How do I get over my (male) jealousy

[doug39 80]

My wife and I have discussed swinging but have yet attempted to try it. My wife really wants to have sex with two guys at the same time ( another guy and myself). We act out this fantasy with dildos, but a few things bother me about really doing it.

I don't know if I can handle my wife "getting another guy off" and I worry that another man might get my wife off better than me.

My wife and I did do a threesome with her female friend 6 months ago and my wife wasn't threatened at all; she thought it was just fun.

What can I do to get over these fears?

I want my wife to fulfill her fantasy.

[naughty_kitten 56]

Talk about your fears with her. That's really the only way. There is no magic fix other than communication. Absolutely do not proceed until you are both comfortable.

[doug39 80]

I have discussed my fears with my wife and she assured me I have nothing to worry about; she just wants to have fun and a sexual adventure.

 

I guess it is just my own insecurities that are bothering me. Our sex life is awesome; we have been together for 17 years ( we are both 48) and the sex is hotter than ever. My wife is hornier now than she has ever been!!

 

I still worry that I won't be able to handle seeing my wife pleasure another man orally or watch him banging my wife. But I love her and want her to get what she wants.

[MN Tom 251]

Not everyone is cut out for this.

 

And if you have discussed it quite a bit, the only true way you will find out is to do it.

 

Keep in mind that whatever happens you still have each other. The other guy is just another guy, he's not married to you. It's just an experience, nothing more.

[doug39 80]

Not everyone is cut out for this.

 

And if you have discussed it quite a bit, the only true way you will find out is to do it.

 

Keep in mind that whatever happens you still have each other. The other guy is just another guy, he's not married to you. It's just an experience, nothing more.

 

Thanks. I guess one of the problems is I am totally over thinking all of this to the point that is has become an obsession.

Part of me wants to do it to make my wife happy but part of me hopes she will scrap the whole idea.

[DigginIt 1,132]

It's okay to have your fears as they are normal but you may never be able be able to swing. Your thinking is completely wrong for swinging...

 

You should WANT each other to have the best possible sexual encounter that can possibly be had.

 

Here is what is important to keep in mind:

 

You will find men that are bigger, longer, more muscular, can make your wife make noises you may have possibly never heard and they will fuck in positions you never have. They may possibly fuck for hours and she may possibly experience multiple orgasms.

 

...BUT she loves you and only you. This is our opinion but swinging allows you to experience those lustful feelings you once shared but have now turned into a deep intimate connection that will never be shared outside of the love you two have.

 

New sex is an adrenaline rush and if you compare it to your own sex life then you are comparing apples to oranges and you are doing you both an injustice.

 

When you had the threesome with another woman...did it affect the way you feel for your wife? If you have a good relationship, good communication then you should assume that it won't affect the way your wife loves you.

 

Just food for thought.

[doug39 80]

Thanks DigginIt that is good advice.

 

The woman we had the threesome with is my wife's best friend of over 20 years and my wife knows her friend and I would never have feelings for each other....she trusts us both completely.

 

I guess I would have to find a man who we could also trust....it is all so complicated.

[bbarnsworth 2,637]

I guess I would have to find a man who we could also trust....it is all so complicated.

 

Well, it seems complicated, but in many ways it really isn't. Whether you spend a ton of time thinking about it, or spend virtually no time thinking about it, a sexual encounter is a sexual encounter. It's as complex as you choose to make it. That said, trying to convince your brain not to make it complex is like herding cats

 

Looking over your posts...there's a theme here that worries me. I see a lot of "I want to do it to make my wife happy" and not so much "I want to do it because I'd enjoy making my wife happy and watching her have sex with another man". If the roles were reversed, and you were a wife doing the posting talking about letting your husband have sex with another woman, most of us would probably be popping major red flags on this one.

 

Nobody should ever be talked into swinging, or do it only because their spouse wants to and it would make the spouse happy. It's a mutual journey. You take it together, you enjoy it together, as a couple.

 

Can you handle watching your wife make another man cum? Who knows. Even you don't know. There was a fellow posting here sometime back that thought he was ready for a swing encounter. Then, after watching his wife have sex with another man, he was experiencing mild classic signs of post traumatic stress disorder. It really messed him up. For most men, watching your wife have sex with another man is a very erotic experience. It's very enjoyable. For me, I enjoy it almost as much as my wife enjoys it. It's something we really both get a kick out of. I've watched her make quite a number of men cum, and it's never bothered me.

 

If anything has bothered me, its that my wife can get so involved in the experience that it can be difficult to connect with her at times. I've learned to appreciate that; it doesn't mean she's ignoring me. It means she's really enjoying herself. If you decide to go ahead with this, you may find a similar situation. Some men have reported that too.

 

DigginIt is absolutely right; the other guy could be the most amazing sex machine ever. Does it matter? In any negative sense, it shouldn't. If my wife were to find such a sex machine (and she's find a couple of good ones), I'd want her to keep going back to him. Afterall, if you're going to swing just to get so-so experiences and avoid getting experiences that might be as good or better than your spouse, then why the hell do it? Why swing for "so-so sex"? New marketing campaign for swinging "Come and swing with us! We promise to give you only mediocre sex or your dignity back!"

 

I don't mean to make fun of you, so please don't take it that way. My point is that wanting your wife to have a great, great time is a good thing, not a bad thing.

 

And so what if he is an amazing sex machine? Do you think your wife is so shallow, so lacking in her depth of love for you that a guy could take her away from you just by giving her a good roll in the hay? I think you know the answer to that She loves you, not him. Every guy my wife has had sex with can't hold a candle to me. Some of the sex has been fantastic. But, it doesn't change her love for me one bit.

 

You don't have to jump into the deep end of the pool with this. You can go slow. Invite a guy for some MFM action, but with only light soft swapping. See how you feel, and go from there.

 

Also, always remember what MN Tom said; not everyone is cut out for this. It's possible your wife is very well suited to swinging and you are not. That's ok. That doesn't make you inadequate in any respect. Don't push yourself well beyond your comfort zone, or you may find it causes you a lot of grief.

[doug39 80]

Thanks bbarnsworth. Your post has really helped me and shown me a different side to this whole thing. I am glad I came here.

[ViSexual 1,008]

I think that if you get to know the guy first, and are really comfortable with him as a buddy, that it might make it better for you. He should be your friend and the two of you pleasing your wife.

[doug39 80]

Well I have come to the conclusion that we will have to really like, trust and respect the couple we choose to swing with and I need to focus on the interaction I will be having with the wife of the guy that is banging my wife!!

[DigginIt 1,132]

A couple other things popped into my mind after reading bbarnsworth's post...

 

Remember not to think of it as something "your wife is doing" because it's something the two of you are doing together. You two should be able to look back on it and talk about what a great time the two of you had.

 

Second, ask yourself honestly if it is really your insecurities that bother you or a deep sense of possessiveness towards your wife. I get the since from a lot of men that it tends to be the second. Insecurities can be overcome, selfishness can't.

 

I really wish you the best on this!

[doug39 80]

You are correct DigginIt, I can be possessive.

 

Even though we are married I have to remember that I don't own her; and if I act that way and don't let her live her life I will lose her.

 

She always trusts me, lets me live my life and supports everything I want to do. I do need to let my insecurities go and let her do the same.

[EnjoyingLife 127]

Your posts and concerns sound a lot like my husband. We've only been swinging for about a year...just soft swinging until this past weekend when we experienced our first full swap.

 

My husband really struggled with it at first. But a few months ago we met a couple that has become really good friends and we are very comfortable with them.

 

The full swap was a big hurdle though. We don't quite know what to name it. Jealous? Possessive? Territorial? Whatever it was he was having a tough time with the idea of taking that one last step. Full swapping was new to all of us and we messed it up in a lot of ways (long story). But now that it is over, his issues seem to be going away. As far as I can tell, no jealousy at all and I think he is even looking forward to the next time we see them.

 

Anyway, it is the couple that made the difference for us. If you decide to proceed, take your time and find the right guy or couple. You could also take baby steps like we did. Just a little bit the first time, a little more the next, etc.

[DigginIt 1,132]

You are correct DigginIt, I can be possessive.

 

Even though we are married I have to remember that I don't own her; and if I act that way and don't let her live her life I will lose her.

 

She always trusts me, lets me live my life and supports everything I want to do. I do need to let my insecurities go and let her do the same.

 

You sound like you have a good head on your shoulders. I think you will do better than you think if you don't let yourself get in your own way.

[weloveeachother 29]

I am really enjoying this thread. Thanks for posting doug39! My wife and I are in the same boat as you, but the other way around. I am ready and she is not. She gets very jealous from seeing me, or even the thought of, with another woman. She has even told me that it is a possessive thing. Easy to identify but not so easy to overcome. I too, would like to see more comments on this.

[doug39 80]

Well I feel that my biggest obstacle is insecurity. The what ifs. What if my wife likes to fuck another guy more than me. What if swinging breaks us up. What if I freak out during it.

On the other hand my wife is very secure. She even told me that she feels no other woman could do for me what she does for me; not only sexually but everything that has to do with our marriage.

[Alura 2,774]

Well I feel that my biggest obstacle is insecurity. The what ifs. What if my wife likes to fuck another guy more than me. What if swinging breaks us up. What if I freak out during it.

On the other hand my wife is very secure. She even told me that she feels no other woman could do for me what she does for me; not only sexually but everything that has to do with our marriage.

 

Your wife is right, and all your fears have merit. If y'all are destined to swing, those will have to be overcome.

[Lascivious L&L 866]

I've been married twice and have had more than a few intense, passionate, and long term relationships. Yes it is possible that your wife will meet a man who fucks better than you, who is more suited to her, who could even love her more than you. The thing is she could meet him at any time, anywhere, not just in swinging. It happens.

 

None of my relationships broke up because of swinging and I've swung with most of them. Relationships and marriages generally break up because there are everyday living issues that strain it to the point of breaking. In other words, you weren't really made for each other and it is better to separate and find a more suitable mate.

 

There is a belief among some swingers that love is proof against your mate falling for another. I don't agree - swinging has little to do with it. Those who don't swing fall for others in life. Those who do swing fall for others in life. Swinging isn't the factor. Except that swinging often helps to strengthen communication, highlight areas of possible improvement that allows you work together toward a finer marriage or relationship. Swinging also can deal with and lessen the "I want to fuck others" tensions that affects almost every marriage.

[doug39 80]

So I have really got to get my wife a man to have this MMF threesome. We have had really hot wild sex 4 out of the last 6 days. At age 48 she is wetter and more kinky then ever. And these sessions lasts for well over an hour; and after I cum she will masturbate for quite some time or until I can go again.

Again we used the dildos last night to act out the fantasy of multiple men fucking my wife and it was off the hook a great time.

I have got to find the right couple to see if reality is even better than fantasy. And if it ain't we will move on and at least say we tried it.

[bbarnsworth 2,637]

I agree with your first line; try for the MFM threesome first. See how that goes. Then later on you can entertain the thought of a couple.

 

It's great that your wife is so intensely turned on by this! It can be a bit overwhelming though, and might be to you. A thought that has occurred to some before is along the lines of wondering why, after so many years of great sex with you, she could be so intensely interested in having sex with another man. Don't sweat it. It's not at all that you're insufficient, inadequate, etc. Not by a long shot.

 

YOU are enabling her to be able to prosper in seeking her sexual maximum. That's a positive thing.

 

Still, the caution as before, go slow and take things easy. It isn't a race.

[Just Passing By 140]

There is a saying : "Even when you have steak at home every night , you can enjoy the occasional pizza " . Your wife / husband/ ect really enjoying a new partner doesn't enherently mean they are "better" or you are lacking , just that is somthing new.

 

You don't have to KNOW in advance that you will enjoy ( whatever) , but you do need to KNOW that even if ( whatever ) turns out to be a flop , the two of you can talk it out , and still be just as strong.

 

Yes selfperceptions matter, and not all of them can be changed. Yes roleplaying , or just talking about (whatever) during sex is a good way testdrive ideas. And fun in its own right.

[Guest sandraandalex]

I have always found that if you look for trouble, you will find it. Also, worry is just another way of praying for the worst.

 

That being said, here's what worked for us: We accepted that things could go really great or perhaps not so great regarding emotions. We simply agreed that no matter what happened, no crime, no foul.

 

The result was we were both happy at how much fun we had. And, in some aspect, the sex we had with new people was better than the sex we had with each other. Now, note that I said,'sex,' not the love. The result was we became even betters lovers to each other.

 

I have begun viewing swinging as going out to a fine restaurant. The food will be different than what I typically make, in some respects may even be better, but overall it is never superior to my best efforts at home.

 

Make sense ? I suggest you try it and be happy for your wife. If you never do it again, no crime, no foul. As many people will tell you, this is not for everyone. Lastly, your wife has the right attitude: It's just supposed to be about having some fun.

[Palladin 36]

Also, worry is just another way of praying for the worst.

 

I write. I love this adage. I have never seen it before. if it is your own...bravo!

[doug39 80]

Again thanks to all for the great posts and differents views.

 

My wife and I had a long discussion about swinging again last night and communication is the key.

 

We then had hot sex again...the 5th time out of 7 days!!

[bbarnsworth 2,637]

Keep talking Even if you go over ground you've already gone over before, sometimes one or both of you will have a different take on it. In fact, this just happened with my wife and I today.

 

Years ago, we rejected a guy who she was potentially interested in because he insisted that my wife would need to be available at least 4-6 times a month or we weren't "real swingers" ™. There were other reasons for rejecting him, but you get the idea. At the time, my wife thought that playing more than once a month would probably be too much. A number of reasons were brought forward, and all made sense at the time.

 

Flash forward a few years. She has a regular single male play partner now. She'd like to have sex with him more than she is right now. So, I asked "Assuming perfect availability, what frequency would you like?" She said, "1-2 times a week". I.e., a complete shift from years earlier.

 

Changes like this can happen in short time spans or long ones. Talking over old ground isn't fruitless. In fact, rather the opposite. Plus, especially with you being new to swinging, talking it out quite a bit really helps.

[SAVANDWIN 266]

I have a hard time with men who have enjoyed the company of another women but aren't comfortable with a wife enjoying another man. It just doesn't make sense to me and sounds terribly selfish. You say your wife trusts YOU and her BEST FRIEND to not develop feelings and you can't or won't give her the same respect?

If a man doesn't respect me enough to give me his complete trust I don't afford him my trust. What's good for one partner has to be equally good for the other for this to work.

Although everyone can have moments of jealousy, fear or insecurity unless you can get over yours only problems lie ahead.

What you're saying is that YOU have more self control, you are capable of handling sex with others, enjoying it without affection or comparison to your spouse while she is not.

Good luck and I hope you think long and hard about the double standard.

 

Mrs Sav

[Coupleerotic22 1,419]

If ifs and buts were candy and nuts, would we all have a Merry Christmas.

 

Doubts and worries are normal, insecurity is common, you will not know how you feel until you are actually in the situation. And unfortunately you have no control over how you will feel, emotions seem to have a life of their own.

 

But what you can control is how you react to those emotions. You both are going into this together, so you own it together. Even if it is the worst experience of your life (and I doubt it will be) you cannot place blame on your wife or be angry if she had a great time. Don't hold any ill will, sulk or be mad at her. If it turns out you hate this whole thing then man up and and own it as a decision you BOTH made and agree not to do it again. That should be simple as you have already been down this path and she was in your shoes.

 

I don't mean that to sound harsh, but you cannot teach or tell people how to control their emotions, we are each different. But you can learn to control your actions. After you have your MFM just talk to your wife and tell her how you feel and where you want to go from there.

 

My guess is that you will be surprised how much seeing her pleasured turns you on and will want to do it again, and again..............and again.

 

But if not, chalk it up to a learning experience and move on with the great relationship it sound like you have. It is like sushi, if you try it and love it, have it again. If you hate it, never order it again, but don't let it effect meals you have in the future.

 

Good luck and have fun!!

[shrevecouple 252]

What you're saying is that YOU have more self control, you are capable of handling sex with others, enjoying it without affection or comparison to your spouse while she is not.

 

Sav for a person who has experienced this it is a very conflicting place to be in. This was/is my issue as well. After our MFM I knew I could have the experience and it not affect my feelings for hubby or make me dwell on other people BUT I still had concerns with him. I honestly don't think it's a trust issue or feelings that I have more self control. I think it boils down to insecurity about my body,my abilities and a low self esteem/image. I think some of us (even though we love and trust our spouses completely and know they aren't going anywhere) have this little nagging voice that says sexually we will become obsolete and that what we have to offer isn't special or wanted as much anymore.

It's kind of hard to explain and very hard to convince yourself that it isn't true even though you know it didn't change how you felt about them.

[doug39 80]

I am not saying that I have more self control than my wife. If you met my wife's friend that we had the FMF threesome with, you might understand.

I have known the friend for 17 years, seen her go through 2 marriages and many boyfriends. This woman is not someone I could ever have a relationship with and my wife knows this.

[SAVANDWIN 266]

I do understand what is being said about your own fears and insecurities. But the fact remains you freely gave yourself to another and enjoyed yourself and now are concerned that your wife might enjoy the same. Perhaps those fears should have been considered before you decided to have sex with another. Since you either didn't think of them or decided to ignore that aspect I am merely suggestion you give a long hard look at yourself and your relationship, including "trust" .Swinging isn't for everyone and that's fine but to be ok with you indulging in your fantasies and your wife not being allowed to based on your insecurities isn't the best situation and very potentially can cause feelings of resentment.

Something to think about.

 

Mrs Sav

[doug39 80]

The FMF threesome that my wife and I had with her friend wasn't planned and not really that enjoyable for me.

 

My wife and this friend used to have sex with just each other like 20 years ago, before my wife and I met. I just found out about it a few years ago. Well one night we all ended up back at the friend's house and my wife and the friend did most of the sex, I watched and then touched them and got some oral - but was very nervous about the aftermath since we never discussed any rules.

My wife then told me to get a rubber and fuck her friend, I did the friend doggie style for a minute then went limp.

I believe that my wife only wanted me to fuck her friend so she can get her MMF fantasy. This way it is hard for me to say no to it since I fooled around with her friend.

[bbarnsworth 2,637]

I believe that my wife only wanted me to fuck her friend so she can get her MMF fantasy. This way it is hard for me to say no to it since I fooled around with her friend.

 

You really believe that? Your wife would hold the FMF over your head so that she could get her MFM? Ummm, major red flags popping up now. If she's really behaving this way, this is coercion, and is NOT a good recipe for success in swinging.

[doug39 80]

I just think that she wanted to prove that she is open to expanding our sexual life to include others and was showing that she trusts me and wants me to do the same.

[Alura 2,774]

I just think that she wanted to prove that she is open to expanding our sexual life to include others and was showing that she trusts me and wants me to do the same.

 

Now that's a much better attitude, Doug! Return the favor.

 

Alura

[doug39 80]

My wife and I have discussed swinging but have yet attempted to try it. My wife really wants to have sex with two guys at the same time ( another guy and myself). We act out this fantasy with dildos, but a few things bother me about really doing it.

I don't know if I can handle my wife "getting another guy off" and I worry that another man might get my wife off better than me.

My wife and I did do a threesome with her female friend 6 months ago and my wife wasn't threatened at all; she thought it was just fun.

What can I do to get over these fears?

I want my wife to fulfill her fantasy.

 

Hello all. Not to beat this dead horse again but last time I posted we sort of gave up on the idea of swinging. Well last night the topic came up again and my wife really wants to do a MMF with me and another guy and her girlfriend knows a single guy that does this with other couples.

 

I am still not sure that I can handle it and worry it could ruin our marriage but I want my wife to be happy and fear not doing it could ruin my marriage.

 

My wife just craves being adored and being the center of attention by other men. I wonder if giving them sex is a wrong way of getting this attention and will not fulfill her cravings and leave her feeling used.

I

So confused - any advice Please??

[weloveeachother 29]

I am still not sure that I can handle it and worry it could ruin our marriage but I want my wife to be happy and fear not doing it could ruin my marriage.?

 

 

This statement just worries the hell out of me Doug. If not swinging could ruin your marriage then I have to say your marriage needs a lot of work.

[Dont.Stop 339]

Let me adjust something here:

 

We generally call this configuration MFM. And it's all about the F. Two men giving the woman everything she can handle, and hopefully then some.

 

And she'll probably pay more attention to her new toy. That's natural. Having the chance to experience something like this will put her in sexual overdrive. It's going to be a much more intense experience for her than the sex you two are having. Understand that. If you can't deal with that reality then you're doing the wrong thing.

 

If fucking another guy will cause your wife of 17 years to want to leave then it doesn't say much for your marriage unfortunately. Think of all the accomplishments and struggles you two have been through in nearly 20 years. Does a fuck erase all of that? She trusts you enough to talk about it instead of trying to do it behind your back. She red hot thinking about it. You have little to fear but your own self.

 

I've enjoyed a FMF a few times. Wonderful. When the opportunity came up for Mrs to be center stage for a MFM, I initially said no, just have him for yourself and I was going to just wait for them to finish. Then it dawned on me how much I enjoyed the FMF and it was wrong to deny her the MFM. And it was hot. She had me and her favorite swap partner together. I enjoyed more than I thought I would.

 

We've only been married a paltry 5 years. But we came home together and had more hot sex just replaying the moment. I hope to give her that experience again and again.

 

My wife just craves being adored and being the center of attention by other men. I wonder if giving them sex is a wrong way of getting this attention and will not fulfill her cravings and leave her feeling used.

 

That's just you trying to dream up of a way to justify your negative feelings. Surely you don't think that of your wife.

[two4youinswva 3,068]

I am still not sure that I can handle it

If you're not comfortable with it, then don't do it. Most people don't do it, and that's OK.

.....but I want my wife to be happy and fear not doing it could ruin my marriage.

 

If you truly believe this, then you definitely shouldn't be doing it. If she is unable to accept "I love you, but no, I can't do this" as an answer, then your problems as a couple run much deeper than this one issue, and must be addressed.

 

Good luck.

[doug39 80]

the wife and I have come to terms with this whole thing and we are going to go for it.

 

We are going to meet a single guy this weekend and see if we can get a MFM going.

 

I figure if we don't do this that my wife will resent me for not letting her fulfill her fantasy.

And if for some reason she does enjoy sex with other guys so much that she leaves me - well, I guess she probably would have left me eventually anyway.

 

and for the record - we were sober during this discussion.

[lustylearning 705]

And if for some reason she does enjoy sex with other guys so much that she leaves me - well, I guess she probably would have left me eventually anyway.

 

Wise outlook. Bear in mind that by working toward the fantasy fulfillment in this manner, you maintain some control of it.

 

I shared some of this thread with my hubby earlier. He said, "Man, I wish I could just tell him... 'Go for it. Let the chips fall where they may. Rehearse as much mentally as you can beforehand. Use porn that involves similar scenarios with a woman like your wife (without her knowledge). Show no fear. Be confident. Because ultimately, if it's going to fall apart, it won't be because of this.'"

[Hallofrumors 44]

Now, this is coming from a single male, at the moment. Make sure that the two of you are comfortable with what you two are seeking. Find out what she wants when you are looking and discuss what makes you two comfortable. When you do find a guy, make sure he understands your wishes or it might end in a bad experience. But, just like everyone said, take it easy and go with the flow. I'm sure it will be a lot of fun!

[doug39 80]

the wife and I have come to terms with this whole thing and we are going to go for it.

 

We are going to meet a single guy this weekend and see if we can get a MFM going.

 

I figure if we don't do this that my wife will resent me for not letting her fulfill her fantasy.

And if for some reason she does enjoy sex with other guys so much that she leaves me - well, I guess she probably would have left me eventually anyway.

 

and for the record - we were sober during this discussion.

 

 

Well guess what - the MFM never happened. I set it all up to meet the guy and told my wife I would try it. She was excited about it and then suddenly the next day she told me to forget the whole thing.

I don't know if she was bluffing the whole time about swinging or if she realized that fantasy is better than reality. She told me she feared that it could damage our marriage.

I am so confused. These last few months of trying to accept the idea of swinging has been very stressful and it may have been all for nothing. I don't think my wife knows what she wants.

[noobwithboobs 22]

I hope everything works out for you guys regardless of if you swing or not. There is alot of great advice in this thread. I'm gonna have my husband read it later.

[bbarnsworth 2,637]

The idea of swinging can be quite intoxicating. It can really spark intense fantasies, and really turn up the heat in the bedroom.

 

Then when the fantasy starts to become a reality, it can become terrifying.

 

Don't be frustrated with your wife. Life is a journey.

[Coupleerotic22 1,419]

Perhaps she just changed her mind, perhaps she is getting a vibe from you that makes her want to pass on a MFM so as not to do damage to her marriage.

 

Either way it is probably for the best, as you are clearly not ready for this adventure, even though you took part in the FMF. I still have some issues with that, but to each his own.

 

Good luck.

[doug39 80]

Well last Friday night was a crazy night. The wife and I went out drinking and ended up at a neighborhood bar. My wife was drunk and started hanging all over this married guy that we know.

She kept hugging him, grabbing his ass and telling him how sexy he was. She even grabbed his face and tried to kiss his lips.

The guy was alittle freaked out and kept apologizing to me and asked if I was pissed. He didnt want to get in a fight and he is married and his wife comes to that bar.

The guy finally took off and I managed to get my wife out of there.

 

The next day she didn't remember everything but felt bad about what she did.

 

First she wanted to swing. Then when I trying to set it up she says no. Then this happens; so apparently she wants other men but tells me she doesn't. I wonder what she does when she is out with her single girlfriend who is always looking for a hookup.

 

I don't know what to think anymore.

[Powerglide 235]

I think you guys need couples counseling.

[doug39 80]

I think you guys need couples counseling.

 

Been there. Done that. Didn't do much good.

[Alura 2,774]

Well last Friday night was a crazy night. The wife and I went out drinking and ended up at a neighborhood bar. My wife was drunk and started hanging all over this married guy that we know.

She kept hugging him, grabbing his ass and telling him how sexy he was. She even grabbed his face and tried to kiss his lips.

The guy was alittle freaked out and kept apologizing to me and asked if I was pissed. He didnt want to get in a fight and he is married and his wife comes to that bar.

The guy finally took off and I managed to get my wife out of there.

 

The next day she didn't remember everything but felt bad about what she did.

 

First she wanted to swing. Then when I trying to set it up she says no. Then this happens; so apparently she wants other men but tells me she doesn't. I wonder what she does when she is out with her single girlfriend who is always looking for a hookup.

 

I don't know what to think anymore.

 

Wow! The hassles continue, don't they, Doug? If your wife drinks to a point of not remembering what she does, she needs to talk with her doctor. On the other hand, if she really does remember (which, in my experience, is most likely) ... maybe Alcoholics Anonymous?

 

If you two really want to try out swinging, y'all are going to need to not drink The White Man's Poison Water. Exploring Swinging requires an alert mind and quick reactions. There are pitfalls which y'all need to be able to recognize and avoid adroitly. Sobriety is badly needed. Besides, y'all will have trouble attracting playmates, just like your wife did in the bar. Who wants to fuck a drunk woman? Imagine her in a cowgirl position when she suddenly needs to vomit...

 

The drinking problem is the first thing y'all need to work on.

 

...and consider this: Paris is lovely in all seasons for a single man.

 

Alura