What's the score anyway?

[two4youinswva 3,068]

Over the last couple days, I've read threads where the female half of a couple has enjoyed a swinging experience, and relayed their good fortune to those of us on the board.

 

In at least two of these threads, there has been a response along the lines of "What about your husband? Does he get to do what you did too?"

 

So, I'm wondering: Couples, do any of you keep score? If she gets an MFM, does he have to get an FMF in order to keep it even? If he plays alone one night, does that mean she gets to do the same thing before any other activities can take place? These are general examples, and specific replies to these instances are not expected.

 

I'm just looking for a general "Do you keep score?", and how's that working out for you?

[Learning 160]

I was thinking the same thing!!!! I can't wait until we see some responses rolling in.

[SexyRedmondCpl 128]

We don't keep score at all. We both enjoy all variations of play, so it isn't something that ever even occurred to us to track.

 

Now, I might feel differently if we were playing separately - but mostly out of envy. We all know how much easier it is for a woman to find a willing single partner than it is for a guy. I get the impression I'd be sitting home alone a lot were that the case.

[slevin 1,374]

As long as we're doing something together then score doesn't really matter. I noticed those responses as well; they tend to come from folks here who think that swinging should be between two couples (or 3 couples etc.). Those folks don't get swinging separately or meeting single men/women. Nothing wrong with that approach, just like the other approaches. Sometimes that viewpoint shows through in responses, which is think is fine. It gives us all an alternative perspective to consider.

[VegasLee 1,486]

Over the many, many years we don't tend to play with couples.

 

If we kept score Laura would have to stop playing for the next two or three hundred years for me to catch up.

 

Not going to happen.

 

Nothing to keep score about, if she is happy I am happy and that is all our life is about.

[Coupleerotic22 1,419]

I was trying to think of something clever to say, but the simple answer is no.

 

Why would we, its about having fun.

 

Although, sometimes she will still say something along the lines of me catching up, and doing a FMF, but I don't think she has wrapped her brain around the act that I REALLY enjoy seeing her have fun.

[exploringRM 305]

In general the score goes back and forth. I (male half) tend to get more women than my wife. She is a bit more selective than I, sometimes a bit more shy and she also tends to spend an extended amount of time with a playmate at a party. If we are meeting a couple at a club or a house, the score is generally tied, unless there is some reason one of us did not play (that time of the month, performance issues, etc).

 

We do discuss the disparity at parties on the way home. She does not have any issues with me having more women than she, men.

 

As long as we are both having fun, the score is meaningless.

[bbarnsworth 2,637]

Score? The only 'score' we keep is whether we're happy and having fun. If yes, keep going. If not, stop and evaluate. We haven't hit "not" yet

 

There's absolutely no point in keeping score. If we ran any aspect of our marriage like that it would be a recipe for disaster.

[sexcupid 809]

Well I will be the (sometimes usual) voice of dissent. Yes, to an extent I keep score. Why? Because I can lol

 

Seriously...the score keeping is not an exact science...but serves a reminder of things that I would like to try that aren't exactly a priority to him (like a MFM). While it isn't necessarily a tit for tat sort of thing at this time...he is definitely ahead in the FMF column (in overall experiences as well as experiences we've shared). For some reason it seems he can't quite get the point that I would like him to be involved, just like he seems to like me to be involved, instead of just finding a couple of random guys at a party to have a MFM with. *facepalm*

 

Of course YMMV...but saying 'babe, i'm glad you are enjoying the experiences we've had but it feels like we have focused on your fantasies more than mine for the most part...can we make it more even or redirect focus for a little bit please' can be a good talking point.

[MN Tom 251]

We don't keep score per se, but since we are still rather new, it's not that hard to figure by just memory.

 

We do play separate, and at this point mrs tom is "pickier" and a bit slower to progress to sex than mr tom is (mrs tom likes to meet up with a guy twice, whereas Im a first date f*ck so to say) , so mr tom has had more overall experiences.

 

That can and probably will change quite quickly though, considering how hot mrs tom is and how much easier it is for a gal to find a guy.

 

The main thing for us though is enjoyment of hearing each other's stories. I really enjoy hearing my wife's recollection of her playtimes, either with singles or with the half of a couple. Enough so that I can use that "material" for masturbation. And for her, listening to me recount the evening with another gal is very important for her. She isn't aroused in the same way as I am with it, but she enjoys hearing it. And we both enjoy learning from it, be it a slightly different angle, technique, whatever.

[sweet_tna 680]

Honestly, truly? I have that tendency. And I've noticed that I tend to come out on top. (ahem) A lot of that, I think, is that because I'm a bi-friendly female, I simply have more opportunities that he generally does. Every now and again, I start feeling kinda' guilty about that, so I'll decline opportunities. It's not really fun if I'm the only one havin' fun . . .

[olderyder 15]

No, we never "kept score". When he never got any action in three years, what's the need?

[mtneers 15]

We dont really keep score, but I (mrs Mtneer) would like my hubby to have just as many experiences as I have. Lets say if we have a MFM I am then looking for a female for us to have a FMF....that being said, its very hard to find a female to join so I am the one who comes out on top

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

He got to go play poker this week and I didn't... I'm totally not letting him out of the house again until I get to do something by myself.

 

LOL.

 

Seriously, um no.

[LFM2 1,482]

No score keeping for us. We do love having fun, though. I have a hard enough time keeping track of my schedule. I can't imagine keeping track of who's scored more or less. As long as we're both having fun!!

[lovefest04 698]

Since we find MFM very enjoyable and we have had many more MFM encounters than MFMF, go figure, I'd have to say she's winning.

 

I, do however masturbate a LOT more than her and I usually fantasize about a neighbor mom or recent female business acquaintance, so that sorta counts doesn't it.

 

Therefore, we're all tied up. :blush:Oh there I go into fantasy land again.

 

Seriously, I do masturbate a lot. Wait wait.

 

This is all about pleasure for us, and since we share everything, each encounter is a + in each of our columns.

 

We simply don't keep track at all.

[SW_PA_Couple 4,024]

Score? Somebody is keeping a score?

[want2watch40 20]

What is there to keep score of?

 

We do everything together like some others here. So, every activity is counted for both of us. We are even

[Let's Play 15]

I'm pretty sure we're one of the couples you're mentioning. At this point, I (wife) am the only one playing with anyone else. This started because it is my husband's fantasy to watch me enjoy myself, and also to do mfm with me. At this point, there is not going to be a situation where he is not at least in the room with me so that he can be involved to some extent. He is completely ok if he's not doing anything else, so there's really no score to keep in our situation because he is fully involved as much as he'd like with everything. That's not to say that he wouldn't be happy to start fully swinging at some point if I'm comfortable enough with it, but he's also happy if this is as far as it goes.

[it'sso 198]

I think for most who are in the game for a fairly long period of time, keeping score isn't an issue. I know when we were into it, I never bothered to do it.

However, once it became obvious that I wasn't going to be included in the action, we chose to no longer partake.

[Coupleerotic22 1,419]

What is there to keep score of?

 

I am pretty sure what the OP meant was equivalent interactions.

 

1 MFM = 1 FMF

1 FMMM = 1 MFFF

1 Hall pass/solo = 1 hall pass/solo.

 

Except for the last example above, if there was a MFM then there would be a FMF and vice versa. However, many of us males enjoy MFM as much or more than FMF, so there is really no imbalance, but others might disagree.

 

With the hall pass/solo, I guess it would be possible to have an imbalance, but if everyone is happy with that, it does not matter. Again, if you look back at some of the post you will see that there are the occasional person that has a problem with one person having more opportunities than the other.

 

In fact some post in past have had issues to an even more granular level. Fore example, "my wife performed oral on him, but his wife did not on me." That is truly keeping score!

 

For us it is not about keeping score, if we are both having fun that that is all that matters. In fact we don't even notice if there is a difference in what happens during a given encounter. If the Mrs. gives oral and the other wife doesn't, I am not sure I would even notice, because we are more concerned about the total encounter.

 

Did we have fun, did they have fun? If so then it is all good, no matter what the encounter type or specifics. Now, if one of us did not enjoy the evening, we probably wouldn't play with couple/single again, but we still wouldn't be an issue of keeping score. It's not like I/she are going to say "I did not have fun last time so you need to take one for the team to even the score."

[oldrrob 20]

I guess I may have unknowingly kept score in this sense; we did whatever was in her comfort zone, which over time evolved into mfm and a few special solos for her. I always felt that I was 100% in the pleasure thing, joining, watching or waiting.

 

So my answer would really be no, never found it necessary.

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

Are there couples here who keep score?

[Bth12 15]

I used to keep score but now I am more comfortable with her having fun and making sure she is in a safe situation.

 

Bth12

[angelkin 1,326]

We don't keep score, but when there is a great imbalance in one direction or the other, we try to correct it because we like a variety of situations (FFM, FMF, MFM, MFMF, MFMM, MFMFMFMFMFMFMF, LOL, you get the idea). For example, if we are lucky enough to enjoy a few FFM experiences in a row, we will seek MFM because we crave it. Does that make any sense? It's not like we are even-ing the score, because whatever we do together is pleasurable and fun...but more like balancing the variety.

[funcoupledayton 2,708]

We try not to keep score. I think I may do it a bit. For example, I did not end up full swapping (due to various reasons) for an entire year. I did still play. He had intercourse with many girls during that time. At one point I did get really frustrated and we had an argument about it. It all worked out fine, it was mostly me just needing to vent my annoyance.

 

We don't balance out our threesomes. I like a threesome with 2 girls just as much as he does. Also it has been so incredibly hard to find a guy for a threesome, that I have almost given up. If we did have a regular guy friend along with the couples and girls we like, we probably would balance it out more.

[frontosa415 21]

We do not keep score at all,I seriously think the ladies would win any how, for us it is about enjoying it