Why is laughter such a problem?

[NCfuncouple98 367]

Mr NC and I were just reflecting about our experiences over the last (almost) 2 years.

 

IF it's a couples situation, and both men are aroused, not overly drunk, and in the mood, it can be an amazing time all-around!

 

I consider myself to be a fun kinda gal - love to laugh, joke around, and just generally have a good time. But we've noticed that if laughter is involved, sometimes it causes another male partner to either completely lose interest, or become almost angry, to the point they don't want to continue. Literally, twice, I have had men use the phrase "You are laughing at me". No, no way, I am not laughing AT anyone - I am enjoying myself, having a good time, and I tend to laugh, giggle, and enjoy myself.

 

Mr NC knows me well, and after all these years together we laugh at everything. I mean sexual or non-sexual, we just like to enjoy life and laugh.

 

What makes laughter such a turn-off? Seriously, do I have to teach myself to be so serious and not laugh? Isn't sex supposed to be fun?

[redsticktwo4u 84]

Mr NC and I were just reflecting about our experiences over the last (almost) 2 years.

 

IF it's a couples situation, and both men are aroused, not overly drunk, and in the mood, it can be an amazing time all-around!

 

I consider myself to be a fun kinda gal - love to laugh, joke around, and just generally have a good time. But we've noticed that if laughter is involved, sometimes it causes another male partner to either completely lose interest, or become almost angry, to the point they don't want to continue. Literally, twice, I have had men use the phrase "You are laughing at me". No, no way, I am not laughing AT anyone - I am enjoying myself, having a good time, and I tend to laugh, giggle, and enjoy myself.

 

Mr NC knows me well, and after all these years together we laugh at everything. I mean sexual or non-sexual, we just like to enjoy life and laugh.

 

What makes laughter such a turn-off? Seriously, do I have to teach myself to be so serious and not laugh? Isn't sex supposed to be fun?

 

Yes! I don't consider myself an Adonis, so the first tool I have in my belt is an ability to make women laugh, at least some of them. I love it when my partner is laughing...it lets me know I'm on the right track.

[Fundamental Law 2,885]

Somewhere during the transition between childhood and adulthood, we lose the idea of "laughing with" in favor of "laughing at". Parse the comedy of adult stand-ups, and most of the jokes are derisive at their core. Small wonder that the typical adult view of laughter during sex is that someone is being laughed at.

 

Fact is, sex is not only fun but also pretty funny. It's also sticky, sloppy, messy...and pretty wonderful.

 

Laugh on.

[NCfuncouple98 367]

Exactly Fundamental! Things happen, and you are right - it's sticky, sloppy, messy, and why not enjoy it and laugh at those moments and just enjoy it?

[Chicup 41]

Well if they are IN you and you laugh and they lose interest I can understand why they might be worried.

 

If you are talking just regular conversation and they act that way, to hell with them, they got issues. If someone can't laugh at themselves I want no part of them.

[NCfuncouple98 367]

It wasn't at that point. And it wasn't referring to "him" - but laughter, apparently, more than one, has taken personally to mean "I am laughing at you".

[two4youinswva 3,068]

What makes laughter such a turn-off? Seriously, do I have to teach myself to be so serious and not laugh? Isn't sex supposed to be fun?

 

Recreational Sex=Serious Business.

 

Not sure why some folks are turned off by a little laughter. I'm guessing there's a vulnerability issue involved.

I don't mind a little bit of laughter. Just don't laugh and point at the same time.

[NCfuncouple98 367]

Ok, point taken. I would never laugh, and point. at the exact same moment.

 

I mean, come on, I have been with Mr. NC over 14 years and I've held back the laughter and pointing. Why would I start now?

[SW_PA_Couple 4,024]

. . . What makes laughter such a turn-off? Seriously, do I have to teach myself to be so serious and not laugh? Isn't sex supposed to be fun?

This is something that has plagued my wife, JoAnn, right from the start. She very often breaks out in laughter when getting close to her peak level of excitation. And, as you have apparently experienced, this has caused a surprise (negative) reaction with certain men. They back off or slow down and don't seem to want to pick up the pace again until they receive an explanation.

 

This peculiarity, which I must now assume is not so peculiar as I had previously believed, allows me to know in exactly what part of the house she is. I have sometimes even had a reaction from the female partner with whom I happened to be at the time, "Is JoAnn OK?" Surprises some girls too.

 

"Hey, guys. She's not laughing at you. She is simply showing her appreciation for a good time"

 

~Michael

[Alura 2,774]

I don't recall ever having anyone take exception to our laughter, but Laura and I often laughed when climaxing — much like a reaction to being tickled. Added to the sheer delight of sex, it seemed natural to us.

 

I didn't know anyone else did this. Glad to hear we were not alone!

 

Alura

[Chicup 41]

I imagine the lessor endowed club might be pretty quick to react to such a situation. Especially if the other man doesn't have that issue.

[DiscreetDesires 32]

I actually don't think we've ever been faced with this.. at least to my knowledge.

Hubby and I will tend to get playful at times alone with each other and laughing, but not in the midst of the good and juicy times.

Laughter tends to bring my sexual mood down a bit if we are in the zone. Not because I think I'm being laughed at.. but because laughter puts me in a different kind of mood and takes my focus off of the good sexual feelings that I have at that moment, and pretty much have to start from scratch.

So hopefully if that ever hits, I won't be already climbing that hill to a grand orgasm.

 

Nothing wrong with it, but it would do the opposite for me. People vary differently in their sexual play and responses.. so I just say be who you are and enjoy it.. others will feel the same as you do!

[bicuriocpl 90]

Laughing is ok, as long as she doesn't point and laugh.

[Lascivious L&L 866]

My wife if pleased sufficiently and reaches an extreme peak of orgasm may start laughing uncontrollably. Or crying. Or moaning and screaming quite loudly. It is a sign of extreme pleasure, not a run of the mill orgasm. I love that I can get her there. The few who have witnessed it, and the fewer still who have helped in the making have been awed. Tis a powerful moment.

[Swing*8701 887]

If a man cannot laugh as part of pleasure, why would I fuck him ? Susan

[acdg 15]

Hello all,

on one of our encounters the women were sitting (not getting into detail) and for whatever reason looked at each other and broke out in laughter. I did not have any problems and neither did the other guy we had with that couple several outbursts of laughter and really enjoyed ourselves. When all are relaxed and comfortable with the other why not we go to a club to have fun playing can have all sorts of different flavors.

acdg

[Newpants 21]

I've never thought about that before but now that you mention it you have a point and I am one of those people that have gotten irritated and lost focus over people laughing during sex.

 

Don't get me wrong, I am a jokester and I love humor and to laugh and like to keep things lighthearted and fun.

 

I love going out and having fun and joking and laughing and some of the hottest sex has been after going out to comedy clubs or sitting around shooting the shit and laughing and joking.

 

Joking and laughing are fine and positive before the clothes come off but I have lost focus and gotten irritated at times when people were laughing in the middle of sex. In looking back at those incidents the laughter often appeared to be because people were nervous and self-conscious and really not in the mood for sex in the first place.

 

It was more of a distraction and source of irritation than it was for fun and frivolity. I guess when I am in the mood and having sex I see it as a pleasurable, intimate and passionate thing and not a funny thing.

 

I guess I was seeing it as if someone was so nervous and self-conscious that were laughing at everything that was going on then maybe they shouldn't have gotten to that level yet at that time in the first place.

 

Noone loves to laugh and joke more than me and I definately do not think of sex and swinging as some deep serious issue but if someone is just constantly laughing and giggling it is a distraction and annoyance for me after a certain point.

[LFM2 1,482]

I don't recall ever having anyone take exception to our laughter, but Laura and I often laughed when climaxing — much like a reaction to being tickled. Added to the sheer delight of sex, it seemed natural to us.

 

I didn't know anyone else did this. Glad to hear we were not alone!

 

Alura

 

Definitely not alone in this area. I often laugh when I orgasm. Don't ask me why, cuz I don't know why and it's not laughing at anyone, just a laugh or a giggle maybe cuz it just feels so damn good.

 

I love to laugh. I can't think of anything more that relieves stress.

 

Why people think we laugh at them is something I don't understand. There really can't be anything like that in swinging, can there? It could be misunderstood to mean that you're insecure??? We're definitely not insecure about our relationship or swinging. We're just like everyone else, just don't point and laugh.

[SuperJast 83]

Ummm,..

 

F*ck `em if they can`t take a joke,

and Joke `em if they can`t take a F*ck,.....

 

Some egos are really fragile,..wether from bad experiences or feeling the pressure. Thats where having a real connection with your play partner helps things.

 

Don`t take it personal, keep being you !

[lustylearning 705]

I giggle when I'm nervous. It's actually a high compliment to my partner, though the partner I've giggled with the most has asked, "what are you giggling at?" enough for me to know it unnerves him. Can't help it. Thankfully, for me, it eases with familiarity.

[Coupleerotic22 1,419]

Laughter is a great thing. It happens for various reasons, if you are secure in your "manhood" then you should take it for how it's meant, just fun and frolics. If it is because of your "manhood" then just knock her socks of with your performance and move on. Maybe she will think twice about judging too soon.

 

We had a situation that was very funny and my wife and I still laugh about it. We couldn't get a room at our usual hotel (forgot about an event in town and didn't book ahead). So we found another hotel down the road a few miles. All they had were double doubles, which is smaller than we are used to for active playing. My wife and her partner were going at it and just rolled right off the bed. She and I thought it was hilarious. The other couple didn't think so. I think my playmate was upset that it distracted us and I think he was just insecure overall. He clearly had no reason to be, I am average in length and pretty thick, but he was longer. SO it wasn't about that, not sure why he felt strange about it. But we moved on.

 

Recently my wife read somewhere that laughter at the peak of orgasm actually increases the intensity and contractions. So she wanted me to try to make her laugh, I thought ok, I'll give it a try. I have only managed it once, I have not mastered the act of being funny at that particular moment, but if it makes her happy I will try!

 

Aside from the contractions being extra intense (which is great for me too), it keeps her from holding her breath, which she does at peak orgasm. She holds her breath to the point that sometimes it frightens me because she turns so red from holding her breath so long. On a few occasions she has even ended up with some pretty severe headache from it. SO if laughter will help her in that regard I am all for it too.

 

People don't need to take everything so seriously. And certainly don't need to be offended.

[Alura 2,774]

 

Recently my wife read somewhere that laughter at the peak of orgasm actually increases the intensity and contractions. So she wanted me to try to make her laugh, I thought ok, I'll give it a try. I have only managed it once, I have not mastered the act of being funny at that particular moment, but if it makes her happy I will try!

 

Try fitting your mouth around her clit, applying gentle suction, while flicking your tongue across her. When she begins to climax, start laughing yourself, making sure you don't lose contact. (Smiles breed smiles, y'know.) After she is laughing uproariously move forward and enter her.

 

That usually worked with Laura.

 

Alura

[DiscreetDesires 32]

I would think that if you are upfront with a couple beforehand and let them know that you tend to laugh or giggle from sexual enjoyment, then they may not have a problem with it, or think they are being laughed at, if they know about it prior.

[nola40scpl 45]

i've learned to use laughter as a diversionary tactic. being hung like a gopher has it's drawbacks. if i can keep the lady laughing, then by the time she realizes this fact it's too late and then it becomes a pity fuck. so far so good!

 

honestly i love to laugh and make people laugh. laughing to me means you don't take yourself serious. one of my biggest turn ons is a woman who can make me truly laugh and has a great sense of humor. i don't care what you look like, if you can make me laugh, you'll usually find my pants around my ankles before you even have to ask. usually with a partner like that there's even more laughter during sex and that makes it even more fun!

[willyoats 324]

One time my wife was on top of a guy and they were going at it. His GF and I had just finished and we started joking around. He said, "Don't make me laugh or I will lose my erection." I hope it was just the destraction that bothered him. I'd hate to think that a guy can't get a hard-on when he is in the company of others who are being silly.

[MissKay 46]

I am a laugher in all areas of my life, I laugh full and loud whenever I can, so during sex is no different. If there is a funny noise or a loss of balance during sex my boyfriend and I will laugh it off. He actually enjoys the feeling of my laughing when he's inside of me! If we start laughing and we're in that situation sometimes he'll tickle me or bait me into laughing more because he enjoys the sensation so much.

 

Do any other guys experience that? Not that we'll stop, I just see all sorts of female laughter responses and not many from guys.

 

I understand where the 'serious business' people are coming from, some sex is more 'serious' than other sex. But I think if you can't laugh at yourself sometimes you'll get an ulcer or something from the pent up feelings that laughter releases. If sex is super serious business all the time I think I would be intimidated by the experience; laughing just helps so many awkward moments smooth over nicely.

[DiscreetDesires 32]

Ok MissKay.. I agree with you on that.

 

There will be times when hubby and I will get on a roll of laughter in bed because of the funny sounds, and we can easily get back to business afterwards without a problem.

He said that he does enjoy the sensation down below when I laugh. It's like the sensation of me having an orgasm.. or close to it, with the tightening of the muscles very rapidly. I can definitely see his point on that one.

[CXXC 435]

Laughter is one of Mrs. CXXC's favorite things! If she can laugh and have sex, she is in heaven!!!

[xxxboxy 139]

I giggle when I'm nervous. It's actually a high compliment to my partner, though the partner I've giggled with the most has asked, "what are you giggling at?" enough for me to know it unnerves him. Can't help it. Thankfully, for me, it eases with familiarity.

 

I know the feeling. My take is if I can't laugh with you, or if I can't make you laugh at funny stuff then there's very little chance I'll enjoy having sex with you.

 

I can't get by on looks alone so if humor was removed from my arsenal I'd never get laid...

[AskMeOk 148]

This is something that has plagued my wife, JoAnn, right from the start. She very often breaks out in laughter when getting close to her peak level of excitation.....

 

We've played with several couples where the female begins to giggle or laugh when she is near or in orgasm.... in fact Mrs. Ask does this from time to time...

 

I take it as encouragement, not derision..... I can't image this would turn a guy off, anyway.....

 

'Ya learn something new every day..... I hope those guys see this thread and start to smile along with the laughing girl.....

[cplnuswing 4,713]

What makes laughter such a turn-off? Seriously, do I have to teach myself to be so serious and not laugh? Isn't sex supposed to be fun?

 

I don't find genuine laughter a turn-off at all, more of a turn-on really, since it's a positive sign that all is well and everyone for the most part relaxed and having fun. Nervous laughter, laughter resulting from them being distracted or focused on something else than the situation at hand, and of course laughter that is obviously directed at me and not in a good way , yeah, those might get in my head a bit.

[Ozzie+Harriet 84]

I never knew laughter could be a problem. If people are laughing, they are having a good time, which seems to be the entire point. I'd be a lot more concerned if people weren't laughing and having a good time.

[Ozzie+Harriet 84]

Laughing is ok, as long as she doesn't point and laugh.

 

Bah! If she does that, suggest that there are lots more laughs to come if she doesn't just stop there. It's better to laugh at yourself and use it to your advantage than to let it stop you in your tracks.

[couplers 4,646]

I don't laugh or even smile when I'm getting serious about cumming, it's something intense, the same with running or being on the elliptical. On the other hand, I don't mind and actually like when someone laughs at me or even points to my small tits, big lips, skinny ass or whatever. It's a challenge to have a witty riposte.

[M1F2KTJ 473]

YOU know there is nothing to it but THEY don't.

 

I'm not saying that you should hold yourself back but it might be better to save your laughter for someone who knows you better.

 

I have never been in the middle of having sex with someone where they started laughing. If I did I would think that they are disrespecting me. Laughing during sex is as unusual as crying during sex.

 

You are a special person that deserves to have sex with special people. Good luck!