How old were you on your first couples swing experience?

[bbarnsworth 2,636]

12 hours ago, couplers said:

Was there also an element of wanting your wife to have the same experience that you did?  After two years of us being an MFM unit, I wanted see my husband with other women. 

 

Not at all.

 

My wife had made it very clear well before we were married that she had absolutely zero interest in swinging or polyamory in any shape or form. She wasn't angry with me that I had dipped my toes into this. She just didn't want to do it herself. She felt it was wrong, and even though I pointed out that the couple's vows had changed, she still felt it was wrong. I didn't pursue it. At all. I was quite happy being monogamous with her. The thought of participating in non-monogamy again hadn't crossed my mind.

 

So, seven years into being married one night she mentions that it would be fun to have two men massaging her at once. She looooves massage! This started a discussion that lasted many months. After eight months, we finally dipped our toes in the pool. For me, it wasn't that I wanted her to have the same experience. It was that this was a wonderful adventure we were embarking upon together. It's been a great ride!

[cplnluv1 863]

True couples experience 40 though I was much younger when I had group sex as a single 

[couplers 4,577]

11 hours ago, bbarnsworth said:

one night she mentions that it would be fun to have two men massaging her at once.

Did she specifically mention two men and not two people?  That was the clue?

 

11 hours ago, bbarnsworth said:

After eight months, we finally dipped our toes in the pool.

Do tell.  Did it start with a massage, or did the eight months of discussion already take her past that step?  So for seven years the planted seed was growing...

[bbarnsworth 2,636]

4 minutes ago, couplers said:

Did she specifically mention two men and not two people?  That was the clue?

 

Do tell.  Did it start with a massage, or did the eight months of discussion already take her past that step?  So for seven years the planted seed was growing...

Two men, yes. :)

 

The first dip into the pool took us past that step, yes. Our very first venture was just meeting another couple in the lifestyle. Nothing happened, it was just a conversation as we had lots of questions and they were happy to talk. The second dip was to a swingers club.

[hunterdonNJcpl 1,369]

13 hours ago, bbarnsworth said:

So, seven years into being married one night she mentions that it would be fun to have two men massaging her at once. 

My wife also enjoys that.

Q: how did you go about finding a second masseur (assuming the first one was you).

[bbarnsworth 2,636]

12 hours ago, hunterdonNJcpl said:

My wife also enjoys that.

Q: how did you go about finding a second masseur (assuming the first one was you).

 

We didn't target finding a second masseur per se. We both understood that while swapping with couples was likely to happen, or real target early on was MFMs, which would naturally result in massage from myself and the other man at the same time. Over the years, we've had far more MFMs than couples. That's worked great for us; I "suffer" (hardly) from compersion, and absolutely love my wife having sex with other men.

[couplers 4,577]

11 hours ago, bbarnsworth said:

absolutely love my wife having sex with other men.

Reading about all the men here who "love" their wives having sex with other men causes me to wonder if it is the same for women knowing and watching their husbands with other women.

 

It seems not, at least for me.  For men it seems to be porn, watching other people, in this case their wife, engaging in sex.  And although I get that, for me it is more psychological, the deep feelings it causes in me, everything from joy to extreme hurt (to which I look forward) to excitement.

 

Can any other wives comment? 

[bbarnsworth 2,636]

My wife takes no pleasure (or displeasure) from watching me having sex with other women. It just doesn't do anything for her. She's happy that I'm having a good time and enjoying playing with another woman, but outside of that it doesn't do anything for her.

 

It's not porn for me to watch my wife enjoying sex with another man. The reaction I have to porn is completely different than the reaction I have to my wife wrapped up with another man. Ok yes, I've described it before as getting to watch the best porn movie ever, starring your wife. But, it really isn't.

[Numex 2,379]

For Daniela and me, just knowing or seeing and participating in our spouse having sex with someone else is both superficial sexual pleasure and something much deeper. As many people have said here, it intensifies our love and brings us closer together. Even when one of us just goes out for some alone play with one of our partners in our closed group of married couples.

[hunterdonNJcpl 1,369]

On 3/2/2024 at 9:52 PM, bbarnsworth said:

 

We didn't target finding a second masseur per se... MFMs would naturally result in massage from myself and the other man at the same time.

Gotcha. The first time i got my wife a 4-hand, undraped massage at home (many years ago) she wanted a real masseur!

 

If you post online that you're seeking a qualified masseur to sensually massage your wife then suddenly everyone is a qualified masseur.

 

So I contacted the local Massage Envy, told them my wife wanted me to set up a massage for her with a strong man who does "deep tissue massage" and they gave me a list of all their masseurs and I had to contact them separately to explain what we wanted.

 

Some were insulted. Others sent me nudes. She was very happy with the one I finally selected.

Edited March 4 by hunterdonNJcpl

[PJ&Lin 188]

College then we married and stopped. Now in or 30s we started a year and ago. 

[David Lovell 160]

On 2/27/2024 at 2:22 PM, David Lovell said:

I was 41 and my SO was 39 (now 48 and 46).   My first partner was 32 and her SO 34. Almost eight years once still swing with them. 

Recently we have started swinging with a couple quite a bit younger than we are. Clare is 33 and Pete 35.    

 

 

Soon we will be left with just our first swinging  partners, Ken and Lesley, they are a bout ten years younger than we are. Our friends Claire and Pete also younger thanwe are,, are  moving back to Wisconsin.

We have old friends 500  miles away and we ocassionally swing together. Tbdy are the same age as we are.

My wife Amy enjoys sex with Ken , possibly because he has more energy than I have.  

 

 

 

[couplers 4,577]

On 3/26/2024 at 12:28 PM, PJ&Lin said:

College then we married and stopped.

You two were in the lifestyle together in college?  Or separately and didn't meet until afterwards? 

[Rock n Tits 182]

24

[Anon321 521]

We were in the 18-25 range.  I don't remember the exact age but I would say she was 21 and I was 23.  We had a lot of wild times!

[PJ&Lin 188]

On 3/30/2024 at 8:56 AM, couplers said:

You two were in the lifestyle together in college?  Or separately and didn't meet until afterwards? 

Before marriage we had fun with others as a couple. Linda had a girlfriend that joined us often alone and at times with a date. 
We stopped after marrying for a number of reasons. 

[Numex 2,379]

On 4/3/2024 at 8:12 AM, PJ&Lin said:

Linda had a girlfriend that joined us often alone and at times with a date. 

I was good that you knew each other well in that regard before you got married. It must have made the post marriage lifestyle discussion much more comfortable than most.