What? I Can't Hear You!!!

[Trace Ekies 186]

We went to a club we frequent last night to see old friends and maybe meet some new.

 

A large part of the "meeting new friends" and "connecting with old friends" has to do with conversation. A conversation regarding something important to you and them or just idle chatter, but either way you have to be able to hear them.

 

As I sit here writing this and trying to not sound whiney my ears are ringing. The volume of the band's equipment, the barker with the microphone who was advertising drink specials and talking about the new Thursday Ladies Night and even the music when the previous two weren't on was way too loud.

 

Earsplitting to be exact...several made comments to me and I wondered how I was going to "chat up" the lovely woman that I'd had my eye on for a while. I made a good attempt but her and I just had to agree to make contact this week and her and her husband and Mrs. Ekies and I could meet for dinner.

 

No real question here, just an observation and complaint...

 

Thanks to those who took the time to read my bitching.

[JustMrJ 178]

This happens quite often when we go to any club, swing or dance. It seems that they turn the music up to compensate for the crowded room, BUT, they always seem to over do it.

 

I've actually gone to management on more than one occasion and expressed my pain. Usually, they say 'What?!'... then I shout louder that the music is just too damn loud and I can't even hear someone screaming in my ear most times.

 

I've gotten to the point that I usually pack ear plugs before we leave. I have had to use them on more than on occasion.

 

My hearing is bad enough in a crowded room from loud music and noises from an earlier time in my life and I don't need it damaged further.

 

I've been temped to get a pocket decibel meter and take it with me to these clubs just to see what the levels are. I suspect they are quite high and probably in the damaging range.

 

This page gives an excellent chart to go by if you happen to get a decibel reading yourself... Decibel (Loudness) Comparison Chart

 

I'm with you Trace Ekies... It's very annoying at the least and damaging at the worst.

[The Fuse 1,012]

Ha ha ha... this is so true.

 

I sometimes think club managers turn up the volume so high because somehow many customers think that if the music is loud, then they must be having a good time. It's loud, so it must be a great party. This goes for both vanilla and swing clubs.

 

I personally like when the volume is loud enough to foster the party atmosphere but not too loud to hear or be heard. I must be in a small minority though, because it's almost always too loud for me when we go out.

[spvcouple 123]

Thank you, thank you, thank you for putting into words what has been OUR major complaint for years!!

 

We do not go out to bars or clubs all that often. When we do, we are with friends (or those we might like to get friendly with...wink, wink) and we want to be able to have a good time. That means enjoying the atmosphere AND enjoying each other. It is all but impossible to converse in most places. You wind up nodding your head to whatever they have said...hoping that they didn't say that they enjoy the affections of barnyard animals.

 

To the bars owners; Turn it down. We like your place, or else we wouldn't be there. We NEVER pick where to go based upon a false perception gathered from how loud the speakers can go.

 

Thanks again Trace Ekies for bringing this up.

[VegasLee 1,486]

As a host, I totally agree here.

 

I warned, threatened, begged and fired DJ's and bands before.

 

Seems I can not get through their heads that they are there for atmosphere, not entertainment.

 

The louder they get, the louder the crowd gets, then they get louder and pretty soon most are yelling and no one can hear. IT SUCKS!

 

I have found it is not just our place though, we run into it when we travel and visit other parties/clubs all the time.

 

Starting telling the hosts about the noise level, over and over and over again and maybe something will be done about it if enough people bitch about it.

[exploringRM 305]

Several of the clubs we go to are loud, but they do have areas that are not in direct line with the music so there are opportunities to talk. And actually I'm on the fence about the music. There's a local M&G we go to, and it really is too loud to talk, but when you have 200+ people groovin to the music and interacting with each other it is a sexy scene!

[fun4Ds 1,098]

I like the music loud, when I'm at a concert.

 

Not quite that loud at a club.

 

You can tell them to turn it down if ya want too, either way, it doesn't matter to me.

 

As far as socializing, we could find a way

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

One of our local swinger groups meets at a vanilla club (they take it over). The last time we went to that particular place they had a live band. We had a great time up until the band started. Then it was just what you said, you couldn't talk to anyone or hear anyone. Everyone was complaining. The host made several attempts to get the band to "turn it down" to no avail. I don't know, but I think they might have given up on the band after that and gone back to the jukebox.

 

We've had a few other times at other clubs where for some reason or the other the music got turned up louder than normal and we couldn't hear the person sitting next to us, but most of the time it's at a decent decibel that is good to dance to but you can still hear. At our favorite on-premise it tends to be a bit louder, but there are at least other places you can go to talk and get away from the music.

[Voyeur_CPL 15]

There are many clubs and even resorts where the establishment/bands/entertainment seem to confuse loud with having a good time. We have been going to a lifestyle resort for the last couple of years and even though the majority of the people there asked for the music to be turned down, it never happened. Most of the people then leave, so establishments, remember it you want to keep the customers happy and get them to spend money, you need to take control of the entertainment, and make them turn it down.

[JustMrJ 178]

Julie,

 

Easy way to control the volume if your swing club takes over a place for vanilla fun.

 

"If it is not turned down, I'm taking my 40+ friends and going elsewhere."

[bbarnsworth 2,652]

We've run into this at our first outing to a swing club. The couple we ended up soft swapping suggested we go to a quieter section of the club. We happily agreed

 

If you have to yell at the person you're touching to be heard, it's too damn loud!

[vanillaknot 99]

At our local swinger club, on the stroke of 9:30pm, they always play Pink's "Let Get This Party Started." Up to that point, the music is a bit more subdued, in the interest of helping folks get through dinner more amiably. After the Playing Of The Pink, it's quite a bit louder for the rest of the night.

 

Fortunately, the layout is such that a bunch of tables are close to the dance floor and the music, but then there is the bar area, and another dining & high-table area behind that. By the time you get 50+ feet away from the dance floor, the music is somewhat dimmed, though not what I'd call muted. We generally migrate back to that quieter area for the remainder of the evening, whenever we're not actually in the rooms or hottub.

[CXXC 435]

JustMrJ said:

Julie,

 

Easy way to control the volume if your swing club takes over a place for vanilla fun.

 

"If it is not turned down, I'm taking my 40+ friends and going elsewhere."

 

Mr. J

That has worked for me in the past. We had a group of 30+ people hit a small club for a going away party. They had a small band playing that thought volume would made up for lack of talent. The head of the party told the manager that the band needed to take it down a few notches. The band didn't do anything about the level.

 

After the head told the manager he had 5 minutes to drop the volume or the 30+ people were leaving (that was about 80% of his business on a Wednesday evening). He spoke to the band again but nothing changed. When a few of us stood, gathered our coats to head to the door, the owner turned off the power to the band's equipment.

 

EVERYONE CHEERED!!!!!

I have never seen a band pack up and leave a bar so quickly before.

[willyoats 324]

A place we used to go had a sign on the front of the DJ's table: "If it's too loud, you 're too old!" We learned to go outside of the dance floor if we wanted a quiet chat.

[BiloxiCouple 695]

A place we used to go had a sign on the front of the DJ's table: "If it's too loud, you 're too old!" We learned to go outside of the dance floor if we wanted a quiet chat.

 

Need to leave them a sign, "I may be too old, but I can take my money elsewhere" then the DJ will be out of a job.

[JustMrJ 178]

Need to leave them a sign, "I may be too old, but I can take my money elsewhere" then the DJ will be out of a job.

 

ABSOLUTELY! Hit them where it hurts! The wallet!

[good times 991]

My pet peeve is people that complain that the music is too loud. Why don't they just leave?

[wpafuncpl 15]

I don't mind the music a little loud. Part of the party. I would just like to be able to get away from it somewhere in a club if you want to talk. We went to one place where it was turned up so loud that the gutters on the outside of the building were vibrating.

 

[dodgechevy 149]

A simple, simple reason on why most clubs have music that is too loud. IN order to sell more drinks. If you are talking you aren't buying drinks. Same reason why they have salty snacks by the bar too.

[SW_PA_Couple 4,026]

A simple, simple reason on why most clubs have music that is too loud. IN order to sell more drinks. If you are talking you aren't buying drinks. Same reason why they have salty snacks by the bar too.

This logic certainly does not apply to the typical swingers' club. Very few sell drinks.

[dodgechevy 149]

This logic certainly does not apply to the typical swingers' club. Very few sell drinks.

 

My theory goes that swing clubs try to be just like regular clubs.

[HappyCpl 89]

Mrs. H and I go to a local club where the PA is BLASTING for much of the night. We've figured out where we can sit and have a decent conversation, and where we can practice our lip-reading skills...

 

I've got hearing loss in both ears (worse on the right, courtesy of a 12 gauge shotgun blast 6 inches from my head) and the huge amount of bass really distorts my hearing. I keep forgetting to bring a pair of cheap foam earplugs with me, as they filter out enough bass to make my hearing work a little bit better.

[Trace Ekies 186]

Mr. Good Times,

 

I perved your SLS page and would find it hard to leave with Mrs. Good Times in attendance...especially if the music was turned down enough so that I could talk to her and see where it leads...

 

It has been our experience that a relationship of some sort needs to develop before the swinging starts and it's hard to get there without some conversation.

 

One of the clubs we attend has seperate rooms thus solving the problem but the other does not. Don't turn it off, just down enough so that we can get to know Mr. and Mrs. Good times:D.

 

Carry on...

 

Trace

[JTcamp05 9]

A place we used to go had a sign on the front of the DJ's table: "If it's too loud, you 're too old!" We learned to go outside of the dance floor if we wanted a quiet chat.

 

I'm not THAT old damit...just want to hear what the lovely lady across from me is saying..lol

[truckerbuddy 127]

I know for me  I'm getting old ) when I find myself in any kind of club.. It can be a pain in the ass to try to talk to any one... for me if I' going to want to talk to someone about the lifestyle and what we/they are in to or want to do.. I find it better to go to a quiet restaurant. ( in the corner ) its easier to talk quietly. I have seen people talking loud then the music just stop.. ooops (what did he/she just say?)

[amid 91]

The National Institute on Deafness and Other Communication Disorders (NIDCD) notes that exposure of just one minute to sounds of 110 decibels or higher can damage your hearing. No more than 15 minutes of unprotected exposure is recommended for noises of 100 decibels, as well as several hours exposure to noises of 90 decibels or higher. Here's the decibel level of some common noises:

 

140 decibels: rock concerts, firecrackers

120 decibels: boom cars, snowmobiles

110 decibels: chain saw

100 decibels: woodshop

90 decibels: lawn mower, motorcycle

80 decibels: city traffic noise

60 decibels: normal conversation

40 de ibels: refrigerator humming

20 decibels: whispered voice

0 decibels: threshold of normal hearing

 

The sounds produced by some frustrated musicians (wannabe Rock Stars) and DJ's are well above the "safe" listening level.. most of them can't understand that they aren't the main course but more the sauce on the meat at one of these clubs. The main course is the socialization! more important than the sounds you can hear are the ones you can't hear. The subsonic booms of an amped up sound system against the tympanic membrane can be devastating. Most of these people although labeling themselves as professionals don't know the first thing about acoustics and balancing a sound system for optimal sound without all the potentially damaging results.

[amid 91]

My two cents about musicians and DJ's... having been in the bar/restaurant/entertainment industry they have been a thorn in my side many times in regard to the volume they chose at which to play. I have pulled the plug on my share!

[SW_PA_Couple 4,026]

JoAnn and I were driving around county roads this morning and saw a small billboard sign advertising a business -- Deadly DJ Service -- with little pictographs of turntables and Klipschorn loud speakers. I had no trouble reading the implications of extreme loudness in the name. I wonder of they hire out for swingers' clubs?

[BiloxiCouple 695]

I had a club owner try to explain his decibel level as a way to keep conversations private. He worked real hard to maintain a certain decibel level with a decibel meter.

[twoforone100 45]

This might be our biggest complaint and reason we prefer the net to meet new couples... we can actually "hear" what they have said. It reminds us of the "puffy pirate shirt" and the low talker... you never know what you are saying yes to.