Opinion on watching others for first swing experience

[Thejohnsons 27]

We have never tried swinging any one else think it's a good idea to just start out watching and being watched.. I am very nervous about the whole thing

 

Thanks. Mrs. Johnson

[SW_PA_Couple 4,027]

There are at least 999 different ways to move into the swing lifestyle. My wife and I meet many people at our local area swingers' clubs who like to watch and be watched. It's not unusual. Some seem to consider this as a first step toward eventual full-swap. Other seem to stay in that mode of operation for years and years.

 

I hope this helps,

 

~Michael

[cplnuswing 4,713]

That's certainly one option, and it may be a good way for you to start out I think. Do you have any good on-premise swingers clubs you could attend? A good club is a great way to start since you've got everything there in one place, and what all you take in is totally up to you. You could attend a club, find a corner table or somewhere sort of out of the way, and just watch and learn all evening if that is what you felt comfortable with. By watch in that scenario, I mean watching the crowd, how people interact, dance floor, etc. If you felt comfortable, then you could mingle some too and meet some other people. If you did feel like even more yet, then you could go to one of the play areas, and have sex with each other while others are playing too.

 

The key is to get comfortable, and I think taking that approach might be easier than going the online route and trying to find another couple to soft swing with. It's certainly possible, and maybe you would enjoy the online game, but it carries it's own frustrations and anxiety, and meeting another couple one on one face to face to see if there is any compatibility there is actually more nerve-wracking than going to a club and being surrounded by 100's of other people.

 

Just go at a pace that feels comfortable, don't do anything you don't want to do, and you will find the right approach for you.

[sunbuckus 3,569]

As SW pointed out, there are many ways that people begin their swinging journey. For us, specifically, we did just what you are asking. We went to a swingers club and only played with each other and watched other people. We were easing into it, wanted to check out if we felt comfortable being in such an environment/atmosphere, and then went from there.

[Thejohnsons 27]

We're going to a club for our first time tonight

[LagniappeDC 313]

We did exactly that for around a year at clubs and on dates with like minded couples. Found it very erotic. We took our sweet time moving from dipping our toes in the water to swimming in the deep end, lol. It's your journey. Do what works for you and you'll likely be happy with the results!

[Thejohnsons 27]

Thanks everyone you are being super helpful and welcoming ,we're on our way to a club now .gonna be a good night thanks again J&J

[cplnuswing 4,713]

Good luck! If you like, please let us know how it went. It's a Sunday, not one of the peak nights, so don't know if that will be a good thing or bad thing. Doesn't matter really, as long as you have a fun night out together, then mission accomplished

[Thejohnsons 27]

Well we went no expectations met or expected had a great time karaoke etc my wife did great killed the few songs she sang ,nervousness gone expectations gone great time with my wife check done had a great time with my lady that's what truly matters love ya babe !!

[Guest]

Visiting a couples club, interacting and observing is a good way to start. We had complete 3 or 4 MFM events at hotels and resorts before we went to a couples club and still found it very helpful. We told people there we were new, they talked to us, flirted with us, etc. Later, we went upstairs to the play rooms, watched others play, got into a bed and started to play, just the two of us and then another couple from the adjoining bed politely asked if they would join us. It was all very nice.

[Thejohnsons 27]

We talked with a couple, had a great time ,but there was definitely no chemistry between any of us .

[cplnuswing 4,713]

Don't worry about chemistry, that will happen sooner or later. Contrary to what people outside of swinging think, it's not an easy thing for swingers to find that sexual chemistry with others. You will meets lots of great people you are happy to have met and call your friends, but sexual chemistry will only be there with a much lower number. Couple on couple chemistry is the hardest to find just because there are four people involved, and the more people, the harder it is to get that all-around chemistry going.

 

You had a great time together, mission accomplished. Hopefully this will be the start of many more fun nights together

[Thejohnsons 27]

Yeah it was pretty awesome enjoying my wife's company and everyone up there was pretty cool. It was nice to just chill and feel welcomed and not judged at all what's so ever .my wife looked absolutely beautiful, the environment was awesome and we just sat and talked and laughed ,my cheeks still hurt lol ,good times indeed

[GoldCoCouple 4,072]

Great to hear that things went so well for you. Our first experience was with another couple where we just had same room sex...no interaction between the two couples. There are no rules (other than the ones you make for your selves) other than having a good time. Let us know how your journey goes...

[freddymike 18]

I was watching porn with two other men when I had my first swing experience. It was good. One of the others though went on later to develop a complex so I am not sure that is the best way to start for everyone. I certainly found just going to a club and sitting around and then just asking if anyone minded me doing masturbation when I got randy was a much healthier way of doing things. But like they say the only rules are the ones we make up as a group. I cum with new people all the time in videochat though now so I am sure it is all just a learning curve like anything else. The original guy who ended up in therapy even stole a girlfriend of mine though after refusing me sex in a tent on a camping holiday though so I am sure it is best to stay away from people reporting to private therapists regularly.

[VaRivahCpl 18]

We are looking to do this sort of thing ourselves...enjoy each other while folks are doing the same nearby. This thread was good for us to read. Thanks.

[PASSIONATE MAN 17]

IF~ you watch BASEBALL~U want to play BASEBALL~

LET ME KNOW HOW THIS WORKS FOR U'z!

eddie

[GoldCoCouple 4,072]

The first step is always the hardest. Once we were there we realized that we made it harder on ourselves than it needed to be (but don't we always). Some of the nicest and most respectful people are swingers.

 

VaRivahCpl and The Johnsons, let us know how you're progressing and if there's anything we can do to help...

[VaRivahCpl 18]

We will keep you posted, thanks for the support GoldCo. It is that understanding we hope to encounter and make our experience(s) all the more fun. And who knows...the Passionate Man may be right, we may one day want to take the field.

[Hbeezy 17]

Newbies here also. No experience at all. No threesomes. No girl -girl. Nothing. After much discussion and watching every episode of Swing, webwent to our first club two weeks ago. We were very nervous. As we were doing our newbie orientation and touring the facilities, I was ready to bolt. However after we found a seat and started to look around we relaxed. We saw all types, shapes, ect. Normal regular average people.

Wow who knew?

We didn't talk to anyone and no one approached us but we didn't feel pressured or ignored. We ended up playing together and had a lovely time. We both can't wait to do it again.

[SW_PA_Couple 4,027]

. . . We ended up playing together and had a lovely time. We both can't wait to do it again.

Very pleased to read this. Wishing you continued growth and enjoyment.

[GoldCoCouple 4,072]

Hbeezy: The first step is always the hardest, but looking back on it it usually doesn't seem that hard...and usually kind of silly that it was so hard. Good luck as you continue taking steps.

[VaRivahCpl 18]

Thanks for sharing Hbeezy. Helps our confidence too.

[freddymike 18]

yes. The first club experience for me was the hardest. And doubly so because it had agents in it who reported me. But everything was legal so everything was Ok. It was lucky I was warned there are always one or two agents reporting in places like the one I performed in. I can still remember it now asking if anyone minded if I masturbated then just quietly and professionally getting on with the job on the couch/sofa in front of a few people. It was a charming and sensitive way to start in the clubs. I felt so welcome. I think that is so important the first club performance.

[VaRivahCpl 18]

Been a few months since we last posted. Went to our first party a few weeks back (and a little too busy to post since). We were reassured by how friendly and welcoming everyone was. It was a great time. I (Mr.) have to admit I was thankful we made a rule of "no play" that first party. I ended up being a little more shy than I thought I would be. Oh, I wasn't too shy to talk with everyone, but I thought I would be regretting we made the rule at the end of the night and instead found I was glad for the decision. The Mrs was her usual self and enjoyed talking with everyone, but even more so with one couple in particular. She's more of a small group person anyway.

 

We've talked a lot since then and have solidified where we want this adventure to go. So, yay, it was a great experience and we look forward to seeing where this will go. If anyone from that group is reading this...Thank you.

[GoldCoCouple 4,072]

Thanks for the update, glad to see it went well! Now please keep us informed as you continue.

[freddymike 18]

that's gr8. I am just about to star on adult videochat now and just thought I would log in before. I am glad your first viewing went well. Very glad actually. It's nice being able to talk here to regular groups of people more regular than the people who view me. We need a community site like this for continuity. Shemales like me come and go in the adult videochat scene I know, a lot of viewers just turn off after a few minutes and you never hear from them again. But it is good to know this forum is here.

[M1F2KTJ 473]

I think watching or being watched is a good idea to get started.