Straight couple tired of being told she is bisexual

[Hedo2forus 15]

We are a straight couple. Have been in the lifestyle for about four years. But there is one thing that is really beginning to piss us off! We are so tired of women telling my wife that she is Bi, she just doesn't know it yet!! Or try it you might like it!. When this happens it really bothers my wife. Thats one issue that we will have to deal with, we understand thats just the way that it is. The other issue is couples being very interested in us, then blowing us off after they find out that my wife isn't Bi. Last weekend we went to a party and met a couple and we all seemed to hit it off right from the start. The lady from the other couple was all over me, she acted like she really liked me, and my wife was interested in him. Things were going hot and heavy till She found out that My wife isn't Bi. We told them this so there would not be any misunderstanding later. She told my wife how do you get things started, my wife told her we just pair off with eack others husbands and we can play in the same bed or sep beds. Anyways after finding out that my wife isn't bi they lost all interest in us. We are so tired of getting the same treatment from so many people who at first think we are a sexy attractive couple and want to play. It's like getting a kick in the balls and it hurts. Any others out there that have gone thru this? Also we think alot of women have Bi on there profile just to please there husbands, because there husbands dont have the confidence to make a move, so they want the women to get things moving.

[rainbowskye 102]

All I can really say is keep looking and you will find a couple who are understanding.

 

I am a bifemale BUT that isn't a prerequisite for our play partners. In my profile I state I am bisexual and f/f play is NOT a requirement. I am straight girl friendly

 

I may not be the typical bi female, but for me I prefer f/f play alone, but am open to FFM, FMF (I enjoy all types of sex ). I know my guy likes to watch, and join in, so if and only if the other female initiates it I will go along with it, or if it is something we have set up prior to.

 

I don't see a need to push it on anyone. I am not the aggressive type.

[StewartP 171]

O yep, we get this a lot. They say stupid things like, "just let my bi wife get to work on your wife, she'll soon find out what she's missing".

 

I often ask they guys if I can spend some time with them, see if I can convert them to bi and when they express revulsion say "see? that's what it's like for her"

 

very often when in chat mode, when I say Fiona is not bi ut's the end of the conversation, sometimes without even any further words, no goodby, thanks, nothing.

[Hedo2forus 15]

Thanks for your replys! I hear ya, One time my wife was told by the husband to give it try she might like it, she responded with, suck my husbands Cock and see if you like it!! Well, he rather allowed that my wife had a good point!

[WeHoos 41]

Good one Hedo, lol. Thankfully my wife did not tell me that.

[MsGoneWild 181]

I get this a lot. I chose "bisexual" on the sites as my sexuality even though I'm not bisexual, I identify as pansexual. Most sites don't even know what that is, let alone have an option for it. I go on to explain in great detail in my profiles so people know what they are getting into. That and I hate getting solicited for FMF threesomes from strangers anyway, so even if I was into the girl, the fact that they treat me like another vagina (instead of a person) is a huge turn off.

 

Stick with it, you'll find couples who understand that F/F play is not the frigging song and dance of swinging. If couples are only interested in that, then you know they aren't good partner choices for you guys anyway. Swinging is a numbers game as far as finding compatibility. Keep looking, don't sweat when people are douches, and keep having a good time.

[angelkin 1,326]

We get this sometimes...I am bi-friendly, but decided to change our profile to straight and give a better explanation in the body of our profile. I have and do enjoy playing with a lady, given I am attracted to her and her mate. However, it's just an appetizer...

 

More often than not, when we are approached by a couple, it's because the couple is attracted to me - but the lady is not necessarily into my husband, it's like he is an afterthought. Obviously, everyone wants to be wanted and it's important for him to see a spark of interest from the female half of a couple before we even consider playing with them.

 

So, we play with few couples because of this. More often we play in threesomes. I've never had anyone try to convince me to be bi.

[Valha 18]

Mrs V. and I talk occasionally about her someday experimenting with girl/girl but right now she is not interested and says she will keep an open mind about it. So while I have made it known to her in past conversations that I would enjoy it, I rarely bring it up or push her.

And yes, we both get peturbed when someone claims they will 'convert' her to bi because they are completely disrespecting her feelings towards the issue. The gall! The biggest crap that has happened lately is we had a couple contact us on Swing Lifestyle (our profile clearly says we are both straight, not just in the stats but we spell it out in the profile, too). Well, this couple contacts us, we go out to dinner with them, seem to all hit it off. Then the following day the husband of the couple is emailing Mrs. V back and forth, now asking to see our nudie/x-rated gallery. Mrs. V tells him she would like to wait for Mr. V to open it up, then asks him I guess you're into meeting again then, huh, tells him we both liked them too. He then emails back and says no, we really are looking for the female half to be bi!! WTF! So.....

1. why did you even contact us in the first place given our Swing Lifestyle profile?

2. why didn't you say at dinner it would be a requirement

3. you douchebag trying to perve our personal galleries when you don't even want to meet again? Man I was pissed. Take your bi wife and leave us alone!

 

Ok, thanks for giving us the opportunity to rant & rave on that one, this topic fit the bill!

 

Well, we've met plenty of couples with a bi female who have insisted that Mrs V. being straight is not a problem for getting together / playing. We've had to pass up some opportunities though, because we didn't trust the other female half to respect that boundary, while the ones we have played with (with bi female) that we felt good about behaved themselves wonderfully. They make some comments about Mrs V's hotness and all that is fun, but they have been luckily very respectful for the most part. Hang in here, there's plenty of couples out there for you, just keep looking and let them know early on what you guys are looking for.

[SW_PA_Couple 4,023]

. . . I've never had anyone try to convince me to be bi.

I was wondering if anyone was going to say this. Our experience matches. Nobody has ever made any kind of attempt to convince either my wife or me.

[rainbowskye 102]

I was wondering if anyone was going to say this. Our experience matches. Nobody has ever made any kind of attempt to convince either my wife or me.

 

I agree. My guy and I play with a couple where the woman is 'curious' and the guy is bi. He has in no way tried anything with my guy. There has been play between she and I, but she initiated it.

 

I also host a meet up group of bi women in my area, and in our discussions on this very topic, it isn't something any of us do. It serves no purpose when there are many bi women out there for us to play with.

 

As a bisexual female (an not just bisexual in the sexual sense) it is hard at times finding acceptance. In most cases Lesbian women don't want anything to do with us and more times than not the bi women we meet are mostly just bi in the sexual sense.

 

I'd much rather spend my time enjoying another woman who wants to have f/f play instead of wasting time trying to get a straight woman to play. Makes no sense to me.

[Hedo2forus 15]

Again thank you for all the great replys! It helps to know that we are not alone with this issue. When we first got into the lifestyle, we were lead to be beleave from SOME couples that girl girl play was a prerequsite to get things started, then the guys join in. We think that so many couples have been mislead to beleave that this is the way that is!! so this is why there are so many couples with Bi posted on there profile. We know there are many women who are Bi, but many just post Bi for this reason. And a lack of confidence from the men in getting things started, We have some great friends where the lady is Bi, they respect our sexual preference. And yes, we will keep looking!!

[StewartP 171]

Many of our friends both partners are bi. We were told of one meet where the ladies had had enough of this cliché of the bi-girls always starting things off with a show and instead insisted that it was the men's turn!

Sot the guys stepped up to the plate and started kissing and balling for the pleasure or their partners!

[rainbowskye 102]

we were lead to be beleave from SOME couples that girl girl play was a prerequsite to get things started, then the guys join in.

 

Really? as I've never heard this before. Even pre-internet at clubs I've never heard that it was a prerequisite, and I've been at this a while.

 

There have even been times where the other woman was bi and we never had any f/f play.

 

I think the main reason women put bi or bi curious on their profiles is because of reasons as stated by Angelkin. They can and do enjoy being with a woman but it isn't the main course of the event, and it isn't necessarily going to happen.

 

If there are women listed as Bi or Bi curious just to get things started, it could be more of encouragement from the male counterpart to do so.

 

But again, I've never once heard this.

 

Before we meet with a couple we talk to both parties and even at a meet-up for drinks we always ask limitations.

 

Perhaps this is something you could do. Ask their limitations and state yours.

 

I am curious if you have an online profile and perhaps it is misleading readers?

[MN Tom 251]

Guessing you are just running into the wrong couples.

 

My wife is straight, and while she's had plenty of people offering bi play to her, we have even more people offering straight play.

 

And at times we get mail from very bi oriented females who say "dont worry, I dont need to play bi, we just want to straight swap with you" too.

 

Everyone's different. Some people prefer to start off activity with female bi play, some people want guys to play tonsil hockey, and everything in between.

[Hedo2forus 15]

Really? as I've never heard this before. Even pre-internet at clubs I've never heard that it was a prerequisite, and I've been at this a while.

 

There have even been times where the other woman was bi and we never had any f/f play.

 

I think the main reason women put bi or bi curious on their profiles is because of reasons as stated by Angelkin. They can and do enjoy being with a woman but it isn't the main course of the event, and it isn't necessarily going to happen.

 

If there are women listed as Bi or Bi curious just to get things started, it could be more of encouragement from the male counterpart to do so.

 

But again, I've never once heard this.

 

Before we meet with a couple we talk to both parties and even at a meet-up for drinks we always ask limitations.

 

Perhaps this is something you could do. Ask their limitations and state yours.

 

I am curious if you have an online profile and perhaps it is misleading readers?

 

We do have a couple of online profiles, hedo2forus2 on AFF, and hedo2forus on Swing Lifestyle, AND hedo2forus on Swingtowns. Perhaps one reason you have never heard this is because you are Bi?

[shrevecouple 252]

We kind of got into this on another thread. We have run across this as well. I have heard things like "Oh my wife thought she was straight too. Give it time and you'll probably change your mind". The bi women around here are quite agressive. Oh I know it's not all of them but a large number are. And yes, the females starting the play is par for the course as well. It's seems it's "how it's done" for the majority in these here parts. LOL

[rainbowskye 102]

We do have a couple of online profiles, hedo2forus2 on AFF, and hedo2forus on Swing Lifestyle, AND hedo2forus on Swingtowns. Perhaps one reason you have never heard this is because you are Bi?

 

Not necessarily

 

I may be bi but I have friends who are straight couples and just asking them about this at our party last night none of them encountered this either.

 

I don't require f/f play. I definitely enjoy it, but being bi to me isn't just about the sexual side of things, so to me, it makes no difference.

[rainbowskye 102]

Food for thought...

 

A common things I've noticed is that some women put bi or bi curious and they kind of are and some women put straight and enjoy f/f play.

 

If people are responding to your ads and still inquiring about f/f play, perhaps a quick, upbeat, friendly sentence to say what you enjoy and don't do.

 

I've not read your profiles this just came to me after thinking for just a bit.

 

Indicate she is Straight and loves to please a man or something to draw them in, while stating your boundaries.

 

Maybe something like what I have listed on our profile may work , it's just a suggestion ....

 

HE: Is Irish and straight, Loves to kiss and give wonderful oral pleasures. He doesn't get his until she gets hers. A real gentleman inside and outside of the bed room. Loves thick women with big breasts and a nice ass.

 

SHE: is half Mexican half Irish and bisexual, though F/F play is not a requirement. She does not force her bisexuality onto other women. She loves to give oral to both men and women.

[UserName123 15]

WOW! And here I thought I was the only straight woman in the world!

 

Seriously though, we hear you. I (female) am, straight. I, being ME, is the only person who MAY or MAY NOT decide to change that. I like the chip, not the dip.

 

When we first got started we always had aggressive couples "telling" me what I wanted and that they could change me to be bisexual. We no longer talk to those couples. We have great friends and hopefully soon to be play mates who have a bi preferance but respect me as a straight girl.

 

I feel that if I tell someone my preferance (being men) and they have some sort of retort about it, they aren't worth our time as a couple because they are already showing me a great disrespect.

 

Hope that all made sense, my eyes are p;laying tricks on me I'm so tired right now .

[StewartP 171]

If this was reddit I would upvote this ^

 

Great comment

[Hedo2forus 15]

WOW! And here I thought I was the only straight woman in the world!

 

Seriously though, we hear you. I (female) am, straight. I, being ME, is the only person who MAY or MAY NOT decide to change that. I like the chip, not the dip.

 

When we first got started we always had aggressive couples "telling" me what I wanted and that they could change me to be bisexual. We no longer talk to those couples. We have great friends and hopefully soon to be play mates who have a bi preferance but respect me as a straight girl.

 

I feel that if I tell someone my preferance (being men) and they have some sort of retort about it, they aren't worth our time as a couple because they are already showing me a great disrespect.

Hope that all made sense, my eyes are p;laying tricks on me I'm so tired right now .

 

It's really nice to know that we are not alone with this delemma. I really think that it needs to be discussed more, and brought out into the open.