sweet_tna 680 Posted July 31, 2008 I can honestly say I'd rather being doing than watching. Part of that is because women are typically not as visually stimulated as men. The other part is that I prefer to pay attention to my partner and what we're doing. That doesn't mean I don't give the occasional glance over to see how he's doing, or that it doesn't turn me on when I do see he and his partner having fun. But would I be happy sitting back and just watching all the time? No way! This is a team sport, so you and the wife need to find a way to play that will make both of you happy. =) Quote Share this post Link to post
sexcupid 809 Posted August 1, 2008 On the other hand, my wife said she doesn't feel the same way I do or other girls do about watching. She doesn't like watching me or thinking of me having fun with other girls or without her. She is only happy when we are together and she is included and having fun too. I get disappointed with the thought of her not being able to watch or think of me having fun. I actually have no desire to play with anyone if she is not ok with it. I know she thinks I'm hot and we are in love and into each other. Do other girls feel the same way? Does it change? Do you really like watching your man? Are we on different levels? Is it just the difference between men and woman? Should I worry? It makes you happy and fills you with some kind of joy knowing that she is having a good time no matter what she does. I mean, if you are wanting your wife to be thrilled at the prospect of going out with a group of other women...it may never happen. Girls night out can be world's away from being out on the prowl. If it makes you happy that she is with her friends because it makes her happy/relaxed that's great. The thing is, we are all different. You can't expect your partner to have the exact same response to a situation that you do. Do I like to watch my sweetie have sex with someone else? Not particuarly. Does that make me any less of a swinger? I don't think so. I want to know he's having a good time, but I also want to focus on my good time...I'm not much of a voyeur, I'm more of an exhibitionist and like to know that people are potentially watching us/me. Perhaps your wife is the same way. You are now over the hurdle that kept you from playing in the beginning and can participate. Do you think that if your wife wasn't ok with a potential play partner that you would be playing with that person? I'm not sure what your guidelines are, but many have a 'veto' provision on play partners. Some women absolutely LOVE to watch their partners with someone else...some of us don't. Have you asked her why? Is she anxious if you go for a guys night out? I have just accepted that we all have preferences, comfort levels and things that turn us on. Quote Share this post Link to post
Guest MrsVan Posted August 1, 2008 Well I have to say that I love to watch MrVan. I would love to find a single woman whom we can bring home to play with but watch MrVan have a good time with her. We had a couple that we played with when we first got started and MrVan participated in a MFM with that couple and I went and watched. It was a great time and I enjoy watching MrVan with another woman. I find it to be a big turn on.. I know MrVan feels the same with me and loves to watch me with other men as well. MrsVan Quote Share this post Link to post
herpob 559 Posted August 1, 2008 My man has always loved to watch me, do whatever, self, toys, dolls, machines, men, etc. That was the way it was in for quite a while though he did participate in the mfms and multiple men. Eventually when he had his first lady I was absolute floored. Best porn I ever saw and still see. I learn sooooo much from watching him f*** other women. I know females are stereotyped as not being as visual but I am here to proudly say, “I AM!” I can watch porn and it does nothing most of the time, I can read erotica and can turned on as heck, I can watch my man having his way with another wife and GO APE! As for your wife – find visuals that do arouse her and reenact them to get her juices flowing. One of my favorites involves the character “The Highlander.” If that doesn’t work, I don’t know what would. Sound like she needs to build her visual skills, maybe try some serious erotica. Find what makes her wet and build your self into the story. Work at it and don’t give up. Occasionally it takes time to get people to evolve - Quote Share this post Link to post
ktimephoenix 156 Posted August 1, 2008 Mrs P. loves to watch!!! last weekend i "caught" her playing with herself while watching me and another woman. Quote Share this post Link to post
mrfunfan 25 Posted August 1, 2008 Thank you all for the response. I am really trying to determine if any girls didn't like watching at the beginning and then after the shock factor wears off of seeing your man could have fun with someone else you begin to enjoy seeing him in action and feel more secure. As for me, at the beginning, I did not care to watch only because I felt left out. Now it's just like watching porn but my hot wife is in it and the star! Seeing her from different angles is hot! We do role play at home and use different names and we get really turned on..but it's because she is involved and not watching me with another girl. My best experience was a 3some that happened one time by chance and I have been asked to play separately by girls and couples....but because my wife doesn't like the thought of me having fun without her, separate rooms and a HP is not an option for me. I'm ok with my wife having fun and get turned on thinking about it. However, if my wife tells me she doesn't like watching me have fun...I worry about it and it can be a performance problem for me. Quote Share this post Link to post
J & K 16 Posted August 10, 2008 My wife also don't get turned on by me having fun, but if she is par-taking in that fun with another lady she is turned on because she is part of my fun. We still haven't had our first threesum, but she enjoys turning me on by telling me that another lady is pleasing me when we do it alone by ourselves in bed or she is giving me a handjob. Some ladies enjoy seeing their partner while others don't and want seperate rooms to play. We all have our likes/dislikes indeed. Quote Share this post Link to post
lustylearning 705 Posted August 10, 2008 There is a connection I have with my wife that makes me happy when she is happy. Sexually or not..even if she just goes out for drinks without me for a girls night out...I will picture her having a good time and it makes me feel so good inside. On the other hand, my wife said she doesn't feel the same way I do or other girls do about watching. She doesn't like watching me or thinking of me having fun with other girls or without her. She is only happy when we are together and she is included and having fun too. I get disappointed with the thought of her not being able to watch or think of me having fun. I actually have no desire to play with anyone if she is not ok with it. I know she thinks I'm hot and we are in love and into each other. Do other girls feel the same way? Does it change? Do you really like watching your man? Are we on different levels? Is it just the difference between men and woman? Should I worry? I am similar to sweet tna. I focus on my play partner, though I'll occasionally do a quick check of my husband to make sure he's having a good time as well. I have suspected sometimes that when my partner is doing the "check up" of their own spouse, it may be more of what you describe - getting turned by the visual. It doesn't bother me if it makes my partner happy. Everyone having fun is what's important. Quote Share this post Link to post
LFM2 1,482 Posted August 11, 2008 Well I have to say that I love to watch MrVan. I would love to find a single woman whom we can bring home to play with but watch MrVan have a good time with her. We had a couple that we played with when we first got started and MrVan participated in a MFM with that couple and I went and watched. It was a great time and I enjoy watching MrVan with another woman. I find it to be a big turn on.. I know MrVan feels the same with me and loves to watch me with other men as well. MrsVan I have to ditto this. I love watching Dave. I love it when he's having a good time. It makes me happy to see him happy. Quote Share this post Link to post
Brian and Jo 344 Posted August 19, 2008 I love to watch Brian while he is playing. I have always liked to watch him with another woman while they play together especially when they are fucking. Brian discovered his bisexual side a few years ago and I get really turned on watching him with another man. I could'nt believe how exciting it could be to see Brian with a cock in his mouth never mind about when he is getting fucked! Quote Share this post Link to post
awesomecplmn 21 Posted August 19, 2008 Love watching hubby pleasure another woman. It is a huge turn on! But I've always loved it, so I can't help with the question of changing one's mind after not liking to watch. Unfortunately, it may just be that some women don't like to watch. Quote Share this post Link to post
shy_tn_gal 15 Posted August 23, 2008 I have not yet watched hubby ... as, to date, he has been watching me... but I am looking forward to watching him with great anticipation. I have been hot for weeks just thinking about it..... Quote Share this post Link to post
quivers4me 49 Posted August 23, 2008 I have a single male play partner and I can't wait for the opportunity to watch him with another woman. While we don't have the *emotional* connection that most married/committed couples have we are great friends out of the bedroom too. We are going to a LS party tonight as a couple and hopefully will get to play with another couple after the party. Quote Share this post Link to post
thegirl 22 Posted August 24, 2008 I don't get off on watching my husband, at all. I love knowing he is having a good time... I love having a good time myself, but to actually watch what he is doing is not fun for me. One of the hottest things about separate room stuff is being able to 'hear' him. I love that. It also depends on the situation, though... we have had 2 threesomes with single girls and were lucky enough to have been allowed to take pictures... and that was fantastic for me. I got some excellent pictures of the action. I did much prefer the threesome with the bi girl more, though... I loved being able to participate and loved kissing her while theboy was having sex with her... When we had a threesome with a straight girl, I felt awkward at times. If I hadn't had the ability to photograph the evening... I don't know that I would have had anywhere near as much fun as I did. Quote Share this post Link to post
ourrockstarlife 15 Posted August 25, 2008 DJ and I do not play apart, so we are always together. Do I "get off" just from watching him with another woman? Not particularly. I do love to see him from a different perspective when he's in action. Not so much the fact that he is "fucking" someone else, just to see him doing what he does so well. Makes me proud, you could say I touch base often, catch his eyes, or tangle my arm up with his if we are close together. I think that connection is important. However, it does turn me on when I am working him over with another female riding shotgun. Just his reaction is enough to make me hot. Quote Share this post Link to post
sexyNYCswingers 15 Posted August 25, 2008 I Love Watching My Sexy Black Man, with other women. Its a major turn on to me, 2 C him with other women. He's giving them the same pleasure I get all the time, with my sexy Italian self. How does that song go, "It Ain't No fun, if my sisters can't have none, it ain't know fun!" Sexy NYC Bi-Racial Swinger Couple (^_^_^) Quote Share this post Link to post
couplers 4,588 Posted November 23, 2008 The thought of hubby enjoying another woman drives me lustfully crazy; actually seeing him penetrate her and then cum is almost unbearable. It makes me want to fuck, whether it's hubby or another man, I just need it. Hubby on the other hand seems to enjoy watching, but it doesn't put him in a frenzy as it does me. Quote Share this post Link to post
JustAskJulie 2,595 Posted November 23, 2008 I can honestly say I'd rather being doing than watching. Part of that is because women are typically not as visually stimulated as men. The other part is that I prefer to pay attention to my partner and what we're doing. That doesn't mean I don't give the occasional glance over to see how he's doing, or that it doesn't turn me on when I do see he and his partner having fun. But would I be happy sitting back and just watching all the time? No way! This is a team sport, so you and the wife need to find a way to play that will make both of you happy. =) to all of the above. Quote Share this post Link to post
Tracey2 103 Posted November 25, 2008 I'll chime in and say that I absolutely love to see him with another woman. It is such a turn on. We've haven't had much experience yet, but the first time I saw him with someone else (after over 16 years with only me) I couldn't believe how sexy it was. Quote Share this post Link to post
Tia Vampire 167 Posted November 25, 2008 At first I did not like watching my man, but now it is a real turn on. We make an awsome team. Quote Share this post Link to post
mrmass 15 Posted November 25, 2008 Mrs Mass, loves watching me for a while with another lady, then she likes to join in. Quote Share this post Link to post
joelana 26 Posted December 17, 2008 Wow, love to watch him for sure it is a real turn on for me, the only thing that I hate it to think of him alone playing with another female, and am NOT there. Quote Share this post Link to post
KinkyNeighbors 15 Posted January 12, 2009 My husband and I always play together and while I really enjoy being involved in the action, I also like to take a momentary pause during play to watch because I can see my husband's enjoyment from a perspective that I don't normally get to see. To sit opposite him on the bed while he's getting a blow job from a lady friend and I masturbate to his excitement is hot to me. Plus we get to make that eye connection at a distance which gets me real excited. I have to confess, though, I wasn't always good with watching. In my earlier years, I wasn't totally comfortable not always being involved, but I grew and changed from my experiences and now watching is pretty cool. Ann Quote Share this post Link to post