MFM and married males

[Lawtonka 36]

First post... and I want to ask a question.

 

We've had a few experiences, and recently a MFM which was the most amazing time! Seeing her pleasured and cum on another guy's cock was a tremendous turn-on for both of us. He had a very nice and thick eight inch cock, which we both sucked for nearly two hours. Seeing her penetrated and tremble with excitement really got me going.

 

Since she knew he was married, she has commented that doing married guys is her preference.

 

I didn't have the guts to ask her why. Any ideas?

[mauijanedoe 1,414]

First, welcome. Second, you'll have to ask. "Honey, you know how you said doing married guys is your preference? Why is that?"

 

We can speculate pretty much forever, but she's the only one with the actual answer.

[SW_PA_Couple 4,024]

WELCOME to The Swingersboard. I have learned a lot about women and womankind at this Web site and I hope you do too.

[Lawtonka 36]

First, welcome. Second, you'll have to ask. "Honey, you know how you said doing married guys is your preference? Why is that?"

 

We can speculate pretty much forever, but she's the only one with the actual answer.

 

While I agree that would be the simplest way to find out.. I think she might be too embarrassed to answer truthfully. I've tried to get her to describe how his big cock made her feel, and she won't talk about it.

 

Somehow I would prefer to not approach the subject, even though I would like to understand.

[fun4Ds 1,098]

First post... and I want to ask a question.

 

We've had a few experiences, and recently a MFM which was the most amazing time! Seeing her pleasured and cum on another guys cock was a tremendous turn-on for both of us. He had a very nice and thick eight inch cock, which we both sucked for nearly two hours. Seeing her penetrated and tremble with excitement really got me going.

 

Since she knew he was married, she has commented that doing married guys is her preference.

 

I didn't have the guts to ask her why. Any ideas?

 

Welcome to the Swingers Board, Lawtonka. I think you'll find the answers here diverse because of the limited information you've provided, and, this might carry into understanding your own relationship as well with this woman. I hope you'll find the answers your looking for here.

As to why she prefers "married men" ? I'd be inclined to think its for emotional safety reasons. She would hold the power in some ways over him/them knowing if any thing goes off the rails in this sexual enjoyment, she has the upper hand in disclosure to this mans wife. Not necessarily by blackmail, but by power and control. Many do include the cheating married males for this reason too.

On the other hand, it could be she gets the thrill of the "cheat". You didn't mention if the wives of the prefered married male sex partners were in on the sex you've had, or intend to have. That would be important to know in discussing this here with the Swingers Board community.

 

At this point, it would be a good time to really introduce yourself with more information in regards to your relationship. Are you two married, in a committed relationship ? If so, how long and what are your ages and such ? How did you meet this married man ? Just to eliminate some of the guessing by the community here.

 

 

 

 

 

While I agree that would be the simplest way to find out.. I think she might be too embarrassed to answer truthfully. I've tried to get her to describe how his big cock made her feel, and she won't talk about it.

 

Somehow I would prefer to not approach the subject, even though I would like to understand.

You don't want to approach the subject after fucking this married guy together ? You should have approached this Long before you did !

 

So you would question her honesty, Now ? Or, is it your own self doubt ? Thats the bigger question I would have at this point if I were in this position. Personally, I'd have to answer these two questions before inquireing how a big cock made her feel ?

 

Without trust, first and foremost, you might just be getting the answers that, she thinks, you want to hear.

 

Please elaborate here and read around some of the forums already asked by others, you just might find some answers.

 

 

Enjoy the forums and the community

[mauijanedoe 1,414]

I've tried to get her to describe how his big cock made her feel, and she won't talk about it.

 

That's not a question I'd answer, either, not without knowing why you wanted to know and whether there was a right answer. And even then, I might not answer, except to tell you to try it yourself if you were that interested. Since I pretty much answer all questions, I can see why your wife wouldn't answer, either.

 

Asking your wife to explain a preference for married men is a different sort of question, because there's no wrong answer and it's not massively intrusive, the way the other is.

 

However, I will say that in my lamentable past, I too had a preference for married men. It was mostly because there was less chance of attachment and also because it was a bit of a turn on knowing that being with me upped their libido and caused them to have more sex with their wives.

[Lawtonka 36]

Thanks for the responses.

 

We met him online through CL, and had actually planned to invite another female over this same night. She had previously done a FFM, so it was time to give the MMF situation a try.

 

The other lady kept us waiting, so we decided to invite Solomon over. We were both very nervous inviting someone over to our house at such a late hour, but he showed up ontime and I escorted him straight to our bedroom so as to not stir the rest of the family. Once in the room, I asked my wife if she would like for me to watch for a while, and she said lets all get on the bed.

 

I started to take off my clothes, and he followed suit. He jumped into the bed and sat back against the headboard and smiled. Solomon is a very sexy and young man about 30 yrs old, and the excitement in the room was intoxicating. My wife moved in between his legs and I sat down on the bed opposite him. She took his fat cock into her hands and bent over and started to lick on the head. I was in heaven! I got closer so I could see all that was happening and my life long dream started to unfold before my eyes. My wife was hot for it and started sucking his big and fat cock enjoying every second.

 

Getting even closer, I was hoping soon she would offer him to me (I am bi and she is aware). But she kept sucking him and obviously enjoying his thickness. Finally she pointed him towards me and we both started to blow him. It was so big!!! He wasn't longer than I (we're both about eight inches), but I was sure he was a little thicker and I could honestly tell this was as much a turn on for her as was for me.

 

Soon after they switch around and he parted her legs and was about to mount her. I asked do you want me to guide him into your pussy, and she responded "God yes, do it". Solomon proceeded to fuck my wife good and hard and it was the most amazing thing seeing him make her cum as his tight ass pistoned in and out of her. She moaned and cried out and I could tell she was in absolute bliss.

 

Later after we took turns blowing him in a myriad of positions, he started to have trouble keeping it up. Oh no! The two of them made out constantly, which is something she said she would never do. In the end, he couldn't cum, and I thought that was a little strange and a bit of a let down since we had discussed it was one of our mutual fantasies to see/feel another man cum inside her.

 

We thanked Solomon for the wonderful time, and asked that he please be discreet about what we had done.

[Swingularity 108]

Married males, who don't have explicit permission from their spouse to play, are cheating. We are both 100% against facilitating a man who cheats on his spouse. To extrapolate further: "Let's see...this man lies to and cheats on his wife, and kids if he has them, but he'll be honest to us...acquaintances who he wants something from? A big part of swinging for us is trust in eachother and trust in our partners. We're supposed to trust a cheater? No way for us! Married men's betrayed wives, in our humble opinion, deserve our consideration.

[M1F2KTJ 473]

No breakfast.

[Lawtonka 36]

No breakfast.

 

Unfortunately he had to leave after that week, so our first experience with Solomon will be our only. I hate that because him and the wife really seemed to connect, and the intimacy factor made things so much better. We will be looking for another like him very soon!

[JandKinBoise 858]

Definitely 2 sides to this. J agrees with Swingularity, as she doesn't want to be "that woman" and a possible home wrecker. I, on the other hand, would prefer a discreet married guy because I think he would be less clingy, less likely to get attached, and less likely to be carrying an std.

 

I'll give you my opinion about your first issue. You said in your second post toward the end of the event, they were making out constantly, something she said she would never do. She has justified having NSA sex as something without emotion, strictly for fun. She can't do this with making out. Making out is very emotional and very close. More so than sex. Since he is married, she can open herself up to him with less fear of him falling in love. She can have the "total experience" with you 2.

[Lawtonka 36]

Definitely 2 sides to this. J agrees with Swingularity, as she doesn't want to be "that woman" and a possible home wrecker. I, on the other hand, would prefer a discreet married guy because I think he would be less clingy, less likely to get attached, and less likely to be carrying an std.

 

I'll give you my opinion about your first issue. You said in your second post toward the end of the event, they were making out constantly, something she said she would never do. She has justified having NSA sex as something without emotion, strictly for fun. She can't do this with making out. Making out is very emotional and very close. More so than sex. Since he is married, she can open herself up to him with less fear of him falling in love. She can have the "total experience" with you 2.

 

J&K I think you got it exactly right, she feels she can share some intimacy without ANY fear of it going to far. In this situation they are both very secure in their marriages and there's absolutely no worries about love and just a pure NSA experience.

 

The guys have been a bit better looking than I (we have since had a second experience with MFM), but I'm very well hung and she claims a great lover. So we're all getting something out of this, and I have to say its the most fun I've ever had.

[Swingularity 108]

Definitely 2 sides to this. J agrees with Swingularity, as she doesn't want to be "that woman" and a possible home wrecker. I, on the other hand, would prefer a discreet married guy because I think he would be less clingy, less likely to get attached, and less likely to be carrying an std.

 

I'll give you my opinion about your first issue. You said in your second post toward the end of the event, they were making out constantly, something she said she would never do. She has justified having NSA sex as something without emotion, strictly for fun. She can't do this with making out. Making out is very emotional and very close. More so than sex. Since he is married, she can open herself up to him with less fear of him falling in love. She can have the "total experience" with you 2.

 

Must disagree with alot of your words, sorry to say and IOHO, JandK.

 

Why would a "discreet married guy" be less clingy or less likely to get attached? Really? Why? Does a marriage vow & marriage license (which, btw, you are not respecting as a cheater) come with some kind of special exemption? If so, we've never heard of it.

 

Less likely to carry an STD? Really? Why? There's an old saying "If he/she cheats WITH you, he/she will cheat ON you". Feel free to take a look at any of the numerous infidelity recovery sites on the internet. I have a sibling who needed to go to them years ago due to a cheating spouse. Guess what...the STD's passed along from cheating husbands and wives to their affair partners (or swingers like us!) is a FUCKING HUGE amount. There are thread after thread, stickies, and replies discussing all kinds of "GIFTS" married guys and gals are passing their "Play friends". The numbers are simply staggering. Feel free to take a look yourself.

 

Since "good swinging" is by many considered "ethical non-monogamy" (at least by many), how can incorporating a cheating man into your "ethically non-monogamous" life be good? Every couple here needs to answer that question for themselves, and we don't judge anyone on their choices. Ours are simple. We won't swing with "cheaters", and likely not either with a couple who swings with married male's or married unicorn's if he/she is cheating on their spouse. Nope, not us. To each their own.

 

This topic is, for us, not a pleasant one. YMMV, IOHO, feel free to ignore every one of our words here.

 

Mr. and Mrs. Swingularity

[Guest sandraandalex]

First the whole comment you had about not stirring the rest of the family. If you did this with kids in the house, that just sounds foolish. First letting in a stranger late at night, much less the chance of one of your kids having to process seeing Dad blowing a guy while Mom is fucking him.

 

I'm sure people are this foolish, just strange to see it.-- Sandy

[Lawtonka 36]

No chance of that, as we always play in the bedroom with the door locked. I'm a little shocked by the negative feedback.. well, to each their own I guess.

 

Thanks to those who helped.

[Guest sandraandalex]

Yes, a panicked child banging on a locked door is such a better outcome.

[BeStylnIT 114]

Guess I could see that...

[Isobel 56]

Personally... I would ask. The answer may not be to your liking, or she may not know. There are many things I am in to which I can't understand and express why.. They just make me tick!

 

Moving on to the other side, when my partner and I went swinging, married couples.. Fine.. Married men? No. I am not being the other woman. Naturally wedding rings come off, and I try not to think about it too much or you would start over thinking everything.

 

I would honestly ask her, or if and when you search again, find others that appeal to you both that are perhaps single and bring it up.

[Sunswept 161]

Only she has the answers you seek, and only you have the answers to why you don't want to ask her. But maybe this is a chance to open up the communications a bit between you two? Swinging is a lot more fun when you can talk about anything. Its a lot more safe too.

 

Married people that are cheating are dangerous on many levels, and I will bring up one danger I have not seen mentioned. In my experience, which is long, I have noticed that people that cheat usually do something that gets them caught eventually. I don't know if that is some sort of unconscious thing they do, or if its calculated, but it seems to happen a lot. But I digress.

 

You do not want to get involved in some drama between a cheater and -the rest of their family, their kids, all their friends, maybe the whole town. You do not want to go there, I have seen that happen more than once. If swinging is not about respecting other peoples personal ecology, as well as our own -well then I am not sure I know much about swinging at all. Seriously. Imagine some really hurt and/or pissed of spouse ending up on your doorstep someday. Don't go there. Now, maybe whoever you are playing with has some sort of "arrangement" -OK if that's the case, but be careful. However, I stand by my views about swinging with cheaters, my main point is that married people are often seen as emotionally safe, maybe so. But they are unsafe in so many more serious ways.

[Swingularity 108]

If swinging is not about respecting other peoples personal ecology' date=' as well as our own -well then I am not sure I know much about swinging at all. Seriously.[/quote']

 

Word, Sunswept. Word!

[Sirramm 111]

We won't play with married people unless we know for sure their partner knows and is ok with them playing. The last thing we want to do is come home to a rabbit boiling on the stovetop by the spouse! LOL

 

We have a basic set of agreed upon 'rules' that neither of us will waiver on.

[willyoats 324]

We have had MFM with both married and single guys. Plus, she has had one on one with both. On the whole, she says she prefers the singles as they seem to try harder. She guesses that married guys know they are going to get laid later anyway and the singles know they may not. Hence the difference in motivation.

[GuyInMD79 1,500]

We won't play with married people unless we know for sure their partner knows and is ok with them playing. The last thing we want to do is come home to a rabbit boiling on the stovetop by the spouse! LOL

 

We have a basic set of agreed upon 'rules' that neither of us will waiver on.

This is why, when I contact a couple or single, I always let them know right up front that I'm a married guy playing solo. And we make sure they understand that my Mrs. is available to chat, call, or meet to assure everybody that she is cool with me playing solo sometimes.

 

We have had MFM with both married and single guys. Plus, she has had one on one with both. On the whole, she says she prefers the singles as they seem to try harder. She guesses that married guys know they are going to get laid later anyway and the singles know they may not. Hence the difference in motivation.

As a married guy who plays solo sometimes, I'd like to respectfully disagree with this characterization- at least in my case! I always want to make sure that everybody has a good time. After all, if I don't help to make sure that a good time is had by all, I may not be invited back- that's my motivation!

[Sophy 569]

I have had at least one married, I do not know the others for sure.

We do not have ongoing male friends for our MFMs, all 3 of them have been casual encounters.

[enhancer 1,585]

People can choose to do whatever they want when it comes to the lifestyle! We personally will not play with married men or women that are cheating, because to us it goes against everything the lifestyle is. If they can't respect their own partner how do we expect them to respect us.

 

We will also not play with married men that are in open relationships due to the ridiculous amount of couples online that do not put on their profile they are in a open relationship that friend and flirt with us only to have the husband hit us up for a threesome with whatever excuse about why his wife won't be joining us. At this point we don't care if they can prove it. Our time has been wasted thinking there might be a potential couple to meet and not just the guy. It just pisses us off. It was happening so much we had to change our profile to say that we will not play with attached guys even if they are in an open relationship to try and stop it. Still happens though. We just respond no thanks, but we will gladly play with your wife alone which ends the conversation. We get that many wives are super picky, because they can be, but this woman is not going to be the one to fuck all the guys with wives not interested. She will choose to be picky when it comes to these kinds of one sided deals. This has became one of our biggest pet peeves to the online thing.

[JessicaJamison 861]

On 10/3/2013 at 9:04 PM, Lawtonka said:

First post... and I want to ask a question.

 

We've had a few experiences, and recently a MFM which was the most amazing time! Seeing her pleasured and cum on another guy's cock was a tremendous turn-on for both of us. He had a very nice and thick eight inch cock, which we both sucked for nearly two hours. Seeing her penetrated and tremble with excitement really got me going.

 

Since she knew he was married, she has commented that doing married guys is her preference.

 

I didn't have the guts to ask her why. Any ideas?

Could be because there will be less of an issue with them catching feelings.  Or maybe she likes the naughty side of it.