Am I Being Too Picky?
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By TeamCalgary
Hello all.
We have been engaged in the LS since Sept 2019 and have noticed a pattern in our activity; curious whether this mirrors that of many of you.
When we first began, we meet folks usually online, and occasionally in a social setting. Initially, our goal to gain a face to face meeting with the potential couple; a coffee, a drink, whatever. Looking back on it, we likely met with too many couples who were not good fits.
Now, our goal is to ascertain the "fit" earlier in the process, so that we meet fewer couples, but the ones that we do meet are, in theory at least, ideally better fits for us.
Peeling back the onion on this, it appears that we have gotten better at asking some of the dealbreaker questions upfront
(condom use, drug use, PnP, same room, play together, etc) that would help to stratify best fit earlier in the process, long before we ever potentially meet.
Red flags are also coming into play as we are now more aware of what some of these things are and how they influence what works for us, and what doesn't.
For those of you who have extensive experience in the LS, we would welcome your comments in terms of how you ascertain "fit". Is it a process or a particular step; certain questions upfront, etc?
Many thanks.
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By AdamGunn2
It was a fairly typical night at D.J.s Island, an early autumn evening. Mary and I hadn’t set anything up in advance, we’d decided to go almost at the last moment. From the second we entered the door our radar was beaming across the club, searching for a couple that might be searching for what we were also interested in - an enjoyable tryst.
Mary took a few minutes to change into what she called a ‘trolling outfit.’ As I remember, that night it was a black babydoll with a loose bodice, thong, low heels. Many men admired her legs as I checked the forty or so women, many as scantily clad as my wife. None of our regular playmates seemed to be in attendance that evening, but we had our customs, we weren’t concerned. Perhaps an hour and a half later, I sat at a table next to the dance floor, Mary was on her feet, on the parquet, moving her body, seeing if anyone would move in. A slow sequence of men approached her, danced with her. Some would take liberties such as moving their hands under her garment, feeling the small of her back, perhaps place their palm on the roundness of her ass.
I’d seen this many times before, I waited for one of two reactions.
The first was that she’d spin away from the man; it signified she wasn’t interested in what he had to offer.
The second was that she’d get closer, I’d watch her whisper in his ear. I knew the question, “Where’s your wife?” Some of them would shake their heads, they were attending as one of the few single men the club allowed, and when they received Mary’s response, they’d move away - that’s not what we were looking for at the moment.
But the man might indicate where his wife was dancing a few feet away. When this kind of thing happened, Mary would glance to me and give our special signal - she’d put one hand on the back of her head, one on her stomach. When I got the cue, I’d come out, we’d dance as a foursome.
As I approached, a man grasped the elbow of a tall attractive lady who was more modestly dressed, at least for the club. There was no conversation on the dance floor, the heavy volume of music and the thumping of the bass wouldn’t allow for speech. But I could tell the woman was interested in me, the four of us paired off and I often found myself facing this vixen. It was obvious they were as interested in us as I was in them, I could tell by the way Mary was rubbing against the man that she felt the same.
After a couple of songs, Mary led the way off the floor, holding his hand, leading us off into a corner away from the speakers. As we sat, the man said, “I’m Ed, this is my wife, Marilyn.”
Marilyn and I softly shook hands, I believe she raised the hem of her skirt to give me a view of her upper thighs. Ed had no problem seeing Mary’s legs, or where they met - she was sitting so that the babydoll was gathered to her side, leaning forward so her globes were exposed to his view.
“Do you come here often?” Ed asked.
“Every few weeks,” I responded, “you?”
“This is our first time here.” Mary gave him a look that asked for further info. “We’re just starting this,” he admitted.
Marilyn picked it up. “We’ve only had one time with a couple of friends. We liked it, heard about this place, decided to see if we could get into more trouble.”
“Trouble’s our middle name,” I joked.
Our conversation continued, where do you live, what movies have you seen lately, etc. It was a screen, of course, we were all calculating if the four of us would be pleasurable bedmates. I paid my attention to Marilyn, my wife had told me numerous times not to worry about her, she can take care of herself. My hand found Marilyn’s knee, she smiled at me, encouraged me to reach a tad higher. We bent towards each other, our mouths met.
Marilyn opened her lips to me, the kiss was ardent, her mouth moist. She licked at my upper lip, her hand fondled the back of my neck. Our tongues clashed, promising cupidity, mimicking what I presumed our bodies might be doing in a few scant moments.
We broke for a moment, Marilyn invited, “Would you guys want to go to one of the rooms?”
I, of course, was all for it, but then I heard Mary. “Uh, not right now. But thanks.”
We’ve always had the guideline that if one person doesn’t want to do something, she speaks for both of us. Regretfully, I pecked at Marilyn’s lips a last time, we stood, went separate ways.
“You’re not upset, are you?” Mary asked me.
“Of course not, not at all. You’re not in the mood?”
“Oh, I’m in the mood all right, just not with Ed.”
“Something wrong with him?” I asked.
“I tried to get him interested,” Mary revealed, “but his kiss was a little cold, indifferent. I put my hand on his leg, he was too busy watching you and Marilyn, he never responded. My guess is that if we went into a room, he’d be watching you two, I’m not even sure he’d get hard for me.” It was a reasonable thought, it had happened to us a couple times before. “Hope you don’t mind, bet she’d have been a firecracker.”
“Maybe. But you’re a firecracker too.”
We headed back to the dance floor, in search of another couple.
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By Spoomonkey
We received a PM today from a single guy. There were a couple of reasons why we weren't compatible, but the biggest reason was probably a little weird.
He stated that he worked at the local video store. Normally, where a guy works isn't the first thing he puts in his PM, but in this case, he did - and to be honest, we rent there all the time...
We'd hate to think that renting would be awkward if we hooked up - or worse, if we didn't. I mean - are we going to suddenly stop getting coupons in the mail? Are the "rent two - get one free" deals going to suddenly cease? Will we ALWAYS get the DVD that has been dog chewed and left in the heat?
Swinging is fun, but the idea of ruining my peace of mind while renting a flick just isn't appealing.
So - what are the weirdest reasons you've ever said "no"?
Granted, any reason is a good reason. After all "no means no" regardless of why you say it. But how many "left field" no's do we have floating around out there?
Spoomonkey
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By Miss Sunshine
i may be considered a snob but I like to see and lick a pussy that doesn't have too much hanging labia (gets in the way). I like a bigger clit, one you can suck on, mmmmm. I had an experience with another lady once that when she was aroused, her clit swelled to the point it looked like a very small cock, we rubbed pussies together and I could actually feel some penetration, it was very nice to suck.
Cocks, I need them circumsized, sorry. size doesn't matter but once in awhile I love to run into a huge one.
Don't get me wrong, I have had different shapes and sizes, cut and uncut, I am just saying what my preference is.
Cleanliness, there have been a few people who haven't been clean and it was not nice and I left them standing.
What about you all?
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By NHCuriousCouple
We've been married for 10 years and are brand new to this lifestyle. After much discussion, my husband and I placed a profile on a swinger's site and found many couples, but narrowed it down to one we really, really clicked with. The husband of the couple and I chatted for many, many hours a day and then brought our spouses into a group chat. We chatted online for a few weeks (all parties individually and as a group) and then decided to meet in person.
After a really amazing day and evening with them, we met them again 2 days later and then again 2 days after that. Our days were full of fun, laughter, dinner, and some really hot soft swapping.
Unfortunately, something happened along the way, pretty early on, and I fell hard for the husband of the other couple and he fell for me as well. I was completely honest with my husband and immediately told him about my feelings for this person. He was accepting of it and doesn't feel threatened or insecure in any way about it. My husband also told me at that point that he has strong feelings for the wife of the couple, which was also fine with me. The problem is this.....the wife of the other couple has feelings for my husband, but just at a friendship level at this point. When she found out that her husband and I are into this way deeper than the other two, she panicked and now needs time to sort things out.
In my head, the fact that he and I developed deep feelings for each other doesn't change anything. I would never leave my husband for anyone and he has said the same. They're just that....feelings. So, my question is...what are we to do? This is so scary to leave this in the hands of one person. I really thought we were all on the same page and moving along very well together, but now we've hit this roadblock. I can only hope it's a temporary one and that the wife will come to realize that I really want nothing from her husband and there's no way I'd ever leave mine. I'm completely happy where I am. I'm of the mindset that people can love more than one person at a time, but I realize that not everyone is like me.
Do we just wait for her to make a decision or do we just call it quits? It would be very, very difficult for me to do so, but I don't want anyone to get hurt in this situation.
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