Bi guys over age 45, your input please

[Tia Vampire 167]

In this journey of the lifestyle I have encountered more and more bi guys. Most of the guys are 45 and over. They once were married, have children, and are divorced. Most of them state that they wanted to explore their bi side only after divorcing. Some have even stated that they have lost interest in women all together.

 

I know with most bi women, exploring their bi side is something that they will do when they are younger and I know it's probably because it is more accepted with women, that's maybe why they explore at a younger age. I guess my question to bi guys over the age of 45 is... Why did you wait so long? If you have lost interest in women, was it because of a heartbreak or did your sexual needs change?

 

This is the reason my ex-fiancée and I are no longer together. My sexual needs changed. It seems the older I get, the more I want to explore different things. Not bi things. More BDSM things and with 2 or 3 men. Things that my fiancée thought were weird. Ass spanking, pulling hair, biting and me wanting to be in a MFM, or MMFM is not weird to me at all. Especially since we were in the lifestyle for the variety.

 

So again, what makes a straight man go bi or no interest in women at all?

[doug39 80]

I believe most gay guys try to live a straight lifestyle and deny their attraction to men as long as they can because they are embarrassed by it.

 

As a teenager I blew a teenage friend several times and he blew me.

 

At age 23 I let a 50 year old flaming gay guy give me several hand jobs.

 

As a teen I didn't know what gay was and I only let the old queen jack me off because he paid me and I needed the cash.

 

But I consider myself 100% straight.

[twistedpretzels 100]

Bi with fems is more accepted, in my opinion. I feel that perhaps men over 45 explore Bi because they become more comfortable with themselves and the exploration discovery part of their sexuality. I don't know about guys losing interest in women after divorce or what-have-you-- I haven't asked enough men to find out ;0)

 

In this journey of the life-style I have encountered more and more bi guys. Most of the guys are 45 and over. They once were married, have children, and are divorced. Most of them state that they wanted to explore their bi side only after divorcing. Some have even stated that they have lost interest in women all together.

 

I know with most bi women, exploring their bi side is something that they will do when they are younger and I know it's probably because it is more accepted with women, that's maybe why they explore at a younger age. I guess my question to bi guys over the age of 45 is... Why did you wait so long? If you have lost interest in women, was it because of a heartbreak or did your sexual needs change?

 

This is the reason my ex-fiancée and I are no longer together. My sexual needs changed. It seems the older I get, the more I want to explore different things. Not bi things. More BDSM things and with 2 or 3 men. Things that my fiancée thought were weird. Ass spanking, pulling hair, biting and me wanting to be in a MFM, or MMFM is not weird to me at all. Especially since we were in the lifestyle for the variety.

 

So again, what makes a straight man go bi or no interest in women at all?

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

I think there's a lot more bi-guys than are willing to come out and admit it within the lifestyle. It seems like more and more I know of guys (and yes many of them are in the 40+ range) who if they are comfortable with you will admit to enjoying bi-play but they wouldn't post it publicly.

[doug39 80]

As a young man I had so many guys come on to me and want to blow me (for money, drugs, whatever) but I didn't do it because I feared that I would be labeled "GAY".

 

Hell today, at age 48, I would let any of them blow me...

 

It's the whole "I wish I knew then what I know now" crap.

 

That is why 45+ guys are willing to try things.

[ViSexual 1,008]

I've never been homophobic but always found females attractive and not males.

 

After a taste of swinging I knew I didn't want to be monogamous forever. I enjoyed the excitement of sex with someone other than my life partner too much.

 

My wife changed her mind about swinging. And, she'd never agree to let me be with another woman. And, honestly, I could see too much potential for drama there myself.

 

So, the only option that we'd both be OK with was for me to have a guy-buddy with benefits.

[Tia Vampire 167]

Julie, you are correct about the men who have opened up to me. I did not know they were bi until we were alone in a room and they opened up to me. It is definitely a trust and knowing matter.

 

That's a new one for me ViSexual. This is why I enjoy talking to people. Not everyone is going to have the same story and you can learn from each story that you get.

 

I also done some research and came to the conclusion that because older men start to go through that ED phase of life, that too may play a part in why older men go bi. Some men estrogen levels increase. It's also the reason why older men are more attentive to a woman's needs. I new it was a reason I was more attracted to older men.

[km34 672]

It's also the reason why older men are more attentive to a woman's needs.

 

I'm sorry this is off topic, but I've been seeing this assumption A LOT around here lately. In my experience, age has had nothing to do with how attentive a man is to my needs. My husband is the youngest I've been with (not counting high school days), and he is the most attentive man I've ever seen to all of the women he is with whereas I've had brief contact with a few men over 40 and every single one has been in a hurry to get his dick in. I'm not trying to be rude or hijack the thread or anything, but why is it assumed that because a man is young he is more likely to be inconsiderate of his partner's needs and if he is "older" he will be considerate? And what age is considered older? Maybe THAT's the problem that I'm having here.

[midnightplayer 135]

Take a look at Primetimers, it is a mature men's group that includes gay, bi and straight men. Chapters all over the United States, and a number of National get togethers in Florida and Palm Springs. Good luck, nice to find your other side

[Lascivious L&L 866]

The difference with an older man is experience and living. It's often called wisdom. One aspect of wisdom is not caring so much what people think of you and caring more about what is actually pleasurable.

 

Older is a direction. There is always someone older than you. Yet each of us grows older in life. I remember thinking I was so much older at 30. Now I'm older at 60. And my wonderful aunt is older at 98. Older is the direction life takes us.

 

Once you've experienced blowing another man, the question often is "What the hell was I waiting for???" It seems like such a mountain to go over, but on the other side it seems like but a bump to experience a whole other landscape of pleasure.

 

As a couple, it opens up the sexual geography with new vistas to explore. It seems amazing that so many men will go to their graves never having experienced a whole continent of sexuality. As a playful couple it seems so limiting not to explore so fundamental a sharing.

[MJPanzer 18]

In this journey of the life-style I have encountered more and more bi guys. Most of the guys are 45 and over. ....

 

My sexual needs changed. It seems the older I get, the more I want to explore different things. Not bi things. More BDSM things and with 2 or 3 men. Things that my fiancée thought were weird. Ass spanking, pulling hair, biting and me wanting to be in a MFM, or MMFM is not weird to me at all. Especially since we were in the life-style for the variety.

 

So again, what makes a straight man go bi or no interest in women at all?

 

I (male half) must completely agree: the older I get, the more different things I want to explore and try.

 

The same thing applies to Mrs MJP, as well....she has become quite adventurous recently.

 

I've been interested in trying out some sexual play with males since college, but, for various reasons, had never acted on it, until recently.

 

My main reason was very simple and practical: I was career military and "engaging in homosexual acts" was an instant career-ender. So, rather than screw with all of the potential BS that would come from playing with guys while I was wearing a uniform, I waited until after I retired, which was in my 40s.

 

Now that Mrs MJP and I have been swinging for a while, we've met a number of guys that were at least situationally bi, and I have played a little with some of them. I have to admit that I was a bit nervous at first, but figured that I should try it and see what it was like. If I liked it, I could continue, and if not, well, at least I'd tried it. It turns out that I did like it, so I continue to experiment whenever the opportunity presents itself.

 

It's fun and I enjoy the variety, but it's only an enhancement. For me, the main attraction is, and probably always will be, the ladies: there's nothing quite as lovely and attractive as female sexuality in all its forms -- but that's just my taste and preference......

[Tia Vampire 167]

In a thread way back before my eyes were opened, I wrote that I would loose respect or interest for my boyfriend/husband if he had sex with a guy. I now have a different opinion on that subject. My new boyfriend whom i've been dating for about 2 months now is bi. He started out as my boy toy at a BDSM party. Only thing I can say is, "WOW!!!" wish I had dated a bi guy long time ago.

[SW_PA_Couple 4,024]

. . . Only thing I can say is, "WOW!!!" wish I had dated a bi guy long time ago.

We should all retain this ability to examine situations in new ways. Plenty in my life I now see differently. It' a way of maintaining happiness and you learn about yourself as well.

[JB 140]

Partially agree with what has been said;

 

Not a professional psychologist, but a professional guy over 45 that swings;

 

We have determined that things become different due to both experience and confidence. Many times by 45 most guys know what they are about, they are much more secure in who they are and their roles in life.

 

They have secure incomes, a secure relationship, a secure home situation and therefore become more secure in themselves.

 

Being more secure leads to the ability to go into a situation with much more confidence, kind of like having money when you walk into a store, when I was younger it was more like “what can I afford?” now it's more like “what do I really want?”. Works the same way.

 

Getting to a point where you can have another guys cock in your mouth has less to do with a hunger or desire than it does with the ability to do it and enjoy it.

 

How does that work? Well, as it has been mentioned, the label is less of a concern, I have a great relationship with my wife, and I am involved with a great circle of “play friends” so really, why would I be concerned about someone who does not know me think of me, when everyone that is important in this area KNOWS me?

 

The “hot” factor has the ability come though. If my wife describes something as “hot” I am onboard. Even if that include some kind of male-male contact.

 

The comfort level is dramatically increased. Being in a super confident place sets the stage for more open and direct conversations - something you cannot have too much of in this lifestyle.

 

I could go on, but in a nut shell, it seems to me that guys in this group simply have more mental power available to burn past artificial barriers, and have fun, and it is that ABILITY that makes is more common.

[Tobacouple 111]

The thread title of "Bi guys over age 45, your input please" maybe missing out the segment of 45 and over males who are as I like to describe it "situationally bi". I consider myself hetero. I don't fantasize about sex with other men nor could I ever be in a loving relationship with another male, but low and behold, during my wife and my last encounter with a regular single male, I at one point end up with cock in my mouth. A first for me at 51 years of age. It's just the case that both of us, being in our late forties and early fifties, comfortable in our own identities and having a blast with my wife, (her and I 69 while he did her from behind) it just kind of felt like the right thing to do at moment. We all had fun and it feels great to be that relaxed with our 3rd.

 

I think previous posters such as JB hit on a lot of the reasons, but I also think, at least in my case, that after years of living up to societies expectation of the male stereotype, that middle age men are more willing to let go of that role.

[weloveeachother 29]

The thread title of "Bi guys over age 45, your input please" maybe missing out the segment of 45 and over males who are as I like to describe it "situationally bi". I consider myself hetero. I don't fantasize about sex with other men nor could I ever be in a loving relationship with another male, but low and behold, during my wife and my last encounter with a regular single male, I at one point end up with cock in my mouth.

 

^ This ^ This happened over the weekend. It's been fucking with me ever since. There was a good bit of alcohol involved. I am ok about it, what has fucked with me the most is wondering how my wife viewed it. We have talked about it a good bit this morning and I feel much better now.

 

We are in this lifestyle so that we can experience new things. From these experiences we have learned a lot about ourselves. We don't have a lot of rules anymore. We pretty much just do what feels right in each situation.

 

I am 45 years old, so I fit into the situation the OP asked about. But, I do not consider myself to be bi. I really agree with the description above. It pretty much depends on the situation. I do not fantasize about being with men. My fantasies are more centered around seeing my wife receive pleasure. Whether that is from a man or a woman. She has never considered herself bi and I argued that she must be because she plays with women too. Now I get it! I have been in that situation now and I finally get it.

[Guest eroticart]

I took a few social science/ psychology/philosophy classes in college, we talked about this a bit. One contributing factor is the environment of the society we live in. Sex is everywhere. Men are visual creatures, sexual images turn us on, we are constantly bombarded with them, so our sexuality is heightened. Another is the current attitude about sex in the world. for the first time in history sex is not viewed as something to be ashamed of in general. Alfred Kinsey reached into the American bedroom n the 1950's and set our sexuality free by studying sex in a clinical setting. In the 1960's the Sexual Revolution freed us even more to a state of "free love". In the 1970's Gay Culture first hit the mainstream media by way of the Castro District in San Francisco, the disco scene and Studio 54. Homosexuality has a history that is checkered, it has come in and out of fashion and its level of tolerance has been a fluid thing. With the rise of shows like "the L Word", "Will and Grace", "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy", and a plethora of others, homosexuality is more visible than ever and less threatening to many. In many ways it has been demystified for people and some identify with it more.

[greenrocket59 16]

It wasn't until I was 30 that I actually gave it a go with a guy, I had always been with women and very happy with that but did fantasize about guys from time to time. Now at 45+ I've accepted my bi side as a fixed part of my personality and I won't let any female partner in my life who doesn't accept and encourage it. My experience is that there are plenty of women out there who think m/m is hot so I only seek relationships with them and I'm really comfortable with that.

 

As I've gotten older my sexual horizons have broadened without a doubt. I'm more comfortable with sex and my sexual needs and much more accepting of others needs as well. And even though we bi guys are still the most discriminated against (second only to transexuals) we are less discriminated against in 2012 than 1980! So more men are opening up I think.

 

I also agree that there is a huge "down-low" population of straight guys out there in general.

[JohnandCari 15]

We've been together over 23 years, and I've always (the male half) enjoyed anal play from her and we've had a lot of fantasy talk during sex about me with men, so it's been a fantasy for years. We didn't start swinging until a few months ago, and we found a bi guy to play with and it was the most fun ever. We all just enjoyed playing with each other, I got to do all the things I'd fantasized about for years and found I really really enjoyed it, and she enjoyed watching me. I quickly went from curious to bi in a second. It's extremely relaxing and enjoyable for everyone to just enjoy each other with no worries. It's not just age though, we found a very nice young 26 year old man that enjoys playing with us both. I have noticed, that a lot of guys, young and older, that don't openly admit to it because too many couples and women flat out won't play with bi or curious males. What I've realized over the years is that I don't consider it any kind of homosexuality, I don't want a relationship with a man, I love being with my wife for companionship, but playing sexually, yes, I'm very open and enjoy men and women.

[starrman 15]

JohnandCari, I have about the same take on the subject as you. I don't have any emotional desires to be with another man, but in a MFM situation, I'm all in for the fun. Growing up, I had the typical experimenting stage with another boy, but it ended there in my adolescence. I was always concerned about my self-image, afraid I would think less of myself if I had a sexual attraction for another guy. And also the fear of what my partner would think about me as a man. But as we grew older together, my wife and I, we became more supportive and self-confident of each other. (Love is the big factor.) So when opportunities presented themselves, I (we) embraced them. I haven't experienced everything bi, yet, and not sure I want to go that far. I am orally bi at this point, but one can never say never to other possibilities in the right situation and with the right person.

[KAZUALCPLE 33]

It took me many years to become truly comfortable with my sexuality. I decided it was time I enjoyed sex in general and to stop labeling the act. I just enjoy sex with both men and women. Sex is sex. Sensuality is sensuality. I find it unnecessary to group the act into specific fields.

 

Have fun, enjoy it and eliminate the need for stigma and labels. Play with whomever you like the way you like. After all, it's just sex. It doesn't need to be complicated. Just enjoyed!

[Guest thewriter]

Part of it is Bi men are more accepted in the swinger community now. If you have never suck another man's cock it is quite pleasurable. The first cock I sucked was my mom's cousin when I was a teenager I enjoyed it very muck suck him off many times. Now I am older (56) have not sucked a cock in years if I had the chance with the wife's permission yes, I would suck another man's cock. I have to say there is something very sensual about feeling a hard cock in your mouth.

[Sirramm 111]

I'm an openly orally bi-male to many and my current wife and I have talked about previous experiences, although she hasn't yet gotten on board with the swinging scene yet. I've liked giving blowjobs for many years and while with my ex-wife and gf, as I stated on a previous thread, been asked to leave 'parties' because me and another guy blew each other. I think it is a sad state of affairs that male bisexuality is frowned upon while female bisexuality is largely 'expected'. I don't kiss guys or have any other form of sex with them nor am I actually attracted to any part of them other than their dick and balls. I don't know if age is a factor in men finding their bi side as much as the fact that they finally realize there are many other sexual activities. I think mainstream porn has pushed the female scene so much that most young men don't consider sucking a dick as it is widely and largely unaccepted in media AND society. It isn't until that hit that "period" of time that they suddenly are able to explore many other options.

[raem608 15]

I think it can be a combination of things. A heartbreak and the frustrating endless search for what he lost and now can't find in another woman combined with him getting older, less attractive to woman and he physically can not perform as he once did.

[KAZUALCPLE 33]

I see nothing wrong with this type of sexual activity...not even in a group environment. Sexual play should be enjoyed by all and not frowned upon by any. If two guys want to play, let them enjoy it. Bisexual play should not be limited to only females. Some of us guys enjoy giving head too. It's just sex.

[OLDER BIGUY 21]

I agree I was 55 when I had my first experience with a man. Have had many since. only had one occasion where it was brought into question by his wife, ha told her to shut up about it I must have been doing a good job of it.

[OLDER BIGUY 21]

I was 50 when I first found I liked to be with men. My wife of 32 years would never give me oral but did like me doing her. She passed in 2000. About a year later I found a women on AFF who hardly did anything but oral, I loved it so much I had to try a man to see what the attraction was. I then got into being bi. We went to a club called Chameleons in phoenix and found I was not alone. Now at age 70 I find m/m play fun but f/m far superior; to this day I love a good ass, either male or female, a blow job is just as good with either.

[raem608 15]

If a man's wife or gf like it and are comfortable with her man giving oral to another man then what else is there? The rest of the world has nothing to do with it. It's all good. In my late 40's I met a woman on an internet date site and after we got together a few times she invited me over to her house. I knew she was married. She wanted me to give her a massage in front of her husband. I reluctantly agreed because she really turned me on and she said he liked that kind of thing. I on the other hand never would even think of doing such a thing.(I never thought about being with a man AT ALL). As I was giving her a massage her husband came over and had her suck him. The next thing I knew she gently pulled me down to her mouth and slid his cock in my mouth. (she was very persuasive). Up until that very moment I would have never considered or thought of doing that (giving oral to a man) but at that moment it felt right and I was comfortable with it. So I guess you never know! It was fun.

[lizard-lix 32]

For me it has been a return. I started out bi, my first lover was my best male friend and we had a relationship that started when we were 11 and lasted 7 years. We were poly in that we had other male and female partners while together. We split when we headed to college and drifted apart (but reconnected about 5 years ago on Facebook, we are buddies again, but he has avoided any discussion about those days and our relationship).

 

I remained poly, but did not take any more male lovers through college. I met Lizardess, fell in love, we married (I came out to her before we tied the knot) and I asked her if she wanted to have an open relationship. She said no, and I figured OK, time to be 'normal.'

 

For almost 30 years I was content to be a straight, monogamous husband. Then her libido stated to wane and mine went in exactly the opposite direction. After a lot of working on it together, she has regained a lot of her libido and we have added kink in ways that we never had, including going to swinger's and fetish clubs, but so far no playing with others.

 

My bi side came back out too. I really want to be with guys again and have several bi guy buddies, but so far monogamy is still the rule. However if I had one chance, I'd likely try a guy rather than a girl. This happened spontaneously. No idea why. I still love women, but I want guys again too.

 

If we do open up, I definitely want to play with bi guys. My real fantasy is to find another similar couple. If the girls want to play with each other fine. But I'd be totally happy if we could both play with the other's opposite sex partner and us guys would get to play too.

 

So I am definitely bi (about a Kinsey 3 - 4). It came back to me all bi itself...

[yorktownvaguy 76]

When I got to the end I finally realized this is an old post, but I think it is an important and fascinating one; so I hope we can resurrect it.

I am a 60 y/o bi guy who has been in the LS for the past 10 years. My first experience was with a couple and both partners went down on me. First her and then she called him over; something like "have a taste of this."The couple was very gentle with me; they knew it was my first mmf and he asked me to touch him, which I did, but that was it. I have never looked back since.

 

Now when walking in the street, shopping etc, there is absolutely no attraction from me with men. I can melt by just seeing a confident, self aware lady who is happy in her body. Looks are not that important to me; I am more into how she carries herself. Although looks definitively help. Again, I never walk past a guy about who I have any sexual thoughts. However, once naked I have no problem playing with them, in fact I enjoy it.

 

I have always wondered about the swingers adds. From these adds it appeared that women were proportionally more bi-sexual than men. Looking at the adds I think the call for bi guys outnumbers the call for bi women by 10 to 1 or something like that. I think we have seen a remarkable shift in society during the past couple of years. Gay or lesbian is now widely seen as acceptable if not one of the normal types of relationships. I am wondering if this is the reason why more men finally dare to come out as being bi-sexual or are even willing to shed this macho heterosexual image and admit that they are willing and interested in playing with guys; either alone or in a mmf setting.

 

For myself, from my teenage years have I been interested in being part of a mmf relationship, either as a friend with benefits or even a live in situation. This never materialized, maybe for the reasons I mentioned above, although I have never been homophobic. But yes I had to wait until I was 48 or 49 for my first experience with a guy.

 

Again, an interesting discussion, and I hope I make sense.

 

Cheers.

[Havasmoke 29]

I am not in the lifestyle and have only ever been with one woman at a time. Swinging definitely gets my fantasies going and I love reading about others experiences. I must admit that as a confirmed heterosexual, my thoughts have definitely been changing as I get older. Being with a guy would have been a big turn-off when I was younger. Now I find myself fantasizing about being with a couple and wanting male to male sexual activity. I do feel that it is a function of getting older but I don't really understand why.

[raem608 15]

I experimented when I was around 13 with a neighbor. He first initiated role play where he took the dominate role. After a few years I discovered girls and pretty much left it behind me. I am now in my 50's and find I am rediscovering those feelings. I don't know, maybe because I don't feel I have the sexual physical power I had when I was younger.

[male4ypleasure 66]

Personally not looking for a bi guy for one on one. However, always welcome and enjoy bi play during mfm. Some of the best play dates have been with couples with a straight profile. Once we started to play it became obvious the husband wanted to share me as much as sharing the wife. This has lead to three ltr with bi play being an intimate part of all future play dates.

[herpob 564]

So again, what makes a straight man go bi or no interest in women at all?

 

ME! I am what hopefully makes my man go bi. Oh please oh please oh please - it is so HOT!!!

[male4ypleasure 66]

I totally agree with tobacouple. I have come to really enjoy bi play as part of a sensual erotic mfm, but have no desire to meet and play strictly mm. I have also found just like myself as men mature and become totally comfortable with themselves they enjoy all forms of sexual experiences and pleasures they wouldn't consider while younger. I guess this makes me situationally bi. I know my most sexually satisfying mfm's have been with bi/ bi-curious couples.

[NakedInSeattle 159]

I'm bi and my wife knows and enjoys it. I started for the simple reason that it felt good and turned her on.

 

But I want to talk about an aspect of 'bi men over 45' not mentioned here. I talk with a lot of bi mature men who are bi mainly because the wife has lost interest in sex. No need to enumerate the various reasons for this but it's generally accepted that more mature ladies lose interest in sex than mature men. Given that, the poor, sexually frustrated man is faced with choices and if the wife is prudish (as is often the case), the only choice that doesn't have negative repercussions is abstinence. Of the others, male-to-male sex is the choice with the least feeling of guilt. "It's not really cheating because it isn't with a woman." And guess what! He enjoys the intimate contact with another human and it feels good!

 

Technically, it is cheating and if the wife finds out, she'll kick his sorry ass to the curb and life as he knows it will be over including family disgrace. But he does it because it is better than dealing with life without sex.

 

This is kinda off topic since this is a site for and about swingers but I thought my $0.02 might be of interest because 'swinging' with men in an MFM is part of our experience and this category of men is included often.

[SW_PA_Couple 4,024]

. . . No need to enumerate the various reasons for this but it's generally accepted that more mature ladies lose interest in sex than mature men. . .

I am not a bi man but you are going to receive my input anyway. My experience tells me that 45 is the age at which women gain interest and men generally decline.

[starrman 15]

You are right, but unfortunately, that mid-life resurgence of sexuality in a woman is not universal, nor does it always sustain itself over a long period of time.

 

I am not a bi man but you are going to receive my input anyway. My experience tells me that 45 is the age at which women gain interest and men generally decline.

[herpob 564]

You are right, but unfortunately, that mid-life resurgence of sexuality in a woman is not universal, nor does it always sustain itself over a long period of time.

 

So far mine has kicked in overdrive and has yet to wane. My husband's has been average since I met him and stayed the same. He does more for me than he would otherwise. I think the while trying the bi thing has possible sparked some excitement in him, though he will not admit it.

[iluvlicnhr 19]

I think as younger men we tend to try to be the all around macho man. I had an experience very young and at the time was horrified and never spoke of it until I lost my wife and started dreaming about it. I had blocked it for years and suddenly was turned on when thinking about it.

 

My last girlfriend was very good at getting me to be able to talk about it and then we went into a bit more but now I want to have the experience with a few couples so I can be a little more than just a old memory to use to get off. I am so excited when I think I'm gonna try this out.

[GMOFLEISURE 221]

For me it has been a return. I started out bi, my first lover was my best male friend and we had a relationship that started when we were 11 and lasted 7 years. We were poly in that we had other male and female partners while together. We split when we headed to college and drifted apart (but reconnected about 5 years ago on Facebook, we are buddies again, but he has avoided any discussion about those days and our relationship).

 

........

 

 

My bi side came back out too. I really want to be with guys again and have several bi guy buddies, but so far monogamy is still the rule. However if I had one chance, I'd likely try a guy rather than a girl. This happened spontaneously. No idea why. I still love women, but I want guys again too.

 

If we do open up, I definitely want to play with bi guys. My real fantasy is to find another similar couple. If the girls want to play with each other fine. But I'd be totally happy if we could both play with the other's opposite sex partner and us guys would get to play too.

 

So I am definitely bi (about a Kinsey 3 - 4). It came back to me all bi itself...

 

This is opposite most of the others here & closer to my experience. I started having sex with men at age 21 & ceased around age 26 or 27. This year I started at age 61 to play with men again. Precisely what the revival of the interest is due to I've not dug into. My interest then & now is in the context of group settings. I've played with males 1/1, but that has been much less often than in groups & now I'm seeking mixed gender couples or groups for sex far more actively than single males.

[2aussies 51]

I've sucked three cock since my wife and I split up, and I'm planning to suck another one soon because his wife is too busy to join us, But I consider myself bi and the other bloke's wife is okay with it, so why not. It doesn't affect me out in the real world.

And it's fun.

[kikonkrome 844]

I just really started exploring my super kinky side in the last few years. My super kinky side has blown hotter and colder through out my life. It's only lately in the last three years that I have really pushed boundaries that I previously had. So I have tried group sex, dom/sub and bi-sexuality. Honestly I look forward to doing most of them again. It was fun being a sub, but I definitely only do it for the wife to enjoy. I am a pretty crappy sub and never really do what I am told.

 

I will also say that any guys that I was attracted to I certainly felt were not attracted to me. Even the guy I have been with had to ask me if I was into it because he wasn't sure. Lucky him for taking the risk I guess?? I certainly am more on the bear side than, ok I am bear. Not the guy you typically associate with being into another guy at all.

[GMOFLEISURE 221]

... I am a pretty crappy sub and never really do what I am told.

 

...

 

LoL. I'm a crappy game player & break character almost immediately.

[yorktownvaguy 76]

I still believe in the statistics I once heard that we are all on that continuum from 1 to 100, meaning 1 is 100% heterosexual and 100 is 100% gay. Honestly, we might not realize where we are on that continuum, or we might slide around on it a bit with age and/or experience.

[herpob 564]

Most recently - speaking for some ladies... I discovered bisexuality in college - both girls and guys, way more girls than guys of course but still a good many bi guys. Most of them were not so into the guys though as they were the girls who put them up to it all. As for me, I loved watching and participating with the bi guys, it was a blast! I loved getting my pussy eaten and I didn't care by whom and it was easy to trade it out, I even got into eating there for a while but my real love was playing with the bi boys. I totally grew out of pussy and only into guys for about almost 2 decades, but now I am back on a roll with T, A, & P. Oh my fav is still bi guys going at it but I am hitting a new stride myself with the ladies.

 

With regards to men, I agree with the original poster, I see way more older men going bi and even gay than younger. But then again that is who I am around more so... As for why - when asked they all say for variety, more frequency, and more cum. I thought the later was the most fascinating. Yuuuummm!

 

And as for my husband - he is exploring it all because of me. He sees how crazy hot I get around the other bi men and all the fun we are all having, I believe it has been the most influential aspect of opening him up to the idea of sucking guys with me and taking form a guy anally. He is definitely leaning that way more openly now. He still is VERY adamant about not fucking a guy, which is perfectly fine by me (that is what he has me for

[love2dp 52]

Interesting thread as I am apparantly looking to explore my sexuality with this exact subject. For me its just the difficulty of finding a woman period. Men are easy. If I like it maybe I will continue to play. If not I am fine with woman. I am working toward a male friends with benifits thing possibly. Little wierd to me but I'm willing to be open to trying.

[herpob 564]

Interesting thread as I am apparantly looking to explore my sexuality with this exact subject. For me its just the difficulty of finding a woman period. Men are easy. If I like it maybe I will continue to play. If not I am fine with woman. I am working toward a male friends with benifits thing possibly. Little wierd to me but I'm willing to be open to trying.

 

One of my now best friend's husband (who is bi), says the same thing, that is is so much easier to get guys to have sex and especially play sexually that he and his male friends do not even bother with women outside our circle. It simply is not worth the effort.

 

The reason I say that this lady is now one of my best friends is due to the fact that since first being on this site my search for other women of like mind has within the past year brought me to some of the most wonderfully sexual couples I could have ever imagined. The ladies are as crazy about their men being bisexual as I am. My husband is still not there but he does participate in a lot of the group play now. I so love watching the men go at it with their wives approval and encouragement. Even my husband admits it is an enormous turn on!

 

I posed your statement to the rest of the men in the group, they all agree - there is hardly ever any hassle getting men to suck them off or to get them to let them suck'em. Anal can be more challenging but to my surprise they said they are able to find a lot more men willing to do them than vise versa. I thought that odd. As my husband puts it, "Cum and cock is something a lady doesn't have so that makes a man necessary for sex play in that realm but anally a woman is hot, a guy is not!"