How often do you swing?

[Bambi 15]

How many times a month do you guys swing? Does anyone swing without their partner? If so, does the other partner know this?

[danc694u 19]

Originally posted by Bambi:

How many times a month you guys swing?

 

We generally try to make one "social" every other month. Rather than doing it on a monthly basis. $$$$$ It adds up after you get a hotel room...liquor...door fee. We are however, hoping to cut the middle man out, and find 1 or 2 couples to play with regularly, at home Then we'll consider a more active schedule

 

Does anyone swing without their partner.

 

No, never alone.

[Stratecpl 19]

Bambi,

 

We get together with "friends" as often as we can and still not interfere with family, school, work, or gym. Sometimes, it's only once or twice a month, but then it might be several times a week. In the winter, we get lots of snow here so we might not get to play with guests for two months at a stretch!! Therefore, play while the sun shines....

 

As for parties and clubs, we try to do the club like once a month. It usually costs us about $200 for one night at the club, counting drinks, room, etc.... Entertaining here at home is a lot more fun, relaxing, and cheaper too!

 

We swing as a team, because we enjoy watching each other in action and also getting it on together. It's love that gets you into swinging and that same love gets the two of you together in the heat of a swinging get-together, too. The others are excited by this too.... LOL

[pelagic argosy 18]

My wife hits the bars with her friends about twice a week, and hooks up about ninety percent of the time. She will bring them home for me to watch, or will go home with them. Usually only with one guy, but will let his friends join in if they want.

 

We hit the swingclubs infrequently, we have a good bit of negative feelings towards clubs. Usually five, six times per year.

 

I have access to her girlfriends whom she parties with.

 

Also, my wife and her party friends have an arrangement with a local fraternity where the guys throw a private party for them about every other month. Basically, it's four women in their mid thirties with about fifty college men for an agreed upon period of time-anywhere from twelve hours to an entire weekend.

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

Originally posted by Bambi:

How many times a month you guys swing? Does anyone swing without their partner? If so does the other partner know this?

 

First I want to address your last question. If someone is swinging without their partner and their partner doesn't know... they aren't swinging they are cheating.

 

Now for my personal answers in regards to the questions. We swing on average of 1-2 times a month. I say on average because some months it's more and some months it's less. We do swing solo and anytime we swing alone the other knows about it, if not beforehand they hear all the details after the fact.

[Bambi 15]

Is swinging alone like an open marriage?

[Flori_DAMAN 26]

I have always considered an "open marraige" to be one in which there are very few or no sexual restrictions concerning monogamy. Open marriages would allow either partner to have sex with whomever they wish whenever they wish.

 

Swinging on the other hand in my opinion is the mutual enjoyment of sex with both partners enjoying the sex. This usually happens with both partners present but can happen seperately. I would consider a swinging relationship in which either partner can swing alone an open marriage. Thats the way I see it anyhow, John

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

I think an "open marriage" is still a type of swinging. You still enjoy fulfilling your fantasies with other partners. If they are completely seperate then I guess my hubby and I are swingers with an open marriage. I guess tho that if a couple only has the option to have sex with whoever they like and never does it together nor is tellign each other an issue... that could be an "open marriage" without it being considered a swinging relationship.

 

Basically, an "open marriage" in general is the idea that either spouse can have sex whoever they like, whenever they like.

[Alura 2,774]

Only with friends, never in clubs. Alone only on special and pre-discussed instances. (For example, once, during a class reunion, the opportunity presented itself and we gave each other approval to have sex with our respective high-school sweethearts, since neither of us had done it then. What a gas that was!)

 

Not nearly enough! :-)

 

Alura

[BradAndJanet 70]

What's the frequency (Kenneth)? How often do you get together with your favorite partners, or head out to the club for some R&R?

[Roxysbayou 20]

We swing when we can, or at least go to a club, which is not quite once per month. We still have small kids and when we go we prefer to stay overnight, so that doesn't happen as much anymore.

[naughty A 23]

Not as often as we'd like?

 

Our local club is only once a month also.

 

Few times a year - but I'm hoping

[MIbbwcpl 67]

Definitely not as often as we'd like. We've only gotten to a few times a year due to kids and all. Plus, I'm currently 6 mo pregnant and we really don't think it's wise to swing while pregnant...although I'm not opposed to bringing a known female home. :p Just can't be too safe.

[Guest Seymore]

Well...nice to see I'm not the only one who posts here who's never really done any swinging...I feel like an outsider looking in, just curious about different things since my wife and I started talking about it.

 

It would be a good time to say that I think this board is really great. This stuff's not exactly something you can bring up with friends, relatives, and co-workers. I've gotten such a good perspective of what swinging is all about since I started following the threads here...and I really appreciate the effort of the people who make this site happen...Julie especially of course.

[Stephen 15]

We have met a couple who swung almost every day for a few months and then slowed down to about twice a week minimum!

 

Most scene couples tend to do it twice a month - there's a lot of choice for people based in London and thereabouts.

 

In the Midlands of England it is not unheard of for couples to attend a swing club once or twice a week as one would any local bar.

 

My partner has us on a once a month ration! But that can include one weekend of two happenings - couple and club.

 

Most couples do it once a month or once every two months.

[Brit_Pair 62]

We polled in the 'few times a year' bracket (“More!” they cried. “More!”) due to a twin geographical deficiency: a lack of both suitable candidates and suitable clubs in our area. That said, rationing means meetings stay fresh and exciting, and it does help us to preserve a sense of perspective with regards to our alternative activities.

[danc694u 19]

Hard to give an exact answer to that question. We have such hectic schedules. Sometimes we go out monthly. Sometimes, it's months before we go out.

 

On average, about once every 2 months I would have to say. Summer is our slowest period, we have all the kids and it is hard to get away.

[naughty A 23]

As to what night of the week....

 

generally Saturday... just seems to work out that way...

 

although long weekends with a holiday Monday used to be very popular for Sunday house parties.

[TNT 1,155]

It really depends on what is going on in our lives at the moment as to how often we play.

 

There are times when it will be 3-4 months between play dates, although we do make the local social every month.

 

Here lately we have been actually playing about every other weekend.

 

It definitely helps that the youngest is now old enough that we no longer need a baby sitter, makes getting out much easier.

 

Teresa

[ourfunisu 15]

We have yet to find a compatible couple as well. But we would like to play a couple times a month.

[Ashley 22]

It will come as no surprise to the regulars on this board when I say too often for me and not often enough for L....lol.

[Weezie 16]

We swing not every single weekend, but every couple of weeks depending on our schedules. By the time you coordinate the work schedules of 4 people and 2 females monthly visitors, it can sometimes only be a every now and then thing. We sometimes have dry spells where we don't play at all. We typically swing on Saturday nights so no one has to worry about a time limit...although we have entertained on Friday nights as well. We attend a monthly social about 2 hours away (in New Orleans) which makes a nice overnight trip.

[OhioCouple 40]

We have been on hiatus for some time now. Prior though, it averaged about once every month.

[Roxysbayou 20]

Originally posted by Weezie

We attend a monthly social about 2 hours away (in New Orleans)which makes a nice overnight trip.

 

Oooo! Which group? I have attended one, but wasn't really happy with it. But have been invited to another. I find myself leery to go after the first experience.

[MattMann 17]

We last swung over a year ago and the prospects don't look too good for it happening again any time soon.

[thump29 16]

We don't get to swing as much as we would like to because of children and work but we do try at least once a month. We are just getting back into this lifestyle. It was easier when we didn't have children but now that we are back we try to make the time.

[fun_pairTX 26]

We usually swing once or twice a month, we have a group of 5 couples that meets for at least one of these times. We go to an ON premise club once a quarter on the average. Our on premise club is actually pretty reasonable. The donation is $100, but that covers a cold buffet at night, an overnight stay there, and breakfast in the morning. We don't go to off premise clubs at all.

 

We swing together or not at all.

[Roxysbayou 20]

We never swing alone. We aren' tin it for that. And we try to swing at least once ever other month. But with work and kids it hasn't happened that way lately.

[thump29 16]

We usually swing about once a month. We always swing together never seperate and we always discuss everything together. After a recent experience I would caution you about swinging alone. We were together and my husband left the room several times and needless to say it turned out a disaster.

[Tarnished Halo 16]

I don't mean to be a stick in the mud, but y'all are kinda scaring me a bit. We are not swingers yet, still talking about it, but I am not seeing a lot of the relationship enhancement that I thought swinging was about. That is one of my main issues, I don't want swinging to take over our lives, or dominating our relationship with who got to be with who, how many times, and having access to friends. Gads....If I am off base here, I certainly do apologize, I don't want to step on any toes, but this is NOT what I thought it was about, and my uncertainty is growing.

 

I realize that there are many different types of swinging, and swingers, but I thought that we all had (except for bed post notchers, and please....don't let me run into them) the goal of enhancing our love, our sex lives and relationship by sharing something between us involving other people with the person that we love the most. Our life's partner. I don't want my husband to be behaving in this manner (I'd prolly' cold cock him) and I am waaaayyy to conservative to do that to me, him, and our relationship. I am the slowest person, obviously, and really hope that I haven't offended anyone on the board. I don't know that I have a right to my opinion, since we aren't swingers, but things like this make me back up a few steps, I'm not sure I want to have all this "stuff" happen to me or him!

 

Hope someone out there understands and can reassure me that perhaps people have either forgotten what it is like to have the nervous willies over this. If not, well.....I simply don't know

[Roxysbayou 20]

Tarnished, don't let one or two bad experiences ruin it for you. Just be careful about who you swing with and don't be afraid to stick up for yourself should the need arise. You never have to do anything that you don't want to do. The enhancement for us came from the openess with each other. We were suddenly talking about things together that we never did before. If you choose to never swing, just the fact that you were able to discuss such issues openly has enhanced you.

[Roxysbayou 20]

Originally posted by thump29

We usually swing about once a month. We always swing together never seperate and we always discuss everything together. After a recent experience I would caution you about swinging alone. We were together and my husband left the room several times and needless to say it turned out a disaster.

 

This is obvioulsy affecting our new comers negatively. I know that you had a bad experience, but that does not mean that all singles are bad, and it does not mean that all husbands would leave their wife alone, or that we wouldn't defend our own selves if the need should arise. I know of only one other couple that something like this has happened to. If things are not going in a way that you are comfortable with, end it and leave.

 

I don't mean to be harsh, but every experience in the lifestyle is different. I think that you will find that the good out number the bad.

[bimrdcpl 15]

When we first started it was about every other month. That was with the first two couples for the first 3 years. We attended dances or socials what ever you want to call them about once a year. Now with our 3rd couple we are meeting every other weekend. They are more our speed and understand more about kids and all of that. But now with the holidays coming up it is getting tougher to arrange play time.

[hmr 25]

Well, I guess we are the busy ones here. Currently we attend a house party about every 3 weeks (not the one the Mrs had a problem at). We also play with some selected others in between, so it averages about once a week.

 

As far as day, the regular party is on Saturday, but the rest of the times can be any day. Thankfully our kids are now teenagers and can be left alone without babysitters. Makes life a whole lot easier.

[VegasLee 1,486]

We go to a club just about every Saturday night along with going to private home parties about 2 or 3 times a month.

 

Most of the kids are now gone from home, ( one left) so it is time for us to enjoy our lives doing what we want.

 

[bear_n_bunny 43]

We average about once a month, although we may slip in a trip to our favorite off-premise club in between times. We would likely do it a bit more often, but between kids, work and the like, meshing schedules can make it difficult.

 

-- Bear

[da2ofusgb 24]

We get out as much as we can. Even though we have pretty busy schedules with Tam working every other weekend there are still times we can make a house party or club party and still make it to work the next day.......

[OZCPL 15]

It all depends on who you meet and how attracted you are to them. We have only had three full swapping experiences but I think we would have had more if the mrs. found the men more attractive. Where are all the good looking men (part of a couple) in Australia who are into swinging?

[tazzie_n_truck 17]

We swing about once a month, sometimes once ever 2 months. Depends on schedules, and also if we have someone to watch the kids for us or not, and sometimes it is a spur of the moment thing too. The couple we swing the most with lives about an hour away and more than once we have taken the kids to Tazzie's mom's and go surprise them some weekends. But usually we try to make sure everyone's schedules are free and we have no kids so we can all get together. We try to get together with this couple more often even if it's not to swing, because we are good friends with them aside from swinging and we enjoy each others company for parties and dinner or cookouts and camping.

 

[SparkyandAJ 15]

We have our favorite club we go to. We try to go at least once a month, most times we go twice a month. We don't play every time we go, but we have fun socializing with our friends and hanging out! We do play when the situation presents itself, but really don't ever go with the expectation we'll play. We look for friends first....playtime is only a bonus!

[hmr 25]

Have you ever had a busy week? We had our regular 3 week party last saturday. Then we met a new friend on monday. Monday we found out our regular travelling salesman was going to be in town on Tuesday! OK, getting tired now. Oops, Weds on of the folks from the regular party was staying in our town for one more night before going back to NY, another night of fun. Plus, one of thje mrs #1 oral friends was here Friday night. Ok, now, the travelling salesman will be back on Monday again. Whew!! Anybody got some good vitamins? I think we need some!!

[munk33kitt3r 15]

We haven't yet, but want to. It is kinda hard to do it when we are both in different states!

[akamgaxoxo 25]

My hubby and I decided on once or twice a month is probably best for us..due to schedules for all of us, and just regular life events. However it did seem that when looking back at the calendar, in actuality our friend was meeting with us twice a month. Fun Fun!!

[jay m 15]

We try to once a month but sometimes we get to swing 2 or 3 times which is alright with me. We have small children and it gets hard to have time for my wife and the other couple we swing with but we make as much time as possible.

[Vespertine 31]

We used to go out to play every Friday night.

 

But...

 

We've been hit with so many stressors this fall and winter that we're kind of hibernating at the moment.

 

...and it sucks.

[Spoomonkey 421]

We would like to hit the club twice a month and have get togethers with friends in between as the opportunity arises...

 

But, generally, we end up playing once a month - sometimes more (sometimes a LOT more)...

 

Spoomonkey

[Greg & Sheryl 368]

In a typical month, we will plan two or three swinging activities. However, it not uncommon for one or two of those events to get cancelled or postponed. Also, if we go to a swing club or private party, there is no guarantee that we will get the opporunity to play. As much as we would like to play three times a month, it rarely turns out that way!

[OpenVA 15]

Right now it's definitely not as often as we would like... ideally we would like to be something that just happens naturally when the right people are together... Not necessarily so much in the way of planning... But I guess that only happens after you have some steady friends in the lifestyle.

[married_lovers 15]

Once a month. Most of our encounters are pre-arranged, but we almost always meet at or end up at a club. But we've met some great--as well as hot and sexy--people by just going to a club. Those random encounters can sometimes be serendipity. The "meet for dinner" and maybe meet another time hasn't worked as well for us as far as swinging goes. But it is always fun and interesting to meet new people.

[puneswings 15]

After a two year swinging spree, we have been taking a break right now for the past approx 2.5 years, because we just had our 2nd and 3rd daughters (one year apart). We plan to get back next month onwards.