calling it like I see it. I'm not even saying that is necessarily a bad thing. If they are having fun and not getting hurt and are not hurting anyone else, so what? Everyone needs to get some attention and some lovin' now and then.

[Playful1 434]

Wow, I am a single woman and couldn't even begin to imagine writing something like that on my profile! Heck, I have one guy friend (swinger) who tells me I could get away with all kinds of things because I'm attractive, but I just dont get why. I'm not any more special than a couple...I'm just often in heavy demand.

 

Unfortunately, just as there are single guys that give the others a bad name, there are plenty of single women who give us good ones a bad name. I think some get spoiled because often they do become the center of attention, and just start to assume that they deserve it simply for being a single woman.

 

I would not write a woman that had that kind of stuff on her profile. It's one thing to be confident, another to be cocky.

[Playful1 434]

If they are so hot why are they single in the first place?

.

 

Just had to say real quick...

 

how about because they want to be? I am considered very attractive, and I am single...not because I can't get someone but because I dont want someone.

 

Just because someone is single, doesn't mean they aren't "hot".

 

end threadjack

[lovinher 505]

Wow! With that kind of attitude it explains why they are single-hot or not.

We would pass. No matter how "hot" they are.

[arvcpl 16]

Just had to say real quick...

 

how about because they want to be? I am considered very attractive, and I am single...not because I can't get someone but because I dont want someone.

 

Just because someone is single, doesn't mean they aren't "hot".

 

end threadjack

 

I am sure you are perfectly nice and attractive and I will accept your assertion that you are single by choice. But my question is will you be single by choice by next Tuesday? I realize there are always exceptions but most people want to be in a relationship. If someone is attractive and nice and interested in sex the chances are usually good that they will have a partner of their own. Very very very few people truly choose to be a career single. If somone has all the qualitys that would make them desirable and yet they are still single the questions does arise as to why. I'm not saying it is always bad. But sometimes it is. They either have some kind of problem or they actually do have a partner that is sitting at home clueless as to what they are doing.

[gnb4u 15]

I think for the most part people get what they ask for and are treated the way they ask to be treated. Our profiles are our billboards and people approach us they way our profiles tell the world to approach us.

 

Over the years I have known single vanilla chicks in the dating world who marketed themselves as high maintenence and even as gold diggers and they never had a lack of people conforming to their wishes. Now I may not consider the guys they got as the cream of the crop by any means but the guys that did show up on their doorstep provided them with what they asked for. I guess I don't see this as any different.

 

I may not be interested in them or like their approach on how they describe themselves on their profiles but there are probably those that do and of those that do they probably are ready, willing able to lavish attention on them and abide completely by their wishes so I guess everyone comes out ok in the end.

[Playful1 434]

I am sure you are perfectly nice and attractive and I will accept your assertion that you are single by choice. But my question is will you be single by choice by next Tuesday? I realize there are always exceptions but most people want to be in a relationship. If someone is attractive and nice and interested in sex the chances are usually good that they will have a partner of their own. Very very very few people truly choose to be a career single. If somone has all the qualitys that would make them desirable and yet they are still single the questions does arise as to why. I'm not saying it is always bad. But sometimes it is. They either have some kind of problem or they actually do have a partner that is sitting at home clueless as to what they are doing.

 

I have to say I find it a bit offensive that you seem to assume that there must be something wrong with a person who truly does choose to stay single. Being in a relationship is not the only healthy option out there. Just as being married isn't for everyone, being in a relationship isn't for everyone either. I happen to choose to be single because there is nothing I can get form having a bf that I am not currently getting somewhere in my life. Honestly, I think if society would lay off making it seem like being in a relationship was the only truly healthy thing and if you're not there must be something wrong, then more people, particularly women I think, would choose to single, either for good or for a lot longer than they do now.

[arvcpl 16]

I have to say I find it a bit offensive that you seem to assume that there must be something wrong with a person who truly does choose to stay single. Being in a relationship is not the only healthy option out there. Just as being married isn't for everyone, being in a relationship isn't for everyone either. I happen to choose to be single because there is nothing I can get form having a bf that I am not currently getting somewhere in my life. Honestly, I think if society would lay off making it seem like being in a relationship was the only truly healthy thing and if you're not there must be something wrong, then more people, particularly women I think, would choose to single, either for good or for a lot longer than they do now.

 

I didn't say that there is anything wrong with someone being single, I said that there is a reason. sometimes the reason is perfectly valid and sometimes it isn't but because someone is single does not mean they are defective. I was single untill I was in my early 30s and people treated me diferently and I wasn't even in the lifesyle at the time. People treated me with caution and suspicion in the vanilla world. A lot of people are independant and feel that they have it all and then when they meet the right person whammo they realize they want more. I am an old fashioned romantic guy and my beliefs are pretty ingrained. I think the vast vast majority of people want to have someone to have and to hold and I think that the vast majority of people who swear they are perfectly happy being single by choice are just rationalizing away their current plight. I don't think that more people should be single. I think more people should admit to themselves that they want to have their own special someone in their lives and give themselves permission to seek that someone and be open to the possibilities rather than trying to convince themselves that they really want to be single. If you say you are single by choice I accept your choice and respect your decision. My challenge to you though is to search your true feelings and be true to yourself. If you truly want to lead your own life as a single at this time then do so and enjoy it to the fullest. However if that changes and deep down you do want someone to come home to and hold at the end of the day then accept that within yourself and pursue that to the best of your abilities.

[Malachista 170]

Over here the attitude is quite diffrent

such a statement pretty much means that a female has enough of the guys who only think of them as a cheap way to get rid of their biological waste.

 

There are just enough guys who will be quite nice until they get you to bed, then they just want to penentrate and cum as fast as possible.

Pretty much all single profiles include the rule that there will be no penentration until the female had at least one orgasm of her own...

[AskMeOk 148]

We simply would have no interest in meeting somebody with that sort of egotistical attitude. I give them props, though, for being honest.... saves us time! Others may like to play the game and accept the tossed gauntlet. Who knows.....

[Karmickiss 28]

Hi All,

Ack! I cannot imagine being so...conceited, and/or self-centered(as examples of those ads). I can't believe that I only now have heard the term "unicorn"..lol. When I first was serious about getting into the lifestyle, I was honestly naieve about being a "hot commodity", and still don't see myself as special in that regard. BUT...I have to agree that it's disheartening to hear there must be something "wrong" with me as to why I'm single. I do feel that it's not always the healthiest thing to be with someone for the sake of having "someone/anyone". I have learnt more things about myself being single, but have also spent much time with someone. I'm told I'm attractive, but it's in the eye of the beholder, I guess, and would never assume to fit everyone's idea of "hot".

Actually, I have been single for three years now, besides some casual dates, and maybe a couple long-time play partners for a night or two who are also good friends, and only rarely hooking up. The reason for me has been simple...I lost my long time partner to sudden death three years ago, and it totally devestated me. B/c of this, I didn't feel I could give of myself 100 percent, and the grief was so heavy, it would have been dangerously tempting to latch on to someone for the wrong reasons, which would be incredibly unfair to whoever that person would be. I needed timed to heal, and being older and a little wiser, I have taken my time....and yes...I do get lonely sometimes, but have enough healthy people in my life to not feel that too intensely. I'm not as lonely as I am missing the connection I lost. He was not into swinging(though feel we would have made it there, started being open to it in the end) and b/c I loved him unconditionally, I found out that wow.....when there is really that "right" person in your life, nothing seems like a "sacrifice".

I'm open to playing well with others..wink...but after really having a mature, stable, and satisfying relationship like that, well, maybe I've become more picky, as I see being in a commited relationship to be a sacred thing, that I wouldn't want to rush, and feel like it will probably come when least expecting it. I am open, really am, to being with a special someone again....but need to feel the connection on many levels.

Honestly, in the past, I thought it would be a bit boring, monogamy, and didn't think I could be with someone never wanting to have some adventure. I understood "growing" with someone intellectually only, had no idea how beautiful that really is. Beautiful, and a lot of work..I couldn't believe that nothing ever got "old" for me, with the man I'm referring to.

I guess I've been working on myself, so that I can be a better, more complete part of a whole with someone, one day if it's meant to be...I'd love it. For one,something I learned from this prior relationship is that I truly know what I want, and what I don't want, how freeing!

I'm feeling optimistic, b/c the things that make me the happiest are things one could never buy. I really can appreciate beauty, but for me, it's what's on the inside that really does it for me. I would not be interested in anyone as self centered and callous as was mentioned about the ads, either. This is a good thread, eye opening, for me, as a single female. I haven't really been able to "advertise".....and maybe I should put myself "out there" more, but I feel funny about it. I have noticed, though, that now that I'm feeling "ready" I must be giving off subliminal messages...lol...as I've been either bumping into people who do swing, or are interested in doing so....and even finding out about couples that I've known for a long time, but had no idea they were interested in swinging. I don't push myself or anyone else, but being able to admit to being open, and being asked some questions....well, it brought me back to this site,actually, b/c I found such valuable insight in avoiding potential disasters, and in being able to take my time in getting to know people. Wow, that's enough from me, great thread! Sincerely, karmic

[AskMeOk 148]

If they are so hot why are they single in the first place?

Most of the single fems I have encountered in the real world at clubs and parties etc would be considered mediocre at best in the vanilla world. A lot are downright not attractive at all and are probably invisable in the vanilla world ....

 

Hot is as hot does. We're way more about people with attractive personalities and manners. Miss. Beauty of the World isn't really desirable at all if she is also Miss. Bitch of the World, too.....

 

Beauty is only skin deep. Bitch goes all the way to the bone....

[Chicup 41]

Old thread, I know, but the first thing that came to mind for me reading it was....

[twoforone100 45]

Of the single females we have played with... All of AFF... they have had a one line profile. No pic.. some used the chat room and some did not... two were smoking hot and one was good looking..... We have only met one on sls.. and yes she is hot and her profile is sort of like the OP's question. YMMV

[WesternSwing 504]

No, I wouldn't play with one whose profile stated those things, but I'm sure she'll find some people with the same attitudes about themselves that will.

[absingleman 178]

First off, we're not one of those couples who's sole purpose is to find a single girl. If one fell into our lap, we wouldn't turn it down, but we don't go looking.

 

But I have read a few single girl profiles lately that have me scratching my head. (and I know they are real people because of certs that I know the source)

 

One today went on and on about how she likes to be the center of attention and that she usually is because she is sooooo hot. Another one stated flat out - I'm the single girl, I get to make the rules. Another one said - it's about my pleasure, not yours.

 

Does this turn anyone else off? I wouldn't play with one of these girls if you paid me. Do people really fall for that BS?

 

My personal opinion is that these types are the ones paid by certain Meet&Greet promotors to fluff... but I'm not positive.

 

Funny. This girl IM'd me a few months ago. I'm paraphrasing but this is how the conversation went.

 

Her: Are you busy?

Me: No, I'm just waiting for my updates to download, then I'm going to bed. How are you?

Her: So can you come over if I give you my address?

Me: Uh, its two in the morning and I have to work tomorrow. But maybe on the weekend we could meet.

Her: Look at my profile. I'm sure I'd be worth your time. And I'm visiting a friend who lives close to you, just a few miles away from you. (She was hot but...)

Me: Well, I get off work at 3pm. We can meet tomorrow at Pizza Hut and go from...

Her: Where do you live? I can come there instead. If you leave your light on I can find your place easy enough. Are you north or south of town?

Me: If you had contacted me earlier I would have probably said yes. I can meet you tomorrow.

Her: I can get laid right now, but I woke up from a dream and wanted a black guy. If you won't come I can find someone who will.

Me: Go ahead. I was busy anyway.

 

 

As bad as those profiles you quoted were, chatting with the girl (not woman) who wrote it is worse.

[Swing*8701 887]

Susan here-- I was the proverbial Unicorn for three years. I have to admit that many of the married couples I played with were surprised that I viewed the threesome as an equal partnership and that I gave sexually of myself as much and typically more than they did. I had a blast and equally important, so did they .

[DigginIt 1,132]

Having just recently been participating in another thread that talks about encounters being 'like porn' where the guys are rough or too aggressive I could live with a single female stating what they want sexually in a FMF scenario and respecting that but it can be stated without saying "I'm the fucking bomb and you are lucky if you cock gets within 10 feet of me".

 

I get enough of 'mini' FMF and MFM in couple group encounters that I'm happy enough.

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

First off, we're not one of those couples who's sole purpose is to find a single girl. If one fell into our lap, we wouldn't turn it down, but we don't go looking.

 

But I have read a few single girl profiles lately that have me scratching my head. (and I know they are real people because of certs that I know the source)

 

One today went on and on about how she likes to be the center of attention and that she usually is because she is sooooo hot. Another one stated flat out - I'm the single girl, I get to make the rules. Another one said - it's about my pleasure, not yours.

 

I know a SF whose profile reads pretty similar to this (as does her attitude). She always wants to be the center of attention and that's why she enjoys swinging. She's a friend but there's no way I'd play with her. She also tends to bring drama everywhere she goes.

[cplnuswing 4,713]

She always wants to be the center of attention ...............She also tends to bring drama everywhere she goes.

 

I have found that those two things are highly correlated, rarely do you see one without the other. For many, the need for the first is so overwhelming they will do the second to fulfill it. It's almost subconscious I think, I'm not even sure they do it on purpose. I still find it very unattractive though.

[MechanicalAngel 15]

Just had to say real quick...

 

how about because they want to be? I am considered very attractive, and I am single...not because I can't get someone but because I dont want someone.

 

Just because someone is single, doesn't mean they aren't "hot".

 

end threadjack