BettyAnnMBSC 24 Posted June 19, 2003 I'm 25 and my husband is 40 (41 next month). My step-son is 21. My mom is 55. My dad was much older than my mom, he was 60 when I was born. So, my husband is 15 years younger than my mom and I am 15 years younger than my husband and my oldest step-kid is 4 years younger than me.... :-) Generally, I have no problem swinging with (and generally prefer) men who are 35-45 years old. I don't think I've ever been with a couple as old as my mom -- that'd make them 30 years older than me. An early 40's couple is clearly old enough to have children my age and at least one man did have a daughter older than me. We won't get into the fantasy role playing we did together... I've found that my limits are very flexible indeed when it comes to age. I will often step outside of my turn on age if I'm attracted to the individual or couple. That said, I have more problem with a younger (19-24) couple than with an older couple. It seems that since my oldest step-son is 21, I view 21 as "a kid" -- even though I was married at that age and didn't think that I was a kid at the time. There is that things in common issue when there is an age difference but there are other social difference that can cause a greater gap of things in common than age. It seems to me that the only real commonalities issue in an age gap is the selection of music -- my taste in music seems to really annoy the over-40 crowd. I think that the common ground of sharing sex easily overcomes most differences in age -- so long as some physical attraction remains present. Where I find a greater commonality issue is in socio-economic status or educational differences. It's hard to share experience with a couple when one is living paycheck-to-paycheck and the other thinks a $50 meal out is just another night out. Similarly, we can't really have a good relationship with a couple that feels I don't need no book learnin'... while we contribute tens-of-thousands to the higher education system and they can't understand why we care about the finer points of modern usage of the word slut. Of course, if it's just a f**k then those differences don't matter either. Some would say that "age is just a number" -- certainly there are other issues that are as important, if not more important than, age. But, I can see too that age is a marker that many use. As one who has experienced the age gap first hand -- I'd suggest that we not immediately discount a potential playmate based solely on age; we might miss out on some really wonderful relations. And maybe, you'll find you have more in common than you thought... I'd caution though -- * older guys who are playing with a younger woman may or may not want to play "daddy" -- that game is a real turn-off for my hubby but I have been with a guy who made a really kinky role-play of it. The same goes for women with younger men -- she probably doesn't want to be "mommy". * For the ladies that want to play that game, playing "uncle" or "professor" might be emotionally safer... * Younger folk who are playing with older folk don't necessarily want to play that game either! We younger folk don't want to be talked to like we're kids. We want to be an equal intimate partner. Quote Share this post Link to post
Dani&Drew 15 Posted June 19, 2003 We prefer couples around our age, but we seem to be at the young end of the spectrum anyway. She's less comfortable with older couples than I am, which I think is a shame. There have been a few couples I really enjoyed meeting, that the only objection she has to playing is age. Quote Share this post Link to post
twopeople2 15 Posted June 19, 2003 Do you think gender has an impact? For instance, my husband finds much older women attractive. He also gravitates towards hanging out with couples/friends who are much older than we are. I for one have always had a hangup about getting older and am not too interested in couples too much older than we are. Not sure why......just the way it is! (He's 32 by the way and I'm hitting 30 this year.) Quote Share this post Link to post
fun_pairTX 26 Posted June 19, 2003 We are 49 and 39 and usually play with couples in between our two ages. We did discuss this before we started swinging and pretty much have a harder time with people that are younger that we are than those that are older. Our oldest is 22 and we have had to beg off politely when asked to play by anyone in that age range on several occasions, it would just be too strange. We arbitrarily set our limits at between 30 and 60. It just seems to work for us. Age can play a funny part in a relationship, I am 9 years younger than Mrs Fun's mother and older than 3 of her uncles. But hey it works for us and that is what matters. Quote Share this post Link to post
OhioCouple 40 Posted June 19, 2003 There is a 15 year age difference between my husband and I. My husband is attracted to women of all ages, but I can't find a sexual attraction with those under my age group. (I am 42) I don't really know the reason why, but I prefer older men, I always have. Quote Share this post Link to post
M&B 21 Posted June 19, 2003 Originally posted by OhioCouple ..... I don't really know the reason why, but I prefer older men, I always have. and I cook, too. facelick Quote Share this post Link to post
OhioCouple 40 Posted June 19, 2003 Originally posted by M&B and I cook, too. facelick You crack me up! If we ever get the chance to meet ya....you at least have a big coming...... I don't care if you are only 18! Oh, and don't forget to light the fire.... Quote Share this post Link to post
ciscosv 26 Posted June 19, 2003 We have had zero problems meeting up with couples our age. I am a week or so shy of 26 and my wife is 23. Age is kind of funny to me. If you saw me, you would think I was 18 or so. When we first started out, her limit (which I obliged) was 35. Our parents are in the 40-50 category. I myself have no problems with anybodys age. As time went on, we met a couple that we have come pretty close to. Turns out that the male half is 45+. As I said earlier that this is no big deal to me and now it is not to the wife. Once she/we got to know people, that age number goes out the window. Our age has not scared anyone away as of yet. We have soft swung with another lady that was pretty close to my wifes folks age. Quote Share this post Link to post
M&B 21 Posted June 19, 2003 Originally posted by OhioCouple You crack me up! If we ever get the chance to meet ya....you at least have a big coming...... I don't care if you are only 18! Oh, and don't forget to light the fire.... Oh, Mrs O. That is just plain tacky..... sexy as hell, but, tacky. Actually, next January, I will reach the half century mark. Just last night, I was watching Gretta at the Playboy mansion. They are celebrating Playboy's 50th anniversary. Hugh got bunnies. I'll probably get black balloons. And I will still have to cook. Quote Share this post Link to post
OhioCouple 40 Posted June 19, 2003 Originally posted by M&B Actually, next January, I will reach the half century mark. Woot! Woot! Mr. M&B is in my lust range....AND HE COOKS! facelick Oh, and I am more 'whacky' than 'tacky'..... Quote Share this post Link to post
M&B 21 Posted June 19, 2003 Do you know how many years 50 years is????? FIFTY YEARS! .5 century .05 millennia.... hey, I like that one! LOL! I used to hate hearing people say "Mr. XXXX" to me. I would say "Hey, that's my father!" Now, I AM my father! Hell, growing older ain't so bad. Really, it's kid's stuff. Quote Share this post Link to post
BettyAnnMBSC 24 Posted June 19, 2003 Do you know how many years 50 years is????? five decades 18,250 days 2607.14 weeks 438,000 hours 608 1/3 months 2.5 score "Two Score Years and ten" semicentenial "golden" two score and ten doesn't sound that bad, does it? also late middle English Fifti and Olde English Fiftig wishing you many more happy years to come....... Quote Share this post Link to post
jen 16 Posted June 19, 2003 A persons number doesn't matter. If you see the persons heart. Good hearts can be found in peculiar places. In every age. A birthday only counts the amount of love you have gained from every heartbeat, from every smile, from every experience. IMHO........ Quote Share this post Link to post
St. Augustine 20 Posted June 19, 2003 (Cathy) This is an interesting thread for me. I am 45 and Mike is 34. I have two sons 23 & almost 22. When we were discussing this whole age thing my response to Mike was... no one younger than 30! Especially no one old enough to have been a child of mine lol. It would feel to much like I was molesting my child. I know that the person (whoever they may be) even if they were around my kids ages aren't really my children. It would just be way too weird for me. I also know that I wouldn't feel comfortable or relaxed enough to get any enyoyment out of the experience. It was helpful for me to realize that there are other people here who feel the same way. Thanks Quote Share this post Link to post
M&B 21 Posted June 19, 2003 18,250 days 2607.14 weeks 438,000 hours 608 1/3 months Just don't say room temperature Quote Share this post Link to post
jen 16 Posted June 19, 2003 M&B, When you are sexy, you are sexy. Its from inside you, not from numbers. When you are squeezably adorable, its for your lifetime. For always. Quote Share this post Link to post
BiloxiCouple 695 Posted June 19, 2003 If they treat you right and are fun to be with what is the difference how old they are? Besides, if they are old enough they may have some tricks you may want to find out about!!! Quote Share this post Link to post
JanetAndBrad 15 Posted June 20, 2003 Being new to swinging I'd think I'd like to keep to a few year age range (five to ten years) above and below our ages. Brad is 44 and I'm 45. I think for now at least I would feel more comfortable. I don't have the confidence in myself yet to believe that I can be attractive to couples who are almost young enough to be my own children. Maybe after I get my feet wet in the lifestyle I'll start to feel differently. Quote Share this post Link to post
BiloxiCouple 695 Posted June 20, 2003 Your personal experience is what you need to go by. Besides at my young age of 41 if a beautiful 25 year old or 55 year old hits on me, I am personally gonna go with the flow!! Quote Share this post Link to post
smoothmoves 16 Posted June 22, 2003 We've partied with couples in their 20's, and couples well into their 60's. They're all fun in their own way, and we've found that you can learn new things (or practice some old favorites) with anyone. We've tended to gravitate more towards couples in our age range (she's 45, I'm 53) because of the social similarities, and the shared feelings from growing up in a certain era. But they've all been fun. Besides, when you start to get older, there's more and more couples who are younger. Just our opinion Quote Share this post Link to post
MagicEnigma 16 Posted June 22, 2003 Its not the age it is the experience and maturity I like about older lovers. Always has been. The older men seem to have more control over themselves, their pace, and just how to make things go. Much the same with older women. But then its not an absolute, I've been with a guy in his late 40s that acts like he is trying to be some wild 20 year old, and its a bit silly sometimes. I've been with a couple of women that seem like they are trying to act in a porno movie than get into the act we are engaged in. I have noticed the younger of the crowd I'm with, the early 30s mid 30s range, are more prone to work as a group, hold a leg up, move into three and fivesomes, try the multiple partner at the same time positions. Not certain why. Might just be whom I'm with. Quote Share this post Link to post
sepacouple 15 Posted June 22, 2003 we are are still new to all this and really have not decided what our boundries are but we have come to realize that there are some individuals/couples around our age (late 30's) and younger that look much older and/or we just are not attracted to and we have met some people that are older than us that look/act much younger than they really are. I guess what we are saying is that age is just a number and every situation is different. Quote Share this post Link to post
Vjklander 138 Posted June 22, 2003 We are 46/45 and generally play +/- 10 years, but we have shared pleasures with 18-72. If the desire is there, we will share. J Quote Share this post Link to post
Alura 2,774 Posted June 22, 2003 My father was fifty when I was born. I was 49 when my older son was born, exactly three months short of the 100th anniversary of my father's birth. Having kids later in life seems to be a family tradition. The disadvantage is that one doesn't get to meet his grandchildren. If Mrs. Alura and I were to decide we didn't want to swing with anyone older than my father or younger than our son, we'd have a wide range to choose from, wouldn't we? Mr. Alura Quote Share this post Link to post
Soulfinger508 16 Posted June 24, 2003 My experiences in the swinging scene thus far have been with people older than I. I say been with couples that were in their forties to fifties. I'm 27 years old and as long as they don't make age an issue than I certainly won't. Quote Share this post Link to post