Soft swap first timers
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By Interestme82
Hi out there. I’m married and in an evolving relationship. Last year I did a burlesque photo shoot for him as a gift. He loved the way it turned out but asked if I’d be willing to do something more risqué in the future. I got a reference from the original photographer (female) and told my husband the new photographer would be a male. Being the protective husband he is we both requested a meeting over a cup of coffee. We met which was great and made things all the more comfortable. I loved what I saw from his book and my husband did as well.
We had the shoot and the pictures came out great. He got really turned on by knowing another guy was doing the pictures. I was shocked. I asked him if he’d consider doing a couples shoot with me and he said he’d try but was reluctant. Pretty soon after he agreed and we were off again.
Prior to the shoot my husband and the photographer talked about his career. My husband, who’s faithful, shocked me a bit with his envy and open talk about what the photographer experienced. I’m extremely open and joined in the conversation. Both of us felt like we were conversing with someone we really liked and knew a lot longer than we actually did. Unfortunately my husband had difficulties getting hard which is completely out of the ordinary. The photographer said it happened a lot and just to relax.
Surprisingly at my husband's request he asked for me to do a POV shoot the photographer showed us in his book. Basically it’s the photographer including himself in various ways while taking the pictures. As we started taking the pictures I liked being touched by the photographer even though it wasn’t active foreplay or sex. It really was strictly for the pictures themselves. During the pictures my husband quickly got hard and watched. Eventually the photographer asked him if he was going to get involved. The rest of the shoot went as we planned. Afterwards we all sat around and talked and went through the pictures.
Some time passed again and we talked a lot about the fun we had with it. My husband admitted he liked watching the photographer touch me and if not for that he may have been to nervous to get hard.
I really want this to develop further but I’m apprehensive because it’s a major change in life obviously. I’m also not sure about how I feel about seeing him with someone else. When I say I’m not sure I mean most likely not. I don’t even really think he wants to. I almost feel like if I bring that up it will be too much too fast. Multiple times when having sex we’ve dirty talked about me doing another shoot and giving myself up. I’d feel more comfortable to actually do it than talk about it.
I feel like my husband has opened a door that I want to walk into. Am I reading it wrong? Is it best for me to just set something else up and let it work itself the way it will? Based on our interactions I have no doubt the photographer would be into it also. Would I be going to far given our relationship if I reached out to the him and told him how I feel, how my husband feels, and confirm he’d say yes?
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By Avgjoe
The wife and I have always talked about another person in the bedroom. key word talked.
A short time ago I had mentioned that maybe it is time to pursue this idea. To my surprise she said sure.
Now this is our idea. Has anybody ever started out with strippers? I feel this is possibly the easiest way to find out if both parties involved are going to be able to handle the situation. I'm hoping to get a private show for her and sit back and see how it affects me.
I've already said that I'm probably not ready for her to jump right on and give it hell, but a more aggressive touch session is what I'm thinking. Has anyone ever explored this idea and how did it go?
Also, if anyone has done this out in Vegas, what agency did you use? We are planning to be out in Vegas in October and want to start looking for an agency.
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By Santokos
First of all I would like to apologise for my English , as it’s not my first language. I’m a married guy and I just told my wife that my fantasy is to have sex with her and to be watched. So my question is what is better as a first timer , to go with my wife to a swingers club or to just meet another couple and have same room sex. What do you guys suggest? I’m not into wife swap. I just love to be watched
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By 2TexasTornados
My wife and I have been married for 14 years and began our journey into swinging over 2 years ago. We have a model marriage, rock solid and exceptionally sexually charged. It all started when our best (vanilla) friends asked my wife to video them having sex, and she was shocked. We discussed it, and I really liked the idea. It didn't happen, but we began discussing our private fantasies. My ultimate fantasy is to watch her having sex with another man. That desire took us down the road to swinging. We found our first swinger couple online, and became full swap. Only rule: We play together; same room sex. On that bases, we're able to signal each other if anything negative comes up.
Fast forward to present day. We've had a mutual (married) friend that we've known since college (15 years). This summer my wife confided in the guy of the other couple that we were swingers. He thought the idea was tantalizing, and immediately started introducing the idea to his wife. Within two months all the ground work had been laid and I ended up giving his wife a massage that ended up nude and I had sex with her (completely sanctioned by our spouses). We were alone in the living room late at night- the other two had left us alone because I was working on my assignment. Upon notifying my wife and the other husband, they went directly to the upstairs bedroom and caught up. This stretched our same room swinging rule, but since we were introducing vanilla friends to the wide world of recreational sex it was acceptable.
By chance we had already planned a mutual vacation in Las Vegas for the following month. In all the hot discussions with our friends with new benefits we ended up negotiating an overnight wife swap. All three of them wanted it, and I decided since it was Vegas, lets try it all. One night became all 4 nights almost right away. I didn't want that, didn't like it, but I reserved judgement. I wasn't going to be the Debbie Downer of the group in Las Vegas. So we went ahead as planned. 4 nights of separate closed door sex. I couldn't believe I had gotten myself into.
Now my wife and her (boy)friend of 15 years have all but established our group as a polyamorous. They only play behind that goddammed closed door, and I hate it. I have the same privilege with his wife, but for me I only consider myself a NSA swinger. Not a closed polyamorous "I love you" relationship. My wife is in love with this guy, we see them on 6 week intervals (240 miles separate us) and I don't know what to do. It's so far along now that I'll destroy the friendship if I pull the All-Stop lever now. I don't see the other-wife that I've been assigned as being in the same attraction class as my wife. He, on the other hand is ga-ga over my wife, and they have talked up a bond that rivals my own marriage. She's admitted to me that they're saying their I-Love-You's behind that damn closed door.
I've imposed time limits on them now, 1.5 hours is it behind that door. My wife respects that and follows it, but I know she (they) want more and likely resent it. I'm iron clad on that, and have shut out all discussions about more time -> all night swaps again. If I had foreseen any of this when we started swinging 2 years ago I would have squashed it. But now I'm here, and I'm conflicted. I can suppress my (is it jitters? jealousy?), but it keeps popping up and I become moody over the worst case scenario of those two running off and starting a bakery together. I don't want to stop what's possibly a good thing, but my primary fantasy has been permanently removed: watching my wife enjoy sex with another man.
I've deleted all our swingers profiles on the lifestyle sites in protest. I might just passively remove myself from the group. I'm so afraid of damaging my awesome marriage over this. Tell me, what would you do?
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By kayjay2k
Wow, ok, where to begin...jealousy is tearing me (Mrs. Jay) apart. I've told my husband on several occasions that I am fine with everything and he has developed a very non-threatening relationship with another lady. I know her and we hang out on occasion and she is a great girl! She is not interested in women at all, so it has developed as just an awesome relationship for my husband. And she is completely aware of the situation and totally fine with what she has with my husband and actually knows that eventually she will move on and find a husband of her own.
Unfortunately I have been dealing with a lot of feelings of jealousy, which I never thought would happen and found myself trying to hide it... from myself first and therefore also from my husband. Over the last two months however, it has been rearing its ugly head pretty much every few days. And I have very badly jaded my husband by it. I didn't even realize that it was happening even though my husband on several occasions told me that it was likely the culprit.
I had another freak out session yesterday and have completely turned my husband off to me for the time being. I fear I am trying to hold so tight to him now that I just keep pushing him further away. I feel rather helpless and hopeless at this point. Any constructive advice would be great! (Please no, "you shouldn't have gotten into this in the first place..." We knew exactly what we were getting into.)
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