Tinder: What is it good for? (Last minute swinging encounters?)

[DylanTheThomas 15]

So I've been considering opening up a Tinder account... Some other monogamish friends of mine have had great success with it.

 

I have wonderful success with OKC but since they removed the location based "what are you doing" features its ability to facilitate in the moment fun declined considerably and as much as I love Kasidie, its "rendezvous" feature has never ended in a last minute encounter.

 

So... would Tinder be a another tool in the toolkit or is it too focused on monogamy for it to be effective?

[two4youinswva 3,068]

Since you're in an urban location, it might be effective. It tends to skew young, as in 18-23.

Don't be surprised by the few users of this hookup app that will say they are not "here to hookup".

[funcoupledayton 2,708]

My husband says that looking at dating sites makes him realize how happy he is to be married, and happy that the internet wasn't around when we were dating. So, it's good for that...

[sunbuckus 3,569]

One of Mr. Sun's co-workers uses Tinder and likes to talk about his experiences. The general vibe, for me, is that it's for younger people who are single and only want to have one-night stands. But that could just be the vibe I'm getting due to the reason why Mr. Sun's co-worker uses it. I recently asked Mr. Sun if we should try it out as a couple but as far as he knows, it's for singles.

[DylanTheThomas 15]

So I guess in isolation, if I'm ok with it and the wife's ok with it, we could just use it to get with singles. There's no real reason to go into swinging if they're just looking for a one night stand since hey... so are we. We'd just have to do it as... singles.

 

*twiddles thumbs* I'm a huge fan of full disclosure but if everyone just wants casual sex does it really matter if they're part of the lifestyle?

[Guest]

We used Lifestyle Lounge. com (LL.com) for several years. It's "booty ball" feature is quite good for meeting someone tonight or some future night. It worked well for us in the greater Chicago area as well as when vacationing in smaller towns around the country. Listings are presented to the user in geographic order from your location. It has a very powerful video chat as well. The age group is quite wide until age 60 or so.

[DylanTheThomas 15]

Gotchya.

 

LL and I have had a rocky relationship but if booty ball has truly gotten better then ...excellent.

 

In the meantime I'm throwing caution to the wind, I'm going to go ahead and try "the tinders" and see what happens

[funcoupledayton 2,708]

Keep us posted!

 

Hooking up as singles is not something that interests us and we know very few people in our local swing community who play that way. We occasionally have hall passes, with people we know well and have played with together. In my opinion this is safer and keeps drama to a minimum, everyone knows we are a committed couple.

 

I wouldn't think you'd need to disclose your marital status or your swinger status, if you are a booty call. If they ask, obviously you should be truthful. You need to realize though that your potential playmate could very well be cheating. That doesn't sit well with me and the risk of danger from playing with a cheater isn't worth it to me.

 

There are mentally ill and evil people out there. There was recently a young couple who were killed by someone who was hooking up with them from Craig's List. Crazy people are just as likely to be on Tinder. I wouldn't want my husband to have a one night stand with someone we didn't know and I know he wouldn't want me to be alone with a complete stranger. It might be safer if you agree to meet in a public place and then drive separately to a swing club if you decide to have sex.

[SwingSetWife 444]

There are mentally ill and evil people out there. There was recently a young couple who were killed by someone who was hooking up with them from Craig's List. Crazy people are just as likely to be on Tinder. I wouldn't want my husband to have a one night stand with someone we didn't know and I know he wouldn't want me to be alone with a complete stranger. It might be safer if you agree to meet in a public place and then drive separately to a swing club if you decide to have sex.

 

I need to veer off topic a bit here, but this statement really bothers me. Just because some uses the Internet to harm people, doesn't mean they are crazy or have a mental illness. They are just an asshole that likes to hurt people. People with mental illness sometimes commit crimes, but people without mental illness do to. Being "crazy" doesn't make a person dangerous. And frankly it sickens me that mental illness is viewed this way. Especially by otherwise intelligent people that know that society likes to put people in a box and label them.

 

And this is coming from someone that not only has worked with the mentally ill but also has a documented and diagnosed mental illness.

[funcoupledayton 2,708]

I need to veer off topic a bit here, but this statement really bothers me. Just because some uses the Internet to harm people, doesn't mean they are crazy or have a mental illness. They are just an asshole that likes to hurt people. People with mental illness sometimes commit crimes, but people without mental illness do to. Being "crazy" doesn't make a person dangerous. And frankly it sickens me that mental illness is viewed this way. Especially by otherwise intelligent people that know that society likes to put people in a box and label them.

 

And this is coming from someone that not only has worked with the mentally ill but also has a documented and diagnosed mental illness.

 

I agree with you, not everyone who is mentally ill is dangerous. But, there are people with mental illness who prey on others, and the anonymity of the internet facilitates that. There are mental illnesses such as borderline personality disorder, anti-social personality disorder, psychopathy and some types of schizophrenia that do lead to violent behavior in some individuals. Not all psychopaths are serial killers, but many serial killers display traits of psychopathy. I apologize for not being more specific in my concern about strangers online.

 

My point is that I don't want to risk a one night stand with a psychopath or an evil person. I think using a website for a one night stand as a single can be dangerous.

[SW_PA_Couple 4,026]

Swingers' Web sites generally contain a filter that Tinder and Craig's List do not; paid membership. Neither Ted Bundy nor John Wayne Hacy would have risked unmasking themselves by providing credit-card information that could easily be traced by almost any legal authority.

[two4youinswva 3,068]

Tinder is tied to Facebook accounts, so it has that going for it.

 

Here's my impression of Tinder: 90% of the users are under 25. Most probably use it as a time killer. In other words, while standing in line, you pull it up, and play the "Hot or Not" game. You can run through 20 profiles in a minute, easily. Do people hook up? Most likely, but not as often as one might think, or wish.

 

I messed around with Tinder long enough to realize that I'm way out of the age range, and continuing would make me appear to be creepy old guy.

 

So yeah, if you're younger, it can't hurt to play around with the app. Like ALL sites, smart choices in hooking up should be the rule.

[DylanTheThomas 15]

I can play the creepy old guy, Tinder's linked to my "sexy" fb profile and it's anonymous ~enough~ that I don't think I have to worry.

 

Who knows, if it becomes a source of under 25 playmates, why not. It too bad you can't filter by sexuality. Having said that,

 

I do start my own profile on Tinder with "non-monogamy's a hell of a drug" to get that out of the way but no one looks at profiles so it's really just a disclaimer. We'll see how this goes.

[SwingSetWife 444]

https://www.fox8live.com/story/26135039/incidents-in-no-br-raise-concerns-over-social-meet-up-apps/

[DylanTheThomas 15]

Oh media...

[NorCalRnS 21]

Try Mixxxer.com, it's a swinger-friendly version of Tinder. You can create a profile online but can only logon from your mobile device. Haven't used it when we've been out yet, but read some things about it that make it interesting to try.

[Guest]

I replied earlier about Life Style Lounge dot com. One of the nice things about LL.com was you had a status having been verified or not. Certainly the methods of verification were not totally fool proof but they did provide some degree of comfort.

[SwngrsWarehouse 15]

Why not just have a picture of you and your lady as your profile picture? Surely you will get the question as to who she is.

[sunbuckus 3,569]

Being the curious cat that I am, I decided to check out Tinder. I think it has potential for swingers if enough swingers are on there as well. I think it can work for older folks, too. Just limit your age range that you're looking for. In my swiping, I came across a profile of a couple that stated they were looking for a unicorn. I thought that was illuminating. I will say, it's made me a bit empathetic for the males on Tinder. There are bots and escorts that they have to sift through.