How do swingers feel about married males and male bisexuality

[ballman123 19]

Greetings!

 

I am a novice to swinging, but am most anxious to get started. My first question is this...are couples open to married males or does swinging always involve couples only or single males with couples?

 

My second question concerns bi-sexuality. Do women get turned on watching other men suck their husband's/parnter's cock? I am most interested in performing oral sex on a male, but find few bi-curious men at the Swingers Board.

 

How can I convince my desires without sounding like I am a flamer or blatant homosexual? I simply want to taste and swallow a man's load of cum.

[realcplub2 513]

First off, Welcome... You have found the best place on the web to answer any questions you might have..

 

Second there is a whole section devoted to Bisexuality and Swinging located in the member section..

 

Now then.. the issue that most couples have with Married men, playing with without their partner is that fact that NO ONE wants the drama involved in a cheating husband.

 

As far as bi sexuality, this is a forum.. If you are looking for like minded people, its best to check the web sites..

 

For Bi People: Bisexual Playground

 

For Other swinging people: swinglifestyle or Adult Friend Finder

[sweet_tna 680]

Hi! You have definitely come to the right place for answers to those questions. There are several threads under the Bisexuality and Swinging forums, but here are some short answers to your queries:

 

1) Different strokes for different folks. Some couples prefer to only swing with other couples, others prefer only single males, others only single females. You pretty much just have to put what you're looking for in your profile, and be upfront with any potential playmates.

 

2) I personally would not be turned on by my hubby engaging in M/M activities. The reason? He's not interested, and that takes away the appeal for me. That said, I think there are a lot more bi or bi friendly males out there than you'll see on the sites. But because there seems to be a stigma attached (however much a double standard it is) to bisexuality with men, they often list themselves as straight.

 

Hope this helps to get you started.

[2inSanDiego4u 181]

Greetings!

 

I am a novice to swinging, but am most anxious to get started. My first question is this...are couples open to married males or does swinging always involve couples only or single males with couples?

 

My second question concerns bi-sexuality. Do women get turned on watching other men suck their husband's/parnter's cock? I am most interested in performing oral sex on a male, but find few bi-curious men at the Swingers Board.

 

How can I convince my desires without sounding like I am a flamer or blatant homosexual? I simply want to taste and swallow a man's load of cum.

 

Welcome to the forum! From our experience on SLS and AFF thus far, most couples prefer single males as opposed to married males. There is a lot of concern about cheating singles in this lifestyle, it seems.

 

As far as bisexual male sex and her being turned on by it, that depends on the person. The Mrs. once saw some gay male porn, and she said it was on a turn-on. We have seen MANY couples that specifically say they do not want bi males to contact them. The phrase "orally bi" is often used for men who just want to perform oral on another man and/or receive it from another man. Try to find someone compatible and experiment with it!

 

EDIT: Does your partner have any clue that you are having these Bi fantasies and want to act on them?

[Guest MrsVan]

Welcome to the board! You have come to the right place to get all your questions answered so please feel free to ask away...

 

As for your questions, MrVan and I prefer to play with couples, single males or females. We like to keep married men/woman out of our lifestyle because of the drama it can create. We also both have come from previous marriages where our ex-spouses cheated on us with someone else and we just do not want to promote cheating in the LS.

 

As for the question about M/M situations, I would not have any interest in watching MrVan with another man. My reason is because 1) He has no interest in M/M action, 2) It is just not something that turns me on.

 

I think everyone has something that does or does not work for them and the only thing I can say is read the forums and find answers to those questions that you may need more answers on and if you create a profile, just be honest in the profile about what you are looking for.

 

Good luck!

[JDApopka 54]

we enjoy MFM 3 somes single males only.

[ohbaby 19]

A married male who is swinging, chances are his wife doesn't know, so call it what it is. He is cheating and why would we want to be part of that?

[bicuriouscme 16]

This is sooo interesting...I wanted my husband to engage in homosexual (I'm not sure if I'm using the correct language so please forgive me) but I wanted him to talk about being with a man, sucking him, giving him anal, receiving anal, and he did at times (usually impared) but it was the biggest turn on for me...but I find that men get turned off by that...like they are like you said...gay or f.gg.s...I just want to feel the way I do when I talk about it or think about it or hopefully someday see it...I just wish everyone wasnt so scared of what others think...

[fun4Ds 1,098]

I am a novice to swinging, but am most anxious to get started. My first question is this...are couples open to married males or does swinging always involve couples only or single males with couples?

I suppose the question is....

 

Will your wife be ok with you playing alone?

 

Seems like there is more to what you are asking

 

My second question concerns bi-sexuality. Do women get turned on watching other men suck their husband's/parnter's cock? I am most interested in performing oral sex on a male, but find few bi-curious men at the Swingers Board.

For the most part.. No its not a big turn on for most.

 

How can I convince my desires without sounding like I am a flamer or blatant homosexual? I simply want to taste and swallow a man's load of cum.[/

Place an ad on sls and state what your desires are. Be honest, and be yourself. Whats wrong with that?

[arvcpl 16]

Everyone else has been pretty kind and politically correct, I'm going to come out and say it, a cheating, bisexual male trying to come into the mainstream swinging community to try and suck some dick is going to pretty much be a pariah. Your best bet is probably park restrooms, allys outside porno theaters, gloryholes inside adult video stores and other places typical for guys looking on the down-low.

[bicuriouscme 16]

First of all, I NEVER knew his wife didn't know so implying that I wanted to hurt a marraige is not ok with me...I was just voicing my opinion about MY situation which is what i thought this board was about. Again I NEVER wanted to make anything ok with a cheating husband.

[herpob 563]

Greetings!

 

I am a novice to swinging, but am most anxious to get started. My first question is this...are couples open to married males or does swinging always involve couples only or single males with couples?

 

My second question concerns bi-sexuality. Do women get turned on watching other men suck their husband's/parnter's cock? I am most interested in performing oral sex on a male, but find few bi-curious men at the Swingers Board.

 

How can I convince my desires without sounding like I am a flamer or blatant homosexual? I simply want to taste and swallow a man's load of cum.

 

 

First question answer: We want couples 100% of the time, as others have stated looks like a cheating homosexual husband. If everyone met and the wife was fully consenting you might find some couples here and there but my guess is you have not breached this subject with her, and if you did she would say no, be very offended, or grossed out! I'd test her out with questionnaires, role play, some pictures or video, very carefully.

 

Second question answer: For most females NO! Especially wives. Out of our 8 females only 2 are "into" that. For me as a female who is totally into guys, penises, and cum, and sex with guys it would not bother me, guys cocks are HOT! I definitely do not want to see my husband go flaming for cock but things do happen during group sex... For years my husband has encouraged me to let the wives of the men I have sex with do stuff with me. We have been mainly MfM with some group and orgy, on occasion things happen here and there and in the heat of the moment I am fine with it. When you have your face buried under someone you have no idea what all is taking place on your body some times or who is doing what. I have watched my man cum in a lady, be underneath eating her in 69, then her husband mounting her doggy, all with Puss, Cum, & Cock right in his face and touching him, dripping on him. I've seen men pull out cum shooting it everywhere all over her and him, I've seen them shoot cum in their wives pull out afterwards and their cock flop on his face. I've sucked men clean afterwards right over his face, kissed him in between, pussy juice, cum, and cock all over. In the heat of the moment things happen, it's cool, no one wants to damper the mood. I have kissed him with cum from other men, he has eaten me and other women out after other men have shot cum all in them. I have never pulled a penis out of a lady and fed it to him but in the throngs of sucking guys over his face I have kissed him with a cock right there. It was pretty hot! As far as him going down on his knees and sucking a guy off - naaaah to weird, sorry not manly. Him wanting a guy to cum in his mouth, naaaaa same reason. Eating it out of a lady is one thing, me kissing him with a mouthful is the same. Now a couple of the guys in our group are bisexual and they have both helped me suck other men off in our group in a few of the orgies, it was fine no different than anyone joining in as far I am concerned. I have also sucked guys in 69 and watched another guy mount him over me; I have to admit that was pretty hot to watch from that vantage point. I like watching people get f***ed (I know that is crude but that is what happens when I get hot some times). I watched gay porn while in a normal mood to see if it was hot but NO it was not. I watched bisex and again NO! The live stuff that just happens is always the best and most arousing I guess because I am in the heat of things. I did recently mention in a post getting my husband to try some new things but it is mainly because I am one of those what is good for the goose should be good for the gander as well. Example - the first guy (and so many many more) that wanted me to suck his penis and let him cum in my mouth I said sure I'll do whatever you want as long as you do it first. Of course most guys can't suck themselves off but I can sure make them shoot into their own mouths. That is how I became so addicted to cocks and cum. Young horney guys will do anything for sex and I put them through the ringer having loads of fun.

 

Third comment you made: The above last several sentences brings me to your last comment. I assume you are talking about telling your wife about your interests. To convey your desires without sounding like a flamer or blatant homosexual try the reverse of what I did. Does she like you to go down on her? What about after you cum in her? Does she let you kiss her afterwards? Does she let you cum in her mouth? Does she like to kiss you afterwards? These are usually some of our BEST kisses. Try to work your way into cum swapping, find what she loves and treat her royally adding in a bit of kink that you like here and there. I like to jerk my husband off while kissing him and feed cum during our kissing. He likes to do the same with my juices. Try role playing - she might be a queen, you might be a slave, set it up so she forces you to do stuff you normally wouldn't, she might get into it depending on how it is approached. We have done some things that we would not have done other wise in our role play simply because it was in the script or scenerio. I’ve used toys on my man (torture), had him do it (forced), etc. Last example - I have had my husband jack off into his own mouth for me in the slave role play and we kissed like mad afterwards. He didn't get grossed out nor did I view him differently. My advice for you is - where there is a will there is a way. Take your time think it through from all angles, you DO NOT want to gross her out or have her look at you in a negative way, so be VERY careful. And DON'T screw around on her!!!

 

Hope it helps

[carl01tx 17]

I am a novice to swinging, but am most anxious to get started. My first question is this...are couples open to married males or does swinging always involve couples only or single males with couples?

 

We have had MFM encounters with single males and we know a couple that we have had same room full swaps with. We and the other couple are straight but due to schedules we have a hard time getting together. She doesn't mind her husband getting together with us for MFM's and we enjoy it. When all four of us do meet up, we enjoy discussions of our past MFM encounters. We haven't experienced a bit of jealously, so are there exceptions?

 

We are not really qualified to comment on the bisexuality part of this thread except to say that we believe a man is cheating if he doesn't tell his partner about an encounter with another. If he is in a devoted relationship there could be drama attached.

[Lascivious L&L 866]

I am a married man, I'm bi, and my wife and I have a wonderful time with men who aren't afraid of their sexuality. I'm fortunate that she is aroused by man on man sex and can't help joining in. Kissing after a blow job, licking her while she's being fucked, going down on her when she's filled with cum, yes! All wonderful, hot actions. The heat of the moment can truly inspire!

 

If you're afraid of your own cum, if you won't kiss your wife after she's given you a blow job, then aren't you letting fear keep you from some very intimate pleasures. After all it's your own cum!

 

I can understand not wanting to taste another man's cum. But if your wife does, if she blows another man and he cums in her mouth, would you really fear kissing her immediately? It's so hot! Same with going down on her after she's been fucked by another man. She's warmed up and in the mood, how could you say no to lighting that fuse??? Seize those hot, intimate moments.

[SecretAsianMan 348]

It'll be different strokes for different folks ... MOST couples want to play with another couple - but there are plenty of folks who're open to playing with single people as well. (Nothing wrong with it, but there's definately a bit of a "stigma" versus single guys ... there have been too many instances where rude, crude and bad behavior by single guys have turned folks away from wanting to play with another single-guy)

 

Basically, take your time & establish yourself in your local community - be honest with people (including your partner / wife / etc) and don't do anything behind their back. (Establishing that your partner has given you permission to "play" without her is always going to be a bit tricky)

 

As far as bisexuality goes... sadly, MOST of the groups I've encountered are very one-sided when it comes to bisexuality. Women are thoroughly encouraged to explore & express their bisexuality. Men, however are NOT. (Sure, there are exceptions to this - but they're rare)

 

MOST bisexual men (in a couple) will sell themselves publically as "straight" because of the stigma attached to it...

 

I do hope you find what you're looking for & y'all (as a couple) can explore & express yourselves in your adventures together. Good luck to y'all

[jessicat78 23]

"Are couples open to married males or does swinging always involve couples only or single males with couples?"

It depends on the couple really. Jess and I will swing with married men as long as the wife knows and approves of it.

 

"Do women get turned on watching other men suck their husband's/partner's cock?"

Again, it depends. Jess gets VERY turned on watching the men play!

 

"How can I convince my desires without sounding like I am a flamer or blatant homosexual? I simply want to taste and swallow a man's load of cum."

Honesty is the best policy here. Let he know about your desires and see what happens.

 

Hope this helps

[Pussylicker4u 51]

I agree with Lascivious L&L April 2010 post. I too am a married bi male and my wife does know I am bi as she has known that since we first met almost 4yrs ago. We sometimes play with single men, women as well as couples. My wife doesn't mind if I go down on a guy and sometimes she will just watch as I play with one alone. Don't get me wrong I'm far from gay as I love eating pussy way way too much hence the username Pussylicker4u. I find it just fun to endulge in both men and women as it can be an extremely hot time especially if the other couple has a bi male as well. We don't require the other person or couple to be bi as we do respect that not everyone is into but like other posts say things do happen in the heat of the moment so what the heck might as well have fun. My other view point on bi sexuality is that you only live once so you might as well have fun living life to its fullest so who cares if a person is bi or not. I think that there are too many contradictions to bisexuality as it is anyway. Think about it a woman can be bisexual and no one thinks twice but when a guy says he is he is automatically pegged as being a queer. Now I find that a double standard as bisexuality is the same across the board regardless if your male or female. A true bisexual is that way as they have a love for sex and the human body regardless of wheter they are male or female.

[gsu22 187]

A true bisexual is that way as they have a love for sex and the human body regardless of wheter they are male or female.

 

Very true....I've come to realize this as I explored MM activity more and more. I still LOVE women the most but having an appreciation for a hot male body never hurt either

[Bulletproof 5]

I’m recently married and my wife enjoys sex and exploring and so do I. We are both fit and athletic built so we tend to attract very easily people. We have never explored swinging even though she wants to be with a women. She’s very shy about it but fears it could effect our marriage. She also loves to play with my ass and has bought a dildo and a strap. I’m not into that at all actually but I let her do it and she loves it. Being a Alfa make it felt weird but it was ok as I’m open to exploration. 
 

She has voiced fantasies of have a bi couple to play with us including the guy wanting to play with me and vice versa with her. I’m not bi but curious as like with her. It’s strange to feel that I would be interested in that but wanted to know if other couples have tried it even men and what was the outcome.

 

We are both opened about our sexuality but have never pushed past our bedroom to seek it out or what to expect 

[Aphroditee 323]

ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY!  I would watch my man sucking dick all day long!  Freaking love it!  I wish more guys were more fluid too.  

[JessicaJamison 861]

Oh yeah babe, that shit is fire!  Do it.  Send me the video!  

[herpob 563]

On 3/27/2022 at 10:01 AM, Bulletproof said:

I’m recently married and my wife enjoys sex and exploring and so do I. We are both fit and athletic built so we tend to attract very easily people. We have never explored swinging even though she wants to be with a women. She’s very shy about it but fears it could effect our marriage. She also loves to play with my ass and has bought a dildo and a strap. I’m not into that at all actually but I let her do it and she loves it. Being a Alfa make it felt weird but it was ok as I’m open to exploration. 
 

She has voiced fantasies of have a bi couple to play with us including the guy wanting to play with me and vice versa with her. I’m not bi but curious as like with her. It’s strange to feel that I would be interested in that but wanted to know if other couples have tried it even men and what was the outcome.

 

We are both opened about our sexuality but have never pushed past our bedroom to seek it out or what to expect 

Being an Alpha doesn't mean it doesn't feel good. You sound like my husband. Anal play is part of the natural course of things, its down there where everything is happening so of course it's going to get included whether planned or not. Back in the day when we used to get hot and heavy things happened and anal happened. We touch, we grab, fingers slip here and there in the heat of the moment and so forth. Now it is a very planned part of our sex. Over the years and the many many many orgasms I have had from anal along with vaginal, my husband began to realize anal is amazing (to receive) and could as amazing for him. The more he let me play the more open he became and soon the man was having orgasms as large as me and multi (something he had never experienced). 

 

We didn’t open our marriage up till much later and then only to people who understood we were only doing it for things we could not provide for each other alone, hence the reason for groups. One male doesn’t provide enough by himself, he needs friends.  As I have mentioned in prior posts: I cannot get enough cum from one man, I enjoy it that much; I cannot get multiple holes filled with real live bareback cum filled cream puff stuffed penises with only one man; and I have no way to cum fill or cream fill my man’s holes without other men.  So I needed to find a way to get men.

 

For my husband, the comfort level was not there for males only to join us so I found couples. With couples I had to give as much as we got of course. I wasn’t expecting to do all that I do with the wives, but to not be a taker I made myself available for them. You do what you need to do to keep the group smooth.

 

My husband who has no interest in men or really other women does have such a strong interest in my desires and connecting with me in any manner possible eventually gave in. For years we had done him anally and he knows how amazing that is so he would come to the group sex parties and watch. It took a while for him to try a few things here and there like cum kissing with me after I’d sucked one of the men off, then more, then cum swapped. Then I was asked to eat some of the wives’ cream pies, he helped.

 

As we played watching others he was always rock hard, leaking all over and never flinched if someone touched him a little bit. The first time one of the husband’s did me doggy, he sat staring into my eyes as the man came inside me. It was the oddest sensation for us both. That was my first face sit on him. Then another man took me over him, and another, cum and penises are all over his face. So much has happened I get some of the timelines confused now but we were in a similar position with me sitting on his face cum leaking, a send or third penis in me over him, and one of the husband’s stepped in between his legs. I guided him into my husband. There is so much to tell but it is a very long tale.

 

To the point I want to make with you, as per my husband & myself, nothing you can simulate or do is the same as taking a real bareback cream filled cock in your mouth or other holes. Nothing feels the same as it, looks the same, or provides as great of an aftermath picture. The orgasms from it are so intense it is hard to crave it daily and hourly. Since all of this, he has F ed me, all of the other ladies, vaginally, orally, and anally. He has sucked every guy off hundreds of times, been F ed by them as many times anally, and been cum in as many. So from our little meager interest things have expanded as do all things sexual for us. When with others, we still primarily focus on the main things we cannot do as a lone couple. For example, my husband can get all the anal he ever needs doing me so he does not do the other ladies anally often and he has never done a guy. He has no reason to and doesn’t want too.

 

As far as being an Alpha, some men feel they are Alphas and only do others but if you are not into doing it with men why would you? My husband is not into guy’s butts. I however AM! My man is now perfectly content with letting the guys have at him. He’s a receiver and from what I can tell a pretty good one. My husband receives it from toys, machines, me, strap ons, the other ladies, and men and he feels no less than he ever did. He is very manly. Receiving is extremely pleasurable and he knows how much it does for me to be there watching up close, playing, touching, encouraging. There is something so amazing to be right there as his wife seeing and feeling him getting rummaged unloading penis after another and telling him all the while, you can do it, you can take it, you love doing this for me, you are so amazing at taking c***, I love you, I love that you do this for me, I love watching you get F ed in your …

 

It does take a lot of patience and time to get to this point in relationships. Take it slow and play at home, RP a lot, use toys, machines, simulate it all in a variety of scenarios. Even that will be awkward at times. A few weeks ago I was pleading for my husband to take a giant black c*** while I was dping one of our sex machines. I was screaming how much I knew he wanted big black cocks and their cum inside him. He was like, “No I don’t.” Awkward…  And yes he has done that and enjoyed them. He wasn’t as turned on as me yet, he’d just gotten out of the shower.

 

I can tell you from my experience and from watching all the couples we have been with, the one who flourish and are the most exciting are the ones who play together, in the same room, stay together or as close as possible, try to watch, talk, and encourage each other as much as possible, kiss a lot, hold hands a lot, hug, and love on another often. It is so cool to watch a wife getting ravaged by several people while the husband is by her side getting done likewise and they are hold hands, glancing over at each other. So many times I see couples stretched out touching as they are doing what they are doing. Since your wife is interested in females I highly recommend joining her. I love it when anyone and my husband are dual doing me and I would much rather have my husband right there sucking and tonguing with me as I tend to the wives. I love sharing with him. That is why we got into this in the first place, not to have sex with others, but to share having sex with others, to share the experiences. We have an unbelievable  connection and relate more on a deeper level now. I now get why my husband loves eating p***y so much but it is still so much better together. He agrees.

 

 

Edited April 12, 2022 by herpob

[AndrewandAnn 360]

Bi-sexual males are considered higher-risk by the medical community. For that reason, we have limited our play to heterosexual couples only.

 

According to the CDC, roughly 70% of all new HIV cases are among bi-sexual and homosexual males, referred to as "men who have sex with other men". In 2019, of the the 34,800 estimated new HIV infections reported, 24,500 of them appeared in bi-sexual and homosexual males. This is to say nothing of all the other STDs/STIs that can result from unprotected sex. Those considering engaging in unprotected sex with other bi-sexual or homosexual men may want to consider this before they press launch.

 

Good luck and stay healthy. You only live once, so don't fritter it away on a moment of unbridled passion.

 

 

[NerdsAreFun 226]

1 hour ago, AndrewandAnn said:

Bi-sexual males are considered higher-risk by the medical community. For that reason, we have limited our play to heterosexual couples only.

 

According to the CDC, roughly 70% of all new HIV cases are among bi-sexual and homosexual males, referred to as "men who have sex with other men". In 2019, of the the 34,800 estimated new HIV infections reported, 24,500 of them appeared in bi-sexual and homosexual males. This is to say nothing of all the other STDs/STIs that can result from unprotected sex. Those considering engaging in unprotected sex with other bi-sexual or homosexual men may want to consider this before they press launch.

 

Good luck and stay healthy. You only live once, so don't fritter it away on a moment of unbridled passion.

 

 

Swingers are right up there with gay men in such studies.  If you're engaging in unprotected sex with relative strangers, get on Prep and regularly test.  The test and prep messaging has reached the gay/bi community.  Swingers not so much.  Best to presume everyone you play with is bi and plays unprotected.  There are a whole lot of "straight" men in the lifestyle who will engage in bi play if someone else brings it up first.

 

 

Disease Risk Higher for Swingers Than Prostitutes

 

High rates of sexually transmitted infections among older swingers

 

Aging Swingers at High STD Risk

Edited April 12, 2022 by NerdsAreFun

[AndrewandAnn 360]

12 hours ago, NerdsAreFun said:

Swingers are right up there with gay men in such studies.  If you're engaging in unprotected sex with relative strangers, get on Prep and regularly test.  The test and prep messaging has reached the gay/bi community.  Swingers not so much.  Best to presume everyone you play with is bi and plays unprotected.  There are a whole lot of "straight" men in the lifestyle who will engage in bi play if someone else brings it up first.

 

 

Disease Risk Higher for Swingers Than Prostitutes

 

High rates of sexually transmitted infections among older swingers

 

Aging Swingers at High STD Risk

Interesting links. 

 

Unfortunately, the study reported is quite flawed and the conclusions are dubious. Here's why:

 

Firstly, it defines swingers as "straight couples who regularly swap partners at organized gatherings at clubs and engage in group sex". 

 

That behavior certainly can't be applied to all, or even most, swingers. That definition only applies to a sub-set of the swinging community. Ann and I, for instance, do not go to sex clubs and never have. Likewise, we do not engage in group sex. And we are not outliers. Nobody in our play circle does, either.

 

In reality, there are many sub-sets in the swinging community and our behavioral choices vary greatly from one sub-set to another. Most behavioral scientists recognize substantial distinctions within the Consensual Non-monogamy (CNM) community. The study fails to draw any distinction between, for instance, polyamory, polyfidelity, open marriages, and so on. These are not inconsequential differences.

 

Secondly, the study was severely limited in both size and scope. Geographically, the study was focused on a comparatively tiny area in South Limburg in the Netherlands, comprising six small cities with a combined population of only around 360,000, and was based upon the reports of just three (3) STD/STI clinics. 

 

The sexual habits and medical conditions of a group of Dutch swingers frequenting sex clubs in the area of South Limburg can hardly be applied to the entire global CNM community. 

 

 

[AndrewandAnn 360]

Oh, and I'll add that this small Dutch study's findings are in direct contradiction to a 2015 study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine titled "A comparison of sexual health history and practices among monogamous and consensually non-monogamous partners", that found "... those in CNM (consensually non-monogamous) partnerships were more likely to use condoms with primary partners, more likely to use condoms with extradyadic partners, and more likely to get tested for STIs."

 

The study's conclusion reads as follows: "Thus, although partners in CNM relationships had more sexual partners, the precautions they took did not seem to elevate their rate of STIs above an imperfect implementation of monogamy."

[NerdsAreFun 226]

On 4/13/2022 at 7:18 AM, AndrewandAnn said:

Interesting links. 

 

Unfortunately, the study reported is quite flawed and the conclusions are dubious. Here's why:

 

Firstly, it defines swingers as "straight couples who regularly swap partners at organized gatherings at clubs and engage in group sex". 

 

That behavior certainly can't be applied to all, or even most, swingers. That definition only applies to a sub-set of the swinging community. Ann and I, for instance, do not go to sex clubs and never have. Likewise, we do not engage in group sex. And we are not outliers. Nobody in our play circle does, either.

 

In reality, there are many sub-sets in the swinging community and our behavioral choices vary greatly from one sub-set to another. Most behavioral scientists recognize substantial distinctions within the Consensual Non-monogamy (CNM) community. The study fails to draw any distinction between, for instance, polyamory, polyfidelity, open marriages, and so on. These are not inconsequential differences.

 

Secondly, the study was severely limited in both size and scope. Geographically, the study was focused on a comparatively tiny area in South Limburg in the Netherlands, comprising six small cities with a combined population of only around 360,000, and was based upon the reports of just three (3) STD/STI clinics. 

 

The sexual habits and medical conditions of a group of Dutch swingers frequenting sex clubs in the area of South Limburg can hardly be applied to the entire global CNM community. 

 

 

It's definitely understudied, as those studies themselves say.  But I'm glad you agree there's nuance within a given demographic.

[ConfusedHubby 118]

I think male bisexuality is getting more and more common in swinging and will continue to present opportunities when people let their guards down with people they've gotten to know and just do what feels good.

 

At a recent event I was engaged in a threesome with a couple my wife and I had played with several times with no MM contact.  This session, the other male half took a few opportunities to stroke me, guide me into his wife, encourage me to cum in her for the two of them to share, rub my balls a bit, etc.  Though it was a turn on, I didn't reciprocate as our female half has been discouraging of M/M contact, but it was interesting having this couple I've know getting this open, in a *very* hetero norm LS party hosted in a club that doesn't even allow SMs.  

 

Since my first experience, I've had a lot more indicators of interest from guys and wonder if I, myself, put off a certain 'open vibe' more so than times changing... hmm?