Single Guys, what are you thinking? Don't do these things!

[DigginIt 1,132]

Okay, it's obvious that you are not. Are you aware that Lifetime members of Swing Lifestyle approve profiles and private pictures?

 

This little rant isn't directed at all of you because I'm sure most of you are smarter than this but just in case you're not I would like to offer the following advice on your profiles:

 

Nobody wants to fuck Sasquatch - Before you post your pictures, get some shaving cream and shave your cock. OMG, do you really think that is attractive?

 

Sixteen pictures (part 1) - Sixteen pictures of your cock from different POV views are not going to entice anyone. Are you that impressed with your package? One shot is more than enough to show what you have.

 

Sixteen pictures (part 2) - So now that we have all of those cock pictures...turn the camera around and snap one of your face. duh!

 

Your Name - Cock4Fuck - really, is that the best you could do? My wife has always dreamed of having one of those. I bet the people are just beating down your door with the birdies. You want people to take you serious then put thought into your profile name, superdick, hotstud4you, fuckmaster, is not going to get you very far. PS - sorry I had to disapprove your profiles but we want to read something other than agesrjfolslroeoismojeojromeost

 

Your profile - garbage profiles get the trashcan. Try to use complete sentences but NOT "I'm looking for a filthy slut to bang" Yes, there might be some filthy sluts on the site but try craigslist or aff, it's better suited for your mentality.

 

Okay, I tried to have fun with the above but I'm very serious...that shit is all true.

 

For those that write nice profiles, thanks, for those that fit the above, thank you for making it so easy to spot you so we don't waste our time.

[a_d_xxx 663]

DigginIt - Shhh! Don't tell them! Geez, we're counting on our well written profile and sexy yet tasteful photos as standing out as a beacon of light in the vast morass of sludge.

 

(Only being partially sarcastic )

[StewartP 171]

It is very rare that we look at single men profiles, but certainly, among the couples profiles we see, very often in the description is some wording along the lines of "Single Men, for god's sake don't show us another cock. Try and seduce us with something different"

 

Another thing I don't get, for men and couples, is profiles without pictures. Newbies, maybe, give them time to take a few pics and upload them, but often profiles 2 or 3 years old, no pics... Not even a private album.

 

What's that all about? I don't want to be giving out an email address to receive your pics, or open up an MSN chat to get your pics.

[km34 672]

Oh, DigginIt, I love it when you post something that expresses EXACTLY what I have been thinking. I was approving/disapproving pictures the other day and one guy submitted the SAME photo of his bushy, nasty cock at least 5 times. I finally just signed off of SLS entirely because I was so disgusted. It wasn't just his penis that made me feel this way. It was the fact that it was quite clearly completely ungroomed, the dirty jeans that he only pulled down just enough to get it to pop out, and the messy floor that the poor angle of the photo included.

 

I know there have been other posts about people not thinking (or caring) about the background of their photos, but really... It says a lot about you if you can't take 2 seconds to at least push all the crap on your floor into a pile OUTSIDE of the camera range to take a picture for others to see.

[DigginIt 1,132]

one guy submitted the SAME photo of his bushy, nasty cock at least 5 times.

 

Okay, I think SLS was having an issue the other day because those two pictures wouldn't go away. I saw them too (which is what prompted me to post this). It was so scary. The only way to describe it that did it justice was Sasquatch looking.

 

When my wife screams, it's bad.

 

We look at approving pictures as a crap shoot but with less favorable odds.

 

As far as the background items. I've seen everything from overflowing ash trays which is really attractive, to 10+ bottles of pills on the dressers next to the bong. Some are very funny...some not so much.

 

A_d_xxx sorry I let the cat out of the bag.

 

StewartP, anytime you need a good laugh...they are there waiting for you.

[km34 672]

I just couldn't convince myself it was a system glitch because I did get some other photos (of different people) mixed in there. Hopefully you are right about that, though!

[bbarnsworth 2,637]

My wife and I search out single men from time to time for MFMs. It's quite depressing how many poorly written profiles there are present on Swing Lifestyle. Your profile is your BEST opportunity to put your BEST foot forward. It's your billboard, your chance to entice a couple to want to invite you into their bed. Yet, time and time again we see profiles that...

• Contain all sorts of misspellings
  
• Are for a 50 year old man with tons of leet speak (You're 50? Really?)
  
• Have pictures with literally garbage in the background, or messy rooms
  
• Have two sentences in total...and the second is a repeat of the first
  
• Declare openly he is cheating on his (non-sexual) wife
  
• Include their favorite inexpensive beer in their pictures
  

 

I'm reminded of a movie from 90s where Alica Silverstone's character says "I don't get how guys dress today. I mean, come on, it looks like they just fell out of bed and put on some baggy pants and take their greasy hair - ew - and cover it up with a backwards cap and we're supposed to swoon?"

 

So my wife looks at your profile with some, most, and even sometimes all of the above and she's supposed to go "Oh yeah, I wanna fuck him!"?

 

On the plus side, it makes filtering out the "no way in hell!"s easy.

[LFM2 1,482]

Which is why Dave or I even want to approve/disapprove pictures or profiles anymore. There were just too many nasty things to look at.

[WVaCPLforSluts 15]

Well I didnt know that lifetime members approved pics. Since apparently some of you are doing this. Maybe you can explain to me why some of our pics might have been rejected ? They were being uploaded for prvt pics not public ones. Yes it was a cock pic of my husband. But is this for some reason against the sls rules?

[DigginIt 1,132]

So there are three options for pictures, public, private and gallery.

 

Public and Private are approved directly by SLS and must have an R rating or better. They consider any cock picture X rated and they get rejected. You can put them in the gallery though.

 

Gallery photos are considered personal so anything goes as long as it is legal (meaning no children, animals, etc ) If you have one of these rejected then it was someone who didn't know better.

[Crosswords 92]

Okay, I think Swing Lifestyle was having an issue the other day because those two pictures wouldn't go away. I saw them too (which is what prompted me to post this). It was so scary. The only way to describe it that did it justice was Sasquatch looking.

 

When my wife screams, it's bad.

 

I saw that too! Almost put me off approving pictures. :P

 

Mrs. C.

[SW_PA_Couple 4,024]

. . . don't want to be giving out an email address to receive your pics, or open up an MSN chat to get your pics.

 

With this I concur. Same applies for couples' profiles. Don't ask people to jump through a firery hoop just to see a picture and don't ask for an e-mail address.

[Coupleerotic22 1,419]

I thought it was a given that as guys we rarely are thinking when it comes to things sexual.

 

Or is it just a stereotype that the little head (or in this case the hairier one) does the thinking?