Seperate Room Only - Why?

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

For those of you who choose to only play in seperate rooms from each other, what is your reasoning?

 

Is it because one partner can't concentrate when the other partner is there to watch? Is it jealousy? Is it something else?

[JustMrJ 178]

My wife and I played in separate rooms when we went on a 'double date' with another couple. We could easily hear everyone, but we were not within sight.

 

Didn't bother us, but it also wasn't required. It was just easier for us to be on the mattress in the living room and them on the bed in the bedroom.

 

Either way wouldn't matter to us as long as we could hear each other.

[funcpl4life 51]

Mrs. FC4L is too easily distracted. She doesn't mind lots of same room foreplay and even play, but needs to focus to "get over".

 

Mr. FC4L

[theflamekasters 20]

we can do same room, but prefer seperate, simply becuase we can focus on the person we are with. We know we are going home together, soe we want to get the most out of the person we are with. We have found that cpls that only play same room have some form of trust issue most of the time!

[MIbbwcpl 67]

Mrs. FC4L is too easily distracted. She doesn't mind lots of same room foreplay and even play, but needs to focus to "get over".

 

Mr. FC4L

 

I never thought of it like that. I could see it being beneficial to me for that very reason. Hmm....

[cplnuswing 4,713]

we can do same room, but prefer seperate, simply becuase we can focus on the person we are with.

 

We have done both, and up to this point, prefer separate for the reason listed above. There was initially some worry about jealousy too being in the same room, but that hasn't turned out to be such a big deal as the distraction issue.

 

In the end though, we really don't have strong feelings either way, just kinda whatever works out best for everyone.

[Tia Vampire 167]

We also can go either way, but prefer seperate rooms for the same reasons everyone else has stated. In the beginning it was for jealousy reasons, but now we have come a long way.

[good times 991]

we can do same room, but prefer seperate, simply becuase we can focus on the person we are with.

Yep, same thing for us. While we do both, and both same room and separate room are fun for different reasons. For maximum sexual pleasure, separate rooms seems to take it up a notch for us.

[Ave Satanas 20]

For my SO and myself, we prefer separate rooms because we have had situations with first-timers where the guys had difficulty getting going when other guys are in the room. Most guys we've dealt with tend to get nervous and feel like the situation is a competition or something (obviously not the case), a problem that is only made worse when I can get going and they can't. It makes it easier on everyone to be in separate rooms.

[Sir Dude 15]

Since we've never swapped it has always been same room. I enjoy watching my wife in action but I would consider seperate room if the chance ever presented itself. I'd have to be really comfortable with the other couple to do so.

 

The reasons people gave above make perfect sense.

[Menage_a_Trois 182]

We will go either way, but our preference is seperate. Like everyone else has already stated it is because we can focus all our attention on our play partners and vice versa. We don't mind same room, and have done so many times. We do get a bit frustrated when we meet a couple who insist on same room, and then while playing they constantly have to look at or touch their SO, keeping their attention on them instead of who they are playing with. We have found this to be more of a territorial or insecurity issue, than just being "turned on" by watching them.

[willyoats 324]

We do both, probably about 50/50, but I never before thought about why we choose one over the other. It just seemed to happen naturally without much thought.

 

When she is going to play and I don't have a partner, we most often do MFM threesomes, but sometimes she says she wants to be alone with the guy. When she goes without me, it is either because the other guy is a bit shy and she feels he would be inhibited by my presence, or she is REALLY hot for the guy and would be distracted by me. I always prefer to be with her because a big part of my enjoyment in swinging is to see her having a good time with another guy. However, whether I am with her or not is strictly her choice.

 

For me, if I have a partner and she does not, she never asks to come with us.

 

If we both have partners and must decide between same and separate rooms, the choice depends on several things: The other couple may want separate rooms, and that is always OK with us. I usually go along with what the rest of the people want, but if I am the one who has to decide, it depends strictly on the kind of turn-on I feel with my prospective partner. I choose separate rooms when I really want to make love and not just screw. That has happened only a few times.

[cubnamy1995 124]

We started out in the beginning saying we would only do same room. We met a couple at a party who only played separate room, so we thought, what the hell. Well, while it was OK, we really don't swing for one-on-one sex. We learned as we went that we were really in this for group sex. If we want one on one, we will stick with each other 9 time out of 10, except for Amy and another bi woman. Amy(and I suspect most bi women) like the one on one with another woman because of the different pace and sensation. I have no problem with her going off and playing with another girl, or girls. But usually in mixed company, we now stick together.

 

Our urge is not so much to have sex with lots of different people(well, maybe a little), as it is to have sex in lots of creative new ways and combinations.

[hotqld 15]

We have done both, we agree it can be a little awkward with the two males and also if the one girl is straight, its really pairing off on one matress which is not that comfortable.

 

Seperate rooms is more comfortable your attention is undivided can help with Jealous issues but we did have one not so good experiance in seperate rooms where the guy forced his cock into my wives throat....she should have bite it!

 

Guess we will go either way

[theflamekasters 20]

We started out in the beginning saying we would only do same room. We met a couple at a party who only played separate room, so we thought, what the hell. Well, while it was OK, we really don't swing for one-on-one sex. We learned as we went that we were really in this for group sex. If we want one on one, we will stick with each other 9 time out of 10, except for Amy and another bi woman. Amy(and I suspect most bi women) like the one on one with another woman because of the different pace and sensation. I have no problem with her going off and playing with another girl, or girls. But usually in mixed company, we now stick together.

 

Our urge is not so much to have sex with lots of different people(well, maybe a little), as it is to have sex in lots of creative new ways and combinations.

 

 

 

I will say the group sex thing is alot of fun, but we dont ever play same bed. NEither of us enjoy it. SO lots of times it will start with some g on g play then go off in our own direction, or vice versa. Most of the time when it happens that way we are at a club or a HP

[oddcouple 17]

Both are hot!! But sometimes I just want to enjoy the other man by myself. I think I do better for them while we are alone. All my focus goes to making him happy because I don't feel I am having to please everyone! Does that make sense?

[JandJ777 17]

We do both, probably about 50/50, but I never before thought about why we choose one over the other. It just seemed to happen naturally without much thought.

 

When she is going to play and I don't have a partner, we most often do MFM threesomes, but sometimes she says she wants to be alone with the guy. When she goes without me, it is either because the other guy is a bit shy and she feels he would be inhibited by my presence, or she is REALLY hot for the guy and would be distracted by me. I always prefer to be with her because a big part of my enjoyment in swinging is to see her having a good time with another guy. However, whether I am with her or not is strictly her choice.

 

For me, if I have a partner and she does not, she never asks to come with us.

 

If we both have partners and must decide between same and separate rooms, the choice depends on several things: The other couple may want separate rooms, and that is always OK with us. I usually go along with what the rest of the people want, but if I am the one who has to decide, it depends strictly on the kind of turn-on I feel with my prospective partner. I choose separate rooms when I really want to make love and not just screw. That has happened only a few times.

 

Your comment about making love with your swinging partner, and not just sex, concerns me, as part of a couple who is interested in swinging but still discussing our feelins about making sure that we understand the difference between our marriage vs. the sex with others. Everyone else seems adamant that it's just sex. Do you mind if i ask what do you mean by making love with your swinging partner?

[MrsPandMe 150]

We have found that cpls that only play same room have some form of trust issue most of the time!

 

I take exception to this. Mrs. P and I play in the same room because we absolutly love watching as well as playing. It's part of the experience for us. We have never run into a same room couple that had trust issues.

[Alura 2,774]

Both of the above, thanks! We liked to swap into different places for the first and meet as a foursome in the den or bedroom afterwards for a second round. Best of both worlds.

 

I liked to watch Mrs. Alura and she liked "Playing to my audience" as she put it.

 

Alura

[blondie86 15]

Hubby and I are fairly new and it's mainly because of me. I'm not ready for him to watch me yet. It's a self confidence thing. But I know with the right couple I could work up to doing same room. Thought we had a couple it might happen with but it didn't work out. I also echo everyone else that the attention is important as well. One of the reasons I wanted to start doing this is because I love the attention from other males. If I was playing with a guy and he was watching his wife the whole time it might be a turnoff for me.

[prairieshadows 95]

For us we have done and can do both same and separate room, for us we like separate room because like someone else had said, it allows us to focus more on the person we're with. We've had a lot of fun when we've done same room swap as well, but for us, separate room is better for us.

[cplnuswing 4,713]

If I was playing with a guy and he was watching his wife the whole time it might be a turnoff for me.

 

The Mrs. has experienced this and finds it a huge turnoff. She totally gets the turn-on aspect of seeing your partner with someone else, but there is a difference in that and someone who seems to be there themselves only so they can watch their partner. If that is what you are looking for, fine, whatever floats your boat. I'm sure there are plenty of couples out there that would be into that scenario, but it's not us, so not being upfront about that is one of her pet peeves.

 

For us we have done and can do both same and separate room, for us we like separate room because like someone else had said, it allows us to focus more on the person we're with. We've had a lot of fun when we've done same room swap as well, but for us, separate room is better for us.

 

ditto

[Sgts19 17]

As for me I much prefer separate rooms. Why? I get distracted if my wife is in the same room and don’t pay enough attention to the lady I’m with because I’m always sneaking a peek at what she’s doing. Another reason is she tends to be much more animated and freeier if that makes any sense. We’ve videoed each other and I must say she reacts differently with other men when alone with them, in a good wayJ

[Alura 2,774]

...Another reason is she tends to be much more animated and freeier if that makes any sense. We’ve videoed each other and I must say she reacts differently with other men when alone with them, in a good wayJ

 

My wife was a different person when she fucked another man than when we made love. We tried to be more "fun" and more physical with each other but we always ended up locking minds and expressing our gratitude for each other. Isn't the ability to experience differences with another partner one of the attractions to swinging?

 

Alura

[BeStylnIT 114]

cpls that only play same room have some form of trust issue most of the time!

That's bizarre and paranoid!?!

I mean, You're a swinger cpl getting together with another one. So what's going to happen in another room that's not going to happen when you're all in the same one?

[SexySixtiesMW 16]

Even though we're brand new, we discussed at length and want separate rooms. Just relax, enjoy and let nature take over. We will discuss every detail on the way home--if we make it home.....LOL

[Alura 2,774]

That's bizarre and paranoid!?!

I mean, You're a swinger cpl getting together with another one. So what's going to happen in another room that's not going to happen when you're all in the same one?

 

I can answer this one. Mrs. Playmate is going to hear Mrs. Alura enjoying her husband's oversize penis and make the mistake of later asking him, "Is she better than I am?" Mr. Playmate will think about the question and hesitate just a little too long before he answers, "Oh, of course not, Honey, you're better!"

 

Duck while the shit hits the fan.

 

Alura

[sweet_tna 680]

Mr. Sweet prefers same room. He likes to watch me. I, on the other hand, tend to find it distracting at times (especially if I'm concerned about whether he and his partner are having a good time). Separate rooms also ups the "naughty" factor for me, which I find all the hotter. Either way, as long as everyone's having a good time . . .

 

=)

[RDfnd 180]

We've always done same room, but sometimes I have been too distracted by my wife and her partner. I think if we we were in separate rooms, it may be better. Have to give that a try!

[km34 672]

I find myself more distracted when we are in separate rooms. I start wondering what they are doing and how it's going. If we're all in the same room/area I can just look over, know EVERYONE is enjoying themselves, and get on with what I'm doing without worrying that I'm having a better time than hubby is. Odd, maybe, but that's how my brain works, I guess.